Ray's musings and humor

Archive for July, 2017

Ray’s Daily Suspended

Ray’s Daily

July 27, 2017

www.rays-daily.com

ray-toon

I am suspending the Daily temporarily. My wife has been hospitalized and I am spending my time with her,. She will be returning home in a day or two.

Stay well and Happy.

Ray

 

 

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around

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Enjoy your life

Ray’s Daily

July 26, 2017

www.rays-daily.com

enjoy life

Never stop enjoying, life too short to be gloomy everyday. Smile .

I am off to my physical regimen and then to see the musical Ring of Fire at a luncheon matinee. The show is part of my “Ray’s Enjoy Life Program” an effort to get the maximum enjoyment out my days. I hope you allow yourself whatever it takes for you to also enjoy your life.

Enjoy Life!

By Mae

 

Life’s too short to be wasted.

It passes just once, so make the most out of it.

Live life the way you want it to be.

Live it to the fullest, feel free!

 

Live as the sun shines in the sky.

Live as high as the birds can fly.

Live as the colors of a rainbow.

Live as far as the clouds can go.

 

Never waste it with worthless doubts and fears,

With insecurities and useless tears.

Remember that what couldn’t tear you makes you strong.

Put away frustrations, sing your own song!

 

Believe in what you can do.

The world is round; it’s all up to you.

Think fast, act now!

Time is gold; it couldn’t be renewed.

 

Value experiences, learn from mistakes.

Improve for the better, live for others.

Do what is right and what is best.

Always be yourself, unique from the rest.

 

Laugh as if there’s no tomorrow.

Dance as though you’ll never get through.

Love with all your heart and soul.

Sing like you’re on the top of the world.

 

Forget the money, the root of all evil.

Treasure your loved ones; you’re lucky they’re still there.

Strengthen your faith, live with God.

The best things in life are for free, so why not?!

~~~

In all of living, have much fun and laughter. Life is to be enjoyed, not just endured.

Gordon B. Hinckley

~~~

An old lady tottered into a lawyer’s office and asked for help in arranging a divorce.

“A divorce?” asked the unbelieving lawyer. “Tell me, how old are you?”

“I’m eighty-four,” answered the old lady.

“Eighty-four! And how old is your husband?”

“My husband is eighty-seven.”

“My, my,” said the lawyer, “and how long have you been married?”

“Next September will be sixty-two years.”

“Married sixty-two years?! Why would you want a divorce now?”

“Because,” the woman answered calmly, “enough is enough.”

~~~

“If you don’t run your own life, somebody else will.”

John Atkinson

~~~

Isaac was sitting at a table in his favorite restaurant when he called over his waiter.

“Yes?” asked the busy waiter.

“Are you sure you’re the waiter I ordered from?” asked Isaac.

“Why do you ask?” replied the waiter.

“Because I was expecting a much older man by now,” replied Isaac.

~~~

I prefer to describe myself as a “Contemporary Anthropological Interactive Observer” because it has just the right amount of flair. Besides….”stalker” is such an ugly word.

~~~

Sam has been in the computer business for 25 years and is finally sick of the stress. He quits his job and buys 50 acres of land in Vermont as far from humanity as possible. Sam sees the postman once a week and gets groceries once a month. Otherwise it’s total peace and quiet. After six months or so of almost total isolation, he’s finishing dinner when someone knocks on his door. He opens it and there is a big, bearded Vermonter standing there.

“Name’s Enoch… Your neighbor from four miles over the ridge… Having a party Saturday… Thought you’d like to come.”

“Great,” says Sam, “after six months of this I’m ready to meet some local folks. Thank you.”

As Enoch is leaving he stops, “Gotta warn you there’s gonna be some drinkin’.”

“Not a problem… After 25 years in the computer business, I can drink with the best of ’em.”

Again, as he starts to leave Enoch stops. “More ‘n’ likely gonna be some fightin’ too.”

“Damn”, Sam thinks… “Tough crowd.” “Well, I get along with people. I’ll be there. Thanks again.”

Once again Enoch turns from the door. “I’ve seen some wild sex at these parties, too.”

“Now that’s not a problem” says Sam, “Remember I’ve been alone for six months!

I’ll definitely be there… By the way, what should I wear?”

