Ray's musings and humor

Archive for July, 2013

They will come if we give them what they want

This City is what it is because our citizens are what they are.

Plato

Citizens

I shared with you the other day the importance I placed on getting our fellow citizens engaged in the effort to make our community a better place. The key word is “engaged,” which means to me someone who is actively and continually involved. Far too often we find folks who might help choosing not to do so while those trying to lead the charge complain that people don’t do what they should do.

In my experience what needs to be done is to look at what we are offering those who could help us. I run into frustrated leaders all the time that bemoan the fact that people signup for a good cause and then don’t show-up. Yet seldom do these same leaders stop and review what they do and how they do it. When people choose not to participate it is because we have not made it beneficial for them to do so. People have so many options these days that they can choose to do something else with their time.

Here are some thoughts on how we can make what we offer more attractive:

  1. Make sure everyone is appreciated who offers to help. Never take volunteers for granted.
  2. Make sure everyone is given something that they can do.
  3. Include the rank and file in the decision making process.
  4. Don’t bring people to meetings just to report to them how well the organization and its leaders are doing. Invite them to come and participate in developing strategies and tactics that they can help implement.
  5. Report successes and challenges always making sure the role played by all is recognized.
  6. Share enthusiasm for the cause and the joy of joint accomplishment.

There is more but for me when I cannot rally people I have to look at myself and not them. How many times have you heard people say things like “I want to do something to give back to the community” and then walk away because we did not give them any way to do so. So clearly communicate, sincerely appreciate and by all means give those who care something to do.

Here are some tips on how to engage the public from the Case Foundation that I think are worthy:

 

To develop and adopt citizen-centered approaches, the service and civic engagement field should:

  • Shift the focus. Instead of asking how to encourage civic engagement, consider the best ways to give people opportunities to define and solve problems themselves.
  • Involve all community institutions. Engage faith-based organizations, schools, businesses, and government agencies in providing public deliberation and problem-solving for all citizens.
  • Use technology to create a new kind of “public commons.” Leverage technology’s power to encourage, facilitate, and increase citizen-centered dialogue, deliberation, organizing, and action around a wide variety of issues.
  • Explore and create new mechanisms. Don’t assume that traditional venues like town hall meetings are sufficient to truly get different types of people to engage and share perspectives. Look at where people are already interacting (such as neighborhood organizations, schools, and workplaces) and consider other approaches, structures, and venues.
  • Conduct rigorous research about what works and why. While considerable research has been conducted on the levels of volunteering, voting, community service, and political participation, there is a need for more evaluation about the motivating forces behind such behaviors — and what approaches are effectively solving community problems.
  • Help communities move from deliberation to action. Deliberation should serve as a means to the end of communities being able to take action collectively in ways that reap results they can see and experience.

~~~

The health of a democratic society may be measured by the quality of functions performed by private citizens.

Alexis de Tocqueville

~~~

Flying home after visiting her daughter in England, she arranged to have her husband meet her plane at the Vancouver, B.C. airport. This meant a stop at the border crossing between the United States and Canada, where her husband was asked: “What is your reason for entering the country?” and “How long are you planning to stay?”

He replied that he was picking his wife up at the airport after her trip to England. Without missing a beat, the guard asked two more questions in the same businesslike tone: “Is the house clean?” and “Are there fresh flowers on the table?”

~~~

I’ve learned that ultimately, ‘takers’ lose and ‘givers’ win.

~~~

A four-year-old boy and his father went to the beach. There was a dead seagull lying on the sand. The boy asked his father, ”Dad, what happened to the birdie?” His dad told him, ”Son, the bird died and went to heaven.”

Then the boy asked, ”Did God throw him back down?”

~~~

Remember the good old days when people killed time by working instead of by taking coffee breaks?

~~~

Ron just got a new sports car and was out for a drive when he cut off a truck driver. The trucker motioned for Ron to pull over. When he did, the driver got out of his truck and pulled a piece of chalk from his pocket. He drew a circle on the road and told Ron to stand in the circle and not move. He then went to Ron’s new car and cut up the leather seats. When the truck driver turned around Ron had a slight grin on his face.

“Oh, you think that’s funny?” the trucker asked, “Watch this.” He got a baseball bat out of his truck and broke every window in the car. When he turned and looked Ron had a smile on his face. This drove the driver into a rage. He got his knife back out and sliced all the tires. Now Ron was laughing. The truck driver really started to lose it. He went back to his truck and got a can of gas, poured it on the sports car and set it on fire. He turned around and Ron was laughing so hard he almost fell down.

“What’s so funny?” The truck driver asked him.

