Ray's musings and humor

Archive for October, 2016

Let’s make it a good week

“Even the darkest night will end and the sun will rise.”

Victor Hugo

stay-positive

I am expecting to have a good week ahead I hope you will too. I even got a gift from an old friend already, she sent me a new friend that will meet tomorrow.

Last week I mentioned that a friend had said that I was always upbeat. In truth there are times when it is a little more difficult than it usually is. Just in case you like me need a kick start on your day you might find the following helpful. I have had to do some minor editing for space but have kept the good stuff.

Here are ways to stay optimistic during your most difficult hour:

Look at what can go right.

When things go wrong, our minds love to jump to conclusions and think of worst-case scenarios. We want to play out the worst possible outcome. This kind of catastrophic thinking isn’t useful. See what can go right for a change. Focus on what the best-case scenario can be.

Know that everything – good and bad – passes.

No matter how bad things are, they will pass. Has there ever been a life event or situation you’ve been in that hasn’t gone away? Either the situation will change, your perspective will change or your life will change. You’re not going to suffer forever. You will see happiness again.

Imagine the life you want to have.

One way to keep your head and spirits up is to imagine what’s possible. Instead of focusing on things you can’t do anything about (the past), why not envision the life that’s possible? Why not go about setting intentions and desires for the changes you want to see? Don’t let current circumstances dictate the future. No matter how bad it is, it can get better.

Treasure the moment in front of you.

While it’s best to release the past and envision the future, the ultimate place of being is the present. You’re fine right now. You’re fine in each instant you pay attention to. This is what’s called mindfulness. If you can be completely in the moment at hand, you won’t suffer the pain of the past or get anxious about the unknowns of tomorrow.

Remember what is working in your favor.

There may be things you can’t do anything about, but what is helping you? Who is part of your support system? How can something develop more positively? What are the lucky breaks that may resolve the situation? Having a positive and high-frequency attitude towards the way things are going to play out will help move circumstances in a positive direction..

Look for ways to give.

When you get caught up in your problems, you tend to focus on yourself and become preoccupied with what’s happening to you. A simple way to break this pattern of self-sabotage and ruminating on your problems is to do things for others. Help someone. Take a friend out for lunch. Call a family member who might need to hear from you. Buy someone a coffee. Do something nice for someone. Be an agent of generosity and kindness.

Use more empowering words.

The words we use reflect our thinking and our beliefs. The way you talk about a situation can impact how you see and feel about it. Talking too much about a negative life event or circumstance doesn’t help, either. Don’t spend hours sharing your negativity with everyone you know. Be mindful of your language and the words you use to describe the problems you’re facing. The more gentle you can be with your words, the better you will feel about the situation.

By Vishnu Subramaniam

~~~

“You’ll never find a rainbow if you’re looking down”

Charlie Chaplin

~~~

In a stationery store, I quickly picked out a card for my wife for our anniversary.  The clerk was surprised by how little time it took me, and she began relating a story about another customer who spent a half-hour searching for the right anniversary greeting.

Noticing the man lingering over one card after another, the clerk went to see if she could help.

“Is there a problem?” she asked.

“Yes, there is,” he replied ruefully.  “I can’t find one my wife will believe.”

~~~

I don’t suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it.

~~~

Jamie asked his dad to explain the difference between irritation, aggravation, and frustration.

His father picked up the phone and dialed a number at random. When the phone was answered, he asked, “Can I speak to Rolf, please?”

“No! There’s no one named Rolf here,” replies the person who answered the phone.

The father hung up. “That, my boy, is irritation.”

He picked up the phone again, dialed the same number, then asked for Rolf a second time. “No, there’s no one here called Rolf. Go away. If you call again I’m calling the cops,” the person said.

The father hung up and said, “That’s aggravation.”

“Then what’s frustration?” asked Jamie. The father picked up the phone and dialed the same number a third time.

“Hello, this is Rolf. Have I received any phone calls?”

~~~

If at first you do succeed, try not to look astonished.

~~~

“Can people predict the future with cards?” Jessica asked Danny.

“My mother can,” Danny replied.

“Really?”

“Yes,” Danny told her, “she takes one look at my report card and can tell me exactly what will happen when my Daddy gets home.”

~~~

Did you know that the biggest sellers in the bookstores are cookbooks.

The second biggest seller is diet books about how not to eat what you’ve just learned how to cook.

~~~

This guy was sitting in his attorney’s office. “Do you want the bad news first or the terrible news?” the lawyer said.

“Give me the bad news first.”

“Your wife found a picture worth a half-million dollars.”

“That’s the bad news?” asked the man incredulously. “I can’t wait to hear the terrible news.”

“The terrible news is that it’s of you and your secretary.”

~~~

She said: I want to be like Barbie, that bitch has everything.

~~~

A new baby, when he was still in hospital, said to the little babe lying next to him, ‘I know I am a boy!’

The other baby said, ‘What! How DO you know that??’

‘Well, it’s under the blanket; I can show you…’

‘Show me! Show me!’

‘SSST! Wait till the nurses are gone…’

A few minutes later: ‘I can show you now. Watch!’

Slowly the baby lifted up his blanket, the other baby peeking under it. ‘Can you see it?’ The first one said,

‘You see it, down there?’

‘But WHAT should I see?’

‘I’m wearing blue socks!!’

~~~

“Optimism is a strategy for making a better future. Because unless you believe that the future can be better, you are unlikely to step up and take responsibility for making it so.”

Noam Chomsky

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

Hear the music

“I finally figured out the only reason to be alive is to enjoy it.”

Rita Mae Brown

life3

Yesterday a friend of mine told me that I seem to be committed to enjoying my days even though some of them are somewhat difficult. I appreciated his comment as I try not to waste time agonizing over what is preferring to concentrate on what might be. Bottom line was he did not think that my liking the bright side was a lack of intelligence but rather one of a positive attitude.

It might have been fate but later I ran across the following article. I had to abridge it a little but not too much. I don’t know who wrote it but it was written by a gal I would love to meet some day.

Hear The Music

Author Unknown

Too many people put off something that brings them joy just because they haven’t thought about it, don’t have it on their schedule, didn’t know it was coming or are too rigid to depart from their routine.

I got to thinking one day about all those women on the Titanic who passed up dessert at dinner that fateful night in an effort to cut back. From then on, I’ve tried to be a little more flexible.

Because Americans cram so much into their lives, we tend to schedule our headaches… We live on a sparse diet of promises we make to ourselves when all the conditions are perfect!

Life has a way of accelerating as we get older. The days get shorter, and the list of promises to ourselves gets longer. One morning, we awaken, and all we have to show for our lives is a litany of “I’m going to,” “I plan on,” and “Someday, when things are settled down a bit.”

When anyone calls my ‘seize the moment’ friend, she is open to adventure and available for trips. She keeps an open mind on new ideas. Her enthusiasm for life is contagious. You talk with her for five minutes, and you’re ready to trade your bad feet for a pair of Rollerblades and skip an elevator for a bungee cord.

My lips have not touched ice cream in 10 years. I love ice cream. It’s just that I might as well apply it directly to my stomach with a spatula and eliminate the digestive process. The other day, I stopped the car and bought a triple-decker. If my car had hit an iceberg on the way home, I would have died happy.

Now… go on and have a nice day. Do something you WANT to do… not something on your ‘SHOULD DO’ list. If you were going to die soon and had only one phone call you could make, who would you call and what would you say? And why are you waiting?

Have you ever watched kids playing on a merry go round or listened to the rain lapping on the ground? Ever followed a butterfly’s erratic flight or gazed at the sun into the fading night? Do you run through each day on the fly? When you ask “How are you?” Do you hear the reply?

When the day is done, do you lie in your bed with the next hundred chores running through your head? Ever told your child, “We’ll do it tomorrow.” And in your haste, not see his sorrow? Ever lost touch? Let a good friendship die? Just call to say “Hi”?

When you worry and hurry through your day, it is like an unopened gift… Thrown away… Life is not a race. Take it slower. Hear the music before the song is over.

