Ray's musings and humor

Archive for February, 2016

A better Ray is back

If you cannot be a poet, be the poem.

David Carradine

! 00000 Be-Yourself-Brand

I am back and much better than I was last week. My spine Doctor’s steroid shot has helped a lot I am able to walk without a lot of pain. I don’t have the results of my brain scan (EEG) but they did verify that I am not brainless. Then on Thursday they replaced the lens in my right eye and I have been amazed at the results, I can see better now with no glasses then I did with glasses. The healing process will take a few more weeks but it all looks good.

So now I can start to adventure back out into an active world. I just need to decide what I can and will do. Here is an edited article that has meaning as I plan what’s next. While he talks about employment the same principles apply to other activities. In my case I need to avoid committing to things I won’t do well.

Be Where You Are

Byron Pulsifer

Do you dream and hope to be someplace else than where you are today?  If you do, you are not fully engaged in the here and now. You are losing an opportunity to be the best you can be right here and right now.  You need to act and be fully committed to where you are for the present is the place that all action takes place and not someplace else.  Your commitment to how you act, how you do things, and whether you are successful depends on everything in the present.

It is not wrong to have a set goal that can take you to other places in life whether that is a new career, or to a new business, it really doesn’t matter. But, what does matter is that you have to understand that what you do right now, in this day, will matter to what happens next.

Success here is the way you will demonstrate success there wherever that may be. There are no exceptions. It boils down to this: if you cannot work to your full capacity and do the absolute best job you can right now where you are you probably will not do the best job you can in whatever it is that you hope to end up.

Over the past few years, I have spoken to many people about their desires to have a different job or career. Some of these people were young adults and some were in their middle years. The common element became clear after several conversations and that element was that each person felt that they were in the wrong job and simply marking time doing a half-hearted job with just enough effort to keep their position. They all felt desperate to do something more worthwhile but were all at a loss about what they could do about their current situation. To each, there was absolutely no reason to expend more energy to their job.

In these situations, they all were guilty of demeaning their own current job to the point where they did not feel good about what they did, about their effort, or about themselves. The more they continued to work, the more they became depressed with barely enough energy to get out of bed in the morning to go to work. They were all in a downward spiral that certainly would not lead to feeling better nor with enough energy to look for other available options. What each person needed was a little resurrection of their own self-esteem so that the more they put into their current job, the more they would have the inner strength and capacity to develop a new plan to seek a new career. You have to feel good about yourself before you are able to step forward otherwise you are stepping backwards.

There is a lot to be accomplished where you are and if you cannot see it, you are missing the fact that there is much more to life.  It is something like thinking that the grass is greener on the other side of the fence – not always the case. So, eat here until it is all gone and you are ready to move to a new pasture.

~~~

Knowing who you are takes pressure off. Just be you & let the chips fall where they may. Might surprise you to see who picks up the pieces.

~~~

The shipwrecked mariner had spent several years on a deserted island. Then one morning he was thrilled to see a ship offshore and a smaller vessel pulling out toward him.

When the boat grounded on the beach, the officer in charge handed the marooned sailor a bundle of newspapers and told him, “The captain said to read through these and let us know if you still want to be rescued.”

~~~

TEAMWORK…means never having to take all the blame yourself.

~~~

“Things We Learn From Children”

  • There is no such thing as child-proofing your house.
  • If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with roller blades, they can ignite.
  • A 4 year-old’s voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant.
  • If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan the motor is not strong enough to rotate a 42 pound boy wearing pound puppy underwear and a superman cape.
  • It is strong enough however to spread paint on all four walls of a 20 by 20 foot room.
  • Baseballs make marks on ceilings.
  • You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is on.
  • When using the ceiling fan as a bat you have to throw the ball up a few times before you get a hit.
  • A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way.
  • When you hear the toilet flush and the words “Uh-oh,” it’s already too late.
  • If you use a waterbed as home plate while wearing baseball shoes it does not leak — it explodes.
  • A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 square foot house 4 inches deep.
  • Legos will pass through the digestive tract of a four year old. Duplos will not.
  • Play Dough and Microwave should never be used in the same sentence.
  • Super glue is forever.

~~~

My idea of cleaning the house is sweeping the floor with a glance.

~~~

A stalwart Vermont farmer bought some land that was still just as it had been before the Pilgrims landed.  He dug up hundreds of stones and built a fence; cut down trees to create a clearing; built a house and a small barn; cleared land for pasture, dug a well and over several years just generally worked his fingers to the bone in creating a small, neat, productive farm.

Eventually his pastor came out for a visit and marvelled rather fulsomely, and at great length, at all that “you and God have done together.”

“Eh,” the farmer said dubiously.  “Ya shoulda seen the place when God ran it on his own.”

~~~

A snooze button is a poor substitute for no alarm clock at all.

~~~

Haircuts–The difference between men and women

Women’s version:

Woman 2:  Oh!  You got a haircut!  That’s so cute!

Woman 1:  Do you think so?  I wasn’t sure when she gave me the mirror.  I mean, you don’t think it’s too fluffy looking?

