Ray's musings and humor

Archive for March, 2020

We Do It Again

Ray’s Daily

March 31, 2020

http://rays-daily.com

We have always held to the hope, the belief, the conviction that there is a better life, a better world, beyond the horizon.

Franklin D. Roosevelt

positive-attitude

Here we go again, another day of isolation. I have decided that there is little use focusing on what we can’t do, we are much better off focusing on what we can do. In my case I am reading more, thinking some, reminiscing a little, learning more and enjoying some movies with my wife.

I hope you too are making the best of these difficult times. It does little good to be negative. We just have to wait it out working to make sure we are part of the solution rather than wandering out and potentially becoming part of the problem. I do wish us all well.

Here is a short story I just picked up about life in self-imposed quarantine,

And the People Stayed Home

By Kitty O’Meara

And the people stayed home. And read books, and listened, and rested, and exercised, and made art, and played games, and learned new ways of being, and were still. And listened more deeply. Some meditated, some prayed, some danced. Some met their shadows. And the people began to think differently.

And the people healed. And, in the absence of people living in ignorant, dangerous, mindless, and heartless ways, the earth began to heal.

And when the danger passed, and the people joined together again, they grieved their losses, and made new choices, and dreamed new images, and created new ways to live and heal the earth fully, as they had been healed.

~~~

Hope is being able to see that there is light despite all of the darkness.

Desmond Tutu

~~~

Two guys in a bar…

One says “Did your hear the news – Mike is dead!”

“Wooo, what the hell happened to him?”

“Well he was on his way over to my house the other day and when he arrived outside the house he didn’t brake properly and boom – He hit the pavement and the car flips up and he crashed through the sunroof – Went flying through the air and smashed through my upstairs bedroom window.”

“What a horrible way to die!”

“No no, he survived that, that didn’t kill him at all. So, he’s landed in my upstairs bedroom and he’s all covered in broken glass on the floor. Then, he spots the big old antique wardrobe we have in the room and reaches up for the handle to try to pull himself up. He’s just dragging himself up when bang, this massive wardrobe comes crashing down on top of him, crushing him and breaking most of his bones.”

“What a way to go, that’s terrible!”

“No no, that didn’t kill him he survived that. He managed to get the wardrobe off him and crawls out onto the landing, he tries to pull himself up on the banister but under his weight, the banister breaks and he goes falling down on to the first floor. In mid air, all the broken banister poles spin and fall on him, pinning him to the floor, sticking right through him.”

“Now that is the most unfortunate way to go!”

“No no, that didn’t kill him, he even survived that. So he’s on the downstairs landing, just beside the kitchen. He crawls in to the kitchen, tries to pull himself up on the cooker, but reached for a big pot of boiling hot water, whoosh, the whole thing came down on him and burned most of his skin off him.”

“Man, what a way to go!”

“No no, he survived that, he survived that ! He’s lying on the ground, covered in boiling water and he spots the phone and tries to pull himself up, to call for help, but instead he grabs the light switch and pulls the whole thing off the wall and the water and electricity didn’t mix and so he got electrocuted, wallop, 10,000 volts shot through him.”

“Now that is one awful way to go!”

“No no, he survived that, he …”

“Hold on now, just how the hell did he die?”

“I shot him!”

“You shot him? What the hell did you shoot him for?”

“He was wrecking my house.”

~~~

There are many ways to measure success; not the least of which is the way your child describes you when talking to a friend.

Unknown

~~~

Bill took Jack to a celebratory dinner at a really fine restaurant.

They walked in, were ushered to a table by a formally dressed maitre d’, and sat down at a table on which were displayed the finest china and crystal. Taking the damask napkin from the solid silver napkin ring, Jack unfolded it, put it around his neck and proceeded to tie a knot in the back.

Staring at him, the maitre d’ said, between gritted teeth, “Sir, will you be having a shave or a haircut?”

~~~

People asked me what I’d most appreciate getting for my eighty-seventh birthday. I tell them, a paternity suit.”

George Burns

~~~

Little Johnny wasn’t getting good marks in school. One day he surprised the teacher with an announcement.

He tapped her on the shoulder and said, “I don’t want to scare you, but my daddy says if I don’t start getting better grades… somebody is going to get a spanking!”

~~~

You may not always have a comfortable life and you will not always be able to solve all of the world’s problems at once but don’t ever underestimate the importance you can have because history has shown us that courage can be contagious and hope can take on a life of its own.

Michelle Obama

~~~

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at http://rays-daily,com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

 

 

BetterDays Ahead

Ray’s Daily

March 30, 2020

HTTP://rays-daily.com

“For myself I am an optimist – it does not seem to be much use to be anything else.”