~~~

“We’re so busy watching out for what’s just ahead of us that we don’t take time to enjoy where we are.”

Bill Watterson

~~~

Just before their first long deployment two Navy buddies were talking about the stress of leaving their families. A senior officer, a veteran of many deployments, overheard the conversation and offered the following advice:

“You must be sensitive to your wives’ emotional needs,” he said. “Never, ever, whistle while you pack!”

~~~

Each day we make deposits in the memory banks of our children.

Charles Swindoll

~~~

An old man limped into the doctor’s office and said, “Doctor, my knee hurts so bad, I can hardly walk!”

The doctor slowly eyed him from head to toe, paused and then said, “Sir, how old are you?”

“I’m 98,” the man announced proudly.

The doctor just sighed, and looked at him again. Finally he said, “Sir, I’m sorry. I mean, just look at you. You are almost one hundred years old, and you’re complaining that your knee hurts? Well, what did you expect?”

The old man said, “Well, my other knee is 98 years old too, and it doesn’t hurt!”

~~~

Q: What happens when you sing country and western music backwards?

A: You get your wife, job and dog back.

~~~

Jim was having trouble with a toothache, so made an appointment with the dentist. “What do you charge for extracting a tooth?” Jim asked.

“Fifty dollars,” replied the dentist.

“Fifty dollars for only two minutes’ work?” exclaimed Jim.

“Well,” replied the dentist, “if you wish, I can extract it very slowly.”

~~~

I just did a week’s worth of cardio after walking into a spider web.

~~~

Robinson Crusoe style, the shipwrecked golfer made the best of his tiny island. When a cruise liner spotted his distress signals and sent a boat to investigate, the landing party was amazed to find a crude but recognizable nine-hole course which the castaway had played with driftwood woods, whalebone and coral putter and balls carved out of pumice stone.

“Quite a layout,” said the officer to in charge of the rescuers.

“Too kind, it’s very rough and ready,” the goatskin-clad golfer responded. Then he smiled slyly: “I am however, quite proud of the water hazard.”

~~~

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.

~~~

There was a young Scottish lad named Angus who decided to try life in Australia. He found an apartment in a small block and settled in. After a week or two, his mother called from Scotland to see how her son was doing in his new life.

“I’m fine,” Angus said, “But there are some really strange people living here in Australia. One woman cries all day long, another lies on her floor moaning, and there is a guy next door to me who bangs his head on the wall all the time.”

“Well, ma wee laddie,” said his mother, “I suggest you don’t associate with people like that.”

“Oh,” says Angus, “I don’t, Ma’am, I don’t. No, I just stay inside ma apartment all day and night, playing me bagpipes.”

~~~

My uncle Fred was an angry man. He had printed on his tombstone. `What are you looking at?’

~~~

A blonde is taking the driving portion of her driver’s license exam. She handles most of the maneuvers quite well. She has a little trouble parallel parking, however, and winds up a couple of feet from the curb.

“Could you get a little closer?” the examiner asks.

The blonde then unbuckles her seat belt and slides over toward the examiner. “Now what?”

~~~

“In all of living, have much fun and laughter. Life is to be enjoyed, not just endured.”

Gordon B. Hinckley

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

Why not start today

“Live your life without ever having to ask, ‘What if?”

Ken Poirot

a-new-ending

When you get to be my age you learn how true the old adage “time flies” really is. Too many of us just let it keep going doing what we have always done only to find it is too late to make some positive change. I have found that it is not too late to create a happier life but you have to do it to find it.

It is not easy to break old habits but if they lock you in a place you would be better off leaving then why stay. Here is an edited article that I got from Marc Chernoff some time ago that’s worth considering if you want to take the road to a happier life.

7 Things You Really Need to Stop Putting Yourself Through

Pause for a moment and think about how much effort you put into certain routines, habits, situations and people that are not actually benefiting your life in any way. It’s time for a change.  And positive change can happen in YOUR life. As they say, “Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.”

Here are seven crucial things you need to stop putting yourself through:

  1. Stop holding on to negative thoughts from your past. – It’s often our own thinking that hurts us. There’s no reason to imprison yourself.  Don’t think outside the box; think like there is no box.  And never regret your past mistakes, because they gave you strength.  The one who falls and gets up is much stronger than the one who never fell.
  2. Stop attaching yourself to what’s not meant to be. – We all have this idea in our heads of how things are supposed to be, but sadly this is why we end up disappointed. Expect less.  Enjoy more.
  3. Stop letting the same people take advantage of you. – Sometimes people don’t notice the things we do for them until we stop doing them. This is NOT right!  Realize this.  You deserve better.  You deserve to be with people who make you smile – friends who don’t take you for granted – friends who won’t leave you hanging.
  4. Stop hurting yourself by hating people. – As Gandhi once said, “An eye for an eye will only make the whole world blind.” Regardless of how despicable another has acted, never let hate build in your heart.  Fighting hatred with hatred only hurts you more.
  5. Stop blaming others for your troubles. – The extent to which you can achieve your dreams depends on the extent to which you take responsibility for your life. When you blame others for what you’re going through, you deny responsibility – you give others power over that part of your life.
  6. Stop letting fear run your life. – Are you doing what you’re doing out of fear, or love? Think about it.  Every human thought, word and deed is based on fear or love.  Fear is an inner energy that contracts, closes down, draws in, hides, hoards and harms.  When you live through fear, you pull back from life.  Love, on the other hand, is an inner energy that expands, opens up, sends out, reveals, shares and heals.  When you live through love, you open to all that life has to offer with presence and acceptance.
  7. Stop telling yourself that you don’t have what it takes. – As Abraham Lincoln so profoundly said, “We are just about as happy as we make up our minds to be.” Happiness is the result of personal choice and effort.

~~~

“Find your passion and live it.”

Lailah Gifty Akita,

~~~

I don’t know who sent this to me, but I like it, it brings back old memories.

“Fender skirts!” What a great blast from the past! I hadn’t thought about fender skirts in years. When I was a kid, I considered it such a funny term. Made me think of a car in a dress.