Enoch stops in the door again and says, “Whatever you want, just gonna be the two of us.”

~~~

“If you’re going to do something tonight that you’ll be be sorry for tomorrow morning, sleep late.”

Henry Youngman

~~~

Hanging in the hallway at the High School are the basketball team pictures from the past 40 years. A player in the center of the front row in each picture holds a basketball identifying the year — “62-63,” “63-64,” “64-65,” etc.

One day I spotted a freshman looking curiously at the photos. Turning to me, he said, “Isn’t it strange how the teams always lost by one point?”

~~~

Do what makes you happy, be with who makes you smile, laugh as much as you breathe, and love as long as you live.

Rachel Ann Nunes

~~~

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

You can do it

Ray’s Daily

July 25, 2017

www.rays-daily.com

change

“A year from now you will wish you had started today.”

Karen Lamb

Before I forget let me recommend the movie The Big Sick to you. I saw it recently and loved it, I left the theatre with a warm feeling. It has gotten rave reviews and I understand why.

My day today will be spent again stimulating the health care economy. I will start with an early ophthalmologist appointment where we will continue to work to slow down my sight loss. I then will pick up my $300+ ProAir HFA Inhalation Aerosol that will last me for another month. Later in the day I will visit my dermatologist for some minor outpatient surgery. Other than reporting my vital signs to my heath watchers on Wednesday and Friday I will be done with the docs for this week.

The one truism in life is that it goes on and as it does our world changes. I cannot do all the things I use to do and I have the choice to either spend my days agonizing over that reality or making changes that allow me to enjoy the years ahead.

Here is an abridged article written by Angel Chernoff that can help folks like me as we adjust to our changing realities.

7 Effective Ways to Let Go and Move Forward

  1. Accept the truth and be thankful. – To let go is to be thankful for the experiences that made you laugh, made you cry, and helped you learn and grow. It’s the acceptance of everything you have, everything you once had, and the possibilities that lie ahead. It’s all about finding the strength to embrace life’s changes, to trust your intuition, to learn as you go, to realize that every experience has value, and to continue taking positive steps forward.
  2. Distance yourself for a while. – Sometimes you need to take several steps back in order to gain clarity on a situation. The best way to do this is to simply take a break and explore something else for a while
  3. Focus only on what can be changed. – Realize that not everything in life is meant to be modified or perfectly understood. Live, let go, learn what you can and don’t waste energy worrying about the things you can’t change. Focus exclusively on what you can change, and if you can’t change something you don’t like, change the way you think about it.
  4. Claim ownership and full control of your life. – No one else is responsible for you. You are in full control of your life so long as you claim it and own it. If you want to let go and move on with your life, you’re the only person who can make it happen.
  5. Focus inward. – It’s important to make a difference in the world. Yes, it’s important to help people, but you have to start with yourself. If you’re looking outside yourself to find where you fit in or how you can create an impact, stop and look inside yourself instead. Review who you already are, the lifestyle you’re currently living, and what makes you feel alive. Then nurture these things and make positive adjustments.
  6. Change the people around you when you must. – Some people come into your life just to strengthen you, so you can move on without them. They are supposed to be part of your memory, not your destiny. The bottom line is that when you have to start compromising your happiness and your potential for the people around you, it’s time to change the people around you.
  7. Focus on today. – You can decide right now that negative experiences from your past will not predict your future. Figure out what the next positive step is and no matter how small or difficult, and take it. Ultimately, the only thing you can ever really do is to keep moving forward. There’s no point in denying that things are different now, or being fearful of the next step. Life only moves in one direction—forward.

~~~

“It doesn’t matter where you are, you are nowhere compared to where you can go.”

Bob Proctor

~~~

A young honeymoon couple were touring southern Florida and happened to stop at one of the rattlesnake farms along the road. After seeing the sights, they engaged in small talk with the man that handled the snakes.

“Gosh!” exclaimed the new bride. “You certainly have a dangerous job. Don’t you ever get bitten by the snakes?”

“Yes, upon rare occasions,” answered the handler.

“Well,” she continued, “just what do you do when you’re bitten by a snake?”

“I always carry a razor-sharp knife in my pocket, and as soon as I am bitten, I make deep criss-cross marks across the fang entry and then suck the poison from the wound.”