Woman 2:  Oh Gosh, no!  No, it’s perfect.  I’d love to get my hair cut like that, but I think my face is too wide. I’m pretty much stuck with this stuff I think.

Woman 1:  Are you serious?  I think your face is adorable. And you could easily get one of those layer cuts–that would look so cute I think.  I was actually going to do that except that I was afraid it would accent my long neck.

Woman 2:  Oh–that’s funny!  I would love to have your neck!  Anything to take attention away from this two-by-four I have for a shoulder line.

Woman 1:  Are you kidding?  I know girls that would love to have your shoulders.  Everything drapes so well on you. I mean, look at my arms–se how short they are?  If I had your shoulders I  could get clothes to fit me so much easier.

Men’s version:

Man 2:  Haircut?

Man 1:  Yeah.

~~~

Learn to… be what you are, and learn to resign with a good grace all that you are not.

Henri-Frédéric Amiel

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

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Thanks Doc

“If the only prayer you say in your life is ‘thank you,’ that would suffice.”

Meister Eckhart

! 00000 Be-Thankful-Everyday

Hi everyone. I don’t know about you but my world has gotten a lot better. For the first time in a long time I can walk and stand with only minor pain and even that stands a good chance of getting better. My good fortune is the result of the steroid injection into my spine. The success bodes well for the future and probably will rule out spine surgery.

So today I am back at the Y restarting my workout regimen and soon I will restart strength training where I can rebuild my leg muscles. I as should be able to become more active in the weeks ahead.

My rebuilding is not over as tomorrow I will be in surgery getting a new lens put in my left eye. I hope you will understand when you don’t find a Daily as I will close down the press while I am under the knife. If all goes well I’ll be back on Friday.

I am truly grateful for all the medical care givers that keep putting me back together. They have made my life much better than it would have been without them. I am glad that I have so many opportunities to thank them.

Here excerpts from an article by Marelisa Fabrega that I agree with.w Gratitude Can Cha

Gratitude means thankfulness, counting your blessings, noticing simple pleasures, and acknowledging everything that you receive. It means learning to live your life as if everything were a miracle, and being aware on a continuous basis of how much you’ve been given. Gratitude shifts your focus from what your life lacks to the abundance that is already present. In addition, behavioral and psychological research has shown the surprising life improvements that can stem from the practice of gratitude. Giving thanks makes people happier and more resilient, it strengthens relationships, it improves health, and it reduces stress. Day’s Gifts

People tend to take for granted the good that is already present in their lives. There’s a gratitude exercise that instructs that you should imagine losing some of the things that you take for granted, such as your home, your ability to see or hear, your ability to walk, or anything that currently gives you comfort. Then imagine getting each of these things back, one by one, and consider how grateful you would be for each and every one. In addition, you need to start finding joy in the small things instead of holding out for big achievements—such as getting the promotion, having a comfortable nest egg saved up, getting married, having the baby, and so on–before allowing yourself to feel gratitude and joy.

A common method to develop the practice of gratitude is to keep a gratitude journal, a concept that was made famous by Sarah Ban Breathnach’s book “Simple Abundance Journal of Gratitude”. This exercise basically consists of writing down every day a list of three to ten things for which you are grateful; you can do this first thing in the morning or before going to bed at night. Another exercise you can try is to write a gratitude letter to a person who has exerted a positive influence in your life but whom you have not properly thanked. Some experts suggest that you set up a meeting with this person and read the letter to them face to face.

Once you become oriented toward looking for things to be grateful for, you will find that you begin to appreciate simple pleasures and things that you previously took for granted. Gratitude should not be just a reaction to getting what you want, but an all-the-time gratitude, the kind where you notice the little things and where you constantly look for the good even in unpleasant situations. Today, start bringing gratitude to your experiences, instead of waiting for a positive experience in order to feel grateful; in this way, you’ll be on your way toward becoming a master of gratitude.

~~~

“Gratitude can transform common days into thanksgivings, turn routine jobs into joy, and change ordinary opportunities into blessings.

William Arthur Ward

~~~

I sat there waiting for my doctor’s partner to make her way through the file that contained my very extensive medical history. After she finished all 17 pages, she looked at me and said, “You look better in person than you do on paper.”

~~~

She said: Inside me lives a skinny woman crying to get out. But I can usually shut the bitch up with cookies.

~~~

A customer called the airline’s reservation office to pay for his ticket with a credit card.  The reservation specialist asked him,

“Would you please spell the name as it appears on the card, sir?”

The customer carefully replied, “V-I-S-A.”

~~~

There are no more hours in a bad day than in a good one!

~~~

A Sunday school teacher asked her second graders if anyone knew another name for God. She was picturing answers like ‘Lord’ or ‘Almighty’.

After a long moment of silence a little boy raised his hand and said, “Howard.”

“Howard?” replied the confused teacher.

“You know,” continued the boy, “Howard be thy name.”

~~~

“Why does a woman work ten years to change a man’s habits and then complain that he’s not the man she married?”