Thinking about fender skirts started me thinking about other words that quietly disappear from our language with hardly a notice. Like “curb feelers” and “steering knobs.”

When did we quit calling them “emergency brakes?” At some point “parking brake” became the proper term. But I miss the hint of drama that went with “emergency brake.”

Here’s a phrase I heard all the time in my youth but never anymore – “store-bought.” Of course, just about everything is store-bought these days. But once it was bragging material to have a store-bought dress or a store-bought bag of candy.

“Coast to coast” is a phrase that once held all sorts of excitement and now means almost nothing. Now we take the term “worldwide” for granted. This floors me.

On a smaller scale, “wall-to-wall” was once a magical term in our homes. In the ’50s, everyone covered their hardwood floors with, wow, wall-to-wall carpeting! Today, everyone replaces their wall-to-wall carpeting with hardwood floors. Go figure.

When’s the last time you heard the quaint phrase “in a family way?” It’s hard to imagine that the word “pregnant” was once considered a little too graphic, a little too clinical for use in polite company.

So we had all that talk about stork visits and “being in a family way” or simply “expecting.”

Apparently “brassiere” is a word no longer in usage. I said it the other day and my daughter cackled. I guess it’s just “bra” now. “Unmentionables” probably wouldn’t be understood at all.

It’s hard to recall that this word was once said in a whisper -“divorce.” And no one is called a “divorcee” anymore. Certainly not a “gay divorcee.”

Here’s a word I miss – “percolator.” That was just a fun word to say. And what was it replaced with? “Coffeemaker.” How dull. Mr. Coffee, I blame you for this.

I miss those made-up marketing words that were meant to sound so modern and now sound so retro. Words like “DynaFlow” and “ElectraLuxe.” Introducing the 1963 Admiral TV, now with “SpectraVision!”

Food for thought – Was there a telethon that wiped out lumbago? Nobody complains of that anymore. Maybe that’s what castor oil cured, because I never hear mothers threatening their kids with castor oil anymore.

Some words aren’t gone, but are definitely on the endangered list. The one that grieves me most – “supper.” Save a great word. Invite someone to supper. Discuss fender skirts.

~~~

Let us be thankful for the fools. But for them the rest of us could not succeed.

Mark Twain

~~~

While waiting in line at the bank, a coworker developed a very loud case of hiccups.  By the time he reached the teller’s window, the hiccups seemed to have worsened.

The teller took my friend’s check and proceeded to run a computer verification of his account.  After a minute she looked up from her terminal with a frown and said that she would be unable to cash his check.

“Why not?” my friend asked incredulously.

“I’m sorry, sir,” she replied, “but our computer indicates that you do not have sufficient funds to cover this amount.  As a matter of fact,” she continued, “our records show your account overdrawn in excess of $5000!”

“It CAN’T be!” he cried.  “You have GOT to be kidding!”

“Yeah……I am,” she answered with a big smile, counting out his cash.

“But did you happen to notice that your hiccups are gone?”

~~~

The supermarket is where you spend 30 minutes hunting for instant coffee.

~~~

Walter, who is quite elderly is resting peacefully on the front porch of a nursing home in the country, when he sees a cloud of dust up the road. He watches a farmer approaching, with a wagon. “Good afternoon!” hollers out Walter.

“Afternoon,” says the farmer.

“Where you headed?” asks Walter.

“Town.”

“What do you have in the wagon?” Walter continued.

“Manure.”

“Manure, eh? What do you do with it?”

“I spread it over my strawberries,” the farmer says matter-of-factly.

“Well,” says Walter, “you should come over here for lunch someday. We use whipped cream.”

~~~

“If life is a movie, most of us are watching the boring and talked over! Well, it’s still not too late; drop it.. and start afresh with a new and exciting one. Remember, there’s only one climax waiting to be experienced!”

Syed Arshad

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

I wish you knew her

“If you don’t think every day is a good day, just try missing one.”

Cavett Robert

choosejoy

Yesterday I had breakfast with a friend that always brings joy into my life. I wish I could share her with all of you. Her kindness and warmth always inspires the folks around her as she so often does for me. My friend’s life has not always been easy but no matter what happens she never lets things take her down.

She is the kind of person that we all need. She is someone who holds our hand when we are down and helps us along life’s rough spots when things don’t go well. And you know what; she does not even know she is doing it. She does not offer advice nor has she a book of magic answers all she does is sits with you during the storm letting you know that it too will pass.

Yep. Yesterday was special and I was again reminded that joy is always within our grasp if we just choose to let it in. Here is something I got years ago that reminds me of how I believe my friend thinks.

Live Life with Joy

Certainly you can create your own sacred space, a heaven on a daily basis. It is a matter to feel it, to put value to everything you do. When people just do things to get by, that is what they get. Do everything with passion, even what you think is not worthwhile and needs to be done.

Feel it, live it while you do it but don’t do it to please anybody; do it for you. You deserve the best. Enjoy it without expecting any reward. Put your soul in what you do because what is around you is what you tell the world about who you really are and how far you can get. By doing everything as great as love is, you get not only satisfaction but the transformation of a new you.

Don’t waste your valuable time; keep yourself in a learning mode. Value, appreciate and be happy with what you have. Pursue your dreams and goals; you can do it!

Give, give and give! Take care not only of yourself but also of what you think, feel and your actions. Relinquish to your comfort zone. Take a chance and take time to remember how special, capable, valuable, blessed and loveable you really are. Allow your essence to come out and really live!

May all the joy of the world shower your being, and may you feel the bliss of being alive by blending your essence with the essence of everything you do and everybody you come in contact with.

With the best intentions for a better world,

Written by Eduardo Dominguez

~~~

“I don’t think of all the misery, but of the beauty that still remains.”

Anne Frank

~~~

Top Ten Things Only Women Understand……

  1. Cats’ facial expressions.
  2. The need for the same style of shoes in different colors.
  3. Why bean sprouts aren’t just weeds.
  4. Getting new clothes every year.
  5. Taking a car trip without trying to beat your best time.
  6. The difference between beige, off-white, and eggshell.
  7. Cutting your bangs to make them grow.
  8. Eyelash curlers.
  9. The inaccuracy of every bathroom scale ever made AND, the Number One thing only women understand:
  10. Other Women

~~~

There are several good protections against temptation, but the surest is cowardice.

Mark Twain

~~~

A nerd was walking on campus one day when his friend, another nerd, rode up on an incredible shiny new bicycle. The first nerd was stunned and asked, “Where did you get such a nice bike?”

The second nerd replied, “Well, yesterday I was walking along minding my own business when a beautiful woman rode up to me on this bike.  She threw the bike to the ground, took off all her clothes and said, ‘Take what you want!'”

The second nerd nodded approvingly, “Good choice, the clothes probably wouldn’t have fit.”

~~~

“From your parents you learn love and laughter and how to put one foot before the other. But when books are opened you discover you have wings.”