“What, uh…what would happen if you were to accidentally sit on a rattler?” persisted the woman.

“Ma’am,” answered the snake handler, “that will be the day I learn who my real friends are.”

~~~

Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow.

~~~

“You know those shows where people can call in and vote on different issues? Did you ever notice there’s always like 18 percent that say ‘I don’t know’? It costs 90 cents to call up and vote–and they’re voting ‘I don’t know.’

“Honey, I feel very strongly about this. Give me the phone. (Into phone)… ‘I DON’T KNOW!’ (Hangs up looking proud.)

“Sometimes you have to stand up for what you believe you’re not sure about.”

Andy Rooney

~~~

Doug and Bill started a business from scratch. Through hard work hey built it into a very successful company with sales in the millions. Doug and Bill lived like kings. Almost overnight, things changed. Sales dropped sharply, customers disappeared and the business failed. Doug and Bill blamed each other and they parted on unfriendly terms.

Five years later, Doug drove up to a decrepit diner and stopped for a cup of coffee. As he was wiping some of the crumbs from the table, a waiter approached the table. Doug looked up and gasped, it was Bill.

“Bill,” he said, shaking his head. “It’s a terrible thing seeing you working as a waiter in a place like this.”

“Yeah,” said Bill, curling his lip, “But at least I don’t have to eat here.”

~~~

“Your life does not get better by chance, it gets better by change.”

Jim Rohn

~~~

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

 

Just keep going

Ray’s Daily

July 24, 2017

www.rays-daily.com

perseverance

When the world says, “Give up,” Hope whispers, “Try it one more time.”

One of the great changes I have noticed at this time in my life is how I view my activities. In my earlier years I had a tendency to focus on the bigger events — a major meeting, my next cruise and such. I, like so many others did not pay much attention to the events that filled my day. In retrospect, I wish I had valued them more.

I find now that important thing in my life is what happens each day. There is some satisfaction in getting through a day with minimum pain and no significant failures while appreciating all that went well. I find too many folks tend to count their pains without being grateful for all they have that is painless. I honestly believe that the secret to successful aging is attitude and perseverance, in fact I now know it is the secret to enjoyment no matter how old you are.

So don’t get bogged down in despair for there is always a way.

                Know, There is a Way

When darkness comes and fear fills your heart,

Know, there is a way.

When all your dreams come crashing down,

Know, there is a way.

When friends cannot be found and there is

No one to comfort you,

Know, there is a way.

When you are ready to lay down and quit,

Know, there is a way.

To know is to find the way.

Knowing cannot be found out there.

Knowing is found in the silence

Of surrender within.

The way is within.

   by: John McIntosh and Rev. JoAnn (Ananda) Polito

~~~

Sometimes you feel like giving up, but then you look at other people who have given up, and the results aren’t that good.

Robert Brault

~~~

Paddy was driving down the street in a sweat because he had an important meeting and couldn’t find a parking place. Looking up to heaven he said, “Lord take pity on me. If you find me a parking place I will go to Mass every Sunday for the rest of me life and give up me Irish Whiskey”.

Miraculously, a parking place appeared. Paddy looked up again and said, “Never mind, I found one.”

~~~

Learn to write your hurts in sand. Learn to carve your blessings in stone!

~~~

How to Lie to the Bathroom Scales

  1. Weigh yourself with clothes on, after dinner…as well as in the morning, without clothes, before breakfast, because it’s nice to see how much weight you’ve lost overnight.
  2. Never weigh yourself with wet hair.
  3. When weighing, remove everything, including glasses. In this case, blurred vision is an asset. Don’t forget the earrings, these things can weigh at least a pound.
  4. Use cheap scales only, never the medical kind, because they are always five pounds off…to your advantage, of course.
  5. Always go to the bathroom first.
  6. Stand with arms raised, making pressure on the scale lighter. (Waving them is optional but occasionally helps!)
  7. Don’t eat or drink in the morning until AFTER you’ve weighed in, completely naked, of course.
  8. Weigh yourself after a haircut, this is good for at least half a pound of hair (hopefully).
  9. Exhale with all your might BEFORE stepping onto the scale (air has to weigh something, right?)
  10. Start out with just one foot on the scale, then holding onto the towel rack in front of you, slowly edge your other foot on and slowly let off of the rack. Admittedly, this takes time, but it’s worth it. You will weigh at least two pounds less than if you’d stepped on normally.

