Ray's musings and humor

Archive for February, 2010

Good bye old friend

… joy and sorrow are inseparable. . . together they come and when one sits alone with you . . . remember that the other is asleep upon your bed.

Kahlil Gibran

 

 

 

I lost another friend and fellow Kiwanis member yesterday, a good guy who gave much to others, he will be missed and long remembered. His passing reminded me that we each must learn to deal with grief and sadness. Today even more than in the past sorrow raises its head because of things like unemployment, loss of home and friends, and in my case dealing with the health problems of those of us who are on the path to “Old Guy” status. Associated with these realities is the necessity for each of us to resist being taken down by the burdens we carry. If we succumb to letting our sorrow take us into depression it often puts us in a hole too deep to crawl out of. As hard as it may be to realize, lingering sadness is a choice that you do not have to make.

Here is something I saved to revisit when tragedy, bad news, or health reversals hit. I hope you never need it but if you do I hope it helps. And oh yes, do me a favor and smile often.

Here are some steps to take to turn your sad feeling into a happy one.

By Lori Snyder

 Step one: Feel happy that you are aware of your sad feeling. This means you are alive, deep down you really do not want to stay the walking mummy you may now feel like, it is not who you really are. Now that you want to change something you are not happy about, you can begin taking the steps to do so. Know that this is an inside job it is your choice and no one else’s. So feel happy that you can get going with this task right now, no need to wait for any one thing, it is all inside you.

You can take action towards changing that sad feeling. You may not be able to change the situation, but you have the power within you to tackle the feeling, and create a happy one, along with creating things in your life that make you happy. So feel happy that you are aware of your sad feeling, and take the steps to change that feeling into a happy one.

Step two: Since you are aware you are living in a moment of feeling sad about something and are not happy, you now have the power to choose to live in the moment, and be happy. You are of course allowed to acknowledge your sad feeling, but then let it go. Do not let it control your essence. Begin to live in the moment. By living in the moment, you can change those recent negative energy vibrations into happy, energized empowered vibrations. You can begin to feel happy, and take those not so great energy vibrations and trash them; you can be empowered with the knowledge of knowing that what you send out is what you get back. So, be aware that the more good energy vibrations you send out, the more you will attract those good energy levels back to you.

Step three: Now, let’s take a look at all the good things you can expect to pop into your life now that you chose to take the steps towards living in the moment. For starters, you can treasure each moment for the precious moment that it is, and immerse yourself fully in creating the kind of moments you truly want in your life and enjoy them to the fullest extent.

Being in the moment also:

• Helps you to forgive and forget unhappy situations of the past.

• Helps you to not focus and worry about a future that is not here yet.

• Makes you much more confidant to make decisions based on now, not on what would’ve, could’ve, and should’ve been.

• Helps you to bring more passion into your intimate relationship now, without worrying about where you are going together. That moment will come on it’s own.

• Helps you to focus on the steps to take now, at this moment, to ensure you of achieving your goals quicker then you may have thought, because you are taking the steps, at this moment, each day to come a little closer to your wish.

• Being in the moment, gives you the chance to be at peace, and to be content and happy, not when something happens, but NOW.

Step four: Know that the emotional or physical pain you may feel, is good. This means that you can now start peeling away at those deep layers of what is not working, and make a decision to start coming up with a better solution to your situation. Make it start working towards your happiness, not against it. Research, dig deep into your soul, meditate, and educate yourself to learn what you need to in order to change a situation. Become focused, determined and strong to strive for the outcome you want. Do not settle for anything less, you are too special.

Step five: Now that you are aware that you may not have been enjoying your journey to it’s fullest, wake-up and smell the roses. When you stop taking for granted all that is around you, and begin to notice and appreciate it, your whole world opens up to beauty and love.

Start taking notice of an amazing rainstorm, a wonderful sunset, a beautiful baby laughing or crying, all the amazing different opportunities and variety in this world, great sex, empowering music, people we love, our family and our friends, etc. There is so much we have to be grateful for; I can’t even begin to touch the surface of it. But notice it, be aware of it and appreciate it.

So there you have it. Five reason to be happy you WERE sad, now you are on a different path one that leads towards your being happy. Enjoy the journey, enjoy the change. Begin now to only look for the silver lining.      

~~~

We have to believe that even the briefest of human connections can heal. Otherwise, life is unbearable.

Agate Nesaule

~~~

When it hurts to look back, and you’re scared to look ahead, you can look beside you and your best friend will be there.

~~~

A GOOD HUSBAND:

·      Consistently spills things in the same location as to avoid making more than one stain in the carpet.

·      Sees to it that he doesn’t always sit in the same place on the couch, to avoid making those unsightly twin-divots.

·      Masters the art of halfway-communication so that he can watch TV and still answer: uh huh, oh, I see what you mean, etc. at the right time.

·      Is able to avoid use of the same excuse two-times-in-a-row.

·      Has learned that a new vacuum cleaner, iron, etc. do not make acceptable anniversary presents.

·      Admits with only minor prodding that watching Monday Night Football together does not constitute a "date" or family home evening (where applicable).

·      Has learned all of the children’s names so that he doesn’t have to refer to them as, "Hey, you there".

·      Knows the proper time to give a sincere compliment and also the proper time to say something such as, "Its definitely an interesting dress."