Helen Hayes

~~~

Rabbi Morris has just resigned and Irving, the synagogue president, goes to visit him.

“Rabbi,” Irving says, “I’ve just heard the news. I’m really sorry that you’ve decided to leave us.”

“Don’t worry,” says Rabbi Morris, “you’ll have nothing to worry about. I’m going to recommend a successor whom I believe will be better than me.”

“But that’s exactly what’s worrying me,” says Irving, “your predecessor told me exactly the same thing.”

~~~

Opportunity may only knock once, but temptation raps for years.

~~~

YOUR CHURCH IS A REDNECK CHURCH IF…

The finance committee refuses to provide funds for the purchase of a chandelier because none of the members knows how to play one.

People ask, when they learn that Jesus fed the 5000, whether the two fish were bass or catfish, and what bait was used to catch ’em.

A member of the church requests to be buried in his 4-wheel-drive truck because “It ain’t never been in a hole it couldn’t git out of.”

High notes on the organ set the dogs on the floor to howling.

People think “rapture” is what you get when you lift something too heavy.

~~~

If a man’s “Captain of his ship”, his wife’s likely the Admiral.

~~~

My friend’s husband always teases her about her lack of interest in household chores.  One day he came home with a gag gift, a refrigerator magnet that read: “Martha Stewart doesn’t live here.”

The next day he came home to find the magnet holding up a slip of paper.  The note read: “Neither does Bob Vila.”

~~~

A priest, a minister and a rabbi walk into a bar.

The bartender looks up and says, “What is this, a joke?”

~~~

She said: My husband is wonderful with our baby daughter, but often he turns to me for advice.  Recently, I was in the shower when he poked his head in to ask, “What should I feed Lily for lunch?”

“That’s up to you,” I replied.  “There’s all kinds of food. Why don’t you pretend I’m not at home?”

A few minutes later, my cell phone rang.  I answered it to hear my husband asking, “Yeah, hi, Honey.  Uh..what should I feed Lily for lunch?”

~~~

The only people who listen to both sides of an argument are the neighbors.

~~~

“If I can see pain in your eyes then share with me your tears. If I can see joy in your eyes then share with me your smile.”

Santosh Kalwar

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

How it goes is up to you

“It`s not how old you are, it`s how you are old.”

Jules Renard

aging

It will be another big day for me. I start mine by joining my wife at the doctor where we will receive some wise council on how we can ensure that we age as gracefully as we can. Aging provides its challenges but can be managed with adjustments, medication and a sense of humor. In our case we also have some older children nearby who make our lives much better than they would be otherwise. So life goes on and still offers us enjoyment.

Here is an article from the Boston Globe that pretty much describes my effort to slide comfortably into the years ahead,

10 tips to help you age gracefully

By Karen Weintraub

When it comes to aging well, most of us already know what we need to do: Exercise, eat right, get a good night’s sleep. Don’t smoke or drink heavily.

Just as important, doctors say, don’t wait to start taking care of yourself. The good news is the same regimen that helps your heart also benefits your brain, mood, metabolism, and even skin. Aging gracefully isn’t rocket science. It just requires energy, stamina and motivation.

  1. Exercise regularly – A minimum of 45 minutes of aerobic exercise, three to four times a week, will keep your heart young while improving your figure, mood and brainpower.
  2. Eat a mostly Mediterranean diet -Eat lots of fruits and vegetables. Cook with olive oil instead of butter.
  3. “Sin” less – Don’t smoke. Limit drinking to no more than one drink a day for women, two for men.
  4. Sleep – Getting less than 6.5 hours at night puts you at risk for a host of physical and mental problems.
  5. Take care of mental health – Middle age is time to get rid of emotional baggage that stresses you out.
  6. Control blood pressure – High blood pressure today sets you up for dementia later.
  7. Eat your vitamins – The best way to get vitamins and minerals is from a well-balanced diet.
  8. Keep friends close – People who maintain broad social networks as they age have higher scores on intelligence tests and lower rates of dementia, studies show.
  9. Learn something new every day – The more you challenge your brain, the better it performs, studies suggest. Better to learn varied things, and participate in group activities.
  10. Avoid diabetes – Uncontrolled diabetes can thin the brain’s cortex, increasing risk of Alzheimer’s and other forms of dementia. Again, diet and exercise are the best prevention.

~~~

Aging can be fun if you lay back and enjoy it.

Clint Eastwood

~~~

Diary Entries of a Young Woman on a Cruise Ship:

Dear Diary,

MONDAY: What a wonderful cruise this is going to be! I felt singularly honored this evening. The Captain asked me to dine at his table.

TUESDAY: I spent the entire afternoon on the bridge with the Captain.

WEDNESDAY: The Captain made proposals to me unbecoming an officer and a gentleman.

THURSDAY: Tonight the Captain threatened to sink the ship if I do not give in to his indecent proposals!

FRIDAY: This afternoon I saved 1600 lives.

~~~

Teenagers express their burning desires to be different by dressing exactly alike.

~~~

Defendant: Judge, I want you to appoint me another lawyer.

Judge: And why is that?

Defendant: Because the Public Defender isn’t interested in my case.

Judge (to Public Defender): Do you have any comments on the defendant’s motion?

Public Defender: I’m sorry, Your Honor. I wasn’t listening.

~~~

“I like to pick up hitchhikers. When they get in the car I say, ‘Put on your seat belt. I want to try something. I saw it once in a cartoon, but I think I can do it.'”

Steven Wright

~~~

Myron and Molly make a rare appearance in synagogue. It’s probably true to say that they are not the most religious of Jews. In fact they only go to shul two or three times every year – and this is one of those days.

At the end of the service, Myron shakes the Rabbi’s hand and says, “Molly and I both thoroughly enjoyed your service today, Rabbi.”

The Rabbi replies, “It’s nice of you to say so, Myron, so why don’t you and Molly come here more often?”

“It’s difficult,” replies Myron, “but at least we keep the Ten Commandments.”

“That’s really good to hear,” says the Rabbi.

“Yes,” says Myron proudly, “Sadie keeps 6 of them and I keep the other 4.”

~~~

People count up the faults of those who are keeping them waiting.

French Proverb

~~~

My friend asked his father-in-law, a crop duster, how his day had gone.  “It was the worst day of my life,” replied the man. “This morning I was up in my plane dusting a field when I nicked a power line and damaged the wing on the plane.

When I got back to the office, my boss chewed me out.  Then the guy from the FAA chewed me out.

“On my way home, I stopped at a bar and was handed a warm beer.

So I yelled at the bartender, “Don’t you have any cold beer?”

“The bartender said, ‘Sorry, but we’ve been out of electricity all day ever since some idiot crop-duster hit a power line down the road.'”

~~~

“I plan to put off reading ‘Lolita’ for six years — until she’s eighteen.”

Groucho Marx

~~~

John, a neighbor of mine, was annoyed because he had to search for his newspaper each morning after the paperboy tossed it. Often he would find it, covered with dirt, under the car in the gravel driveway.

Then one day the paperboy’s mother mentioned that her son’s ambition was to play professional basketball.

John had an idea.  When he got home, he attached a basketball hoop to a post on the front porch.  Sure enough, the next morning there was a resounding “plunk” as the newspaper sailed through the hoop and landed by the door.

John never had to search for his paper again.