Winston Churchill

stay positive

I know that there will come a day when the Coranavirus epidemic will end. I am learning that staying isolated is not easy. It is like we were being jailed, or food is brought to us, we are not Allowed visitors nad we no longer mix with friends.

The good news is that my wife and I are still together. I know how my I benefited from all the help provided by my family. I am grateful to them, the staff where I live, and to you who keep in touch.

I am optimistic that this too will pass and we will be together again. In the meantime I will continue to appreciate the past good times and those to come. The following abridged article reminded me of what I have found in my older friends.

How Optimism May Keep You Alive Longer

BY KIRA M. NEWMAN

According to a new study, one secret to a long life might be wholly unrelated to what we eat or how much we exercise: our optimism. Researchers examined long-term surveys of more than 69,000 women and 1,400 men. Both groups reported how optimistic they were: whether they expected good or bad things to happen to them in the future, and if they felt in control of important aspects of their life.

Who was still alive by the end of the study? As it turns out, more optimistic people tended to have a longer lifespan. The most optimistic survived 10-15 percent longer than the least optimistic. The most optimistic also had a better chance of living to age 85—perhaps not as impressive as the fabled centenarians, but that’s still considered “exceptional longevity.”

“Optimism may be an important psychosocial resource in promoting healthy aging,” the researchers write.

While previous studies have found that optimists are protected against premature death, this is the first to examine the “exceptional longevity” that people strive for. And it complements other research suggesting that happy people—people who demonstrate more positive emotions or are more satisfied with life—may also live longer.

These findings might not seem like good news to those of us who aren’t natural optimists. But perhaps that’s my knee-jerk pessimism talking. Luckily, research suggests that optimism is something we can cultivate—by practicing gratitude, envisioning our “Best Possible Self,” or doing certain types of therapy. And that makes the future look a little bit rosier.

~~~

“We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.”

Oscar Wilde

~~~

RULES OF THE AIR (from Australian Aviation magazine):

  1. Every takeoff is optional. Every landing is mandatory.
  2. If you push the stick forward, the houses get bigger. If you pull the stick back, they get smaller. That is, unless you keep pulling the stick all the way back, then they get bigger again.
  3. Flying isn’t dangerous. Crashing is what’s dangerous.
  4. It’s always better to be down here wishing you were up there than up there wishing you were down here.
  5. The ONLY time you have too much fuel is when you’re on fire.
  6. The propeller is just a big fan in front of the plane used to keep the pilot cool. When it stops, you can actually watch the pilot start sweating.
  7. When in doubt, hold on to your altitude. No-one has ever collided with the sky.
  8. A ‘good’ landing is one from which you can walk away. A ‘great’ landing is one after which they can use the plane again.
  9. Learn from the mistakes of others. You won’t live long enough to make all of them yourself.
  10. You know you’ve landed with the wheels up if it takes full power to taxi to the ramp.
  11. The probability of survival is inversely proportional to the angle of arrival. Large angle of arrival, small probability of survival and vice versa.
  12. Never let an aircraft take you somewhere your brain didn’t get to five minutes earlier.
  13. Stay out of clouds. The silver lining everyone keeps talking about might be another airplane going in the opposite direction. Reliable sources also report that mountains have been known to hide out in clouds.
  14. Always try to keep the number of landings you make equal to the number of take offs you’ve made.
  15. There are three simple rules for making a smooth landing. Unfortunately no one knows what they are.
  16. You start with a bag full of luck and an empty bag of experience. The trick is to fill the bag of experience before you empty the bag of luck.
  17. Helicopters can’t fly; they’re just so ugly the earth repels them.
  18. If all you can see out of the window is ground that’s going round and round and all you can hear is commotion coming from the passenger compartment, things are not at all as they should be.
  19. In the ongoing battle between objects made of aluminum going hundreds of miles per hour and the ground going zero miles per hour, the ground has yet to lose.
  20. Good judgment comes from experience. Unfortunately, the experience usually comes from bad judgment.
  21. It’s always a good idea to keep the pointy end going forward.
  22. Keep looking around. There’s always something you’ve missed.
  23. Remember, gravity is not just a good idea. It’s the law. And it’s not subject to repeal.
  24. The three most useless things to a pilot are the altitude above you, runway behind you, and a tenth of a second ago.
  25. There are old pilots and there are bold pilots. There are, however, no old, bold pilots.

~~~

“Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored.”

Aldous Huxley

~~~

In California’s Sonoma Valley, where vineyards cater to wine snobbery, a woman phoned the classified ad department of a newspaper. She offered for sale what sounded like “well-aged Caumeneur.”