Ron replied, “When you weren’t looking, I stepped outside the circle 4 times.”

~~~

There are no new sins….the old ones just get more publicity.

~~~

After creating heaven and earth, God created Adam and Eve. And the first thing He said to them was, “Don’t.”

“Don’t what?” Adam asked.

“Don’t eat the forbidden fruit,” God said.

“Forbidden fruit? We got forbidden fruit? Hey, Eve! We got Forbidden Fruit!”

“No way!”

“Yes WAY!”

“Don’t eat that fruit!” said God.

“Why?”

“Because I’m your Creator and I said so!” said God, wondering why he hadn’t stopped after making the elephants.

A few minutes later, God saw the kids having an apple break and was angry. “Didn’t I tell you not to eat that fruit?” God asked.

“Uh huh,” Adam replied.

“Then why did you?”

“I dunno,” Eve answered.

“She started it!” Adam said.

“Did Not!”

“DID so!”

“DID NOT!”

Having had it with the two of them, God’s punishment was that Adam and Eve should have children of their own.

~~~

“Vision without action is a daydream. Action without vision is a nightmare.”

Japanese Proverb

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

This daily is sent only to special people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are about 2000 readers from around the world.

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The people around you can enrich your life

Today, give yourself permission to be outrageously kind, irrationally warm, improbably generous. I promise it will be a blast.

Sasha Dicter

be friendly

I hope all is well with you. I am a little worn out from a really full day yesterday and not looking forward to eliminating my backlog today so I am again dipping into the archives to send you a Daily from the past. I’ll do better tomorrow.

Ray’s Daily first published on July 29, 2004

A few days ago I went to the hospital to start my weekly Iron IV’s. It has been probably a year ago or more since I was last in the oncology outpatient department getting the same treatments. There was a male nurse on duty that I knew from earlier treatments and it allowed us to quickly get at the business of the day as well as share some hospital gossip. As I was sitting in the chair with my IV hooked-up the gal who cleans the area each morning came by, she greeted me like an old friend and spent a minute or two asking how I was as we exchanged a little bit of family news. It got me thinking about how much people from all walks of life have made my life a little better. In fact I have often found that the high profile, big achievers I have met are not all that warm or even interesting. Some of the best moments of my life have been spent just learning more about an interesting stranger or new friend. I guess that is why I like the following story so much.

~~~

During my second month of nursing school, our professor gave us a pop quiz. I was a conscientious student and had breezed through the questions, until I read the last one: “What is the first name of the woman who cleans the school?” Surely, this was some kind of joke.

I had seen the cleaning woman several times. She was tall, dark-haired and in her 50s, but how would I know her name? I handed in my paper, leaving the last question blank.

Just before class ended, one student asked if the last question would count toward our quiz grade. “Absolutely,” said the professor. “In your careers, you will meet many people. All are significant. They deserve your attention and care, even if all you do is smile and say ‘hello’.” “I’ve never forgotten that lesson. I also learned her name was Dorothy.

Author Unknown

~~~

Treat everyone as if they are the most important person in the world, because to themselves they are.

Earl Nightingale

~~~

This still boggles my mind.

I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdgnieg

THE PAOMNNEHAL PWEOR OF THE HMUAN MNID

Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn’t mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.

Amzanig huh?

~~~

I prefer to describe my profession as that of a “Contemporary Anthropological Interactive Observer” because it has just the right amount of flair. . . .

Besides, “stalker” is such an ugly word.

~~~

A man was in a terrible auto accident, and his “manhood” was mangled and torn from his body. His doctor assured him that modern medicine could give him back his manhood, but that his insurance wouldn’t cover the surgery, since it was considered cosmetic. The doctor said the cost would be $14,000.

The man was not sure what to do our the size to choose, the doctor urged him to talk it over with his wife before he made any decision. The man called his wife on the phone and explained their options. The doctor came back into the room, and found the man looking dejected.

“Well, what have the two of you decided?” asked the doctor.

The man answered, “She’d rather remodel the kitchen.”

~~~

The things that come to those that wait may be the things left by those who got there first.

~~~

A missionary heard about a native who had five wives.

“You are violating a law of God,” he said, “so you must go and tell four of those women you can no longer live here or consider you their husband.”

The native thought a few moments, then said, “Me wait here.  You tell ’em.”

~~~

The person who agrees with everything you say either isn’t paying attention or plans to sell you something.

~~~

A man entered a stationery store and asked the clerk for a birthday/anniversary card. The clerk replied, “We have birthday cards and we have anniversary cards. Why not take one of each?”

