Ray's musings and humor

Archive for August, 2006

It is up to us!

It’s that time again!

 

Next week our national election season will begin in earnest. Sadly too much of it will be sound bites, doctored pictures, etc., all designed to trigger our emotions and divert us away from the issues. In many respects old time politics had a lot to offer. At least I remember more substance, more honest debate, and sorry to say a more informed electorate. No matter our political point of view it is our responsibility to vote wisely. I am not like so may others who feel everyone should vote even though they know nothing about the issues. These are critical times and we need an informed electorate to choose our leaders and then demand that they rise above partisanship and act as responsible stewards. Here is what I wrote at this same time of the year leading up to our last national elections, unfortunately I feel it still holds true.

~~~

One of the things that truly frightens me this political season is how easy it is for people I know to say whatever justifies the ends that they seek. The same applies to the advocacy groups, the political spokespersons, and others. What must our children think when they see us placing less value on truth and accuracy than we do on winning or getting what we want. It seems too easy to sacrifice morality for expediency. I did not write the following but I believe it is absolutely right.

If you plant honesty, you will reap trust.

If you plant goodness, you will reap friends.

If you plant humility, you will reap greatness.

If you plant perseverance, you will reap victory.

If you plant consideration, you will reap harmony.

If you plant hard work, you will reap success.

If you plant forgiveness, you will reap reconciliation.

If you plant openness, you will  reap intimacy.

If you plant patience, you will reap improvements.

If you plant faith, you will reap miracles.

But…

If you plant dishonesty, you will reap distrust.

If you plant selfishness, you will reap loneliness.

If you plant pride, you will reap destruction.

If you plant envy, you will reap trouble.

If you plant laziness, you will reap stagnation.

If you plant bitterness, you will reap isolation.

If you plant greed, you will reap loss.

If you plant gossip, you will reap enemies.

If you plant worries, you will reap wrinkles.

If you plant sin, you will reap guilt.

So, be careful what you plant now for it will determine what you reap tomorrow. The seeds you now scatter will make life worse or better for you or for the ones who will come after you.

Yes, someday, you will enjoy the fruits or you will pay for the choices you plant today. Believe it or not, it is up to you to help deal with the problems we face as a society.

~~~

It is unfortunate, considering that enthusiasm moves the world, that so few enthusiasts can be trusted to speak the truth.

Arthur James Balfour

~~~

My cousin, a recent widower, who lives up in the Tampa area thought it might be a good idea to get himself a dog for a bit of companionship. Checking out the pet ads in the local newspaper he came across one that read: "Purebred Police Dog $25". Thinking that sounded like a pretty fair bargain, he called and ordered the dog to be delivered and paid up-front by credit card.

The very next day a van pulled up and left on his doorstep, in a cardboard kennel, the him mangiest looking mongrel he had ever seen.

In a bit of a rage, he telephoned the man who had placed the ad and shouted over the phone. "What the hell do you mean by calling that mangy mutt a purebred police dog?"

"Hey calm down," the man responded, "Don’t be deceived by his looks, mister," "That dog’s under cover and in the Secret Service."

~~~

"A people that values its privileges above its principles soon loses both."

Dwight D. Eisenhower

~~~

She said: I had forgotten to get my estrogen patch prescription refilled, and soon the symptoms of menopause–hot flashes, forgetfulness, and irritability–returned.

At the drugstore, I found myself telling the pharmacist all about my problems. After listening patiently, he asked, "So, how many people asked you to get this refilled?"

~~~

I was pleased to learn that as men mature they become even more attractive, in their unique, distinguished appearance. Women find them overwhelmingly seductive and can’t help themselves. Although I was not happy to learn that men my age are also a lot more gullible and will believe most anything!

~~~

Never put off until tomorrow what you can forget about entirely.

~~~

Reverend Smith, a respected church leader, arrived in a large city to deliver a series of speeches. At a banquet the first evening, he noticed some reporters in the audience.

Because he wanted to use some of the stories he told that night in his speeches the next day, he asked the reporters to omit them from their articles.

One article that came out the next day, written by a cub reporter, concluded with this line: "Reverend Smith also told a number of stories that cannot be printed."

~~~

I like living. I have sometimes been wildly, despairingly, acutely miserable, racked with sorrow, but through it all I still know quite certainty that just to be alive is a grand thing.

Agatha Christie

~~~

A tired homemaker opened the front door of her home to find a young minister from the neighborhood who said, "I’m collecting donations for the new children’s home we’re building. I hope you’ll give what you can."

"To be sure," said the beleaguered woman, "I’ll give you two boys, two girls, or one of each."

~~~

Ask why until you understand.

~~~

She said: My teenager was headed to school one morning when I told him that the neck tag on his shirt was hanging out.

"I know," he replied. "It’s a fad me and some of the guys started."

Weeks later, as the style persisted, I commented, "I can’t stand it! Every time I see that, I want to fix it for you." I gently tucked the tag in place and rumpled his hair.

"Yeah," he said smiling slyly. "All the girls do, too."

~~~

Have you ever thought that life is a car wash and you are on a bike?

~~~

A friend and his wife were considering traveling to Alaska–a trip that the husband had long dreamed of taking.  He kept talking about how great it would be to stay in a log cabin without electricity, to hunt moose, and drive a dog team instead of a car.  "If we decided to live there permanently, away from civilization, what would you miss the most?" he asked his wife.