~~~

"Inside every older person is a younger person – wondering what the heck happened"

~~~

A little old man was escorted into the witness box. After being sworn in, the lawyer asked him to explain what happened. After a lengthy discussion of the events leading up to the incident, he finally got around to the meat of the case. 

"and then she hit me with a maple leaf." 

"Surely that couldn’t have caused you any serious injury?" said the lawyer. 

"Are you kidding?" exclaimed the old man. "It was the leaf from the center of our dining room table." 

~~~

If aliens are smart enough to travel through space, why do they keep abducting the dumbest people on Earth?

~~~

The pain passes, but the beauty remains.

Pierre Auguste Renoir

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

 

Ray Mitchell

 Indianapolis, Indiana

 Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies.

The editor is somewhat senile.

 

This daily is sent only to special people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can join at http://groups.google.com/group/Rays-Daily. Back issues are posted at http://raykiwsp.multiply.com/journal currently there are about 2000 readers from around the world.

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See how easy that was!

If that is as bad as it gets, things are pretty good.

 

 

The other day I talked about the problems created by our procrastination and how ever increasing backlogs make things even worse. I know that when I face the fact that there is more for me to do than there is time to do it my discomfort level shoots way up. I don’t remember if I included expediting as one of the solutions to backlog reduction, if I didn’t I should have. If I expedite and quickly handle a task I not only take something off my to do list, I also feel better. Let me give you an example.

Instead of a new Daily today read this one that I published five years ago.

See, I just expedited.

~~~

February 25, 2005

I got so distracted putting together yesterdays daily that I did not tell you about my Wednesday. I had an early morning blood test appointment and as I usually do, I hung out my clothes for the next morning the night before, everything from socks and underwear to suit and shoes. All proceeded as normal, underwear on, check; shirt on, check; I then took the freshly cleaned suit off the hook and low and behold, no pants, not a good thing. I went to a back up dress program and started my day.

All went well, I was to meet a good friend for lunch at 12:15, I waited outside the restaurant (it was pretty cold) for about a half hour before I learned that my friend was home sick with the flu, she had e-mailed me earlier but the message was missent so I didn’t get it, that was not a good thing either.

Since I now had time on my hands, I went to a nearby restaurant to get one of my favorite sandwiches, only to learn they don’t make them anymore. As you can tell things were not moving well at all. Since they did not have what I wanted I decided to go to a super-store and see if I could purchase something that my wife wanted, of course they did not have it. As I was pulling out of the parking lot I collided with another car ($1,200 damage on my car, more on hers), that was a bad thing.

We exchanged insurance information and I started off to go to my friend Terry’s viewing at the funeral home, I took a wrong turn and was able to turn a ten minute trip into a forty-five minute trip via a short cut that was probably 20 miles longer.

Later, on my way home from the body shop where I got my estimate I decided to stop at a deli that serves good New York hot Pastrami sandwiches, the sandwich was great and so my day was not all that bad after all.

Fortunately yesterday was much better. The highlight of the day was the funeral celebration of my friend Terry’s life. I thought of that old adage, you can learn much about someone by the friends he has. As I looked around the chapel I saw people from all over our nation in attendance, these are good people who shared Terry’s dedication to serving others. Terry is gone now but his memory will live forever.

~~~

Few cases of eyestrain have been developed by looking on the bright side of things.

Author Unknown

~~~

A young woman was having a physical examination and was very embarrassed because of a weight problem. As she removed her last bit of clothing, she blushed. "I’m so ashamed, Doctor," she said, "I guess I let myself go."

The physician was checking hers eyes and ears. "Don’t feel ashamed, Miss.  You don’t look that bad."

"Do you really think so, Doctor?" she asked.

The doctor held a tongue depressor in front of her face and said, "Of course. Now just open your mouth and say "Moo!"

~~~

A waiter comes over to a table full of Jewish women and asks, "Is anything all right?"

~~~

An optometrist was instructing a new employee on how to charge a customer.

"As you are fitting his glasses, if he asks how much they cost, you say ‘$75.’

If his eyes don’t flutter, say, ‘For the frames. The lenses will be $50.’

If his eyes still don’t flutter, you add ‘Each.’"

~~~

"Jack, will you still love me when my hair is grey?" asks Rachel.

"Of course," says Jack. "I’ve loved you through blonde, brunette, red and every other color. Why not grey?"

~~~

Irving walked into a lawyer’s office and inquired about the lawyer’s rates.

"$150 for three questions," replied the lawyer.

"Isn’t that awfully steep?" asked Morris.

"Yes," the lawyer replied, "and what was your third question?"

~~~

Courage does not always roar. Sometimes, it is the quietest voice at the end of the day saying, "I will try again tomorrow".

Paulette Tuers

~~~

An old nun who was living in a convent next to a Brooklyn construction site noticed the coarse language of the workers and decided to spend some time with them to correct their ways. She decided she would take her lunch sit with the workers and talk with them. She put her sandwich in a brown bag and walked over to the spot where the men were eating.

She walked up to the group and with a big smile said : . . .  "Do you men know Jesus Christ?"

They shook their heads and looked at each other. One of the workers looked up into the steelwork and yelled "Anybody up there know Jesus Christ?"

One of the steelworkers asked why.