The ad-taker was unfamiliar with that particular wine, but was used to the infusion of French words into the local vocabulary.

“Could you please spell that?” she asked.

“You know,” said the woman impatiently, “C-o-w M-a-n-u-r-e.”

~~~

“When a man’s best friend is his dog, that dog has a problem.”

Edward Abbey

~~~

She said: Prior to our wedding, David and I met with the minister to discuss our marriage ceremony and various traditions, such as lighting the unity candle from two individual candles.

Couples usually blow out the two candles as a sign of becoming one. Our minister said that many people were now leaving their individual candles lit to signify independence and personal freedom. He asked if we wanted to extinguish our candles or leave them burning.

After thinking about it, David replied, “How about if we leave mine lit and blow out hers?”

~~~

Dogs are wise. They crawl away into a quiet corner and lick their wounds and do not rejoin the world until they are whole once more.

Agatha Christie

~~~

An old man was relaxing at his hundredth birthday party when a reporter went up to him.

“Sir, what is the secret of your long life?”

The man considered this for a moment, then replied “every day at 9 PM I have a glass of port. Good for the heart I’ve heard.”

The reporter replied, “That’s ALL?”

The man smiled, “That, and canceling my voyage on Titanic.”

~~~

“Life is too short to spend your precious time trying to convince a person who wants to live in gloom and doom otherwise. Give lifting that person your best shot, but don’t hang around long enough for his or her bad attitude to pull you down. Instead, surround yourself with optimistic people.”

Zig Ziglar

~~~

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at http://rays-daily,com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

 

 

Happy?

Ray’s Daily

March 27, 2020

http://rays-daily.com

“Happiness depends upon ourselves.”

Aristotle

Happiness

It is Friday and there is nothing to report. Nancy and I continue our isolated living watching television and napping. I am going to get a Daily from better days today. Stay well and I will see you Monday.

Ray’s Daily first published on March 27, 2014

I am generally a happy person and am glad that I seem to have developed a life that is pretty good. What I can’t understand are the folks I meet who seem unhappy most of the time. Many of these people don’t really want to be that way they just don’t seem to know how to change. In my experience happiness can be contagious but since few happy people hang around those who are always complaining about their plight not much happiness rubs off on the people who need help.

Fortunately, all is not lost for it is never too late to discover how to be happy. A while ago I was sent a copy of an article written by Angel Chernoff that reported on the characteristics of happy people, the content may help someone to start on the path to more joy in their life. Here is a shortened version of what she wrote:

7 Sexy Character Traits of Happy People

  1. Moral Courage – Happy people stand up for what’s right and don’t get pushed around by peer pressure into the newest fad or trend.  They have the courage, conviction and inner strength to do what’s right even while others reshape themselves into ever-shifting expressions of someone else’s standards, becoming shadows of other’s values.
  2. Self-Confidence – Happiness requires a degree of confidence that allows us to believe we have value, that we are worthy of love and friendship and success.  Happy people have faith in themselves and in their ability to develop the skills and qualities needed to become highly competent at living life well.

Keep in mind, though, that it’s not the pseudo-confidence that hides insecurities under cocky exteriors that shout their accomplishments and exaggerate their strengths and experiences.  It’s a humble self-acceptance and self-love that genuinely feels comfortable in their own skin.

  1. Thoughtfulness – They say nice people finish last, but that’s just not true.  As a matter of fact, jerks are never completely trusted or respected by people who respect themselves.  Happy people are thoughtful people.  They consider the needs of others.  Making a difference, in fact, takes center stage in their lives; it’s an important part of their self-identity.
  2. Passion – Happiness at its highest level includes living a life of passion and purpose.  Happy lives are directed lives, pointed at something deeply meaningful.  The happiest amongst us are excited about living because every day offers them another opportunity to do what they love, because truly passionate people have many interests, they are rarely bored, adrift or indolent.
  3. Self-Responsible – Have you ever met a happy person who regularly evades responsibility, blames and points fingers and makes excuses for their unsatisfying lives?  Me either.  Happy people accept responsibility for how their lives unfold.  They believe their own happiness is a byproduct of their own thinking, beliefs, attitudes, character and behavior.
  4. Honest – Liars hide from the truth.  They lack the courage to stand up to the reality of their lives.  They hide behind words and camouflage – their hidden agenda behind a web of stories and verbal slights of hand.  Happy people don’t live that way.  Honesty is a hallmark of the happiest amongst us.  It is also a characteristic of the dangerously sexy.
  5. Self-accepting – Happy people are authentic.  They are real and know who they are and what they like.  They are in touch with their feelings and spend time learning and growing and developing.  Self-accepting people may forgive themselves of their own shortcomings, but they don’t excuse them.