She replied, "You."

~~~

"Where all think alike, no one thinks very much."

Walter Lippmann

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

 Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana, USA

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies.

The editor is somewhat senile.

This daily is sent only to special people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can join at http://groups.google.com/group/Rays-Daily. Back issues are posted at http://360.yahoo.com/raykiwsp currently there are about 500 readers from all over the world.

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Woe is me

“The size of your success is measured by the strength of your desire;

the size of your dream; and how you handle disappointment along the way.”

Robert Kiyosaki

 

 

Often, after I have written something for the daily, I tell myself “easy for you to say.” I am generally a big time optimist, I believe we can face adversity, and that we can get over it and put it behind us. I make it sound easy, but I know often it is not.

While I advocate rolling with the punches and pulling yourself up and finding a new beginning I am often reminded how overwhelming disappointment can be. That really hit home today as I learned that one of my grandsons has an injury that may take him out of action for some time. While second opinions, MRI’s, and a formal prognosis has yet to happen the implications of the injury are distressing. You see my grandson is not just a good student and a great son and brother; he is also an outstanding soccer player. He has played in tournaments as far away as Las Vegas and has just recently begun his high schools soccer season. He has been great in the games he has played for his school where he plays the key defensive position and is the team’s playmaker. His defensive play has been fun to watch as he is quick to the ball has some great moves and plays with enthusiasm. He practices year around and plays both club and school soccer. Soccer is the highlight of his young life, and now it may be gone, hopefully for only a season or less, but it might serious enough to last longer.

You and I both know it is not the end of the world and that he has a full life ahead of him. But unlike me at his age, he has something that sets him apart from others, something that makes him special, and now something that may be gone, at least for awhile. I sometimes wonder if those who do little that is really special have it easier since they don’t have that much to loose if things go bad. Fortunately however most people do the best they can and while those who are good at what they do may risk great disappointment the world is a better place because they excel.

So my heart goes out to my grandson. And if his injury is serious I will not tell him that things like, “things happen and to get over it and move on.” What I will tell him is that I understand his pain and that what has made him special still exists inside him and that will carry him on to other victories. But I also know that wounds, especially deep wounds, take time to heal, time when most of us can use a little solace.

“Disappointment to a noble soul is what cold water is to burning metal;

it strengthens tempers, intensifies, but never destroys it.”

Eliza Tabor

~~~

THE TEACHER SAYS

1. Your son has a remarkable ability in gathering needed information from his classmates.

Really means: He was caught cheating on a test.

2. Karen is an endless fund of energy and vitability.

Really means: The hyperactive monster can’t stay seated for five minutes.

3. Fantastic imagination! Unmatched in his capacity for blending fact with fiction.

Really means: He’s definitely one of the biggest liars I have ever met.

4. Margie exhibits a casual, relaxed attitude to school, indicating that high expectations don’t intimidate her.

Really means: The lazy thing hasn’t done one assignment all term.

5. Her athletic ability is marvelous. Superior hand-eye coordination.

Really means: The little creep stung me with a rubber band from 15 feet away.

6. Nick thrives on interaction with his peers.

Really means: Your son needs to stop socializing and start working.

7. Your daughter’s greatest asset is her demonstrative public discussions.

Really means: Classroom lawyer! Why is it that every time I explain an assignment she creates a class argument.

8. John enjoys the thrill of engaging challenges with his peers.

Really means: He’s a bully.

9. An adventurous nature lover who rarely misses opportunities to explore new territory.

Really means: Your daughter was caught skipping school at the fishing pond.

10. I am amazed at her tenacity in retaining her youthful personality.

Really means: She’s so immature that we’ve run out of diapers.

11. Unlike some students who hide their emotion, Charles is very expressive and open.

Really means: He must have written the Whiner’s Guide.

12. I firmly believe that her intellectual and emotional progress would be enhanced through a year’s repetition of her learning environment.

Really means: Regretfully, we believe that she is not ready for high school and must repeat the 8th grade.

13. Her exuberant verbosity is awesome.

Really means: A mouth that never stops yacking.

~~~

For most men there are three ages of hair: parted, unparted and departed.

~~~

Mike and Nancy were married for 40 years and decided they wanted to renew their vows and planned a second wedding.

They were discussing the details with their friends. Nancy wasn’t going to wear a traditional bridal gown and she started describing the dress she was planning to wear. One of her friends asked what color shoes she had to go with the dress. She replied, "Silver."

At that point, her husband chimed in, "Yep silver…to match her hair."

Shooting a glaring look at Mike’s bald spot, Nancy’s friend said, "So, Mike, I guess you are going barefoot."

~~~

"If you haven’t got anything nice to say about anybody, come sit next to me."

Alice Roosevelt Longworth

~~~

My wife clipped a job listing out of the paper for me. She said it wasn’t much to start out… but a huge pay raise.   It read, "Salary: 23k to start. 401k after 1 yr."  

~~~

A City Policeman went up to a vendor selling toys and said, "I’m sorry, you can’t sell that stuff without a license."  

The peddler replied, "I knew I wasn’t selling any, but I didn’t know the reason." 

~~~

The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.