Barbara Streisand

~~~

Even though I was an engineering student, chemistry was a required course in my day. The Professor, on the first day of class, asked everyone to name the most outstanding contribution chemistry had made to society. When my turn came, I answered, “Blondes!”

~~~

Stress is when you wake up screaming and then you realize you haven’t fallen asleep yet.

~~~

On Mother’s Day the whole family got together for a big dinner and afterward, when Mom started to clean up, the kids said to her, “Don’t bother with those dishes, Mom.“ Today is Mother’s Day, you can always do them tomorrow.”

~~~

A genius is any man who can adjust the thermostat to please his wife.

~~~

My nursing colleague was preparing an intravenous line for a 15-year-old male patient. The bedside phone rang, and the boy’s mother reached over to pick it up. After talking for a few minutes, the mother held the phone aside and said, “Your father wants to know if you have any cute nurses.” The boy gazed at the nurse, who had the needle poised above his arm, ready for insertion. “Tell him,” he replied, “they’re absolutely gorgeous.”

~~~

There is not a more pleasing exercise of the mind than gratitude. It is accompanied with such an inward satisfaction that the duty is sufficiently rewarded by the performance.

Joseph Addison

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

Happy?

Be happy for this moment. This moment is your life.

Omar Khayyam

! 00000 be happy.jpg

My spine doctor gave me a steroid shot in my spine to hopefully reduce pressure on a nerve. If it doesn’t work then they may have to do surgery. I am optimistic that I will be relatively pain free in a day or so.

Today is my day with the brain folks to make sure that all is well up there. When they are done I will have documentation that there is something there and that ought to quash the brainless rumors.

I am a little worn out so let’s see what was in the Daily eleven years ago.

Ray’s Daily first published on February 23, 2005

I worry about those who seem to always be unhappy. Some often tell me that others make them unhappy, I don’t think anyone makes us unhappy, we just let them do it. I am sure you have run into those who seem to revel in their unhappiness or at least are resigned to it. Maybe they should follow the advice of Tara D. Miller from Edmonton, Alberta. She suggests these four common sense ways to create a happy moment in each day:

  • Number One: The world of true wealth: friendship. Sunny and Cher had it right, “I got you to hold my hand, and I got you to understand. I got you to walk with me, and I got you to talk with me. I got you babe.” This song is true: everything feels better when there is someone there to help you through it. Try to feel bad when you are hugging your best friend, kissing your spouse, or remembering that funny thing you did when you were at that place, you know, the time when everyone was laughing! Go out and spend some time with your friends! If that is not possible, call an old friend on the phone.
  • Number Two: Be egocentric. The word egocentric is often negatively identified with being self-centered. Focusing on personal needs, rather then focusing on everyone and everything else. Feeding yourself so that you have something to give back to others. Reading something for sheer enjoyment, or watch a movie that you picked out. Getting away from the pressures of family and into a hot bath, or out on a trail. Centering on your own personal well-being. Truthfully, has anyone ever walked away from a spa and said: “All that relaxation has totally ruined my day”? Spend some time focusing on what brings you pleasure! Remember to relax!
  • Number Three: Be others focused. Have you ever graciously let someone cut in front of you on the freeway? A small task, but if you have done it, did you notice the sunlight dancing in your chest? Blessing others can be just that simple. Slowing down to notice other people’s needs and trying to meet them. Giving your empty cans to a transient person, listening to someone talk about their day, buying someone a coffee, or writing someone a note (maybe even a love note!). Remind yourself to perform an act of kindness!
  • Number Four: Get out there and do something! Too often life becomes a rut instead of an adventure. Sinking into the routine of life, and forgetting to experience life. Go to a concert! See how many samples you can eat in Costco before you are asked to leave! Sing in your car! Explore the countryside, or plan to go somewhere exotic! Learn a language, or how to play the guitar! Or, remember that thing you used to do, but you stopped because you got too old? Go out and do it! Stop being boring! Entertain yourself! Choose your own adventure!

She goes on to tell us that happiness is in us to enjoy! It is something that can be forgotten about, or remembered in each day. No one person, no one thing, or activity will make you happy. Happiness is something that needs to be chosen. It is knit into each person; the hard part is slowing down to experience it. It is not a cabin by the lake that is to be visited only on the weekends. It is the glow of your own heart. You can decide how brightly and how often happiness shines inside of you. Being happy in each day is something that you choose for yourself.

Happiness is not something that can be found, it is something that is created and refreshed from the inside out. Maybe the lure of Never-Never land has ceased to exist in the adult heart, but maybe we can choose to remember those happy thoughts moment by moment in each day.

So let others just try to make me unhappy if they wish, I choose happiness instead, and I am not going to let others take it away from me. Ray

~~~

What a wonderful life I’ve had! I only wish I’d realized it sooner.

Colette

~~~

The following quotes were allegedly taken from actual medical records as dictated by physicians: (maybe even yours?)

~ By the time he was admitted, his rapid heart had stopped and he was feeling better.

~ On the second day, the knee was better and on the third day it had completely disappeared.