The man said, “You don’t understand. I need a card that covers *both* events! You see, we’re celebrating the fifth anniversary of my wife’s thirty-fourth birthday…”

~~~

To find a fault is easy; to do better may be difficult.

Plutarch

~~~

Old Abraham was a poor tailor whose shop was next door to a very upscale French restaurant. Every day at lunch time, Abraham would go out the back of his shop and eat his black bread and herring while smelling the wonderful odors coming from the restaurant’s kitchen. But one day, Abraham was surprised to receive an invoice from the restaurant for ‘enjoyment of food’. So he went to the restaurant to point out that he had not bought anything from them.

The manager said, “You’re enjoying our food, so you should pay us for it.”

Abraham refused to pay and the restaurant sued him. At the hearing, the judge asked the restaurant to present their side of the case. The manager said, “Every day, this man comes and sits outside our kitchen and smells our food while eating his. It is clear that we are providing added value to his poor food and we deserve to be compensated for it.”

The judge turns to Abraham and said, “What do you have to say to that?”

Abraham didn’t say anything but stuck his hand in his pocket and rattled the few coins he had inside.

The judge asked him, “What is the meaning of that?”

Abraham replied, “I’m paying for the smell of his food with the sound of my money.”

~~~

Morty and Sarah had just returned home from a party. Sarah said, “Do you realize what you did tonight, Morty?”

“No I don’t,” Morty replied, “But I’ll admit I was wrong. What did I do?”

~~~

“What’s the usual tip?” a man growled when a college boy delivered his pizza.

“Well,” the student replied, “this is my first delivery, but the other guys said that if I got a quarter out of you, I’d be doing great.”

“That so?” grunted the man. “In that case, here’s five dollars.”

“Thanks,” the student said, “I’ll put it in my college fund.”

“By the way, what are you studying?”

“Applied psychology.”

~~~

The worst thing about censorship is *******

~~~

“Starbucks announced this week that from now on new Starbucks employees will be required to go through 32 hours of training.

The first hour Starbucks employees learn how to make a cup of coffee, then the next 31 hours they learn how to charge $4 with a straight face.”

Conan O’Brien

~~~

In a department store, a difficult customer and a patient clerk were having a hard time getting together. Nothing the clerk provided was suitable. Finally, the finicky shopper said in annoyance, “Can’t you find a smarter clerk to serve me?”

“No,” said the saleswoman. “The smarter clerk saw you coming and disappeared.”

~~~

People who matter are most aware that everyone else does, too.

Malcolm Forbes

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

This daily is sent only to special people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are about 2000 readers from around the world.

Join us?

“If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, you are a leader.”

John Quincy Adams

 engaging

At a meeting the other day I participated in a discussion on what we need to do to avoid problems in our city while focusing on developing priorities that would make us even better than we are now. A significant part of the discussion centered on the importance of engaging our fellow citizens in activities that would benefit us all.

We discussed the importance of making sure the public has easy access to understandable information on both our challenges and our opportunities. Equally important was letting them know how they could participate in implementing solutions through communications with their legislators, offering their skills as volunteers, banding together with friends and neighbors while not sitting on the sidelines complaining about how others are not doing anything.

Reflecting on the discussion I again realized that how often we think all we have to do is let individuals know that there is a good cause and they will take action. In my experience we spend so much time trying to enlist outsiders that we have little time to educate our own on the value of what we do. In service clubs we do outreach to individuals in a variety of ways while often failing to motivate our own members to share our story with others. We not only need hands and hearts we need disciples who spread the word.

I also am a strong believer in reaching others through partnering with sponsors and likeminded organizations that let their constituents know what is going on so they can join in the cause. We complain that the media won’t tell our story but we often fail to provide them material that demonstrates the importance of our work, anecdotes on how we are making a newsworthy difference in our community and then providing readers a call to arms, a way for them to get involved.

We need to mass market opportunity. The other day I suggested we were in the business of helping the people in our region see future possibilities. But possible only if enough of us care about public safety, understaffed schools, deteriorating streets and the other urban needs that affect us all and become part of the solution. We can make miracles if we set achievable goals, goals that we as citizens can reach if we partner together.

~~~

“Motivation is the art of getting people to do what you want them to do because they want to do it.”

Dwight Eisenhower

~~~

“Ever since we got married, my wife has tried to change me. She got me to stop drinking, smoking and running around until all hours of the night. She taught me how to dress well, enjoy the fine arts, gourmet cooking, classical music, even how to invest in the stock market.”

“Sounds like you may be bitter because she changed you so drastically,” remarked his friend.

“I’m not bitter. Now that I’m so improved, she just isn’t good enough for me.”

~~~

Teacher: I hope I didn’t see you looking at Don’s paper.

Little Johnny: I hope you didn’t either.