They look their weaknesses square in the eye, accept them as they are, then go to work growing and improving and transforming them into strengths.  Self-acceptance is never used as an excuse for stagnation or laziness or apathy by the truly self-accepting.

~~~

“So we shall let the reader answer this question for himself: who is the happier man, he who has braved the storm of life and lived or he who has stayed securely on shore and merely existed?”

Hunter S. Thompson

~~~

The Rosenthals had an outstandingly happy and successful marriage, and Mr. Rosenthal was once asked to what he attributed this remarkable situation.

“It’s simple,” he said. “Division of labor. My wife makes all the small, routine decisions. She decides what house we buy, where we go on vacation, whether the kids go to private schools, if I should change my job, and so on.”

“And you?”

“I make the big, fundamental decisions. I decide if the United States should declare war on China, if Congress should appropriate money for a manned expedition to Mars, and so on.”

~~~

If you can’t be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.

~~~

A hospital posted a notice in the nurses’ lounge saying:

“Remember, the first five minutes of a human being’s life are the most dangerous.”

Underneath, a nurse had written:

“The last five are pretty risky, too.”

~~~

The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement.

~~~

A big-game hunter went on safari with his wife and mother-in-law. One evening, while still deep in the jungle, the Mrs awoke to find her mother gone. Rushing to her husband, she insisted on them both trying to find her mother.

The hunter picked up his rifle, took a swig of whiskey, and started to look for her. In a clearing not far from the camp, they came upon a chilling sight: the mother-in-law was backed up against a thick, impenetrable bush, and a large male lion stood facing her.

The wife cried, “What are we going to do?”

“Nothing,” said the hunter husband. “The lion got himself into this mess, let him get himself out of it.”

~~~

“He had delusions of adequacy.”

Walter Kerr

~~~

The teacher was giving her second grade students a lesson in science. She had explained about magnets and showed how they would pick up nails and other bits of iron.

Now, it was question time and she asked, “My name begins with the letter M and I pick up things. What am I?”

A little boy in the front row said, “You’re a mother.”

~~~

“Cry. Forgive. Learn. Move on. Let your tears water the seeds of your future happiness.”

Steve Maraboli

~~~

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at http://rays-daily,com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

 

 

Remember the Good Times

Ray’s Daily

March 26, 2020

http://rays-daily.com

Unless you have bad times, you can’t appreciate the good times.

Joe Torre

remember-time-wor

As of today, our residence dining room is closed and our food is beaning delivered to our apartment. We are better off than many as we hove food to eat and each other’s company.

One, if there is one, benefits of this isolation is that we all will realize how good our lives have been. If you are like I am you now know how important the little things really are. I miss visiting with friends, I miss being able to go to a theatre and see a play. I even miss going to the grocery store where I impulse shop. I know that when we return to some semblance of normalcy that I will pay more attention to those things that make life enjoyable.

In case you are having problems dealing with the isolation I have included below excerpts from a recent ARRP article that may help.

Coping with Isolation During the Coronavirus Outbreak

by Aaron Kassraie, AARP

With older Americans being instructed to stay home and avoid contact with others to deter the spread of COVID-19, feelings of isolation are naturally emerging — especially among those who are home alone. We asked Val Walker, an expert on coping with isolation for practical advice on ways to stay connected and maintain mental and emotional health.

How can we avoid feelings of isolation while stuck at home? – Find one person with whom you can share your own worries and feelings over the phone. In these challenging times, it is perfectly natural to feel afraid, lonely or overwhelmed.

What are the best ways to connect with friends and family using technology? – Many older adults use videoconferencing such as Skype, FaceTime and Zoom. This allows for conversations to happen — and in these times, we need to have good conversations and “think out loud” as we cope with coronavirus issues. It can be helpful for a family member or friend to teach how to use these services and apps. Other suggestions include reaching out the old-fashioned way with greeting cards and letters, and sending text messages or emails with your photos and checking in.