Mohandas Gandhi

~~~

At one point during a game, the coach called one of his 7-year-old hockey players aside and asked, "Do you understand what cooperation is? What a team is?"

The little boy nodded in the affirmative.

"Do you understand that what matters is not whether we win or lose, but how we play together as a team?"

The little boy nodded yes.

"So," the coach continued, "I’m sure you know, when a penalty is called, you shouldn’t argue, curse, attack the referee, or call him names. Do you understand all that?"

Again the little boy nodded.

He continued, "And when I call you off the ice so that another boy gets a chance to play, it’s not good sportsmanship to call your coach ‘a dumb ass’, is it?"

Again the little boy nodded.

"Good," said the coach. "Now go over there and explain all that to your mother!!!"

~~~

“Disappointment is the nurse of wisdom”

Bayle Roche

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

 Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana, USA

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies.

The editor is somewhat senile.

This daily is sent only to special people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can join at http://groups.google.com/group/Rays-Daily. Back issues are posted at http://360.yahoo.com/raykiwsp currently there are about 500 readers from all over the world.

Tomorrow is a new day

Though no one can go back and make a brand new start, anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending

Author Unknown

 

I spent some time this morning with a long time friend who is in the process of planning the rest of her working life. I am pleased that she is not falling into the trap of only finding something she can do instead of finding something she wants to do. A few years ago I shared my belief in the value of a new start, here is what I wrote at the time:

 

One of the greatest things I have found in life is how great it is to begin again. No matter what our age we can find adventure, joy, and satisfaction in doing something new. I don’t think it is a case of choosing to go over the same old ground, but rather a chance to choose to begin anew and cover new ground. Every time we make a fresh start we are provided the opportunity to offload burdens from our past. Of course we have to take advantage of the opportunity and not let past burdens limit our ability to carry new cargo. Actually we can even begin anew everyday, maybe not completely, but at least enough to stick our toe in the water and test what it has to offer.

Here is what Bill Greer suggests:

Begin to see yourself as you were when you were the happiest and strongest you’ve ever been.

Begin to remember what worked for you (and what worked against you), and try to capture the magic again.

Begin to remember how natural it was when you were a child — to live a lifetime each day.

Begin to forget the baggage you have carried with you for years: the problems that don’t matter anymore, the tears that cried themselves away, and the worries that are going to wash away on the shore of tomorrow’s new beginnings.

Tomorrow tells us it will be here every new day of our lives; and if we will be wise, we will turn away from the problems of the past and give the future — and ourselves — a chance to become the best of friends.

Sometimes all it takes is a wish in the heart to let yourself begin again.

~~~

We are too busy mopping the floor to turn off the faucet.

Author Unknown

~~~

From kids test papers, essays, etc. The spellings are the original ones.

*H2O is hot water, and CO2 is cold water.

*To collect fumes of sulphur, hold a deacon over a flame in a test tube.

*When you smell an oderless gas, it is probably carbon monoxide.

*Water is composed of two gins, Oxygin and Hydrogin. Oxygin is pure gin. Hydrogin is water and gin.

*A super saturated solution is one that holds more than it can hold.

*Liter: A nest of young puppies.

*Magnet: Something you find crawling all over a dead cat.

*Momentum: What you give a person when they are going away.

*Vacuum: A large, empty space where the pope lives.

*The pistol of the flower is its only protection against insects.

*A fossil is an extinct animal. The older it is, the more extinct it is.

*To remove dust from the eye, pull the eye down over the nose.

*For a nosebleed: Put the nose much lower that the heart until the heart stops.

*For head colds: use an agonizer to spray the nose until it drops in your throat.

*Germinate: To become a naturalized German.

*The tides are a fight between the Earth and moon. All water tends towards the moon, because there is no water on the moon, and nature abhors a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in this fight.

*Blood flows down one leg and up the other.

~~~

What this country needs today is fewer experts on what this country needs.

~~~

Jill and Nadine hadn’t seen each other in awhile, so they decided to meet for lunch.  The talk naturally got around to their respective love lives.  Jill confided that there really wasn’t anyone special in her life.

Nadine, on the other hand, was beaming about the new man she had found. 

"He’s perfect.  He’s handsome, and last night when we went out to dinner, he said the four little words I’ve been waiting to hear a man say to me!"

"He said ‘will you marry me’?" Jill asked.

Nadine replied, "No, he said ‘put your money away’

~~~

Birthdays are good. The more you have, the longer you live.

~~~

A guy about to tee off was approached by a man who held out a card that read, "I am a deaf mute. May I please play through?"

The first man gave the card back, angrily shaking his head, and saying, "No, you CANNOT play through." He assumed the guy read lips so he mouthed, "I can’t believe you would try to use your handicap to your own advantage like that! Shame on you!"

The deaf man walked away and the first man whacked the ball onto the green and then walked off to finish the hole.

Just as he was about to put the ball into the hole he was hit in the head with a golf ball that knocked him out cold. When he came to a few minutes later, he looked around and saw the deaf mute sternly looking at him, one hand on his hip, the other hand holding up four fingers.

~~~

"The world is round, and the place which may seem like the end may also be only the beginning."

Ivy Baker

~~~

A teacher was giving a talk on company slogans and was asking his students if they were familiar with them.

"Joe," he asked, "which company has the slogan, ‘Come fly the friendly skies’?"

Joe answered the correct airline.

"Brenda, can you tell me which company has the slogan, ‘Don’t leave home without it’?"

Brenda answered the correct credit card company with no difficulty.

"Now Jonny, tell me which company bears the slogan, ‘Just do it’?"

And Little Jonny answered, "Mom."

~~~

When push comes to shove… somebody’s gonna figure out that "push" and "shove" mean the same damn thing.