~~~

I knew as early as our wedding what marriage to my wife would be like. The priest asked my wife, “Do you take this man to be your husband.” And she said, “I do.”

Then the priest asked me, “Do you take this woman to be your wife,” and my wife said, “He does.”

~~~

Someday, we’ll look back on this, laugh nervously and change the subject.

~~~

Will Rogers said:

1. Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it.

2. The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for.

3. Some people try to turn back their odometers. Not me, I want people to know “why” I look this way. I’ve traveled a long way and some of the roads weren’t paved.

4. When you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to youth, think of Algebra.

5. You know you are getting old when everything either dries up or leaks.

6. I don’t know how I got over the hill without getting to the top.

7. One of the many things no one tells you about aging is that it is such a nice change from being young.

8. One must wait until evening to see how splendid the day has been.

9. Being young is beautiful, but being old is comfortable.

10. Long ago when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks, it was called witchcraft. Today it’s called golf.

And finally, If you don’t learn to laugh at trouble, you won’t have anything to laugh at when you are old.

~~~

There’s always at least one bolt on anything that’s adjustable. It fits whatever size wrench you don’t have.

~~~

A blonde and her brunette friend were talking, when the blonde said, “I hate all the blonde jokes people tell.” “Oh, they are only jokes. There are a lot of stupid people out there. Here, I’ll prove it to you.” They went outside and hailed a taxi driver. “Please take me to 29 Nickel Street to see if I’m home,” said the brunette. The taxi drove them to Nickel Street, and when they finally got out, the brunette looked at the blonde and said, “See! That guy was really stupid.”

“No kidding,” replied the blonde. “There was a pay phone just around the corner. You could have called instead.”

~~~

The most damaging phrase in the language is: It’s always been done that way.

Grace Hopper

~~~

A young man from a prominent family was being divorced by his glamorous wife. His lawyer called with news about the property settlement. “The good news is that she isn’t asking for any share of your future inheritance.”

“Great!” said the young man. “What’s the bad news?”

“Well,” said the lawyer, “after the divorce, she’s marrying your father!”

~~~

“In everyone’s life, at some time, our inner fire goes out. It is then burst into flame by an encounter with another human being. We should all be thankful for those people who rekindle the inner spirit.”

Albert Schweitzer

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

This daily is sent only to special people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are about 2000 readers from around the world.

It is up to us

“To him who is determined it remains only to act.”

Italian Proverb

make_a_difference

As you know I usually am at the YMCA every weekday morning at 5 AM when they open. Mondays and Wednesdays have been especially pleasant as Jonas, a part time employee who opened the center on those days and always with a pleasant greeting. He, like I am, is a frequent cruiser and we have sailed on many of the same ships so it has been fun sharing memories. He was in yesterday morning and we said farewell since he has left to take a new position working with high school kids. It is a worthy job that now will be done by one of the good guys. I will miss him and am glad I got to know him. He again reminded me how pleasing it is to have workers we meet who go out of their way to make others have a good day.

~~~

Yesterday I also attended a Leadership Council meeting for an organization that is helping our cities people participate in building a better future for all of us in Central Indiana. The meeting went well and outlined some of the things that we can do to bring people and organizations together for the betterment of all. At one point someone reported that there are many folks that just don’t care and someone else reminded us that there are others that are hungry, infirm or have other needs that are so overwhelming that they don’t have the capacity to do more than just survive. What they said was right but unfortunately we often spend so much time and energy trying to get people to change their behavior that little gets done. I believe that the secret is to make sure we reach all who do care and help them see what they can do as well as making sure those who have yet to care know there is a place for them. Too many of us waste our time and energy complaining about the status quo and letting everyone know that someone else should do something. We complain about congressional gridlock, failing educational systems, deteriorating infrastructure and much more and yet we don’t seem to realize that the only people who can solve the problems are us. If constituents don’t care enough to be heard and if people just sit back and don’t offer to help solve problems not much will be done. We are inundated with information and it makes it difficult to acquire the knowledge and to learn about opportunities that would help us make a difference. And you know what, if we only paid a little more attention and got a little more involved we can help make a big difference.

One Can Make A Difference

 

One seed can start a garden

One moment can change a life

One conversation,

Can start a friendship

One step can start a journey

One word can say so much

One smile can brighten a day

One small act of love,

can mean everything to someone

One person can make a difference,

And to me, that person is you.