~~~

There is a fountain of youth: it is your mind, your talents, the creativity you bring to your life and the lives of people you love. When you learn to tap this source, you will truly have defeated age.    

Sophia Loren

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

Live and have fun

Cherish all your happy moments: they make a fine cushion for old age

Christopher Morley

happy-life

Here we go again, a new week. My week as usual will be an abridged version of all I use to do but will include things I want to do.

Some of us get so busy doing what we think we must do that we have no time to do what we should do. I hope you are not of those who leaves little time to have fun and to take advantage of what life offers in the way of happiness. I am just glad that I learned years ago that doing more of the same all the time just isn’t worth it.

Here is a story I like, I hope you will too.

Living life and having fun

A house becomes a home when you can write ‘I love you’ on the furniture. I can’t tell you how many countless hours that I have spent cleaning. I used to spend at least 8 hours every weekend making sure things were just perfect – ‘in case someone came over.’ Then I realized one day that no-one came over; they were all out living life and having fun!

Now, when people visit, I find no need to explain the condition of my home. They are more interested in hearing about the things I’ve been doing while I was away living life and having fun. If you haven’t quite figured this out as yet, please heed this advice.

Life is short, so enjoy it! Dust if you must, but wouldn’t it be better to paint a picture or write a letter, bake a cake or plant a seed, or even ponder the difference between want and need? Dust if you must, but there’s not much time, with rivers to swim and mountains to climb, music to hear and books to read, friends to cherish and life to lead. Dust if you must, but the worlds out there with the sun in your eyes, the wind in your hair, a flutter of snow, a shower of rain. This day will not come around again.

Dust if you must, but bear in mind, old age will come and it’s not kind. And when you go – and go you must, you, yourself will make more dust! It’s not what you gather, but what you scatter that tells what kind of life you have lived … and remember, a layer of dust protects the wood beneath it.

Author Unknown

~~~

Human beings, by changing the inner attitudes of their minds, can change the outer aspects of their lives

William James

~~~

From Our answering machine:

  • My wife and I can’t come to the phone right now, but if you’ll leave your name and number, we’ll get back to you as soon as we’re finished.
  • Hi, I’m not home right now but my answering machine is, so you can talk to it instead. Wait for the beep.
  • Hi! Ray’s answering machine is broken. This is his refrigerator. >Please speak very slowly, and I’ll stick your message to myself with one of these magnets.
  • Hello, you are talking to a machine. I am capable of receiving messages. My owners do not need siding, windows, or a hot tub, and their carpets are clean. They give to charity through their office and do not need their picture taken. If you’re still with me, leave your name and number and they will get back to you.
  • This is not an answering machine — this is a telepathic thought-recording device. After the tone, think about your name, your reason for calling and a number where I can reach you, and I’ll think about returning your call.
  • Hi. I am probably home. I’m just avoiding someone I don’t like. Leave me a message, and if I don’t call back, it’s you.
  • Hi, this is Ray. I’m sorry I can’t answer the phone right now. Leave a message, and then wait by your phone until I call you back.
  • If you are a burglar, then we’re probably at home cleaning our weapons right now and can’t come to the phone. Otherwise, we probably aren’t home and it’s safe to leave us a message.
  • Please leave a message. However, you have the right to remain silent. Everything you say will be recorded and will be used by us.

~~~

“The trouble with facts is that there are so many of them.”

Samuel McChord Crothers

~~~

Everyone had weighed in, and our diet-workshop leader began her lecture on the week’s topic – the problems of dining out. She talked about alternatives, such as requesting diet sodas and dressings, and having meat broiled instead of fried. Finally she turned the question over to the group for discussion. “What is the greatest problem you encounter when going out to eat?”

Replied one woman quickly, “Running into you!”

~~~

“Saying what we think gives us a wider conversational range than saying what we know.”

Cullen Hightower

~~~

Miriam was dying and on her deathbed, she gave final instructions to her husband Sidney.

“Sidney, you’ve been so good to me all these years. I know you never even thought about another woman. But now that I’m going, I want you to marry again as soon as possible and I want you to give your new wife all my expensive clothes.”

“I can’t do that, darling,” Sidney said. “You’re a size 16 and she’s only a 10.”

~~~

“All the world’s a stage and most of us are desperately unrehearsed.”

Sean O’Casey

~~~

My friend’s mother is a proper Southern lady and a passionate gardener who spends hours outside with her plants. In her neighborhood, where she has lived most of her life, no one has fences and every yard is open to the next.

Recently one of her longtime neighbors, an elderly man, moved away. “Are you going to miss him?” my friend asked.

“Actually I’m relieved,” her mother replied. “Now I can bend over.”

~~~

“The real measure of your wealth is how much you’d be worth if you lost all your money.”

Unknown

~~~

My job is in the Aerospace industry and it’s always been a challenge to explain just what kind of work I do.

At one gathering, I tried several unsuccessful attempted explanations before deciding to be as generic as possible. When the subject came up while I was talking with a group of guys, I replied simply, “Defense Contractor.”

The men nodded and as the conversation went on, I silently declared victory to myself. Then one of them turned to me and asked, “So, what do you put up mainly? Chain link?”

~~~

People who soar, are those who refuse to sit back and wish things would change

Charles R. Swindoll

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

Enjoy your trip

In the end, it’s not the years in your life that count. It’s the life in your years.

Abraham Lincoln

love-life

I had the good fortune many years ago to meet an executive secretary at Morton Salt in Chicago. We only met a few times back I have not seen her since then. But like so many of you Judy and I have stayed in touch ever since.

I really do appreciate the fact that she has offered her friendship and she will always be special to me. One of the gifts she gives me is to occasionally send me a copy of something she appreciates and what she sent me yesterday really hit home. It accurately defines what life is all about and how we might live it. Here is what she sent.

Our Life Train

At birth we boarded the train and met our parents, and we believe they will always travel on our side.

However, at some station our parents will step down from the train, leaving us on this journey alone.

As time goes by, other people will board the train; and they will be significant i.e. our siblings, friends, children, and even the love of your life.

Many will step down and leave a permanent vacuum.

Others will go so unnoticed that we don’t realize they vacated their seats.

This train ride will be full of joy, sorrow, fantasy, expectations, hellos, goodbyes, and farewells.

Success consists of having a good relationship with all passengers requiring that we give the best of ourselves.

The mystery to everyone is: We do not know at which station we ourselves will step down.

So, we must live in the best way, love, forgive, and offer the best of who we are.

It is important to do this because when the time comes for us to step down and leave our seat empty we should leave behind beautiful memories for those who will continue to travel on the train of life.

I wish you a joyful journey on the train of life. Reap success and give lots of love. More importantly, thank God for the journey.

Lastly, I thank you for being one of the passengers on my train.  (By the way, I am not planning to get off the train anytime soon but if I do, just remember I am glad you were part of my journey.)

~~~

I have found that if you love life, life will love you back.