~~~

A terrific explosion occurs in a gunpowder factory, and once all the mess has been cleared up, and inquiry begins.

One of the few survivors is pulled up to make a statement. "Okay Simpson," says the investigator, "you were near the scene – what happened ?"

"Well, it’s like this. Old Charley Higgins was in the mixing room, and I saw him take a cigarette out of his pocket and light up."

"He was smoking in the mixing room ?" the investigator said in stunned horror, "How long had he been with the company?"

"About 20 years, sir"

"20 years in the company, then he goes and strikes a match in the mixing room, I’d have thought it would have been the last thing he’d have done."

"It was, sir."

~~~

"Turn your face to the sun, and the shadows fall behind you."
Maori Proverb

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

 Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana, USA

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies.

The editor is somewhat senile.

This daily is sent only to special people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can join at http://groups.google.com/group/Rays-Daily. Back issues are posted at http://360.yahoo.com/raykiwsp currently there are about 500 readers from all over the world.

I forgot to worry!

 

"Worry does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow; it empties today of its strength."

Corrie Ten Boom

~~~

I was having coffee with a friend this morning when we started to talk about worry. I shared with him that I sometimes get criticized because I don’t often worry. As I am sure you know, most things we worry about never happen. I shared with my friend that I generally don’t worry about something until it is too late. I expect most everything to work out and most of the time it does and when it doesn’t there is no use worrying since it is time to do whatever needs to be done to get over it. Maybe I am not smart enough to worry much, or maybe lazy, or a little slow, whatever it is I like it. I know I do much better during worry-free time than I ever would if my mind was filled with worry. If something goes wrong I’ll deal with it when it does, until then let me stay happy and enjoy all there is to enjoy.

Here is something I found on the net that says it better than I ever could.

~~~

I will no longer worry about yesterday. It is in the past and the past will never change. Only I can change by choosing to do so.

I will no longer worry about tomorrow. Tomorrow will always be there, waiting for me to make the most of it. But I cannot make the most of tomorrow without first making the most of today.

I will look in the mirror and I will see a person worthy of my respect and admiration. This capable person looking back at me is someone I enjoy spending time with and someone I would like to get to know better.

I will cherish each moment of my life. I value this gift bestowed upon me in this world and I will unselfishly share this gift with others. I will use this gift to enhance the lives of others.

I will take a moment to step off the beaten path and to revel in the mysteries I encounter. I will face challenges with courage and determination. I will overcome what barriers there may be which hinder my quest for growth and self-improvement.

I will take life one day at a time, one step at a time. Discouragement will not be allowed to taint my positive self-image, my desire to succeed or my capacity to love.

I walk with renewed faith in human kindness. Regardless of what has gone before, I believe there is hope for a brighter and better future.

I will open my mind and my heart. I will welcome new experiences. I will meet new people. I will not expect perfection from myself nor anyone else … perfection does not exist in an imperfect world. But I will applaud the attempt to overcome human foibles.

I am responsible for my own happiness and I will do things that make me happy. I will admire the beautiful wonders of nature, listen to my favorite music, pet a kitten or puppy, and soak in a bubble bath. Pleasure can be found in the most simple of gestures.

I will learn something new; I will try something different; I will savor all the various flavors life has to offer. I will change what I can and the rest I will let go. I will strive to become the best me I can possibly be.

I will live life this year in a way that I can look back on it fondly and without regrets and

I WILL MAKE THIS THE BEST YEAR EVER!

~Author Unknown

~~~

A gent from Chicago was on a fishing vacation up north in the Wisconsin woods He was out fishing on a lake in a small boat and not having much luck. He noticed a man in another small boat that was close by, open his tackle box and take out a mirror.

Being curious the man rowed over and enquired, "What is the mirror for?"

"That’s my secret way to catch fish," replied the other man. "I Shine the mirror on the top of the water. The fish notice the spot of sun on the water above and they swim up to the surface. Then I just reach down and net them and pull them into the boat."

"Wow! Does that really work?" exclaimed the guy from Chicago.

"You bet it does." was the response.

"Would you be interested in selling that mirror? I’ll give you $30 for it." offered the big city gent.

"Well, okay." said the country guy.

After the money was transferred, the city fisherman asked, "By the way, how many fish have you caught this week?"

The country local, grinned and said, "You’re the sixth."

~~~

"Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons."

Woody Allen

~~~

"I had the toughest time of my life. First, I got angina pectoris and then arteriosclerosis. Just as I was recovering from these, I got tuberculosis, double pneumonia and phthisis. Then they gave me hypodermics. Appendicitis was followed by tonsillectomy. These gave way to aphasia and hypertrophic cirrhosis. I completely lost my memory for a while. I know I had diabetes and acute ingestion, besides gastritis, rheumatism, lumbago and neuritis. I don’t know how I pulled through it. It was the hardest spelling test I’ve ever had."  

~~~

Act as if what you do makes a difference. It does.

William James

~~~

An old fellow came into the hospital truly on death’s door due to an infected gallbladder. The surgeon who removed the gallbladder was adamant that his patients be up and walking in the hall the day after surgery, to help prevent blood clots forming in the leg veins. The nurses walked the patient in the hall as ordered, and after the third day the nurse told how he complained bitterly each time they did. The surgeon told them to keep walking him.