~~~

The best auto safety device is a rearview mirror with a police car in it.

~~~

A minister in a little church had been having trouble with the collections.

One Sunday he announced, “Now, before we pass the collection plate, I would like to request that the person who stole the chickens from Brother Martin’s hen house please refrain from giving any money to the Lord. The Lord doesn’t want money from a thief!”

The collection plate was passed around, and for the first time in months everybody gave.

~~~

There’s one thing about baldness…..it’s neat.

~~~

From British Newspapers

Commenting on a complaint from a Mr. Arthur Purdey about a large gas bill, a spokesman for North West Gas said, “We agree it was rather high for the time of year. It’s possible Mr. Purdey has been charged for the gas used up during the explosion that destroyed his house.” (The Daily Telegraph)

Irish police are being handicapped in a search for a stolen van, because they cannot issue a description. It’s a Special Branch vehicle and they don’t want the public to know what it looks like. (The Guardian)

At the height of the gale, the harbourmaster radioed the coastguard and asked them to estimate the wind speed. They replied they were sorry, but they didn’t have a gauge. However, if it was any help, the wind had just blown his Land Rover off the cliff. (Aberdeen Evening Express)

~~~

People are always blaming their circumstances for what they are. I don’t believe in circumstances. The people who get on in this world are the people who get up and look for the circumstances they want, and, if they can’t find them, make them.

G.B. Shaw

~~~

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

 

You’ll love the medicine

Ray’ Daily

July 21, 2017

www.rays-daily.com

laugh_ha_ha

If you’re too busy to laugh, you are too busy.

Proverb

A friend told me the other day that he knew someone who had given up on life. His acquaintance said that he was ready to die. He focused on his aches and pains as well as the things he did not like about his world. The sad part was the man was in his early sixties and has many good years ahead if he chooses to do something about his bleak view of his existance.

I later thought about how Norman Cousins years ago was told his life would soon be over and decided he was not ready to go. Below you will see how the cure he chose for himself allowed him to live for twenty more years.

Laughter is The Best Medicine

Many years ago, Norman Cousins was diagnosed as “terminally ill”. He was given six months to live. His chance for recovery was 1 in 500. He could see the worry, depression and anger in his life contributed to, and perhaps helped cause, his disease. He wondered, “If illness can be caused by negativity, can wellness be created by positivity?”

He decided to make an experiment of himself. Laughter was one of the most positive activities he knew. He rented all the funny movies he could find – Keaton, Chaplin, Fields, the Marx Brothers. (This was before VCRs, so he had to rent the actual films.) He read funny stories. He asked his friends to call him whenever they said, heard or did something funny. His pain was so great he could not sleep. Laughing for 10 solid minutes, he found, relieved the pain for several hours so he could sleep.

He fully recovered from his illness and lived another 20 happy, healthy and productive years. (His journey is detailed in his book, Anatomy of an Illness.) He credits visualization, the love of his family and friends, and laughter for his recovery. Some people think laughter is a waste of time. It is a luxury, they say, a frivolity, something to indulge in only every so often. Nothing could be further from the truth. Laughter is essential to our equilibrium, to our well-being, to our aliveness. If we’re not well, laughter helps us get well; if we are well, laughter helps us stay that way.

Since Cousins’ ground-breaking subjective work, scientific studies have shown that laughter has a curative effect on the body, the mind and the emotions. So, if you like laughter, consider it sound medical advice to indulge in it as often as you can. If you don’t like laughter, then take your medicine – laugh anyway.

Use whatever makes you laugh – movies, sitcoms, Monty Python, records, books, New Yorker cartoons, jokes, friends. Give yourself permission to laugh – long and loud and out loud – whenever anything strikes you as funny. The people around you may think you’re strange, but sooner or later they’ll join in even if they don’t know what you’re laughing about.

Some diseases may be contagious, but none is as contagious as the cure. . . laughter.

 By Peter McWilliams From “Chicken Soup for the Surviving Soul”

~~~

A good laugh and a long sleep are the best cures in the doctor’s book.