The worker yelled "His wife is here with his lunch".

~~~

Historians have found the first treaty the U.S. government ever signed with the Indians.  It states that the Indians can keep their lands "for as long as the river runs clear, the buffalo roam, the grass grows tall and the mountains stand proud – or ninety days – whichever comes first.

~~~

Life is a paradise for those who love many things with a passion.

Leo Buscaglia

~~~

"I was riding my camel in the middle of the Sahara," exclaimed the Muslim.  "Suddenly, a fierce sandstorm appeared out of nowhere.  I truly thought my end had come as I lay next to my camel while we were being buried deeper and deeper under the sand.  But I didn’t lose my faith in Allah.  I prayed and prayed, and suddenly, for ten miles all around me, the storm stopped and I was able to get back to my village.

The Christian chimed in.  "One day while I was fishing in a little rowboat in the ocean, a giant storm came from nowhere. 50 foot waves!  I thought my end had truly come.  I prayed and prayed to God, and then, for ten miles around me, the storm ceased and I was able to row back to shore."

The Jew started.  "I was in the middle of New York City. Suddenly, a black bag on the ground appeared out of nowhere.  I put my hand inside and found that it was full of cash.  I truly thought my end had come as it was a Saturday and we’re not allowed to handle money on the Sabbath.

But I didn’t lose my faith.  I prayed and prayed, and suddenly, for ten miles around me, it was *Tuesday*!"

~~~

Men’s Rules

Anything we said six or eight months ago is inadmissible in an argument.

All comments become null and void after seven days.

If we say something that can be interpreted in two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other way.

Let us ogle. If we don’t look at other women how can we know how pretty you are?

You can either ask us to do something OR tell us how you want it done – not both.

Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during the commercials.

When we’re turning the wheel and the car is nosing onto the highway exit, your saying "This is our exit" is not necessary.

~~~

Old Jacob Johnson, a raging hypochondriac, was convinced that the pain on his left side was appendicitis.  Mrs Johnson explained that his appendix is on the right.

"So, aha!  THAT’s why it hurts so much…." said Jacob.

"My appendix is on the wrong side!"

~~~

Life is 10 percent what you make it and 90 percent how you take it.

Irving Berlin

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

 

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies.

The editor is somewhat senile.

 

This daily is sent only to special people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can join at http://groups.google.com/group/Rays-Daily. Back issues are posted at http://raykiwsp.multiply.com/journal currently there are about 2000 readers from around the world.

If I could do it anyone can!

Happiness is the interval between periods of unhappiness.

Don Marquis

 

 

 

I got a message from one of my favorite people, a young college student in another state. He said in part:

Was there ever a time in your life where you felt completely…stuck? Like in a state of crisis due to confinement or anything like that? I’m not sure how to explain how I am feeling. It’s not like my college is a bad school or anything, it’s just that I am not enjoying my classes very much. Personally, they seem trivial. I’ve been feeling this way for a few months now. I’ve been trying to stick through it but it just doesn’t go away. It’s like an unnerving sickness in my stomach that I can’t kick.

I’m not sure what it is. I have friends on campus, I hang with them everyday, but I can’t say that I am close to them. I have talked to them all about my problems and they try to build me back up to the best of their ability but it just doesn’t work.

Everything here just…it feels controlled and pointless. The question "what is the point?" keeps coming up in my head. I do have a feeling of being stuck here. So I figured I would let you in on what is going on with me as you are all wise in your own ways with your own life experiences. Just would like some advice during this…rough patch or whatever it is. 

I was somewhat taken aback with his message as this is one special kid. He is bright, outgoing and talented. But in some respects his message reminds me of myself when I was young. We who are older often forget the pain that comes from adapting to the world as we moved from our youth into adulthood. In my case life changes took me to lonely places, places where I was isolated from past friends and any support systems. I worked to earn the tuition that allowed me to attend a school where I was only one of only two students that were not World War II veterans. I was pretty much on my own and I was only 15.

For a period of time I felt just like my young friend now does. I spent so much time analyzing why I was unhappy and focused on what was wrong that I had little time to see what was right. Even knowing what was right was not the total answer as I felt I needed more right in my life if I was going to get better. Of course wishful thinking built upon undefined need for happiness really seldom helps much. What saved me was finding things that kept me engaged, things that did not allow me much time to think about my loneliness. I studied things I had no need to study and learned things that I was never going to get in class, and to this day I am glad I did. I also often left my safe sanctuary looking for new experiences and often discovered things and people I would never have thought would be as interesting as they where.

I have another college friend who might have written the same thing to me, not that long ago he was in misery but pulled himself out of it in part due to his adopting a daily workout routine that allowed him to see and feel the progress he was making in muscle, body tone and a surprising amount of positive thought.

Someone said not that long ago that these periods of youthful pain are character building and for most of us they are. As we age we realize that things do change. More often than not our lives are even better than we deserve them to be and in the process we learn that these pains pass. But even though that is true when I was young, broken hearted and lonesome I did not believe it.

Sadly we often don’t take what our young friends tell us seriously as we don’t think it is that big a deal, trust me it is. I just hope my young friend learns as I did that staying dormant focused on what’s wrong just makes things worse, fortunately I was not about to let events take me down so I went out, did things, stayed busy and fortunately stumbled across stuff that I cherish even to this day.