After a week, the patient was ready to go. His family came to pick him up and thanked the surgeon profusely for what he had done for their father. The surgeon was pleased and appreciated the thanks, but told them that it was really a simple operation and we had been lucky to get him in time. "But doctor, you don’t understand," they said, "Dad hasn’t walked in over a year!"

~~~

"Did you know that hospital gowns come in three sizes?

"Short, shorter, and don’t bend over!"

~~~

In 1990 a woman entered a Haagen-Dazs in the Kansas City Plaza for an ice-cream cone. While she was ordering, another customer entered the store. She placed her order, turned and found herself face to face with Paul Newman. He was in town filming a movie. His blue eyes made her knees buckle. She finished paying and quickly walked out of the store, her heart still pounding. Gaining her composure she suddenly realized she didn’t have her cone; she turned to go back in. At the door she again came face-to-face with Paul Newman who was coming out. He said to her, "Are you looking for your ice-cream cone?" Unable to utter a word she nodded yes. "You put it in your purse with your change."

~~~

If you obey all the rules, you miss all the fun.

Katherine Hepburn

~~~

A blonde is on board a small two seater plane when suddenly the pilot dies. Not knowing how to fly a plane she grabs the radio. "Mayday, Mayday! My pilot just died!" she screams.

Ground control receives her call for help and answers back: "Don’t worry, madam. I’ll talk you down, just do as I say. First I need you to give me your height and position"

"I’m 5"2′ and sitting in the front"

~~~

Don’t bother just to be better than your contemporaries or predecessors.

Try to be better than yourself.

William Faulkner

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

 Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana, USA

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies.

The editor is somewhat senile.

This daily is sent only to special people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can join at http://groups.google.com/group/Rays-Daily. Back issues are posted at http://360.yahoo.com/raykiwsp currently there are about 500 readers from all over the world.

Let me help!

 

 

No one is useless in the world who lightens the burden of it for anyone else.”

Charles Dickens

~~~

When I went to my 360 home page on Sunday I found the following from Dawn:

I know that it is said a person (or family) will not be given more than they can handle but sometimes I have to wonder.

Two and a half years ago we lost my niece.  She was 5 years old and had been in a comatose state for 3 years.  As sad as that occasion was, it was the years of suffering that took its toll on us all.

My sister is an amazing woman.  She was at that baby’s side everyday of her life.  Never spent a single day away from her.  This same sister is the one who gave birth to my new nephew a few weeks ago.  Refer back several blogs and you will see a picture of him.

He is an absolutely beautiful child.  Has all ten fingers and toes.  By all accounts he looks completely perfect.  Like all children he is an angel.  Comes in and steals the hearts of all who come in contact with him…how could he not?!

On Friday our family received the tragic news that this beautiful child has Downs Syndrome.  Now you can understand why I wonder just how much a person can handle.  My heart is broken for my sister.  This is a woman who has a heart of pure gold and doesn’t deserve this.  She deserves to have nothing but pure joy and happiness. 

I am dedicating this blog to my sister Cammie, who has more strength and perseverance than any woman I know…

Dawn

My response was:

I sometimes wonder if more often than not it is those with strength, heart and spirit who are chosen to care for those who cannot care for themselves. To each of us they are an inspiration as well as a reminder of our own frailty. It is up to us to hold their hands, provide love and support, and honor their lives.

My love to her and hers,

Ray

Too many of us bemoan our lives and yet are never tested to see if we are strong enough to carry the heavy burdens bourn by others. I think we can express our gratitude for not being tested by caring for those who are. If nothing else we can help them with their load once in awhile so that they can stop and catch their breath. Let us never forget what others have done for us and use those memories to inspire us to do the same for others.

~~~

“What makes loneliness an anguish is not that I have no one to share my burden, but this:

I have only my own burden to bear.”

Dag Hammarskjold

~~~

A knight and his men return to their castle after a long hard day of fighting.

"How are we faring?" asks the king.

"Sire," replies the knight, "I have been robbing and pillaging on your behalf all day, burning the towns of your enemies in the west."

"What?!?" shrieks the king. "I don’t have any enemies to the west!"

"Oh," says the knight. "Well, you do now."

~~~

"The aging process has you firmly in its grasp if you never get the urge to throw a snowball."

Doug Larson

~~~

Blonde Caller: "Can you give me the telephone number for Jack?"

Operator: "I’m sorry, I don’t understand who you are talking about". Blond Caller: "On page 1 section 5, of the user guide it clearly states that I need to unplug the fax machine from the AC wall socket and telephone Jack before cleaning. Now, can you give me the number for Jack?"

~~~

The president of a large corporation opened his directors meeting by announcing, "All those who are opposed to the plan I am about to propose will reply by saying, ‘I resign’."

~~~

"He’s turned his life around. He used to be depressed and miserable. Now he’s miserable and depressed."

David Frost

~~~

The children begged for a hamster, and after the usual fervent vows that they alone would care for it, they got one.

They named it Danny.  Two months later, when Mom found herself responsible for cleaning and feeding the creature, she located a prospective new home for it.

The children took the news of Danny’s imminent departure quite well, though one of them remarked, "He’s been around here a long time–we’ll miss him."

"Yes," Mom replied, "But he’s too much work for one person, and since I’m that one person, I say he goes."

Another child offered, "Well, maybe if he wouldn’t eat so much and wouldn’t be so messy, we could keep him."

But Mom was firm. "It’s time to take Danny to his new home now," she insisted. "Go and get his cage."

With one voice and in tearful outrage the children shouted, "Danny? We thought you said Daddy!"