Matt Windseth

~~~

“The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.”

Edmund Burke

~~~

A woman whose fondness for the good life had taken its toll in added pounds – and girth – was being shown a Jeep by a salesman at an auto dealership. When the salesman’s pitch had run its course, he sought to close with the typical line, “Now what would it take to get you into one of these?” Looking at the Jeep’s high front seat, the woman replied, “Probably a crowbar.”

~~~

Just living is not enough… One must have sunshine, freedom, and a little flower.

Hans Christian Anderson

~~~

Alan King was one of my all-time favorite comedians, he passed some time ago but his humor lives on.

  • On Banks: “Banks have a new image. Now you have ‘a friend,’ your friendly banker. If the banks are so friendly, how come they chain down the pens?”
  • On Jewish Mothers: “What’s the difference between a Rottweiler and a Jewish mother? Eventually the Rottweiler lets go.”
  • On his parent’s Russian roots: King took his mother, Minnie, to see “Fiddler on the Roof,” thinking the fictitious village of Anatevka might bring back memories of her own childhood village. “And when the show was over and we were back on the street,” Mr. King wrote in his autobiography ‘Name-Dropping: The Life and Lies of Alan King’, “I said, ‘Ma, how did you enjoy it? Did it bring back memories?'” “‘It was wonderful,’ she said. ‘Only I don’t remember so much singing.’ “
  • On meeting royalty: Following a performance for the British Royal Family, he was introduced to Queen Elizabeth. “How do you do, Mr. King?” she is reported to have said. “How do you do, Mrs. Queen?” he is said to have replied.
  • On Love and Marriage: “If you want to read about love and marriage, you’ve got to buy two separate books”
  • On Gifts for the Wife: King told of a Jewish man asking his wife if she would like diamond jewelry, a new car or a trip for their anniversary. She responded that she wanted a divorce. “Oy vey,” the man replied. “I wasn’t planning on spending that much.”

~~~

I’ll drive you crazy, but you’re paying for gas.

~~~

Hanging in the hallway at the High School are the basketball team pictures from the past 40 years. A player in the center of the front row in each picture holds a basketball identifying the year — “62-63,” “63-64,” “64-65,” etc. One day I spotted a freshman looking curiously at the photos. Turning to me, he said, “Isn’t it strange how the teams always lost by one point?”

~~~

“If you’re going to do something tonight that you’ll be be sorry for tomorrow morning, sleep late.”

 Henry Youngman

~~~

When her late husband’s will was read, a widow learned he had left the bulk of his fortune to another woman. Enraged, she rushed to change the inscription on her spouse’s tombstone. “Sorry, lady,” said the stonecutter. “I inscribed ‘Rest in Peace’ on your orders. I can’t change it now.” “Very well,” she said grimly. “Just add, ‘Until We Meet Again.’ ”

~~~

“Never believe that a few caring people can’t change the world. For, indeed, that’s all who ever have.”

Margaret Mead

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile

This daily is sent only to special people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are about 2000 readers from around the world.

Hannibal had it right

“We will either find a way, or make one.”

Hannibal

determination2

Yesterday I suggested that we should not let externally imposed barriers keep us from moving ahead with our lives. When we encounter them we just have to find a way around them, through them or over them. If we stop or pause too long we stand a chance of lingering so long in the doldrums that it becomes too easy to give up and that just assures an uninteresting and dull life ahead.

The tough part is that sometimes the barriers seem to be insurmountable and we lose confidence in our ability find an alternative path. One thing I know is giving up is not the answer; I have found that combining determination with perseverance almost always works. Sometimes it takes time and energy but the process is certainly better than sitting down with woeful regret.

I do however believe in an occasional rest stop to relax and recharge. In my case it may be dropping out for a few hours at a movie matinée, doing some uninterrupted recreational reading, taking a short trip or in some other pursuit with the only rules being that my problem is set aside for a bit. I have found over the years that these brief step-back periods put my problems into better perspective and upon my return the barriers almost always seem less imposing. When I do restart the journey I often find the detour better than the original journey would have been.

Our old friend Ralph Marston is a strong believer in the value of determination, here is what he had to say about it some time ago.

 

More determined than ever

Let your high expectations push you forward. But don’t let them create disappointments that hold you back. It’s great when you expect the best. But it’s important to keep in mind that you won’t get all the way there immediately, on the first attempt.

When you’re disappointed by the results, that’s no reason to give up your high expectations. On the contrary, it’s a good time to recommit yourself to those high expectations and perhaps to even raise them a bit. Instead of being discouraged by less than spectacular results, be encouraged by the fact that you’re aiming so high. Double down on your expectations by becoming more determined than ever. You won’t instantly achieve what you set out to achieve. The fact that it will take a while to reach makes your goal all the more valuable.

Expect the best and if you fail to get it, continue to expect the best. Eventually you’ll reach the goal, and it will be well worth all your positive persistence.