So my friends, whoever you are, don’t take yourself down, put the kick back in your step and come back out and live.

~~~

I am more and more convinced that our happiness or our unhappiness depends far more on the way we meet the events of life than on the nature of those events themselves.

Wilhelm von Humboldt

~~~

Yesterday is history

Tomorrow is a mystery

Today is a gift.

That’s why it’s called the present!

~~~

I Used To Be Schizophrenic, But We’re OK Now

~~~

A 3rd-grade girl came home from school. She was very happy, and her Mom noticed

this.  Mom asked, "What makes you so happy today?"

The girl said, "Mom, we learned how to make babies in school today!"

Thinking that 3rd grade was a bit early for that, she asked her daughter to tell her how.

"It’s easy, Mom — you just drop the y, and add ies," the daughter said.

~~~

You spend the first 2 years of their life teaching them to walk and talk.

Then you spend the next 16 telling them to sit down and shut-up.

~~~

QUESTIONS I’VE WONDERED ABOUT

Do people in Australia call the rest of the world "up over"?

Does killing time damage eternity?

Why doesn’t Tarzan have a beard?

Why is it that night falls and day breaks?

Why is it that when you are driving and looking for an address, you turn down the radio?

Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?

Do pilots take crash courses?

How can there be self-help "groups"?

~~~

"Filthy Stinking Rich… Well, Two Out of Three Ain’t Bad"

~~~

A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds.  After explaining the commandment to "honor thy father and thy mother," she asked "Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?"

Without missing a beat one little boy (the oldest of a family) answered, "Thou shall not kill."

~~~

"Before they invented drawing boards, what did they go back to?"

George Carlin

~~~

The bartender asks the guy sitting at the bar, "What’ll you have?" The guy answers, "A scotch, please." The bartender hands him the drink, and says "That’ll be five dollars," to which the guy replies, "What are you talking about?  I don’t owe you anything for this."

A lawyer, sitting nearby and overhearing the conversation, then says to the bartender, "You know, he’s got you there.  In the original offer, which constitutes a binding contract upon acceptance, there was no stipulation of remuneration."

The bartender was not impressed, but says to the guy, "Okay, you beat me for a drink.  But don’t ever let me catch you in here again."

The next day, same guy walks into the bar.  Bartender says, "What the heck are you doing in here?  I can’t believe you’ve got the audacity to come back!"

The guy says, "What are you talking about?  I’ve never been in this place in my life!" The bartender replies, "I’m very sorry, but this is uncanny.  You must have a double."

To which the guy replies, "Thank you.  Make it a scotch."

~~~

"I hate housework! You make the beds, you do the dishes, and six months later you have to start all over again."

Joan Rivers

~~~

I am determined to be cheerful and happy in whatever situation I may find myself. For I have learned that the greater part of our misery or unhappiness is determined not by our circumstance but by our disposition.

Martha Washington

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

 

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

 Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies.

The editor is somewhat senile.

 

This daily is sent only to special people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can join at http://groups.google.com/group/Rays-Daily. Back issues are posted at http://raykiwsp.multiply.com/journal currently there are about 2000 readers from around the world.

I want to complete today’s Daily

Nothing is so fatiguing as the eternal hanging on of an uncompleted task.

William James

 

 

I was with one of my college student grandsons today and I admitted that I was a compulsive avoider; I think the technical term is procrastinator. Yep, it seems like I live at the deadlines and do so for no good reason. Even minor tasks seem to want to linger so they can keep me from reaping the rewards of efficient accomplishment. My recent life style changes seem to have helped me get a better focus and have kept me from getting too bogged down in the trivial. If you ever have had the same problem you might have experienced the bi-polar aspects of quickly moving from dread to euphoric accomplishment. I have probably shared all this with you before but it hit home when my grandson described what he planned to do tomorrow without yet having defined what tomorrow he was talking about. When I got home I remembered that I had something written sometime ago by spiritual life coach Shelia Skarp that might help us all. Here is what she wrote.

A Simple Way to Stop Procrastination Today

All of us are guilty of procrastinating at some point or another. We put off unpleasant tasks for as long as we possibly can simply because our mind tells us we don’t want to do them. Try this experiment to see what kinds of tricks your mind is capable of playing on you.

Say to yourself,

"I have to rake the yard."

"I have to get the laundry done."

"I must clean the floors."

"I need to get that presentation done for work."

How are you feeling right now? Are you feeling overwhelmed and like you are all of a sudden carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders? Are you suddenly "too tired" to do any of these things?

Now say this to yourself,

"I want to rake the yard."

"I would love to get the laundry done."

"I’ll feel so much better once the floors are cleaned."

"I’m excited to get that presentation done for work."

Do you notice the difference in how you feel? Don’t all of these tasks seem very doable and easy now? Of course they do! The Ego is all about self-gratification and doing what feels good. If you allow yourself to think that something is hard or complicated, the Ego is very happy to provide you with a hundred reasons why it would be too hard for you to accomplish, so why bother trying? But if you tell yourself that you want something done and put a positive spin on it, the Ego doesn’t have the opportunity to make excuses.

If simply changing the way you phrase your task list isn’t providing enough oomph to get you off the couch, you can expand your inner dialogue. In the past, your Ego has given you many excuses to procrastinate. Now, let it give you reasons to act!