~~~

"I have everything I had twenty years ago – except that it is now all lower."

Gypsy Rose Lee

~~~

The Chaplain had been assigned to a large carrier in the Pacific Ocean. It didn’t take him long to notice how much grief the cooks (Mess Specialists) caught from the crew and how they gave back as much as they got. He talked to the Food Service Officer and decided to talk to the cooks and get them to be more cheerful when they served the meals to the sailors coming down the line. "A smile and a cheerful comment, a willingness to serve them will reap great benefits," he told them.

After his pep talk the Food Service Officer and the Chaplain stood back and watched the food being served. A new sailor aboard walked down the line but he didn’t like anything he saw so he just carried his tray down the line till he got to the desert section. He picked up a saucer containing a large piece of chocolate cake.

The Mess Specialist looked at him, "Is that all you’re gonna eat," he asked.

The sailor said, "Yeah, the rest of it don’t look too appetizing."

The Mess Specialist smiled and said, "Well, in that case would you like two pieces of cake?"

The Chaplain smiled and hit the Food Service Officer in the ribs,

"I told you my talk did them some good."

The kid said, "Yeah, man, I’d appreciate it."

The cook leaned over and cut the piece of cake on the tray in half.

~~~

Two things a man should never be angry at: what he can help, and what he cannot help.

Thomas Fuller

~~~

A woman on a holiday trip stood in awe in front of an enormous tree.

"Oh, marvelous and ancient oak," she enthused, "if you could only speak, what would you want to say to me?"

A woman standing nearby commented, "It probably would say, "Pardon me, madam, I am an elm."

~~~

 “The value of compassion cannot be over-emphasized. Anyone can criticize. It takes a true believer to be compassionate. No greater burden can be borne by an individual than to know no one cares or understands.”

Arthur H. Stainback

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

 Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana, USA

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies.

The editor is somewhat senile.

This daily is sent only to special people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can join at http://groups.google.com/group/Rays-Daily. Back issues are posted at http://360.yahoo.com/raykiwsp currently there are about 500 readers from all over the world.

Let’s go play!

Enjoy Yourself

 

 

“You must not know too much or be too precise or scientific about birds and trees and flowers and watercraft; a certain free-margin, and even vagueness – ignorance, credulity – helps your enjoyment of these things.”

Henry David Thoreau

~~~

This morning I started off thinking about how we might enjoy this weekend. As I stumbled around the internet gathering my thoughts I came upon the above quote from Thoreau. In a way it is counter to so much that is ingrained in us, our inbred need to use our intellect to understand the science of all we see. I am glad that there are those like Thoreau who offer more. As I thought about it I realized that I, like many others, value feeling more than an intellectual understanding of what I see.

I recently attended an art seminar where there was much discussion about the art that was displayed. I felt very uncomfortable as others worked to understand through what they saw, what the artist felt, what techniques he used and the underlying meaning of it all. They we so into the science and the precise details that I felt they could not see the painting. And I was basking in the feelings triggered by what I saw others missed a great opportunity for enjoyment.

Maybe we should spend this weekend role-playing a five year old child. Let us leave behind all they have taught us and see the world with unfiltered eyes. Let us be overwhelmed with the color of the garden and the smell of a rose. Let us lie on the grass and watch the sky as it puts on its daily show. Lets walk hand in hand just seeing and feeling. Let us especially notice the faces of the people we see, the smiles, the tears, the rosy cheeks of the child, and the earned wrinkles of the elderly. I might even stop for a minute and imagine what the life behind the face has been. And you know what? We don’t have to be right and we don’t have to know chemical composition of what we see. It is not important if what we think is accurate or what it all means, for everything we let ourselves feel will be right, maybe for some of us more right than things have been in a long time.

So break out your coloring books, lie on the rug with me and color a few pages before we go out to visit the land of Peter Pan.

~~~

“The most effective kind of education is that a child should play amongst lovely things.”

Plato

~~~

You Know Your Life Sucks When…

A black cat crosses your path and drops dead.

You take an assertiveness training course and you’re afraid to tell your wife.

The candles on your cake set off your smoke alarm.

You have to take out a loan just to get money to make the first payment.

Your children’s school calls to surrender.

The bride’s family throws rocks instead of rice.

Your wife wraps your lunch in a road map.

Your plants do better when you *don’t* talk to them.

~~~

"The trouble with weather forecasting is that it’s right too often for us to ignore it and wrong too often for us to rely on it."

Patrick Young

~~~

Over breakfast recently, my sister said to her husband, "I bet you don’t know what day this is."

"Of course I do," he indignantly answered, as he went out the door, heading to the office.

At 10 AM, the doorbell rang, and when my Sis opened the door, she was handed a box containing a dozen long stemmed red roses.

At 1 PM, a foil wrapped, two pound box of her favorite chocolates arrived.

Later, a boutique delivered a designer dress.

My sister couldn’t wait for her husband to come home. "First the flowers, then the chocolates, and then the dress!" she exclaimed.

Then grinning like a Cheshire cat, said, "I’ve never had a more wonderful Groundhog Day in my life!"

~~~

"Too bad the only people who know how to run the country are busy driving cabs and cutting hair."