~ The patient has been depressed ever since she began seeing me in 1983.

~ Patient was released to outpatient department without dressing.

~ Discharge status: Alive but without permission.

~ The patient refused an autopsy.

~ The patient expired on the floor uneventfully.

~ The patient’s medical history has been remarkably insignificant with only a 40 pound weight gain in the past three days.

~ She slipped on the ice and apparently her legs went in separate directions in early December.

~ The patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.

~ She is numb from the toes down.

~ The skin was moist and dry.

~ When she fainted, her eyes rolled around the floor.

~~~

“The pessimist sees difficulty in every opportunity. The optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.”

Winston Churchill

~~~

This Marine drill instructor, completely frazzled by the ineptitude of his recruits, burst into a blue streak of swearing hot enough to blister paint.  He broke off suddenly when he noticed one of the recruits had been talking in ranks.

“WHAT WAS THAT YOU SAID, RECRUIT??” the drill sergeant hollered.

In a quivering voice, the recruit replied, “I said, to myself, Drill Sergeant Sir, ‘if that sucker thinks I’m going to stand here and take his mess . . . well, he’s certainly an uncanny judge of character.”

~~~

First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then you win.

Mahatma Gandhi

~~~

The minister was preoccupied with thoughts of how he was going to ask the congregation to come up with more money than they were expecting for repairs to the church building. Therefore, he was annoyed to find that the regular organist was sick and a substitute had been brought in at the last minute. The substitute wanted to know what to play. “Here’s a copy of the service,” he said impatiently. “But, you’ll have to think of something to play after I make the announcement about the finances.”

During the service, the minister paused and said, “Brothers and Sisters, we are in great difficulty; the roof repairs cost twice as much as we expected and we need $4,000 more. Any of you who can pledge $100 or more, please stand up.” At that moment, the substitute organist played “The Star Spangled Banner.”

And that is how the substitute became the regular organist!

~~~

In theory, there is no difference between theory and practice. But, in practice, there is.

~~~

Dear Sir,

Since taking your body building course, I now have a 44 inch chest, a 32 inch waist, 17 inch biceps and an 18 inch neck. I feel absolutely marvelous but at the same time, I do feel that my chances of marriage are spoiled.

Yours faithfully,

Mary Goldberg

~~~

Let us be grateful to people who make us happy, they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom.

Marcel Proust

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

I hope your week will be as good as mine

“What we see depends mainly on what we look for.”

John Lubbock

! 00000 Bright-Side

This is a big week for me. I see my Spine Doctor today, Neurologists tomorrow and eye surgery on Thursday. I am looking forward to some positive results.

You have heard me before talk about the value of expecting good things to happen and in my case they usually do. I also have talked about how much I prefer folks who can see the flowers over those that only see the weeds. Because that is my attitude I like the following article that I think is right on.

Look for the Good and You Will Find It

By Kimber Simpkins

Have you ever noticed how as human beings, we tend to go negative? Looking out into the world, we see the crumpled fast food bag in the street and the torn curtain in the window. Looking into the mirror, we see the pores and dark circles under our eyes. We see the freckles and miss the dimple, or we hate the dimple and miss the smile. Our eyes focus in on what’s wrong. I’ve noticed it’s hard to undo this tendency in myself, though sometimes the veil drops suddenly, and I can see the beauty of the world around me.

Many years ago, a friend and I made a three-day visit to the Polish city where we were to live for a year while we taught English. Arriving on the train, I was struck by the torn metal siding in the station and the crumbling rust of the ancient stair railings; as we walked along the sidewalk, how the entire city seemed one blocky stamped-out Soviet-era apartment building after the next.

Neither of us spoke, but I felt sure my roommate’s thoughts mirrored my own: This was where we were going to live? This worn foot sole of a town was going to be our home for a year? Just as my mind headed in the direction of I don’t think I can live here, a tiny bird flew down a foot or so in front of my shoes, hopping a few inches here and there to nibble the tops of a tuft of grass poking out of the broken concrete.

I let my suitcase bump to a stop and watched. The bright saturated green of the grass, the pale orange stripe on the bird’s beak, the angle of sunlight against the cracked sidewalk… it was beautiful. And at that moment my heart gave a hopeful thump. There was beauty here, too. I only needed to look for it.

As humans, we have a built-in bias to see what’s not working, what needs fixing, what doesn’t measure up. In general, it’s not bad to see the negative… we avoid falling into pits by looking out for potholes. But seeing only the negative results in what I call “paper towel tube vision.”

When you look through the empty cardboard paper towel tube, you only see whatever shows through the little circle at the end of it, and nothing else. This is what we’re seeing when we see only the flaws on our cheeks and only the crumpled coffee cups on the curbs of life. We see whatever appears in that little circle and lose all perspective.

Seeing the good doesn’t mean we don’t see the bad, too. It means we throw away the paper towel tube and let our eyes take in what we don’t like and invite ourselves to see what’s good there, too. We let ourselves see it all, the big panoramic view that acknowledges that we are more than any mistake or flaw or misdeed. Imagine letting your mind unfold like a vast, exquisite map laid out on a table. Seeing the bigger picture can be an awesome way to see yourself with more love.

Make a habit of looking for the good. Catch yourself looking at the world—or at yourself—with a narrow, negative view. Then step back mentally and spread out your awareness. See with the eyes of your heart. Look for something that’s working, something sweet, something lovely, something that opens you up.

Look for the good in people, even people you wouldn’t want to sit over dinner with. Look for the good in the mirror. Let looking for the good become a new default for you, and give yourself credit when you’re able to hold whatever’s happening with that big perspective and big heart.