Here is a simple template you can use for your internal conversation with your ego.

"I want to _______________________ because:

1. ______________________________

2. ______________________________

3. ______________________________

When I am done with this, I will reward myself by ______________________."

Let’s use the above example of raking the yard to see how this will work. "I want to rake the yard because it is covered with leaves. Getting those leaves cleaned up will allow the grass to grow and green up faster, and the yard will look a lot nicer. I will also get some nice exercise and will get to spend some time outside soaking up the sun and fresh air. When I am done with this, I will reward myself by relaxing with my favorite book for an hour or two."

How does that feel for you? Instead of giving yourself excuses to not do something, you have given yourself reasons to do it! Not only that, but you have promised your Ego the reward that he/she loves to have.

The more you work with the template, the easier it will be to stop procrastinating and start acting. Soon, this internal conversation will be routine for you and procrastination will become a thing of the past.

So now I want to complete today’s Daily so that I don’t feel guilty sending something from the past. When I am done I’ll reward myself with a piece of fruit and that magazine I have been trying to get to. See you tomorrow.

~~~

The two rules of procrastination:

1) Do it today.  2) Tomorrow will be today tomorrow.

~~~

More signs that you have grown up:

MTV News is no longer your primary source for information.

You go to the drugstore for Ibuprofen and antacids, not condoms and pregnancy test kits.

A $4.00 bottle of wine is no longer ‘pretty good stuff.’

You actually eat breakfast foods at breakfast time.

Grocery lists are longer than macaroni & cheese, diet Pepsi & Ho-Ho’s.

I just can’t drink the "way I used to" replaces "I’m never going to drink that much again."

Over 90% of the time you spend in front of a computer is for real work.

You don’t drink at home to save money before going to a bar.

~~~

The only cure for insomnia is to get more sleep.

~~~

One evening a preschooler, Kristel, and her parents were sitting on the couch chatting. Kristel asked, " Daddy, you’re the boss of the house, right?"  Her father proudly replied, "Yes, I am the boss of the house."

But Kristel added "Cause Mommy put you in charge, huh Daddy?"

~~~

I am a nutritional overachiever.

~~~

"HEADSTONE INSCRIPTIONS"

 

Here lies my wife,

I bid her goodbye.

She rests in peace

and now so do I.

 

Here lies Henry Blake

He stepped on the gas

Instead of the brake.

~~~

I am having an out of money experience.
~~~

"Oh, No!"  he gasped as he surveyed the disaster before him. Never in his 40 years of life had he seen anything like it.  How anyone could have survived he did not know.  He could only hope that somewhere amid the overwhelming destruction he would find his 16-year-old son.

Only the slim hope of finding Danny kept him from turning and fleeing the scene.  He took a deep breath and proceeded.  Walking was virtually impossible with so many things strewn across his path.  He moved ahead slowly.

"Danny!  Danny!"  he whispered to himself.  He tripped and almost fell several times.  He heard someone, or something, move.  At least he thought he did.  Perhaps, he was just hoping he did. He shook his head and felt his gut tighten.  He couldn’t understand how this could have happened.

There was some light but not enough to see very much. Something cold and wet brushed against his hand.  He jerked it away. In desperation, he took another step then cried out, "Danny!"

From a nearby pile of unidentified material, he heard his son. "Yes, Dad," he said, in a voice so weak he could hardly hear.

"It’s time to get up and get ready for school," the man sighed, "and, for heaven’s sake, clean up this room."

~~~

"To think too long about doing a thing often becomes its undoing."

Eva Young

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

 

Ray Mitchell

 Indianapolis, Indiana

 Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies.

The editor is somewhat senile.

 

This daily is sent only to special people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can join at http://groups.google.com/group/Rays-Daily. Back issues are posted at http://raykiwsp.multiply.com/journal currently there are about 2000 readers from around the world.

You’ve been pardoned

Every word, facial expression, gesture, or action on the part of a parent gives the child some message about self-worth. It is sad that so many parents don’t realize what messages they are sending.

Virginia Satir

 

 

Far too many people I have met have grown up in a negative world. As an infant they constantly heard “NO, you know better than to do that” or “why don’t you pay attention” and similar criticisms. Often it continued into puberty and beyond with such things as “your lazy and just don’t try” or “so you got a B, why wasn’t it an A?” and on and on, never being told they had done well. Often these years of put downs result in an expectation of failure and the feeling that they are just not good enough. Many give up and quit trying for fear if they did try they would fail and the critics would pounce on them again with the “you’re a loser” comments.

These are people who always want you to tell them exactly what you want them to do, yep they are the task oriented folks who are so afraid of failure that they have lost confidence in their own abilities. What is tragic is that these criticism are often unfounded, made by those who have not found success themselves and so they put everyone else down feeling like that increases their own stature and anyway if they can’t be happy why should anyone else be. What is even worse is that those who have let others destroy their self confidence are most of the time much better then they think they are the result of letting criticism turn them into less than they can be.

Many are so debilitated that they seek professional help and spend hours and lots of money revisiting the past in order to correct and neutralize their negative view of themselves. Not everyone can afford the time nor the money to get traditional help so I have a way that might work for many. I suggested to a friend once that they cop a plea and plead guilty to their perceived failures, true or not, and get free of the past. Their punishment and rehabilitation has taken place during the time they already have served being unhappy. So with their new freedom they can now look forward and inventory the positive parts of their lives and take pride in who they are and what they are going to do. They don’t have to go out and be the best at everything, not even the best at any one thing; all they need to do is be the best at being the person they already are. One of the nice things about full release from the past is that there are no more probation officers; critics can be told to shove off or at least told to quit finding fault and if they won’t stop they sent on their way to do their dirty work elsewhere.

Find and listen to positive people and real friends who offer sound support and send the others on their way. Everyone can be happy if they learn to accept and like themselves.