  • Reach out to your local community services phone line such as 211 or 311. You can ask for a referral to a support line to discuss how you are feeling.• To find other support for feelings of isolation and loneliness, visit n4a.org, call 800-677-1116.

~~~

Thank you for the good times, the days you filled with pleasure. Thank you for fond memories, and for feelings I’ll always treasure.

Karl Fuchs

~~~

“Excerpts From The Dog’s Daily Diary”

8:00 am – Oh Boy! Dog food! My favorite!

9:30 am – Oh Boy! A car ride! My favorite!

9:40 am – Oh Boy! A walk! My favorite!

10:30 am – Oh Boy! A car ride! My favorite!

11:30 am – Oh Boy! Dog food! My favorite!

12:00 noon – Oh Boy! The kids! My favorite!

1:00 pm – Oh Boy! The yard! My favorite!

4:00 pm – Oh Boy! The kids! My favorite!

5:00 pm – Oh Boy! Dog food! My favorite!

5:30 pm – Oh Boy! Mom! My favorite!

6:00 pm – Oh Boy! Playing ball! My favorite!

6:30 pm – Oh Boy! Sleeping in master’s bed! My favorite!

~~~

A good wife always forgives her husband when she’s wrong.

~~~

To get acquainted with his new Parish, the Priest decided to call on some daily. One he selected was a young widow, her husband, according to the index card, had died two years ago. After knocking at the door, he was greeted by a young lady with a baby in her arms.

He said, “I’m sorry, I must have the wrong address, I was looking for the widow Laffitte.”

“You’ve found her, Father.” smiled the lady.

“Well, according to the card here, it says your husband died over two years ago.” he said glancing at the baby in her arms.

“That’s correct, Father. He surely did …but I didn’t!”

~~~

“I think animal testing is a terrible idea; they get all nervous and give the wrong answers.”

Joseph Blosephina

~~~

Top Ten Signs You’re Being Stalked by Martha Stewart

  1. You get a threatening note made up of letters cut out of a magazine with pinking shears, and they’re all the same size, the same font, and precisely lined up in razor-sharp rows.
  2. You find a lemon slice in the dog’s water bowl.
  3. On her TV show she makes a gingerbread house that looks exactly like your split-level, right down to the fallen licorice downspout and the half-open graham cracker garage door.
  4. You find your pet bunny on the stove in an exquisite tarragon,rose

petal & saffron demi-glace’, with pecan-crusted hearts of palm and adelicate mint-fennel sauce.

  1. The unmistakable aroma of potpourri follows you even after you leave the bathroom.
  2. You discover that every napkin in the entire house has been folded into a swan.
  3. No matter “where” you eat, your place setting always includes an oyster fork.
  4. Twice this week you’ve been the victim of a drive-by doilying.
  5. You wake up in the hospital with a concussion and endive stuffing in every orifice.

AND THE NUMBER 1 Sign You’re Being Stalked by Martha Stewart…

  1. You awaken one morning with a glue gun pointed squarely at your temple.

~~~

“Experience is the name every one gives to their mistakes.”

Oscar Wilde

~~~

My friend’s mother is a proper Southern lady and a passionate gardener who spends hours outside with her plants. In her neighborhood, where she has lived most of her life, no one has fences and every yard is open to the next.

Recently one of her longtime neighbors, an elderly man, moved away. “Are you going to miss him?” my friend asked.

“Actually I’m relieved,” her mother replied. “Now I can bend over.”

~~~

Good times are a reminder and a reward for dealing with the difficult and challenging times we all go through. The trick is to celebrate the good times in advance of the difficult times. Always remember, good times await you after the difficult times pass.    

James A. Murphy

~~~

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at http://rays-daily,com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

 

 

This Too WEill Pass

Ray’s Daily

March 25, 2020

http://rays-daily.com

Stay positive, all other choices are pointless punishments to your psyche.

Joe Peterson

Stay Strong

So, how is it where you are? Here in Indiana they have pretty much shut us down. If you are not an essential worker you are required to hibernate and stay home.

It would be easy to become pessimistic these days but that does us no good. If we get down chances are we will take others down as well. In my case, while it is not easy. I also know that this too will pass. We are alive, we have our friends and each other and that is more than most have in our world.

Let’s take this time to truly appreciate what we do have and don’t spend time on what we don’t have. Here are excerpts from an article that I suggest we all consider while we have the time to do so.