Irish Proverb

~~~

God said, “Adam, I want you to do something for me.”

Adam said, “Gladly, Lord, what do You want me to do?”

God said, “Go down into that valley.”

Adam said, “What’s a valley?”

God explained it to him.

Then God said, “Cross the river.”

Adam said, “What’s a river?”

God explained that to him, and then said, “Go over to the hill…….”

Adam said, “What is a hill?” So, God explained to Adam what a hill was.

He told Adam, “On the other side of the hill you will find a cave”

Adam said, “What’s a cave?” After God explained, he said, “In the cave you will find a Woman.” Adam said, “What’s a woman?” So God explained that to him, too. Then, God said, “I want you to reproduce.”

Adam said, “How do I do that?” God first said (under his breath), “Aw, Man!!!” And then, just like everything else, God explained that to Adam, as well.

So, Adam goes down into the valley, across the river, and over the hill, into the cave, and finds the woman. Then, in about five minutes, he was back. God, his patience wearing thin, said angrily, “What is it now?”

And Adam said, “What’s a headache?”

~~~

A perfect parent is a person with excellent child-rearing theories and no actual children.

Dave Barry

~~~

When the heir to the Rothschild estate visited a poor Jewish village near Budapest, the locals poured out to greet him. With all due ceremony, he was given a small parade, met with the mayor, and awarded a key to the city.

At the local inn, he ordered some roast chicken for brunch. When he finished, he received a bill larger than the most expensive bottle of wine his family sold.

“This is outrageous!” he shouted at the innkeeper. “Never in my life have I been billed so much for a roast chicken! Are chickens that rare around here?”

“Not at all,” said the innkeeper reassuringly. “But millionaires — ah, they are a rarity!”

~~~

Today is the Tomorrow you worried about Yesterday. Was it worth it?

~~~

A vacationer e-mailed a seaside hotel to ask its location. “It’s only a stone’s throw away from the beach,” he was told.

“But how will I recognize it?” asked the man.

Back came the reply: “It’s the one with all the broken windows.”

~~~

When you don’t know what to do, walk fast and look worried. Paul Dickson

~~~

Two teenagers were arrested. The police sergeant told them they were entitled to a phone call. Some time later a man entered the station and asked for them by name.

The sergeant said, “I suppose you’re their father……..or maybe their lawyer?”

“Nope, neither,” the chap replied. “I’m just here to deliver their hot pizza.”

~~~

He said, “Some women are terribly hard to please – the rest are impossible!”

~~~

A man was in bad shape. He constantly gasped for breath and his eyes bulged.   The doctors didn’t give him long to live.

He decided to live it up. Withdrawing all of his money from the bank, he went on a shopping spree. His last stop was at the most expensive haberdasher in the city. He pointed out a dozen silk shirts. He wore a size fourteen.

The clerk said, “Your neck looks bigger than fourteen. You need a sixteen.”

The man said, “I know my size. I want them in a fourteen.”

The clerk said, “I’ll get them for you, but I want to warn you…if you wear a fourteen you’ll gasp all day and yours eyes will bulge.”

 

~~~

“I love people who make me laugh. I honestly think it’s the thing I like most, to laugh. It cures a multitude of ills. It’s probably the most important thing in a person.”