Arthur Rubinstein

~~~

If you can start the day without caffeine or pep pills,

If you can be cheerful, ignoring aches and pains,

If you can resist complaining and boring people with your troubles,

If you can eat the same food everyday and be grateful for it,

If you can understand when loved ones are too busy to give you time,

If you can overlook when people take things out on you when, through no fault of yours, something goes wrong,

If you can take criticism and blame without resentment,

If you can face the world without lies and deceit,

If you can conquer tension without medical help,

If you can relax without liquor,

If you can sleep without the aid of drugs,

If you can do all these things,

THEN YOU ARE PROBABLY THE FAMILY DOG

~~~

“A man is known by the company he avoids.”

~~~

For weeks a six-year old lad kept telling his first-grade teacher about the baby brother or sister that was expected at his house. One day the mother allowed the boy to feel the movements of the unborn child. The six-year old was obviously impressed, but made no comment. Furthermore, he stopped telling his teacher about the impending event. The teacher finally sat the boy on her lap and said, “Tommy,  whatever has become of that baby brother or  sister you were expecting at home?”

Tommy burst into tears and confessed,  “I think Mommy ate it!”

~~~

If you like gambling, the worst thing you can do is bring your spouse with you to the casino. If you lose, they get mad. If you win, they want half!

~~~

She does at:

Age 8: Looks at herself and sees: Cinderella/Sleeping Beauty.

Age 15: Looks at herself and sees: Cinderella/Sleeping Beauty/Cheerleader, or if she is PMS’ing: sees: Pimples/UGLY (“Mom, I can’t go to school looking like this!”)

Age 20: Looks at herself and sees: “too fat/too thin, too short/too tall, too straight/too curly” – but decides she’s going out anyway.

Age 30: Looks at herself and sees: “too fat/too thin, too short/too tall, too straight/too curly” – but decides she doesn’t have time to fix it so she’s going out anyway.

Age 40: Looks at herself and sees: “too fat/too thin, too short/too tall, too straight/too curly” – but says, “At least, I’m clean” and goes out anyway.

Age 50: Looks at herself and sees I am” – and goes wherever she wants to.

Age 60: Looks at herself and reminds herself of all the people who can’t even see themselves in the mirror anymore. …goes out and conquers the world.

Age 70: Looks at herself and sees wisdom, laughter and ability – goes out and enjoys life.

Age 80: Doesn’t bother to look. Just puts on a red hat and goes out to participate in the world.

Age 90: Can’t see and doesn’t worry about it!

~~~

“I don’t want any yes-men around me. I want everybody to tell me the truth even if it costs them their jobs.”

Samuel Goldwyn

~~~

I was addressing some mail when I noticed that my card file of frequently used addresses was missing. Thinking it must have fallen from my typing table into the wastebasket, I called the office janitor. “I’ve lost my Rolodex,” I told him. “It may have been picked up with the trash. Is there any way you could find it?” He said he would conduct a search. When the janitor informed me he had searched every trash container for my Rolodex, with no luck, I thanked him for his trouble.

As I left work that evening, the janitor met me at the door. “Good night,” he said smiling apologetically. “Sorry I couldn’t find your watch.”

~~~

“The Law of Reality” Never get into fights with ugly people, they have nothing to lose.

~~~

The Store

Two nuns were shopping in a food store and happened to be passing the beer and liquor section. One asks the other if she would like a beer. The other nun answered that would be good, but that she would be queasy about purchasing it. The first nun said that she would handle it and picked up a six pack and took it to the cashier. The cashier had a surprised look and the first nun said that it was for washing their hair. The cashier without blinking an eye, reached under the counter and put a package of pretzels in the bag with the beer saying, “Here, don’t forget the curlers.”

~~~

Life is a song – sing it. Life is a game – play it. Life is a challenge – meet it. Life is a dream – realize it. Life is a sacrifice – offer it. Life is love – enjoy it.

Sai Baba

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

We can do better

Public sentiment is everything. With public sentiment nothing can fail; without it nothing can succeed. He who molds public sentiment goes deeper than he who enacts statutes or decisions possible or impossible to execute.

Abraham Lincoln

lets-do-better

Yesterday tired me out and today has me needing to go to two early meetings and then on an errand to a suburb. I need to reduce my things-to-do-today list so I am again dipping into the archives for a Daily from yesteryear.

Ray’s Daily first published on October 20, 2005

If you are like I am you meet people every day that are against lots of different things. For example many complain about the educational system, but when asked what they are for, you find that they have not looked for something better. I hear so much of that about education and other issues that I am thrilled when I meet somebody who is for something and can tell me why.

I go to meeting after meeting dominated by critics. Few spend time studying the issues or have tried to identify practical solutions. I participated in an international affairs meeting where a major problem was identified and the causes explored. I said I thought a major cause we had not identified was us and our silence. It’s like the comic character Pogo said, I have met the enemy and they are us.

This morning I was reading an article that talked about how politics has changed in America it discussed how much has changed since Lincoln’s day. Our short attention spans, our concentration on our self-interest, and how we spend our time has made it too easy to manipulate how we feel. Politicians these days have learned that they win elections by raising enough money to hire professionals to make them look good, public relations people to make them sound good, and experts to tell them where our attitudes and prejudices lie so they can tell us what we want to hear. They have found it way too easy to manipulate an unstudied population through what borders on propaganda.

Unfortunately too many elections are won by those raise the most money. It is too bad that many politicians spend so much time raising money and pandering to contributors that they don’t have enough time to spend on their jobs. From my experience the real power often rests with the congressional staffs on all but the most controversial issues. That happens because there are too many things on an elected official’s plate for them to handle personally. On many if not most issues the professional staff recommends and the member does as they suggest. However on a number of major issues, committee staffer’s opinions differ widely from the public. When major bills end up in the hands of a House/Senate conference committee it is the staffers who do most of the horse trading, they decide what stays and what goes on all but the most controversial elements of the legislation. Mostly these are good people, but you can’t blame them for their opinions if all they hear is one side of any story. That happens when we stand mute on the issues we care about and only say what we are against and let someone else provide solutions.

So when we are worried about what is wrong we need to remember that things may be that way because too many of us failed to watch what was going on and then saying something about it. OK, sorry about the harangue, I don’t know why I do that sometime, maybe I do because if we don’t say something who will?

~~~

The peace and welfare of this and coming generations of Americans will be secure only as we cling to the watchword of true patriotism: “Our country — when right to be kept right; when wrong to be put right.”

Carl Schurz

~~~

Gary and Keith were chatting by the office coffee maker. “I had the most bizarre dream the night before last,” Gary declared, “All night there was just this huge glowing number 5. It was made of gold and sparkled with diamonds.”

Keith raised an eyebrow and responded, “Interesting. So what’d ya do?”

“The first thing that I did in the morning was to grab the daily racing digest and look up the fifth race and the #5 horse in the fifth race was named ‘The Fifth Element.'”

Keith started grinning.