George Burns

~~~

YOU KNOW YOU’RE A MOM WHEN…

* Your feet stick to grape jelly on the kitchen floor–and you don’t care.  

* When the kids are fighting, you threaten to lock them in a room together and not let them out until someone’s bleeding.  

* You can’t find your cordless phone, so you ask a friend to call you, and you run around the house madly, following the sound until you locate the phone downstairs in the laundry basket.  

* Your idea of a good day is making it through without a child leaking bodily fluids on you.  

* Popsicle’s become a food staple.  

* Your favorite television show is a cartoon.  

* You’re willing to kiss your child’s boo-boo, regardless of what body part it happens to be on.  

* You’re so desperate for adult conversation that you spill your guts to the telemarketer that calls and HE hangs up on YOU!  

* Spit is your number one cleaning agent.  

* You buy cereal with marshmallows in it.  

* You count the sprinkles on each kid’s cupcake to make sure they’re equal.  

* You have time to shave only one leg at a time.  

* You hide in the bathroom to be alone.  

* Your kid throws up and you catch it.  

* You cling to the high moral ground on toy weapons; but your child chews his toast into the shape of a gun anyway.

* You get up at 5:30 AM and you have no time to eat, sleep, drink or go to the bathroom, and yet … you still managed to gain 10 pounds.  

~~~

"On my income tax 1040 it says ‘Check this box if you are blind.’ I wanted to put a check mark about three inches away."

Tom Lehrer

~~~

A woman went to a computer dating service and said she didn’t care about looks, income or background. All she wanted was a man of upright character.

Then a man came in and told them the only thing he was seeking in a woman was intelligence.

The service matched them together at once because they had one thing in common — they were both pathological liars.

~~~

Never put off until tomorrow what you can forget about forever.

~~~

One night recently, my phone rang several times throughout the evening. Each time, a woman’s voice asked for Ben. Each time I politely explained that I lived alone, my name wasn’t Ben, and she had a wrong number. The fifth time she called, I had had enough.

"Hello"? I said.

"Can I speak to Ben, please"?

I replied, "I’m sorry, he’s not in right now. Can I take a message"?

"Do you know what time he’ll be back"? she responded.

"I think he said he’d be home around 10:00."

Silence on the other end…a confused silence.

"Is this Steve"?

"Yes, it is. Do you want to leave a message for Ben"?

"Well, he said he would be home tonight and asked me to call him," she said in a slightly irritated voice.

I replied, "Well, he went out with Karen about an hour ago and said that he would be back at 10:00."

A shocked voice now, "Who’s Karen"?

"The girl he went out with."

"I know that! I mean…who is she"?

"I don’t know her last name. Look, do you want me to leave a message for Ben"?

"Yes. Please do. Tell him to call me when he gets home."

She was sounding pretty irate at this point. "I sure will. Is this Jennifer"?

She exploded, "Who’s Jennifer"? Apparently she wasn’t.

"Well, he’s going out with Jennifer at 10:00. I thought you were her. Sorry, it was an honest mistake."

"Ben’s the one that’s made the mistake! Tell him that Alice called him and that she’s very upset and that I would like him to call me as soon as he gets home."

I smiled and said, "Okay, I will, but Becky isn’t going to like this…"

~~~

One night recently, my phone rang several times throughout the evening. Each time, a woman’s voice asked for Ben. Each time I politely explained that I lived alone, my name wasn’t Ben, and she had a wrong number. The fifth time she called, I had had enough.

"Hello"? I said.

"Can I speak to Ben, please"?

I replied, "I’m sorry, he’s not in right now. Can I take a message"?

"Do you know what time he’ll be back"? she responded.

"I think he said he’d be home around 10:00."

Silence on the other end…a confused silence.

"Is this Steve"?

"Yes, it is. Do you want to leave a message for Ben"?

"Well, he said he would be home tonight and asked me to call him," she said in a slightly irritated voice.

I replied, "Well, he went out with Karen about an hour ago and said that he would be back at 10:00."

A shocked voice now, "Who’s Karen"?

"The girl he went out with."

"I know that! I mean…who is she"?

"I don’t know her last name. Look, do you want me to leave a message for Ben"?

"Yes. Please do. Tell him to call me when he gets home."

She was sounding pretty irate at this point. "I sure will. Is this Jennifer"?

She exploded, "Who’s Jennifer"? Apparently she wasn’t.

"Well, he’s going out with Jennifer at 10:00. I thought you were her. Sorry, it was an honest mistake."

"Ben’s the one that’s made the mistake! Tell him that Alice called him and that she’s very upset and that I would like him to call me as soon as he gets home."

I smiled and said, "Okay, I will, but Becky isn’t going to like this…"

~~~

Everything has beauty, but not everyone sees it.

Confucius

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

 Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana, USA

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies.

The editor is somewhat senile.

This daily is sent only to special people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can join at http://groups.google.com/group/Rays-Daily. Back issues are posted at http://360.yahoo.com/raykiwsp currently there are about 500 readers from all over the world.

Too Busy?

 

“Beware the barrenness of a busy life.”

Socrates

~~~

I have had a number of opportunities over the last few months to spend time with people who wanted to get a better handle on their lives so that they would be free to get on with all the future has to offer. Since I am running behind today I went back into the archives where I store old dailies and found this that discusses the problem. Ray

It seems to me that too many of us spend most, if not all of our time, doing things we think we must do, allowing little time for what we would like to do. Our lives become cluttered with one thing after another that eat up our days, weeks, months and even years. We think we have to do what we always have done, we believe that we must always say yes when someone wants us to do something, we think we must have the biggest garden and the most beautiful Christmas decorations. We feel we must attend every one of our grandchildren’s sporting events, we feel that we must cook for the church super, that we must read every magazine we get, and that we must never miss an episode of a favorite TV series; the list goes on and on and on. We do lots of things that are OK but few things that really give us joy. If we just stop and think about it we discover we seldom get to do some of the things we would love to do because we have convinced ourselves that there is not time enough to do them.