~~~

"If one asks for success and prepares for failure, he will get the situation he has prepared for."

Florence Scovel Shinn

~~~

A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the freeway. Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that the person behind the wheel was knitting!

The trooper cranked down his window and yelled to the driver, "PULL OVER!"

"NO!" the driver yelled back, "SCARF."

~~~

Conscience is what hurts when everything else feels so good.

~~~

A distraught patient phoned her doctor’s office. "Is it true," the woman wanted to know, "that the medication you prescribed has to be taken for the rest of my life?"

"Yes, I’m afraid so," the doctor told her.

There was a moment of silence before the woman continued, "I wonder then, just how serious is my condition. This prescription is marked ‘NO REFILLS’."

~~~

I used to think I was indecisive, but now I’m not sure

~~~

Every evening, a mother and her young son, knelt down beside his bed so he could say his prayers. One night, obviously bored with the same old prayer, the little boy said this: "Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray the Lord my soul to keep, if I should die before I wake…… can I have breakfast with you in the morning?"

~~~

It’s bad luck to be superstitious.

~~~

She sent me this:

I’m really not an addict,

There is no need to shout;

But talking with my puter friends,

Has turned my life about.

I still do the grocery shopping,

And make a bed or two;

But instead of staring at the television

I spend some time with you.

I go with friends or family,

To dinner or a show;

I take the time to hear my kids,

Or to watch a flower grow.

But yes, you’ll find me off and on,

Sitting on my puter chair;

And talking to my cyber friends,

Who always seem to care.

There are redeeming qualities,

And hear me if you will;

Since playing in this cyber world,

I’ve improved keyboarding skill.

In fact I feel at peace with life,

Things are going well;

The only thing it hasn’t done,

Is teach me how to spell!

~~~

Each day comes bearing its own gifts. Untie the ribbons.

Ruth Ann Schabacker

~~~

Thinking his son would enjoy seeing the reenactment of a Civil War battle, my niece’s husband took the boy, Will, to the event. But the poor child was terrified by the booming cannons. During a lull, Will’s dad finally got him calmed down. That’s until the Confederate general yelled, "Fire at will!"

~~~

Each day we make deposits in the memory banks of our children.

Charles Swindoll

~~~

Our family owned restaurant is the setting for many of our discussions about how to handle the customer who asks, "What’s good tonight?"

Obviously, we would never serve anything we didn’t think was good. I braced myself one Saturday night when I heard the dreaded question posed to my husband.

He calmly replied, "Anything over $13.95."

~~~

"Of all the judgments we pass in life, none is more important than the judgment we pass on ourselves".

Nathaniel Branden

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

 

Ray Mitchell

 Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies.

The editor is somewhat senile.

 

This daily is sent only to special people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can join at http://groups.google.com/group/Rays-Daily. Back issues are posted at http://raykiwsp.multiply.com/journal currently there are about 2000 readers from around the world.

Miserable? Try a dose of humor!

“A sense of humor… is needed armor. Joy in one’s heart and some laughter on one’s lips is a sign that the person down deep has a pretty good grasp of life.”

Hugh Sidey

 

 

I don’t know if it is the new medications or something else but I have been moping around the last couple of days with flu like symptoms or cold like symptoms, oh you know what I mean achy, breaky – where is the chicken soup stuff. Since my brain as well as my nose is running, your better off with this daily from February 19, 2007.

~~~

If there is one thing I am sure of after all these years sharing the daily, it is that humor is the answer, it is the best medicine, it defuses even the worst situation and I have yet to see a relationship in trouble when both partners sustain a healthy sense of humor. This morning I spent a little bit of time with a friend who was having a really bad day, I mean one of those big time stinkers. Fortunately we had the opportunity to spend about an hour together finding humor even in some of the lousy things that had happened. We laughed together and you know what? We both left looking forward to the good day ahead. If you have been suffering from sense of humor deficit lately you might want to follow the suggestions of international speaker/writer/cartoonist Mike Moore who wrote:

Here are a few ideas you can use to make certain that laughter remains an ever present reality in your relationships thus ensuring their quality and endurance. Start slowly by working on your own fun loving, cheery disposition. Laughter and humor are contagious so it won’t be long before others catch the bug.

* Remember that a sense of humor is learned, not inherited.

* Commit to becoming a humor hound. Look for humor everywhere. When something strikes you funny enjoy it. Let the laughter flow. After the funny event has passed recall it and enjoy it and laugh again.

* Begin to cultivate an atmosphere of humor and laughter in your relationships. Try to enjoy and share humor as often as you can.

* Learn to laugh at yourself. If you don’t, you leave the job to others.

* Encourage others to share their humor. Listen and appreciate it when they do. When someone sees that you have enjoyed their humorous contribution they will be eager to continue sharing.

* Collect cartoons and jokes and put them on display on the fridge or the bulletin board

* Watch comedy movies and television programs as often a possible.

* Use humor to neutralize conflict in your relationships. When things get tense use self deprecating humor to lighten things up. I remember one evening having an argument with my wife, Carol. In the heat of the moment she said something totally out of character. She said something hurtful. In my surprise I looked at her and said, “Carol, when you say things like that you stoop to my level.” She started to laugh and so did I. It wasn’t long before things were back to normal.

Is Moore right? I think so. If he is then we do have a choice of having fun days or letting the negative things in our lives pull us down. That reminds me, did I ever tell you the one about…….