Ways to Learn to Love Yourself and Be Happy

Jade Nyx

Cast out of the Idea That You Have to Be Perfect – You are never going to be perfect. But the good news is, you already are perfect, in your imperfection.

Understand That Societies’ Expectations of You Are an Unrealistic Standard That Can Never Be Met – Don’t compare yourself or your life to that unrealistic standard, it only leads to self hate and depression: The More We Compare, the More We Lose Ourselves

Live in the Moment, Just for a Moment Every Day – See where you have come from and appreciate the beauty of the moment that YOU ARE ALIVE — Living, breathing, functioning human being and how much of a luxury that is.

Embrace the Fact That You Can’t Control Everything – Instead of trying to control everything and everyone, do the best you can do and then put your hands up and say ” it is in the hands of the God’s now” and leave it to work itself out.

Self-Care – Get over trying to be “Good” and take care of yourself. Self care = Happiness.

Face Your Negative Thoughts – Before you say anything negative, ask yourself, does this thought benefit me in any way? Does this thought make me better in some way? Or is it just rude, belittling and cruel.

Tighten Your Circle – Your social circle affects your whole life. You don’t owe anyone anything so if someone is dragging you down like a really negative friend. Ditch, Avoid, Move On. It is your life.

Remember Who You Are – You have been through a lot and you have come through it, getting stronger and stronger every time.

Clear up Your Environment – Clear out all those negative people on social media. All of those relatable memes about underachieving alcoholics.

What you put in your mind becomes your life, therefore it is only logical that you fill your mind with positive information, and you will have a positive life.

~~~

You cannot change reality, but you can control the manner in which you look at things. Your attitude is under your own control. Weed out the negative and focus on the positive!

Helen Steiner Rice

~~~

Rules for Driving in New York City

* When on a one way street, stay to the right to allow oncoming traffic to pass.

* Never, ever, stop for a pedestrian unless he flings himself under the wheels of your car.

* The first parking space you see will be the last parking space you see. Grab it.

* Never get in the way of a car that needs extensive body work.

* Always look both ways when running a red light.

* Never use directional signals when changing lanes. They only warn other drivers to speed up and not let you in. (Truest of All)

* Making eye contact revokes your right of way.

* Whenever possible, stop in the middle of a crosswalk to ensure inconveniencing as many pedestrians as possible. And if a pedestrian ahead of you steps into the road, speed up, honk or yell loudly and chase him back up on the curb. Pedestrians have no rights.

~~~

The opinion of 10,000 men is of no value if none of them know anything about the subject.

Marcus Aurelius

~~~

After telling the customs agent he had nothing in his bags but clothing, Mark was alarmed when the official decided to open them up and check. In the very first one she opened, cushioned between his socks was a bottle of cognac.

“Nothing to declare but clothing, huh?”

“Right,” Mark extemporized. “That, madam, is my nightcap.”

~~~

“Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions.

Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.”

Mark Twain

~~~

A flight attendant on a cross-country flight nervously announced: about 30 minutes outbound from LA, “I don’t know how this happened, but we have 103 passengers aboard and only 40 dinners.”

When the passengers’ muttering had died down, she continued, “Anyone who is kind enough to give up his meal so someone else can eat will receive free drinks for the length of the flight.”

Her next announcement came an hour later. “If anyone wants to change his mind, we still have 29 dinners available!”

~~~

Think of all the beauty still left around you and be happy.

Anne Frank

~~~

The veterinarian told the blonde that her dog needed some exercise. You need to make sure the dog runs around, the doctor said. Try playing a game of fetch the ball.

“I can’t play fetch with my dog,” the blonde said.

“Why not?” the doctor asked.

“Because,” she replied, “He can’t throw, duh.”

~~~

A well-developed sense of humor is the pole that adds balance to your steps as you walk the tightrope of life.

William A. Ward

~~~

He said: As a court clerk, I am well-versed in the jury-selection process. First a computer randomly selects a few hundred citizens from the entire county to report for jury duty on a particular day. Then another computer assigns 40 of those present to a courtroom. Then the 40 names are placed into a drum, and a dozen names are pulled.

During jury selection for one trial, the judge asked potential Juror No. 1 if there was any reason he could not be a fair and impartial juror.

“There may be,” he replied. “Juror No. 12 is my ex-wife, and if we were on the same jury, I guarantee we would not be able to agree on anything.”

Both were excused.

~~~

No matter how happily a woman may be married, it always pleases her to discover that there is a nice man who wishes that she were not.