~~~

“The person who really wants to do something finds a way; the other finds an excuse.”

Sir John Marks Templeton

~~~

A man having lunch at a Chinese restaurant noticed that the table had been set with forks, not chopsticks. He asked why. The waiter said “Chopsticks are provided only on request.” “But,” the man countered, “if you gave your patrons chopsticks, you wouldn’t have to pay someone to wash all the forks.” “True,” the waiter shot back, “but we would have to hire three more people to clean up the mess.”

~~~

“Economy” today means a large container of detergent or a small car.

~~~

She said about having and raising kids that:

* If it was going to be easy, it never would have started with something called labor!

* Shouting to make your children obey is like using the horn to steer your car, and you get about the same results.

* To be in your children’s memories tomorrow, you have to be in their lives today.

* The smartest advice on raising children is to enjoy them while they are still on your side.

* The best way to keep kids at home is to give it a loving atmosphere ~ and hide the keys to the car.

* The right temperature in a home is maintained by warm hearts, not by hot heads.

* The joy of motherhood: What a woman experiences when all the children are finally in bed.

* Life’s golden age is when the kids are too old to need baby-sitters and too young to borrow the family car.

* A child outgrows your lap, but never outgrows your heart.

* There are three ways to get something done: Do it yourself, hire someone to do it, or forbid your children to do it.

* Adolescence is the age when children try to bring up their parents.

* Oh, to be only half as wonderful as my child thought I was when he was small, and half as stupid as my teenager now thinks I am.

* An alarm clock is a device for awakening people who don’t have small children.

~~~

A bore is a person who talks so much about himself that you don’t get a chance to talk about yourself.

~~~

A millionaire informs his attorney, “I want a stipulation in my Will that my wife is to inherit everything, but only if she remarries within six months of my death.”

“Why such an odd stipulation?” asks the attorney.

“Because,” he says, “I want someone to be sorry I died.”

~~~

Who coined the phrase “to coin a phrase”?

Friends took their first-grader on a car trip to Canada.  To help pass the time, the boy practiced his reading skills by calling out road signs.

He fell asleep just before they entered Quebec.

When he awoke, he saw the French highway signs and said, in a worried tone, “I think I forgot how to read while I was asleep.”

~~~

Trust yourself. Create the kind of self that you will be happy to live with all your life. Make the most of yourself by fanning the tiny, inner sparks of possibility into flames of achievement.

Foster C. McClellan

~~~

Teacher: Little Johnny, go to the map and find North America. Little Johnny: Here it is!

Teacher: Correct. Now, class, who discovered America?

Class: Little Johnny!

~~~

“I’m not saying that the customer service in my bank is bad, but I went in the other day and asked the clerk to check my balance. She leaned over and pushed me!”

~~~

A man is recovering from surgery when a nurse asks him how he is feeling.

“I’m O.K. but I didn’t like the four-letter-word the doctor used in surgery,” he answered.

“What did he say,” asked the nurse.

“OOPS!”

~~~

Nothing in this world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful people with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not; the world is full of educated failures. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent.

Calvin Coolidge

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

This daily is sent only to special people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are about 2000 readers from around the world.

Make sure you change course if you have to

When you come to a roadblock, take a detour.

Barbara Bush

detour

The other day I suggested that one of the secrets of a happy life was the ability to stay nimble and agile as our world changes. Once we realize that the most practical way to travel is not always in a straight line life becomes easier. It does not take long for most people to realize that things seldom turn out exactly as they thought they would or wished that they would and when they don’t the choice is to stop and deteriorate or change direction and move ahead.

Yesterday I was talking to a friend who was sympathetic to some of the challenges I have had to face over the years. I said that I never found much value in agonizing over things I could not change, my time was better spent adapting to reality and moving on. In truth I honestly believe that it is the obstacles that life throws in front of us that make us stronger. Happiness does not have to only come from resting always in the sun, it can come from our successfully dealing with the impediments that require us to change course. It is just like in real life, detours may delay us somewhat but we get to where we want to go while those who turn back never do.

Here is a story with a worthy message that I like, I hope you will too.

 

Water and Rocks

By Jeff Jennings

Recently, while hiking in the foothills of South Carolina, I happened upon a small, yet briskly flowing whitewater creek. While relaxing and enjoying the solitude, I sensed a battle for superiority between the highly spirited water and the large boulders resting on the creek bed along the edges of the stream.

At first, the rocks, stubborn, immovable and unyielding seemed to have their way with its adversary. However the water, determined yet forgiving, seemed merely inconvenienced by the presence of the rocks, as it effortlessly changed course re-charting a path towards its original destination.

Soon it became clear that the rocks, although remaining strong and steadfast, were losing this confrontation as the waters’ total indifference began to slowly reform these obstacles into smooth and beautiful polished stones.

You see, there seemed to be total lack of struggle associated with the water’s trek. Struggle is like bondage forcing conformity and the water would have none of that. To the contrary, the water seemed perfectly content to move around the rocks when necessary, following some preordained route God had originally intended.

I paused for thought. Maybe people need to be more determined and less steadfast and stubborn. Maybe human beings need to always be open to different points of view, not afraid to readjust their direction as life presents all of its new and unforeseen challenges.