~~~

“A keen sense of humor helps us to overlook the unbecoming, understand the unconventional, tolerated the unpleasant, overcome the unexpected, and outlast the unbearable

Billy Graham

~~~

Thibodeaux’s two kids are in the same class at school, and the teacher had the class write reports about their pets. After the reports were all turned in, the teacher called one of the Thibodeau youngsters up to her desk and scolded him. "This report on ‘My Dog’ is exactly, word for word, the same as your brother’s. Did you copy from him?"

He replies, "Mais, no Ma’am, it’s about de same dog!"

~~~

She said: I disagree with my psychiatrist’s assertion that I’m depressed because I have a serotonin imbalance. I’m pretty sure the real reason is: My life sucks!

~~~

NEW OFFICE POLICY

Dress Code:

You are advised to come to work dressed according to your salary. If we see you wearing Prada shoes and carrying a Gucci bag, we will assume you are doing well financially and therefore do not need a raise.

If you dress poorly, you need to learn to manage your money better, so that you may buy nicer clothes, and therefore you do not need a raise.

If you dress just right, you are right where you need to be and therefore you do not need a raise.

Sick Days:

We will no longer accept a doctor’s statement as proof of sickness. If you are able to go to the doctor; you are able to come to work.

Personal Days:

Each employee will receive 104 personal days a year. They are called Saturdays & Sundays.

Bereavement Leave:

This is no excuse for missing work. There is nothing you can do for dead friends, relatives or co-workers. Every effort should be made to have non-employees attend the funeral arrangements. In rare cases where employee involvement is necessary; the funeral should be scheduled in the late afternoon. We will be glad to allow you to work through your lunch hour and subsequently leave one hour early.

Bathroom Breaks:

Entirely too much time is being spent in the toilet. There is now a strict three-minute time limit in the stalls. At the end of three minutes, an alarm will sound, the toilet paper roll will retract, the stall door will open, and a picture will be taken. After your second offense, your picture will be posted on the company bulletin board under The "Chronic Offenders" category. Anyone caught smiling in the picture will be sectioned under the company’s mental health policy.

Lunch Break:

Skinny people get 30 minutes for lunch, as they need to eat more, so that they can look healthy.

Normal size people get 15 minutes for lunch to get a balanced meal to maintain their average figure.

Chubby people get 5 minutes for lunch, because that’s all the time needed to drink a Slim-Fast.

 

Thank you for your loyalty to our company. We are here to provide a positive employment experience. Therefore, all questions, comments, concerns, complaints, frustrations, irritations, aggravations, insinuations, allegations, accusations, contemplations, consternation and input should be directed elsewhere.

The Management

~~~

"Those are my principles. If you don’t like them I have others."

Groucho Marx

~~~

While making rounds, a doctor points out an X-ray to a group of medical students.

"As you can see," she says, "the patient limps because his left fibula and tibia are radically arched.

Michael, what would you do in a case like this"?

"Well," ponders the student, "I suppose I’d limp too."

~~~

Even in a time of elephantine vanity and greed, one never has to look far to see the campfires of gentle people.

Garrison Keillor

~~~

She said: I’m embarrassed to admit it, but I’ve tried online dating. I haven’t met anyone in person yet because the guys always stop writing before we can set up a date. I don’t know what it is. Perhaps that handsome athletic thirty-two-year-old doctor was lying about his age, got grounded, and lost his internet privileges. Or maybe it was something I said, "I’d love to meet for coffee. Thursday’s are best for me. That’s when my neighbor picks up my four kids from my three previous marriages."

~~~

Humor is a reminder that no matter how high the throne one sits on, one sits on one’s bottom.

Taki

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

 

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

 Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies.

The editor is somewhat senile.

 

This daily is sent only to special people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can join at http://groups.google.com/group/Rays-Daily. Back issues are posted at http://raykiwsp.multiply.com/journal currently there are about 2000 readers from around the world.

Don’t drink the poison!

“Never in this world can hatred be stilled by hatred; it will be stilled by non-hatred – this is the law Eternal”

Buddha

 

 

 

I have found myself forwarding a lot more information to my public affairs readers expressing concern that our citizens seem unwilling to deal with the economic realities that face us all. We are setting up our children for a disastrous future when we can no longer support ourselves as a nation on borrowed money. It is estimated that the service on our national debt will be about $500 billion per year in the not too distant future unless we do something now. Sadly it seems that we want the benefits but we don’t want to pay for them and we elect politicians who pander to our greed rather than do the courageous thing by rising above partisanship and working to do the right thing before it is too late.