~~~

Your attitude is like a box of crayons that color your world. Constantly color your picture gray, and your picture will always be bleak. Try adding some bright colors to the picture by including humor, and your picture begins to lighten up.

Allen Klein

~~~

She said:

While attending college, I worked evenings at a retail store.  On slow nights my co-worker Susan would often sing along with the radio while we did paperwork or restocked merchandise. One evening as the manager was leaving, I expressed my concern to him about our safety, being two women working alone at night.

“Oh, you’ll be fine,” he said, waving of his hand.

“If you see anybody who looks suspicious, just warn him that Susan knows karaoke.”

~~~

A true friend is someone who reaches for your hand and touches your heart.

~~~

At an Easter mass, at which some young ladies were to take their final vows to become nuns, the presiding bishop noticed two rabbis enter the church just before the mass began. They were seated at the back of the sanctuary and insisted on sitting on the right side of the center aisle. The bishop wondered why they had come but didn’t have time to inquire before the mass began.

When it came time for some announcements, his curiosity got the best of him. He announced that he was delighted to see two rabbis in their midst at the mass but was curious as to why they were present at this occasion where the young ladies were to become the “Brides of Christ.”

The eldest of the rabbis slowly rose to his feet and explained, “Family of the Groom.”

~~~

The guy put on a set of snow tires; Spring came and they all melted.

Jim Weir

~~~

Not that my wife’s the jealous type or anything, but one day at work, I had taken this temp who was filling in for my secretary to lunch in gratitude for an outstanding job on a very difficult project.

As luck would have it, there was my wife waiting in the office for my return.  The temp, who was truly a ravishing beauty said, “Oh, Mrs. Moore, I’m so happy to meet you. I’m your husband’s new secretary.”

Within a single heart beat, my wife quietly intoned, “OH? Really?  WERE you???”

~~~

People want the front of the bus, the back of the church, and the center of attention.

~~~

A Love Story

I will seek and find you . . .

I shall take you to bed and have my way with you . . .

I will make you ache, shake & sweat until you moan & groan.

I will make you beg for mercy, beg for me to stop.

I will exhaust you to the point that you will be relieved when I’m finished with you.

And, when I am finished, you will be weak for days.

All my love,

The Flu

Now, get your mind out of the gutter and go get your flu shot!!!!

~~~

Life is full of uncertainties…or I could be wrong about that?

~~~

I was browsing in a souvenir shop when the man next to me struck up a conversation.

Just as he was telling me that his wife was getting carried away with her shopping, a brief power shortage caused the lights to flicker overhead.

“Ah,” he sighed loudly…. that must he her checking out now.”

~~~

The shortest distance between two points is usually under construction.

Wayne H.

~~~

Miriam had just finished her fish dinner. She was, however, not at all happy with it, so she called over the waiter. “I’ve tasted fresher fish,” said Miriam.

“Not in here,” replied the waiter.

~~~

“Consult not your fears but your hopes and your dreams. Think not about your frustrations, but about your unfulfilled potential. Concern yourself not with what you tried and failed in, but with what it is still possible for you to do.”

Pope John Paul XXIII

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

I am working on my comeback

I can’t change the direction of the wind, but I can adjust my sails to always reach my destination.

Jimmy Dean

! 00000 I can

I have been concerned lately that I am getting too use to not doing much. I love the daily naps and find it easy to avoid activity while my body is rebuilding. I know the inactivity is not helping at all but I also know that I won’t be able to do some of the things I did before I got into my eighties.

So after next week’s medical interventions I will begin anew to get out and about. I look forward to leaving my easy chair and returning to the world. As I build my new to do list I want to concentrate on what I can do and not waste time regretting what I no longer can do.

Here is a story that makes sense to me, it might to you also.

Knock the “t” Off theThe “Can’t”

Neil Eskelin

Recently I took a sheet of paper and divided it into two columns: “Yes People,” and “No People.” Then I thought about individuals I knew and wrote their names in the appropriate column. What a shock it was to see the length of the “No” list.

 These were the people who heard someone say, “You can’t do that!” and they believed it. Now they were saying, “It can’t be done!” and their negativity was affecting the lives of others.

 If your friends made such a list right now, under which heading would they write your name? Do they see you as enthusiastic, affirmative and optimistic? Or do they believe you see more problems than solutions?

 It’s time to knock the “t” off the “can’t.” I like the words of author Frank Hughes: “I will say this about being an optimist; even when things don’t turn out well, you are certain they will get better.”