~~~

“Failure is a detour, not a dead-end street.”

Zig Ziglar

~~~

The Ferrari Formula 1 Team fired their entire pit crew yesterday. The announcement followed Ferrari’s decision to take advantage of the British governments ‘Work for the Dole’ scheme and employ unemployable youth.

The decision to hire them was brought on by a recent documentary on how unemployed Liverpool youths were able to remove a set of wheels in less than 6 seconds without proper equipment, whereas Ferrari’s existing crew could only do it in 8 seconds with millions of pounds worth of high tech gear.

This was thought to be an excellent, yet bold move, by Ferrari Management. As most races are won and lost in the pits, Ferrari would have an advantage over every team.

However, Ferrari got more than they bargained for at the crew’s first practice session, not only were the new Pit Crew able to change the tires in under 6 seconds but within 12 seconds they had re-sprayed, retagged and sold the vehicle over to the MacLaren Team for four bottles of Stella and an old Nike shell-suit.

~~~

Rudeness is a weak imitation of strength.

Eric Hoffer

~~~

Two very reform Jews from the big city were traveling in Florida where on Shabbos they found an orthodox shul in a small town where they could attend services.

The shul Rebbe, seeing strangers at the entrance, greeted the two strangers and asked where they would like to sit.

Looking somewhat confused, one out-of-towner smiled and said, ” Nonsmoking please “.

~~~

If quitters never win, and winners never quit, what fool came up with “Quit while you’re ahead”.

~~~

NEW INVENTIONS BY BLONDES

— The water-proof towel

— Glow in the dark sunglasses

— Submarine screen doors

— A book on how to read.

— Inflatable dart boards

— A dictionary index.

— Powdered water

— Pedal-powered wheel chairs

— Waterproof tea bags

— Zero proof alcohol

— Reuseable ice cubes

— See-through toilet tissue

— Do-it-yourself road map

~~~

If it’s true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are OTHERS here for?

~~~

Heather and Marcy hadn’t seen each other in awhile, so they decided to meet for lunch. The talk naturally got around to their respective love lives. Marcy confided that there really wasn’t anyone special in her life. Heather, on the other hand, was beaming about the new man she had found. “He’s perfect. He’s handsome, and last night when we went out to dinner, he said the four little words I’ve been waiting to hear a man say to me!”

“He said ‘will you marry me’?” Marcy asked.

Heather replied, “No, he said ‘put your money away’.”

~~~

My dog saw a sign that said: “Wet Paint” so he did!

~~~

Joe’s wife likes to sing so she decided to join the church choir. From time to time she would practice while she was in the kitchen preparing dinner. Whenever she would start in on a song, Joe would head outside to the porch.

His wife, with hurt feelings, said, “What’s the matter, Joe? Don’t you like my singing?”

Joe replied, “Honey, I love your singing, but I just want to make sure the neighbors know I’m not beating you.”

~~~

Failure should be our teacher, not our undertaker. Failure is delay, not defeat. It is a temporary detour, not a dead end. Failure is something we can avoid only by saying nothing, doing nothing, and being nothing.

Denis Waitley

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

This daily is sent only to special people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are about 2000 readers from around the world.

Life rewards the nimble

“I don’t regret the things I’ve done, I regret the things I didn’t do when I had the chance.” 

Unknown

 Change

I sure find my life interesting. Yesterday I had two blood draws and one med change. Last Friday I got a call from one of my specialty health teams reporting that a culture they took some time ago was positive so I needed to go on a highly targeted antibiotic. The week before I had surgery where they removed a kidney stone. Tomorrow I am off to the dentist. Next week more tests and life goes on. The good news is that they keep finding and fixing stuff and each time I do a little bit better.

My more limited life style lately coupled with so much time spent in medical waiting rooms has not been helped by my appreciation of daily naps. I am starting to get antsy by my staying out of the fray as much as I have lately. Fortunately I will get back in the water with two important meetings. There is a lot of good stuff going on here in Indy these days and opportunities for us all to get involved. I am glad to be able to again do my part even if it is somewhat limited.