~~~

The boss was very exasperated with his new secretary. She ignored the telephone when it rang.

“You must answer the telephone,” he told her irritably.

“All right,” she replied, “but it seems so silly. It’s always for you.”

~~~

Keep your thoughts positive, because your thoughts become your words. Keep your words positive, because your words become your behavior. Keep your behavior positive, because your behavior become your habits. Keep your habits positive, because your habits.

Mahatma Gandhi

~~~

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at http://rays-daily,com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

 

 

Help If You Can

Ray’s Daily

March 24, 2020

HTTP://rays-daily.com

“Unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot, nothing is going to get better. It’s not.”

– Dr. Seuss

Helping

Nancy and I are learning how to live as hermits, we continue to stay in our apartment, pretty much with no contact with others. Yesterday for the first time in our more than 66 years of marriage we slept the morning away in our recliners. We are watching a lot of television and are enjoying many movies produced years ago.

I do appreciate the e-mail and phone contacts from friends and family. I am also glad that we have a place that provides us food and a comfortable existence. I just wish that everyone had it as good as we do.

Far too many of our fellow citizens are on the brink of disaster and I hope that all who can help them will do so. I am grateful to those who are unselfishly reaching out to those in need.

I know it is not easy but please take care of yourself, this to will pass and you will be needed in the future.

Here is an excerpt from a message that I got from my friends at Oasis that I hope you will heed.

We advise taking social-distancing precautions that include:

1)    Avoid close conversations and maintain distance between yourself and others in both one-on-one and small group encounters.

2)    Ritualize frequent hand sanitizing and hand washing and be mindful of objects you touch often – your phone, keys, wallet – that could transfer disease even after you have self-sanitized. When possible, re-sanitize hands after touching frequently held objects AND sanitize those objects with disinfecting wipes.

3)    Avoid large gatherings when possible, and practice 1 and 2 above during and after all interactions.

4)    Health professionals recommend avoiding plane, train, and other shared travel unless absolutely necessary, and have escalated that recommendation to include all non-essential activities.

5)    At the first signs of infection, contact a health professional you trust and get evaluated. There is evidence that COVID-19 has an infection “tipping point” and early intervention leads to better outcomes.

6)    Finally: Don’t panic. If you are practicing social distancing and are engaging in good self-care, then you are unlikely to get sick. Eat well.  Get sleep. Go for a long walk when the weather is nice. Continue to think about good hygiene at all times, wash your hands frequently and clean frequent touch points.

~~~

“We rise by lifting others.”

Robert Ingersoll

~~~

I called to make airline reservations and was put on hold. After several minutes of taped music, a recorded voice came on: “If you have been waiting longer than ten minutes, press eight. This will not speed up your call, but it will give you something to do while you wait.”

~~~

Among the most effective labor-saving devices is the neighbor who hasn’t returned your garden tools.

~~~

There was a tailor named Mendel and he was worried about his business. Mendel was down to his last $50 and was torn between buying a sign and getting food for his family. Mendel decided to pray.

“Dear God,” he said, “I don’t know what to do. If I buy a sign it may bring in business, but I need to buy groceries for my family…and if the sign doesn’t bring in sales, we will starve.”

God replied, “Mendel, buy the sign. Don’t worry, your family won’t starve.”

So, Mendel bought the sign and business took off. The tailor fed his family and all was well. However, as time passed it became evident that Mendel couldn’t keep up with orders all by himself. He contemplated hiring on a helper, but wondered if he could afford it. So, he asked God if getting help would be a prudent move.

“Go ahead,” God tells Mendel, “hire some help, you’ll do okay.”

And so Mendel did. And business took off beyond his wildest dreams. After a time, the tailor decided to move to a larger site that would accommodate the growing demands of his business. As he surveyed certain locations, he found a perfect storefront, but the rental price was really steep.

“God,” Mendel again prayed, “I found the perfect place to relocate my business. But the cost of the lease worries me. I don’t want to get in over my head.”

“Go ahead and a get a lease on the store, Mendel,” said God. “Trust me, you’ll be okay–I haven’t steered you wrong yet, have I?”

So Mendel signed a lease on the 5th Avenue store and profits from his business went through the roof. Out of heartfelt gratitude, Mendel proposed to the Almighty that he dedicate the store to Him.

“How do you like the name “Yaweh and Mendel,” the tailor asked.