Audrey Hepburn

~~~

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

 

I do appreciate them

Ray’s Daily

July 20, 2017

good-friend

Sometimes the most ordinary things could be made extraordinary, simply by doing them with the right people.

Elizabeth Green

Today is going to be an especially good one for me as I am having breakfast with a writer friend and lunch with an actress friend. As my life has become more sedentary I have learned just how important friends are to my continued enjoyment.

I don’t do as much as I use to but many of my friends continue to do great things in their active lives and I enjoy learning of their exploits. Other friends have gained wisdom over the years and getting to see the world through their eyes is a blessing.

Over the years I have visited many places, did some surprisingly good things but nothing has been better than the people I have met and the ones who have become friends. I have found that friends will walk with you during the tough times and cheer with you during good times. Not only that but as reported in the following article, they are good for your health.

Friendships: Enrich your life and improve your health

By Mayo Clinic Staff

Friendships can have a major impact on your health and well-being, but it’s not always easy to build or maintain friendships. Understand the importance of friendships in your life and what you can do to develop and nurture friendships.

What are the benefits of friendships?

Good friends are good for your health. Friends can help you celebrate good times and provide support during bad times. Friends prevent loneliness and give you a chance to offer needed companionship, too. Friends can also:

  • Increase your sense of belonging and purpose
  • Boost your happiness and reduce your stress
  • Improve your self-confidence and self-worth
  • Help you cope with traumas, such as divorce, serious illness, job loss or the death of a loved one
  • Encourage you to change or avoid unhealthy lifestyle habits, such as excessive drinking or lack of exercise

Friends also play a significant role in promoting your overall health. Adults with strong social support have a reduced risk of many significant health problems, including depression, high blood pressure and an unhealthy body mass index (BMI). Studies have even found that older adults with a rich social life are likely to live longer than their peers with fewer connections.

Why is it sometimes hard to make friends or maintain friendships?

Many adults find it hard to develop new friendships or keep up existing friendships. Friendships may take a back seat to other priorities, such as work or caring for children or aging parents. You and your friends may have grown apart due to changes in your lives or interests. Or maybe you’ve moved to a new community and haven’t yet found a way to meet people.

Developing and maintaining good friendships takes effort. The enjoyment and comfort friendship can provide, however, makes the investment worthwhile.

What’s a healthy number of friends?

Quality counts more than quantity. While it’s good to cultivate a diverse network of friends and acquaintances, you also want to nurture a few truly close friends who will be there for you through thick and thin.

~~~

Time decides who you meet in life, your heart decides who you want in your life, and your behavior decides who stays in your life.

Ziad K. Abdelnour

~~~

Two women were discussing reincarnation.

One asked the other if her husband believed in it.

The second woman said, “Does my husband believe in life after death? My husband doesn’t even believe in life after dinner!”

~~~

Not everything that counts can be counted, and not everything that can be counted counts.

~~~

One day a man approached Groucho Marx and he said, “Please insult my wife. My wife loves your work. It would really give her a thrill if you insulted her.”

Groucho turned to the man and said, “Sir, you should be ashamed of yourself: To be married to a woman like that and not be able to think up your own insults!”

~~~

The one function TV news performs very well is that when there is no news we give it to you with the same emphasis as if there were.

David Brinkley

~~~

A young Scottish lad and lassie were sitting on a low stone wall, holding hands, and just gazing out over the loch. For several minutes they sat silently, then finally the girl looked at the boy and said, “A penny for your thoughts, Angus.”

“Well, uh, I was thinkin’. . .perhaps it’s aboot time for a wee kiss.”

The girl blushed, then leaned over and kissed him lightly on the cheek. Then he blushed.

Then the two turned once again to gaze out over the loch. After a while the girl spoke again. “Another penny for your thoughts, Angus.

“The young man knit his brow. “Well, now,” he said, “my thoughts are a bit more serious this time.”

“Really?” said the girl in a whisper, filled with anticipation.

“Aye,” said the lad. “Din’na ye think it’s aboot time ye paid me that first penny?”

~~~

Waste your money and you’re only out of money, but waste your time and you’ve lost part of your life.

Michael Leboeuf

~~~

After they had brought their first baby home from hospital, a young wife suggested to her husband that he try his hand at changing diapers.

“I’m busy”, he said. “I’ll do the next one.”

The next time the baby was wet, she asked if he was now ready to learn how to change diapers.

He looked puzzled. “Oh,” he replied finally. “I didn’t mean the next diaper. I meant the next baby!”

~~~

You’ll need coffee shops and sunsets and road trips. Airplanes and passports and new songs and old songs, but people more than anything else. You will need other people and you will need to be that other person to someone else, a living breathing screaming invitation to believe better things.