I think the worst form of procrastination is when we put off taking care of ourselves. It is perfectly alright to do what we would like to do, it is perfectly alright to reward ourselves, and it is perfectly alright to stop doing something that stands in our way of doing what we want to do. You know, if you miss that one game, skip that one magazine, or keep a garden that requires less of your time, the world does not end. It is worthwhile to ask yourself every chance you get, if what you are doing is really that important and if you did not do it, who would it hurt.

Why not pick one or two things right now that you would like to do. I have always felt that the best time to take a vacation was when you can’t, that is when you need to be recharged the most. It is the same with everything else, the best time to do for ourselves is now, and it is up to us to eliminate what keeps us from enjoying the rest of our lives. The next time I hear from you I would love to hear that things are great and not just ok.

~~~

“While I am busy with little things, I am not required to do greater things.”

St. Francis de Sales

~~~

"You Know You’re From New York When…"

* You’re 35 years old and don’t have a driver’s license.

* You ride in a subway car with no air conditioning just because there are seats available.

* You take the train home and you know exactly where on the platform the doors will open that will leave you right in front of the exit stairway.

* You know what a "regular" coffee is.

* It’s not Manhattan., It’s the "city".

* There is no north and south. It’s "uptown" or "downtown." If you’re really from New York you have absolutely no concept of where north and south are…. And east or west is "crosstown."

* You move 3,000 miles away, spend 10 years learning the local language and people still know you’re from Brooklyn the minute you open your  mouth.

* You get ready to order dinner every night and must choose from the major food groups which are: Chinese, Italian, Mexican or Indian.

* You’re not the least bit interested in going to Times Square on New Year’s eve.

* Someone bumps into you, and you check for your wallet.

~~~

There is a wisdom of the head, and a wisdom of the heart.

Charles Dickens

~~~

As in many homes on New Year’s Day, my wife and I faced the annual conflict of which was more important – the football games on television or the dinner itself. To keep peace, I ate dinner with the rest of the family, and even lingered for some pleasant after dinner conversation before retiring to the family room to turn on the game.

Several minutes later, my wife came downstairs and graciously even bought a cold drink for me. She smiled, kissed me on the cheek and asked what the score was. I told her it was the end of the third quarter and that the score was still nothing to nothing.

"See"? She said, continuing to smile, "You didn’t miss a thing."

~~~

"Looking through the want ads last week, I came across a job that required a college degree or the equivalent. Finally, I thought, my eight years of high school are paying off."  

Buzz Nutley

~~~

A group of bats, hanging at the ceiling of a cave, discovers a single bat STANDING upright underneath on the floor of the cave. Surprised by this unusual behavior, they ask this fellow: "What the heck are you doing down there?"

And the fellow shouts back: "Yoga!"

~~~

"If we don’t change direction soon, we’ll end up where we’re going."

Professor Irwin Corey

~~~

She said: I was out walking with my then 4 year old daughter. She picked up something off the ground and started to put it in her mouth. I asked her not to do that.

"Why?"

"Because it’s been laying outside and it is dirty and Probably has germs." At this point, she looked at me with total admiration And asked, "Wow!  How do you know all this stuff?" Ooh," I was thinking quickly, "…all moms know this Stuff. Um, it’s on the Mommy Test. You have to Know it, or they don’t let you be a Mommy."

We walked along in silence for 2 or 3 minutes, but she was evidently pondering this new information. "OH…I get it!" she beamed, "So if you flunk, you have to be the Daddy."

~~~

"Men have become the tools of their tools."

Henry David Thoreau

~~~

A crusty old Sergeant Major found himself at a gala event, hosted by a local liberal arts college.

There was no shortage of extremely young, idealistic ladies in attendance, one of whom approached the Sergeant Major for conversation. She said, "Excuse me, Sergeant Major, but you seem to be a very serious man. Is something bothering you?"

"Negative, ma’am," the Sergeant Major said,  "Just serious by nature."

The young lady looked at his awards and decorations and said, "It looks like you have seen a lot of action."

The Sergeant Major’s short reply was,  "Yes, ma’am, a lot of action."

The young lady, tiring of trying to start up a conversation, said, "You know, you should lighten up a little. Relax and enjoy yourself."

The Sergeant Major just stared at her in his serious manner.

Finally the young lady said, "You know, I hope you don’t take this the wrong way, but when is the last time you had sex?"

The Sergeant Major looked at her and replied, "1955."

She said, "Well, there you are. You really need to chill out and quit taking everything so seriously! I mean, no sex since 1955! Isn’t that a little extreme?"

The Sergeant Major, glancing at his watch, said in his matter-of-fact voice, "You think so?  It’s only 2130 now."

~~~

“Often happiness calls but we are too busy to answer.”

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

 Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana, USA

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies.

The editor is somewhat senile.

This daily is sent only to special people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can join at http://groups.google.com/group/Rays-Daily. Back issues are posted at http://360.yahoo.com/raykiwsp currently there are about 500 readers from all over the world.

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