“I was sure that this was a sign,” explained Gary, “so…

– I ate five bowls of cereal for breakfast and drank five cups of coffee

– I went for a five mile jog to clear my head

– I took a five minute shower

– I dressed in the fifth suit I found in my closet

– I sat in my car for five minutes before starting it up

– I drove to the racetrack and parked in the fifth stall in the fifth row

– I entered through the fifth admissions gate

– I bought five programs

– I went to the fifth betting window and bet $555 on the fifth horse in the fifth race

– I went and sat in the fifth row of the bleachers making sure there were five people sitting on either side of me. I settled in and waited for the race to start.”

“Well,” wondered Keith, “Did the horse win?”

Gary smiled, “Of course not, he came in fifth.”

~~~

If you can’t get a lawyer who knows the law, get one who knows the judge.

~~~

Josh had always been a big fan of Walt Disney.  He saw every film that the Disney Studios put out.  So it was no surprise when he headed to Disneyland looking for a job as a tour guide.  And his interview went something like this:

Interviewer, “So why would you like to work for us?”

Josh, “I’ve been a big fan for many years.  I reckon that I know as much about your characters as anyone.  I’d make an exceptionally good tour guide.”

Interviewer, “Tell you what.  If you can answer 3 questions, I won’t just hire you, I’ll give you the job of Head Tour Guide.”

Josh, “Sounds great!”

Interviewer, “First Question: Who is Mickey Mouse’s girlfriend?”

Josh, “Minnie Mouse.” Interviewer, Second Question: Name our 2 most famous dogs.” Josh, “Pluto and Goofy.” Interviewer, “Very Good.  Speaking of dogs, I assume you saw the movie 101 Dalmatians?”

Josh, “Sure did.”

Interviewer, “Okay, name them.”

~~~

Don’t look back. Something might be gaining on you.

Satchel Paige

~~~

“Thanks for the harmonica you gave me for Christmas,” little Joshua said to his uncle the first time he saw him after the holidays. “It’s the best Christmas present I ever got.”

“Hey, that’s great,” said his uncle. “Do you know how to play it?”

“Oh, I don’t play it,” the little fellow said. “Mom gives me a dollar a day not to play it during the day and my dad gives me five dollars a week not to play it at night.”

~~~

“God help the man who won’t marry until he finds a perfect woman, and God help him still more if he finds her.”

~~~

My eccentric neighbor proudly showed me what appeared to be a dog. “It’s unique,” he explained, “part dog and part bull, and it cost me a thousand!”

“Wow! Which part is bull?” I asked.

He replied, “The part about the thousand.”

~~~

The only really good advice that your Jewish mother ever gave you was: “Go! You might meet somebody!”

~~~

Sam is shouting at his wife, Becky. “Oh no, not another new dress and accessories. Just where do you think I am going to get the money to pay for it all?”

Becky replies, “I may be a lot of different things to many people, but I’m certainly not inquisitive!”

~~~

A popular government without popular information, or the means of acquiring it,

is but a prologue to a farce or a tragedy, or perhaps both.

James Madison

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

Thank You Maya

Don’t get older just to get wiser. If you get older, you will be wiser, I believe that – if you dare. But get older because it’s fun!

Maya Angelou

maya-angelou

I hope you are going to have a great day today. I have an early dentist appointment and am then scheduled to attend a couple of lectures. I may end up substituting a nap for one of them though in order to be alert enough to understand the one I do attend. But whatever I end up doing I plan on making my day a good one.

Sharing my thoughts with you each day just fuels my positive outlook on how we can enjoy our lives. I find that I benefit from the wisdom of others and like to share what I find with you. Today I would like to offer you some of the thoughts of Maya Angelou. She is a personal favorite of mine.

I’ve learned…

I’ve learned that no matter what happens, or how bad it seems today, life does go on, and it will be better tomorrow.

I’ve learned that regardless of your relationship with your parents, you’ll miss them when they’re gone from your life.

I’ve learned that making a living is not the same thing as making a life.

I’ve learned that life sometimes gives you a second chance.

I’ve learned that whenever I decide something with an open heart, I usually make the right decision.

I’ve learned that even when I have pains, I don’t have to be one.

I’ve learned that every day you should reach out and touch someone. People love a warm hug, or just a friendly pat on the back.

I’ve learned that I still have a lot to learn.

I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did but people will never forget how you made them feel.

~~~

My great hope is to laugh as much as I cry; to get my work done and try to love somebody and have the courage to accept the love in return.

Maya Angelou

~~~

Our family held a reunion when my mother was 88 years old, with grandchildren and great-grandchildren attending. The talk turned to honeymoons, and my three daughters began to tell about their trips to Las Vegas, Chicago and Niagara Falls.

One of my daughters turned to my mother. “Gramma, where did you go on your honeymoon?” she asked.

Mother never hesitated. “Upstairs!” she said.

~~~

She said: I have the most marvelous recipe for meat loaf!

All I have to do is mention it to my husband and he says, “Let’s eat out!”

~~~

“Things That Make Me Crazy”

I found myself nodding my head at more than one of the things on this list…

* You have to try on a pair of sunglasses with that stupid little plastic thing in the middle of them.

* The elevator stops on every floor and nobody gets on or off.

* There’s always a car riding your tail when you’re slowing down to find an address.

* The tiny red string on the Band-Aid wrapper never works for you.

* You can never put anything back in a box the way it came.

* You wash a garment with a tissue in the pocket and your entire laundry comes out covered with lint.

* You set the alarm on your digital clock for 7pm instead of 7am.

* The radio station doesn’t tell you who sang that song.

* You rub on hand cream and can’t turn the bathroom doorknob to get out.

* You can’t look up the correct spelling of a word in the dictionary because you don’t know how to spell it.

* You had that pen in your hand only a second ago and now you can’t find it.

* You reach under the table to pick something off the floor and smash your head on the way up.

~~~

It doesn’t work to leap a twenty-foot chasm in two ten-foot jumps.

American proverb

~~~

I pulled into a crowded parking lot and rolled down the car windows to make sure my Labrador retriever had fresh air.

She was stretched out on the back seat, and I wanted to impress upon her that she must remain there.

I walked to the curb backward, pointing my finger at the car and saying emphatically, “Now you stay. Do you hear me? Stay!”

The driver of a nearby car gave me a startled look.

“I don’t know about you,” he said incredulously. “But I usually just put my car in park.”

~~~

Practice makes perfect, but if nobody’s perfect, why practice?

~~~

Derek was walking through the woods when he came to a river. He walked long the bank for a while looking for a way to get across.

After a while he spotted someone else on the opposite bank, so he called out, “How do I get to the other side?”

The other person yelled back, “You ARE on the other side!”

~~~

You’re just jealous because the voices only talk to me.

~~~

She said: The bank where I work had just installed its first 24- hour cash machine. I encouraged an elderly gentleman to take an application for the new plastic identification cards, explaining that he would be able to get cash any time of day or night.

He declined, saying, “Lady, anything I’d need money for that late at night I shouldn’t be doing.”

~~~

“I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places.”