 You are only a decision away from responding with hope instead of fear, with encouragement instead of criticism, with belief instead of despair. It’s your choice!

~~~

If you think you can do it, you can.

John Burroughs

~~~

Thibodeaux’s two kids are in the same class at school, and the teacher had the class write reports about their pets. After the reports were all turned in, the teacher called one of the Thibodeau youngsters up to her desk and scolded him. “This report on ‘My Dog’ is exactly, word for word, the same as your brother’s. Did you copy from him?”

He replies, “Mais, no Ma’am, it’s about de same dog!”

~~~

She said: I disagree with my psychiatrist’s assertion that I’m depressed because I have a serotonin imbalance. I’m pretty sure the real reason is: My life sucks!

~~~

NEW OFFICE POLICY

Dress Code:

You are advised to come to work dressed according to your salary. If we see you wearing Prada shoes and carrying a Gucci bag, we will assume you are doing well financially and therefore do not need a raise.

If you dress poorly, you need to learn to manage your money better, so that you may buy nicer clothes, and therefore you do not need a raise.

If you dress just right, you are right where you need to be and therefore you do not need a raise.

Sick Days:

We will no longer accept a doctor’s statement as proof of sickness. If You are able to go to the doctor; you are able to come to work.

Personal Days:

Each employee will receive 104 personal days a year. They are called Saturdays & Sundays.

Bereavement Leave:

This is no excuse for missing work. There is nothing you can do for dead friends, relatives or co-workers. Every effort should be made to have non-employees attend the funeral arrangements. In rare cases where employee involvement is necessary; the funeral should be scheduled in The late afternoon. We will be glad to allow you to work through your lunch hour and subsequently leave one hour early.

Bathroom Breaks:

Entirely too much time is being spent in the toilet. There is now a strict three-minute time limit in the stalls. At the end of three minutes, an alarm will sound, the toilet paper roll will retract, the stall door will open, and a picture will be taken. After your second offense, your picture will be posted on the company bulletin board under The “Chronic Offenders” category. Anyone caught smiling in the picture will be sectioned under the company’s mental health policy.

Lunch Break:

Skinny people get 30 minutes for lunch, as they need to eat more, so that they can look healthy.

Normal size people get 15 minutes for lunch to get a balanced meal to maintain their average figure.

Chubby people get 5 minutes for lunch, because that’s all the time needed to drink a Slim-Fast.

Thank you for your loyalty to our company. We are here to provide a positive employment experience. Therefore, all questions, comments, concerns, complaints, frustrations, irritations, aggravations, insinuations, allegations, accusations, contemplations, consternation and input should be directed elsewhere.

The Management

~~~

“Those are my principles. If you don’t like them I have others.”

Groucho Marx

~~~

While making rounds, a doctor points out an X-ray to a group of medical students. “As you can see,” she says, “the patient limps because his left fibula and tibia are radically arched. Michael, what would you do in a case like this”?

“Well,” ponders the student, “I suppose I’d limp too.”

~~~

Even in a time of elephantine vanity and greed, one never has to look far to see the campfires of gentle people.

Garrison Keillor

~~~

She said: I’m embarrassed to admit it, but I’ve tried online dating. I haven’t met anyone in person yet because the guys always stop writing before we can set up a date. I don’t know what it is. Perhaps that handsome athletic thirty-two-year-old doctor was lying about his age, got grounded, and lost his internet privileges. Or maybe it was something I said, “I’d love to meet for coffee. Thursday’s are best for me. That’s when my neighbor picks up my four kids from my three previous marriages.”

~~~

Man often becomes what he believes himself to be. If I keep on saying to myself that I cannot do a certain thing, it is possible that I may end by really becoming incapable of doing it. On the contrary, if I have the belief that i can do it, I shall surely acquire the capacity to do it even if I may not have it at the beginning.

Mahatma Gandhi

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

 

Ray’s Away Today

It’s not stress that kills us, it is our reaction to it.

Hans Selye

! 00000 10 Jord

If today’s Daily seems a little dusty it is because it is eleven years old. I hope you’re OK with that.

Ray’s Daily

February 18, 2005

OK, which ever one of you prayed that I could solve my e-mail problems, thanks it worked. I think this happens to me periodically just to test my ability to handle stress. I was fortunate enough yesterday to break up my foul mood by my friend Sandra taking me to a world class seafood restaurant for lunch.

Believe it or not we have made all the arrangements for our November cruise. So far there are six couples in our party, two from my UNIVAC days, two old friends, my favorite in-laws, and of course us. We fly into Orlando on Saturday, limo to the Cocoa Beach Radisson Resort (Got a super $109 rate), transported by the hotel to the ship on Sunday, go to our super priced Deluxe Balcony cabin, and then enjoy seven days of fun and frolic. This will be a special cruise since my pal Robin booked 50 cabins and has all kinds of special stuff planned. In case I decide to stay at sea I want you to know how much I have enjoyed your friendship.

So I am out of the doldrums and am ready to enjoy the weekend. One of the things I will be waiting to hear is the results of my granddaughter’s gymnastic competition in Fort Lauderdale this weekend. When I was 10 I got to ride a street car in Chicago, last weekend she was competing in Chicago, this weekend in Florida. But not to worry if I play my cards right I may be able to go to a local movie.

So have fun one and all, we are back in business.