The one thing I have learned is that I cannot reliably predict the future. Things keep changing sometimes for the good and sometimes for the not so good. The secret is not to put off the good stuff until later, do it now while you can while staying nimble. I am glad that I have so many things yet to do that when something does intervene and requires me to back off doing something I always have a reasonable substitute activity to keep me engaged. I never want to waste time pausing in remorse, I would much rather spend my time doing something even if it is primarily just mental exercise.

Here is something I like penned by Sarah Ban Breathnach whose work celebrates quiet joys, simple pleasures and everyday epiphanies. She is author of the New York Times bestsellers, Simple Abundance: A Daybook of Comfort and Joy and Something More.

 

Life is Always Movement

Life doesn’t ever calm down long enough for us to wait until tomorrow to start living the lives we deserve.

Life is always movement, always change, always unforeseen circumstances. There will always be something to grab your attention.

Let’s just acknowledge that as far as real life is concerned, we are only one step away from dealing with dysfunction….Procrastination has robbed us of too many opportunities.

The world needs dreamers and the world needs doers. But above all, the world needs dreamers who do.

Whatever we are waiting for – peace of mind, contentment, grace, the inner awareness of simple abundance – it will surely come to us, but only when we are ready to receive it with an open and grateful heart.

~~~

All life is an experiment. The more experiments you make, the better

Ralph Waldo Emerson

~~~

A Catholic Dictionary

AMEN: The only part of a prayer that everyone knows.

BULLETIN: Your receipt for attending Mass.

CHOIR: A group of people whose singing allows the rest of the congregation to lip-sync.

HYMN: A song of praise usually sung in a key two octaves higher than that of the congregation’s range.

RECESSIONAL HYMN: The last song at Mass often sung a little more quietly, since most of the people have already left.

INCENSE: Holy Smoke!

JUSTICE: When kids have kids of their own.

PEW: A medieval torture device still found in Catholic churches.

RECESSIONAL: The ceremonial procession at the conclusion of Mass led by parishioners trying to beat the crowd to the parking lot.

RELICS: People who have been going to Mass for so long, they actually know when to sit, kneel, and stand.

TEN COMMANDMENTS: The most important Top Ten list not given by David Letterman.

USHERS: The only people in the parish who don’t know the seating capacity of a pew.

~~~

Business conventions are important because they demonstrate how many people a company can operate without.

~~~

A backslider suddenly began attending church faithfully on Sunday mornings instead of going fishing. The pastor was highly gratified and told him, “How wonderful it makes me feel to see you at services with your good wife!”

“Well, Preacher,” said the fisherman, “it’s a matter of choice. I’d rather hear your sermon than hers.”

~~~

“The ornament of a house is the friends who frequent it.”

Ralph Waldo Emerson

~~~

Announcement: the mental-disease-of-the-month club is being disbanded immediately. The reasons being:

1. During dipsomania month, the club party spent 10 times its budget on refreshments.

2. During kleptomania month, all of the club furnishings were removed, and (as aforementioned) the budget was already spent and gone.

3. During megalomania month, the club organization broke down due to having sixteen claimants to being Club President, etc.

4. During multiple personality month, our club roster roughly tripled in size with no increase in dues.

5.During paranoia month, the inflated roster dropped to zero as each member changed his or her mailing address and left no forwarding address for the club.

You members were obviously out to ruin us; it’s all clear now. It took all our remaining personal savings to track you all down. Therefore, here is your last installment: clinical depression. Have a nice day.”

~~~

I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny forks and spoons, so I wondered what Chinese mothers use.   Toothpicks?

~~~

A young couple met with their Rabbi to set a date for their wedding. When he asked whether they preferred a contemporary or a traditional service, they opted for the contemporary. On the big day, a major storm forced the groom to take an alternate route to the synagogue. The streets were flooded, so he rolled up his pants legs to keep his trousers dry. When he finally reached the shul, his best man rushed him up the aisle and up to the altar, just as the ceremony was starting.

“Pull down your pants,” whispered the Rabbi.

“Uh, Rebbe, I’ve changed my mind,” the groom responded. “I think I would prefer the traditional service.”

~~~

The happiest people seem to be those who have no particular cause for being happy except that they are so.

William Ralph Inge

~~~

While I was paying for my items at a local store, the man behind me laid his purchases on the counter.  Among them was a large, flowery birthday card with “To my wonderful wife” printed on it.

The clerk said,  “You’ve chosen our biggest and prettiest card.”

The man nodded sadly and replied, “One day late.”

~~~

Uncertainty is the only certainty there is, and knowing how to live with insecurity is the only security

John Allen Paulos

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

This daily is sent only to special people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are about 2000 readers from around the world.

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