Jamie Tworkowski

~~~

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

 

 

How’s Yours?

Ray’s Daily

July 19, 2017

www.rays-daily.com

Wherever you go, no matter what the weather, always bring your own sunshine.

Anthony J. D’Angelo

sunrise

I have often been inspired by people I meet who have the ability to take on almost any task with enthusiasm. They spend little time thinking something may be too difficult to attempt rather they move on and do it.

I hope I am wrong but it seems like there is a growing propensity on the part of many people to focus on what’s wrong instead of appreciating what is right.

Here is a story that I think holds the key to happiness, I hope you do too.

What Am I

I am seldom considered, though I do more to influence everything about you than virtually any one thing in your life. I often control the time you get up in the morning, the time you go to sleep, what you eat and drink and the very thought that runs through your head. I can make you either happy or sad, loving or hateful, cheerful or remorseful, congenial or spiteful and in doing so, control the very capacity that you have for success.

No, you don’t often think of me instead you BLAME the problem I create on the shortcoming of others, or the state of the economy, or your family or a million other reasons. Often at times unable to find anyone else to BLAME you look for shortcomings within yourself on which to lay the BLAME.

When my impact on your life fully is considered in your every thought and action, when you are mindful of my awesome power, when you nurture and groom me for positive use in your life, I can become more contagious than the most prolific disease ever witnessed by man. My influence will spread to every person you come in contact with.

Groomed and nurtured in a positive manner there will be no person or obstacle that can stand in the way of my success or fail to be impacted for the better.

‘I Am Your Attitude’

~~~

Everyday there will be an opportunity to Frown or to Smile, to Drown or to Dance, to be Sad or to be Glad. It’s a Choice!

Author Unknown

~~~

The veterinarian told the her that her dog needed some exercise. “You need to make sure this dog runs around,” the doctor said.

“Try playing a game of fetch with him.”

“I can’t play fetch with my dog,” she said.

“Why not?” the doctor asked.

“Because,” she replied, “He can’t throw.”

~~~

Everyone hears what you say. Friends listen to what you have to say. Best friends listen to what you don’t say!

~~~

A guy walks into a shoe store and asks for a pair of shoes, size 8.

The obviously well trained salesman says, “But sir, you take an 11 or eleven-and-a-half.”

“Just bring me a size eight!” the man replies.

The sales guy brings them and the man stuffs his feet into them and stands up in obvious pain. He turns to the salesman and says, “I’ve lost my house to the I.R.S., I live with my mother-in-law, my daughter ran off with my best friend, my business has filed Chapter 7, and my son just told me he was gay. The only pleasure I have left is to come home at night and take my shoes off.”

~~~

People who fight fire with fire usually end up with ashes.

Abigail Van Buren

~~~

My friend’s mother is a proper Southern lady and a passionate gardener who spends hours outside with her plants. In her neighborhood, where she has lived most of her life, no one has fences and every yard is open to the next.

Recently one of her longtime neighbors, an elderly man, moved away. “Are you going to miss him?” my friend asked.

“Actually I’m relieved,” her mother replied. “Now I can bend over.”

~~~

“Blessed is he who expects nothing, for he shall never be disappointed.”

Alexander Pope

~~~

Bill had always been teased by his friends that his wife was more successful than he was. Some even went so far as to insinuate that he was overshadowed by her and henpecked. Bill had a sense of humor and always laughed it off.

One day, one of his fiends asked the tiresome question AGAIN, “Who wears the pants in your family?”

“I do,” replied Bill. Then, after a pause, he added, “I also wash and iron them.”

~~~

Everyone seems normal….. Until you get to know them.

~~~

He said: As a senior at St. Cloud State University in Minnesota, I often engage women psychology majors in heated discussions about male-female relationships. Once, my friend Shelly and I got into a hot debate about whether men or women make the larger sacrifice of their respective gender characteristics when they get married. To my surprise, Shelly agreed with me that men give up far more than women.

“You’re right, Steve,” she said. “Men generally give up doing their cleaning, their cooking, their grocery shopping, their laundry.”

~~~

“The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.”

Eleanor Roosevelt

~~~

The new librarian decided that, instead of checking out children’s books by writing the names of borrowers on the book cards herself, she would have the youngsters sign their own names. She would then tell them that they were signing a “contract” for returning the books on time.

Her first customer was a second grader, who looked surprised to see a new librarian. He brought four books to the desk and shoved them across to the librarian, giving her his name as he did so.

The librarian pushed the books back and told him to sign them out. The boy laboriously printed his name on each book card and, with a look of utter disgust on his face, handed them to the librarian.

Before the librarian could even start her speech, the boy said, disdainfully, “That other librarian we had could write.”

~~~

“It isn’t what you have or who you are or where you are or what you are doing that makes you happy or unhappy. It is what you think about it.”

Dale Carnegie,

~~~

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

 

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