~~~

Getting there isn’t half the fun – it’s all the fun.

Robert Townsend

~~~

Carolyn shares more of her wisdom.

Subject:  My Philosophy on Life!!!

I don’t repeat gossip, so listen carefully the first time.

God, if I can’t be skinny, let all my friends be fat.

My idea of cleaning the house is sweeping the floor with a glance. I cleaned my house yesterday, sure wish you could have seen it.

If you don’t like my attitude, call 1-800-Who Cares.

If it’s true we are what we eat, I am either fast, cheap, or easy.

Discover Wildlife! Have Kids!

“Genuine Antique Person,” Been there, done that, can’t remember!

Our policy is to always blame the computer.

Your secrets are safe with me and all my friends – none of us can remember.

I am not cheap, but we can negotiate.

Okay! I love you! Now can we eat?

You know you’re getting old when you stop to think and forget to start again.

I love to give homemade gifts, … umm, which one of the kids would you like?

I have a million dollar figure — but it’s all loose change!

By the time you find greener pastures, you can’t climb the fence!

~~~

“I was raised to sense what someone wanted me to be and be that kind of person.

It took me a long time not to judge myself through someone else’s eyes.”

Sally Field

I really believe this is one of life’s great secrets-Ray

~~~

There was once a general store in central Kansas back around 1900. The owner was an elderly man who went to church for a long time. The store always had those two or three “older gentlemen” that you always see on the front porch talking about “the war” or how it used to be. Anyway, this certain storeowner had the habit of quoting Scripture every time he made a transaction, and it was always a different verse.

It got to where the old men on the porch came in every time a customer showed up just to hear what the verse was going to be. Well, one day, a Texan came in and inquired about the rug that was hanging on the wall. The man asked about the price of the rug, and the owner told him $400. But, the owner and the old men all knew that the true worth was about $200. So the Texan thought it over and said, “I’ll take it!”

He bought the rug and left the store.

The old men stared at the owner in anticipation of what possible Scripture could follow such a dishonest act. The owner said, “He was a stranger, and I took him in.”

~~~

I am becoming increasingly worried that there isn’t enough anxiety in my life.

~~~

Flying to Los Angeles from San Francisco the other day, a passenger noticed that the “Fasten Seat Belts” sign was kept lit during the whole journey, although the flight was a particularly smooth one.

Just before landing, he asked the flight attendant about it.

“Well,” she explained, “up front there are 17 University of California girls going to Los Angeles for the weekend. In back, there are 25 Coast Guard enlistees…..

So…..what would you do?”

~~~

In my day, we didn’t have water.  We had to smash together our own hydrogen and oxygen atoms.

~~~

When Suzy got home, she told her dad that she got a 100 in school. Her dad told her to go sit down and tell him all about it.

She said, “Well, I got a 20 in math, a 30 in science, and a 50 in spelling!

~~~

When my wife had to rush to the hospital unexpectedly, she asked me to bring her a few items from home. One item on her list was “comfortable underwear.” Worried I’d make the wrong choice, I asked, “How will I know which ones to pick?” “Hold them up and imagine them on me,” she answered. “If you smile, put them back.”

~~~

“Nice guys finish last, but we get to sleep in.”

Evan Davis

~~~

One morning a man comes into the church on crutches. He stops in front of the holy water and splashed some of it on both of his legs, then throws away his crutches.  An alter boy witnessed the scene and ran into the rectory to tell the priest what he’d just seen. Without batting an eye, the priest said, “Son, you’ve just witnessed a miracle. Tell me, where is this man?”

“Flat on his behind over by the holy water, Father.”

~~~

A father is asked by his friend, “Has your son decided what he wants to be when he grows up?”

“Yes, he wants to be a garbage collector,” replied the boy’s father.

His friend thought for a moment and responded, “That’s a rather strange ambition to have for a career.”

“Well,” said the boy’s father, “he thinks that garbage collectors only work on Tuesdays!”

~~~

I like the dreams for the future better than the history of the past.

Thomas Jefferson

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

The best people I know

“No one has ever become poor by giving.”

Anne Frank

! 00000 attraction

I was thinking the other day that some of the most interesting and warmest folks I know I met while volunteering. The thing these people have in common is the joy they get out of helping others. They require no recognition from others for what they do for they get their rewards from the act of their kindness.

There is a glow that surrounds those who quietly care so much for others that they devote much of their time doing good work. These are not the complainers or angry naysayers that we see every day; these are the folks who don’t complain, they are too busy helping to solve problems to spend their time blaming others.

I have had the good fortune in my lifetime to meet many people in high places, most good people, but few as good as those I have met quietly serving in the trenches. It is in that spirit that I would like to share this story with you today.