I won’t use the Daily as the vehicle to vent my frustration; I have other places where I can do that. But I do want to express my concern about what seems to be the growing propensity to blame others for what is happening to the point that reason is being pushed out, replaced by irrational hatred. I truly feel sorry for the haters as they have become a victim of a poison that destroys people’s ability to enjoy life and withers their soul. I know progress is never made when the haters line up against each other unwilling to even try to understand anything other than their own view. I don’t think I really hate anything except maybe hate itself.

Maya Angelou shared her thoughts on hate sometime ago and I saved what she wrote, I think now is a good time to share it with you.

Haters

A hater is someone who is jealous and envious and spends all their time trying to make you look small so they can look tall. They are very negative people to say the least.  Nothing is ever good enough! When you make your mark, you will always attract some haters… That’s why you have to be careful with whom you share your blessings and your dreams, because some folk can’t handle seeing you blessed…

It’s dangerous to be like somebody else… If God wanted you to be like somebody else, He would have given you what He gave them!  Right?

You never know what people have gone through to get what they have… The problem I have with haters is that they see my glory, but they don’t know my story…If the grass looks greener on the other side of the fence, you can rest assured that the water bill is higher there too!

We’ve all got some haters among us!

Some people envy you because you can:

a) Have a relationship with God

b) Light up a room when you walk in

c) Start your own business

d) Tell a man/woman to hit the curb (if he/she isn’t about the right thing)

e) You are a strong person and don’t let people run you over

f) You have a strong and loving marriage and they can’t get in-between spouses to spoil it

Haters can’t stand to see you happy. Haters will never want to see you succeed.

How do you handle your undercover haters? You can handle these haters by:

1. Knowing who you are & who your true friends are *(VERY IMPORTANT!!)

2. Having a purpose to your life: Purpose does not mean having a job. You can have a job and still be unfulfilled. A purpose is having a clear sense of what God has called you to be. Your purpose is not defined by what others think about you.

3. By remembering that what you have is by divine prerogative and not human manipulation.

Fulfill your dreams!  You only have one life to live…when it’s your time to leave this earth, you want to be able to say, ‘I’ve lived my life and fulfilled my dreams, Now I’m ready to go HOME!

When God gives you favor, you can tell your haters, ‘Don’t look at me…Look at who is in charge of me…’

~~~

But the greatest menace to our civilization today is the conflict between giant organized systems of self-righteousness — each system only too delighted to find that the other is wicked — each only too glad that the sins give it the pretext for still deeper hatred and animosity.

Herbert Butterfield

~~~

There was once a general store in central Kansas back around 1900. The owner was an elderly man who went to church for a long time. The store always had those two or three "older gentlemen" that you always see on the front porch talking about "the war" or how it used to be. Anyway, this certain storeowner had the habit of quoting Scripture every time he made a transaction, and it was always a different verse.

It got to where the old men on the porch came in every time a customer showed up just to hear what the verse was going to be. Well, one day, a Texan came in and inquired about the rug that was hanging on the wall. The man asked about the price of the rug, and the owner told him $400. But, the owner and the old men all knew that the true worth was about $200. So the Texan thought it over and said, "I’ll take it!"

He bought the rug and left the store.

The old men stared at the owner in anticipation of what possible Scripture could follow such a dishonest act. The owner said, "He was a stranger, and I took him in."

~~~

I am becoming increasingly worried that there isn’t enough anxiety in my life.

~~~

Flying to Los Angeles from San Francisco the other day, a passenger noticed that the "Fasten Seat Belts" sign was kept lit during the whole journey, although the flight was a particularly smooth one.

Just before landing, he asked the flight attendant about it.

"Well," she explained, "up front there are 17 University of California girls going to Los Angeles for the weekend. In back, there are 25 Coast Guard enlistees…..

So…..what would you do?"

~~~

In my day, we didn’t have water.  We had to smash together our own hydrogen and oxygen atoms.

~~~

When my wife had to rush to the hospital unexpectedly, she asked me to bring her a few items from home. One item on her list was "comfortable underwear." Worried I’d make the wrong choice, I asked, "How will I know which ones to pick?" "Hold them up and imagine them on me," she answered. "If you smile, put them back."

~~~

"Nice guys finish last, but we get to sleep in."

Evan Davis

~~~

A father is asked by his friend, "Has your son decided what he wants to be when he grows up?"

"Yes, he wants to be a garbage collector," replied the boy’s father.

His friend thought for a moment and responded, "That’s a rather strange ambition to have for a career."

"Well," said the boy’s father, "he thinks that garbage collectors only work on Tuesdays!"

~~~

Growth in wisdom may be exactly measured by decrease in bitterness.

Friedrich Nietzsche

~~~

One beautiful Sunday morning, a priest announced to his congregation:

"My good people, I have here in my hands three sermons…a $100 sermon that lasts five minutes, a $50 sermon that lasts fifteen minutes, and a $10 sermon that lasts a full hour. "Now, we’ll take the collection and see which one I’ll deliver."

~~~

I will permit no man to narrow and degrade my soul by making me hate him.

Booker T. Washington

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

 

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

 Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies.

The editor is somewhat senile.

 

This daily is sent only to special people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can join at http://groups.google.com/group/Rays-Daily. Back issues are posted at http://raykiwsp.multiply.com/journal currently there are about 2000 readers from around the world.

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