Henny Youngman

~~~

NEW INVENTIONS BY BLONDES

— Glow in the dark sunglasses

— A book on how to read.

— Inflatable dart boards

— A dictionary index.

— Powdered water

— Waterproof tea bags

— Zero proof alcohol

— Reuseable ice cubes

— Skinless bananas

— Do-it-yourself road map

— An all white flag

— Rolls Royce pickup truck

~~~

I’m convinced of this: Good done anywhere is good done everywhere. For a change, start by speaking to people rather than walking by them like they’re stones that don’t matter. As long as you’re breathing, it’s never too late to do some good.

Maya Angelou

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

Thanks Everyone

Friends are the siblings God never gave us.

Mencius

james-kiberd-ray

James Kiberd and Ray

I heard the other day from my two favorite New York actors, James Kiberd and Susan Keith-Kiberd. They said they would be coming through Indianapolis today and offered to stop for a short visit. Unfortunately I am tied up all day and had to let them know I couldn’t do it.

This was a big disappointment to me because they are two of the best people I know. I met them about twenty years ago when I would occasionally travel with James promoting a UNICEF/Kiwanis global public health project. Besides James being one of Americas most popular TV personalities he also used his artistic talent to paint a picture that helped in our fundraising efforts. I met Susan the first time when she attended a college level Kiwanis convention with James, she was also a popular TV actress and the two of them raised funds for our project as kids bid to dance with them.

I have not seen them since our UNICEF days but we have kept in touch over the years via the internet and occasional phone calls. Yesterday I wrote in the Daily how important it is that we maintain active friendships as we age. While I never get to see the Kiberds these days I feel that we are even closer than we once were. It is like with so many of you, I seldom see you anymore but the internet keeps you in my heart.

Here is what the Mayo Clinic has to say about the importance of friendships.

What are the benefits of friendships?

Good friends are good for your health. Friends can help you celebrate good times and provide support during bad times. Friends prevent loneliness and give you a chance to offer needed companionship, too. Friends can also:

  • Increase your sense of belonging and purpose
  • Boost your happiness and reduce your stress
  • Improve your self-confidence and self-worth
  • Help you cope with traumas, such as divorce, serious illness, job loss or the death of a loved one
  • Encourage you to change or avoid unhealthy lifestyle habits, such as excessive drinking or lack of exercise

Friends also play a significant role in promoting your overall health. Adults with strong social support have a reduced risk of many significant health problems, including depression, high blood pressure and an unhealthy body mass index (BMI). Studies have even found that older adults with a rich social life are likely to live longer than their peers with fewer connections.

~~~

I cannot even imagine where I would be today were it not for that handful of friends who have given me a heart full of joy. Let’s face it, friends make life a lot more fun.

Charles R. Swindoll

~~~

She said:

I used to work for a large company; they often tried to do special things for us to make work a little more enjoyable. Below is a series of memos I found on my desk one week. Thought I would pass then on…..

Casual Day Memo No. 1: Effective immediately, the company is adopting Fridays as Casual Day so that employees may express their diversity.

Memo No. 2: Spandex and leather micro-miniskirts are not appropriate attire for Casual Day.  Neither are string ties, rodeo belt buckles or moccasins.

Memo No. 3: Casual Day refers to dress only, not attitude.  When planning Friday’s wardrobe, remember image is a key to our success.

Memo No. 4: A seminar on how to dress for Casual Day will be held at 4 p.m., Friday in the cafeteria.  Fashion show to follow.  Attendance is mandatory.

Memo No. 5: As an outgrowth of Friday’s seminar, a 14-member Casual Day Task Force has been appointed to prepare guidelines for proper dress.

Memo No. 6: The Casual Day Task Force has completed a 30-page manual. A copy of “Relaxing Dress Without Relaxing Company Standards” has been mailed to each employee.  Please review the chapter “You Are What You Wear” and consult the “home casual” versus “business casual” checklist before leaving for work each Friday.  If you have doubts about the appropriateness of an item of clothing, contact your CDTF representative before 7 a.m. on Friday.

Memo No. 7: Because of lack of participation, Casual Day has been discontinued, effective immediately!

~~~

Our only security is our ability to change.

John Lilly

~~~

My brother, a strict vegetarian, travels abroad for long periods on business. When he got back from Europe one time, he called our parents’ home and told Dad he was about to pay them an unexpected visit.

Dad hung up. “The prodigal son is returning!” he called to my mother. “Kill the fatted zucchini!”

~~~

“Be careful of your thoughts; they may become words at any moment.”

Ira Gassen

~~~

She said: At the company water cooler, I bragged about my children’s world travels: one son was teaching in Bolivia, another was working in southern Italy, and my daughter was completing a yearlong research project in India.

One co-worker’s quip, however, stopped me short.  “What is it about you,” he asked, “that makes your kids want to get so far away?”

~~~

Nothing is impossible if you don’t have to do it yourself.

~~~

Tired of having to balance his wife Cindy’s checkbook, Mike made a deal with her; he would only look at it after she had spent a few hours trying to wrestle it into shape.  Only then would he lend his expertise.

The following night, after spending hours poring over stubs and figures, Cindy said proudly,

“There!  I’ve done it!  I made it balance!”

Impressed, Mike came over to take a look.

“Let’s see…mortgage 550.00, electricity 70.50, phone 35.00.”

His brow wrinkled as he read the last entry.

“It says here ESP, 615.00.  What is that?”

“Oh,” said. “That means…..       ‘Error Someplace’ ”

~~~

We must believe in free will. We have no choice.

~~~

After a long life of unselfish service, Father John O’Malley died and went to heaven. St. Peter met him at the gate and said: “John, you did such a wonderful job for us on earth, we’d like to do something special for you. You name it; it’s yours.”

John thought for a moment and said: “I’d like a private audience with the Holy Mother.” St. Peter told him it would be arranged.

On the appointed day, St. Peter escorted John to the Holy Mother’s sanctuary. John went before Her, knelt, and said: “Holy Mother, I’ve always looked to You for guidance, and You have granted me peace and serenity through some difficult times. But I have one question that has nagged me during my whole time on earth. In all the paintings that were done of you, and in all the sculptures that were carved of you, you always looked so sad. Why is that?”

Mary thought for a moment, pursing her lips. She said: “I always wanted a girl.”

~~~

Surely I deserve some kind of recognition for all the bad things I haven’t done.

~~~

Little Morris, 4 years old, walked down the beach, and as he did, he spied a matronly woman sitting under a beach umbrella on the sand. He walked up to her and asked, “Are you Jewish?”

“Yes.” she replied.

“Do you know the Ten Commandments?”

She nodded her head, “Yes.”

“Do you pray often?” the boy asked next, and again she  answered, “Yes.”

Do you keep Kosher ?, Morris asked.

“I do.” said the elderly lady.

With that he asked his final question, “Will you hold my dollar while I go swimming?”

~~~

True friendship multiplies the good in life and divides its evils. Strive to have friends, for life without friends is like life on a desert island… to find one real friend in a lifetime is good fortune; to keep him is a blessing.

Baltasar Gracian

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

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