Coffee On The Wall

Author Unknown

I sat with my friend in a well-known coffee shop in a neighboring town of Venice, Italy, the city of lights and water. As we enjoyed our coffee, a man entered and sat at an empty table beside us. He called the waiter and placed his order saying, “Two cups of coffee, one of them there on the wall.”

We heard this order with rather interest and observed that he was served with one cup of coffee but he paid for two. When he left, the waiter put a piece of paper on the wall saying “A Cup of Coffee”.

While we were still there, two other men entered and ordered three cups of coffee, two on the table and one on the wall. They had two cups of coffee but paid for three and left. This time also, the waiter did the same; he put a piece of paper on the wall saying, “A Cup of Coffee”. It was something unique and perplexing for us. We finished our coffee, paid the bill and left.

After a few days, we had a chance to go to this coffee shop again. While we were enjoying our coffee, a man poorly dressed entered. As he seated himself, he looked at the wall and said, “One cup of coffee from the wall.” The waiter served coffee to this man with the customary respect and dignity. The man had his coffee and left without paying. We were amazed to watch all this, as the waiter took off a piece of paper from the wall and threw it in the trash bin. Now it was no surprise for us – the matter was very clear. The great respect for the needy shown by the inhabitants of this town made our eyes well up in tears.

Ponder upon the need of what this man wanted. He enters the coffee shop without having to lower his self-esteem… he has no need to ask for a free cup of coffee… without asking or knowing about the one who is giving this cup of coffee to him… he only looked at the wall, placed an order for himself, enjoyed his coffee and left.

A truly beautiful thought. Probably the most beautiful wall you may ever see anywhere!

~~~

“Love is not patronizing and charity isn’t about pity, it is about love. Charity and love are the same — with charity you give love, so don’t just give money but reach out your hand instead.”

Mother Teresa

~~~

The Michaels family owned a small farm in Canada, just yards away from the North Dakota border. Their land had been the subject of a minor dispute between the United States and Canada for generations. Mrs. Michaels, who had just celebrated her ninetieth birthday, lived on the farm with her son and three grandchildren.

One day, her son came into her room holding a letter.

“I just got some news, Mom,” he said. “The government has come to an agreement with the people in Washington. They’ve decided that our land is really part of the United States. We have the right to approve or disapprove of the agreement. What do you think?”

“What do I think?” his mother said. “Jump at it! Call them right now and tell them we accept! I don’t think I could stand another one of those Canadian winters!”

~~~

HOW WOULD YOU MAKE A MARRIAGE WORK?

Tell your wife that she looks pretty, even if she looks like a truck.

Ricky, age 10

~~~

She said:

The other day my grandson asked me how I felt about being old. I was taken aback, for I do not think of myself as old. Old age, I decided, is a gift. I am now, probably for the first time in my life, the person I have always wanted to be. I would never trade my amazing friends, my wonderful life, my loving family for less gray hair or a flatter belly. As I’ve aged, I’ve become my own friend.

I am entitled to overeat, to be messy, to be extravagant. I have seen too many dear friends leave this world too soon; before they understood the great freedom that comes with aging. I will dance with myself to those wonderful tunes of the 50’s, and if I, at the same time, wish to weep over a lost love, I will.

I know I am sometimes forgetful. But there again, some of life is just as well forgotten, and I eventually remember the important things.

I am so blessed to have lived long enough to have my hair turn gray, and to have my youthful laughs be forever etched into deep grooves on my face. I care less about what other people think. I don’t question myself anymore. I’ve even earned the right to be wrong.

So, to answer your question, I like being old. It has set me free. I like the person I have become. I am not going to live forever, but while I am still here, I will not waste time lamenting what could have been, or worrying about what will be.

~~~

Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.

Jim Carrey

~~~

Nine year old Joey was asked by  his mother what he had learned at Sunday school.

“Well, Mom, our teacher told us how God sent Moses behind enemy lines on a rescue mission to lead the Israelites out of Egypt. “When he got to the Red Sea, he had his engineers build a pontoon bridge and all the people walked across safely. “Then he used his walkie-talkie to radio headquarters for reinforcements. They sent bombers to blow up the bridge and all the Israelites were saved.”

“Now, Joey, is that really what your teacher taught you?” his mother asked.

“Well, no. But if I told it the way the teacher did, you’d never believe it!”

~~~

Be who you are and say what you feel. Because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.

Dr. Seuss

~~~

Bella was terribly upset. Her fiance, Marvin, had been to a clinical psychologist, and the results were not entirely consoling. She said to her mother, “I’m not sure the marriage would be happy, Ma. The psychologist says Marvin tests out to have a pronounced Oedipus complex.”

Her mother shrugged and said, “Don’t listen to that fancy talk. I’ve watched Marvin, and I tell you he’s all right. Look how he loves his mother.”

~~~

“I don’t want to live in the kind of world where we don’t look out for each other. Not just the people that are close to us, but anybody who needs a helping hand. I can’t change the way anybody else thinks, or what they choose to do, but I can do my bit.”

Charles de Lint

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

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