“Nah,” God said. “Let’s go with ‘Lord and Taylor.'”

~~~

Character isn’t inherited. One builds it daily by the way one thinks and acts.

Helen Gahagan Douglas

~~~

An old wild west fort is about to be attacked. The wily old General sends for his trusty Indian Scout. “Yumti-Bi,” he said, “you must use all your thirty years of skill in trying to estimate the sort of army we are up against here.” Yumti-Bi laid down and put his ear to the ground… “Heap large war party,” he says, “maybe three hundred braves, four chiefs, two on black stallions, two on white stallions. All have war paint…many many guns. Medicine man also with them.” “Good grief!” exclaims the General, “you can tell all of that just by listening to the ground???” “No, General,” replied the Indian, “I can see under the gate…”

~~~

“The purpose of life is to contribute in some way to making things better.”

Robert F. Kennedy

~~~

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at http://rays-daily,com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

 

 

We need to do our best

Ray’s Daily

March 23. 2020

http://rays-daily.com

How old would you be if you didn’t know how old you were?

Satchel Paige

aging

These are trying times for us all. I was asked by a friend the other day if I was staying as upbeat as I usually am. My answer was that I was trying but it was not easy. My wife and me are pretty much required to stay in our apartment. There is not much we can do to change reality, we have to do the best we can. So we will go on, making the best of the difficult time. Rather than preparing a new Daily I am again sending you one from a better time.

Ray’s Daily first published on 2007

I was thinking the other day about the pros and cons of aging. In some respects life seems a little more complicated with all the health issues, taxes, and other bureaucratic stuff. It probably really isn’t any more complicated than it ever was, it just seems that way. On the other hand you get to the point where you are free to unleash all the unused youth that you kept pent up as the years went by. It is not a second childhood, it is more like, “watch out world I get to be me now and I don’t really care that much what people think.” You don’t have to like something because the critics tell you it is great or feel guilty because you like a piece of art without understanding in detail why you do. It really is sad how many years so many of us waste waiting before we set ourselves free.

Here are some thoughts I excerpted from a piece that Pat, one of our readers, sent me recently. It tells the story we all should hear as early in life as we can.

Old age, I decided, is a gift. I am now, probably for the first time in my life, the person I have always wanted to be.  Oh, not my body!  Often I am taken aback by that old person that lives in my mirror (who looks like my mother!), but I don’t agonize over those things for long.

I would never trade my amazing friends, my wonderful life, my loving family for less gray hair or a flatter belly.  As I’ve aged, I’ve become more kind to myself, and less critical of myself. I’ve become my own friend. I don’t chide myself for eating that extra cookie, or for not making my bed, or for buying that silly cement gecko that I didn’t need, but looks so avante garde on my patio.  I am entitled to a treat, to be messy, to be extravagant.

I have seen too many dear friends leave this world too soon; before they understood the great freedom that comes with aging. Whose business is it if I choose to read or play on the computer until 4 AM and sleep until noon? I will dance with myself to those wonderful tunes of the 40 &50’s, and if I, at the same time, wish to weep over a lost love, I will.

I know I am sometimes forgetful.  But there again, some of life is just as well forgotten.  And I eventually remember the important things. Sure, over the years my heart has been broken.   How can your heart not break when you lose a loved one, or when a child suffers, or even when somebody’s beloved pet gets hit by a car?  But broken hearts are what give us strength and understanding and compassion.  A heart never broken is pristine and sterile and will never know the joy of being imperfect.

As you get older, it is easier to be positive. You care less about what other people think.  I don’t question myself anymore.  I’ve even earned the right to be wrong. So, to answer your question, I like being old. It has set me free.  I like the person I have become.  I am not going to live forever, but while I am still here, I will not waste time lamenting what could have been, or worrying about what will be.  And I shall eat dessert every single day.  (If I feel like it).

So my young friends I offer you the life style of the well lived generation. Won’t you come join me in the sand box, we have castles to build. I just wish I had reached these golden years when I was in my twenties.

A man is not old until regrets take the place of dreams.

John Barrymore

~~~

A girl from North Carolina and a girl from California sat side by side on an airplane.

The girl from North Carolina, being friendly and all, said, “So, where ya from?”

The California girl said, “From a place where they know better than to use a preposition at the end of a sentence.”

The girl from North Carolina sat quietly for a few moments and then replied: “So, where ya from, bitch?

~~~

My religion is very simple. My religion is kindness.

The Dalai Lama

~~~

A big city corporate lawyer runs a stop sign in a small town in Tennessee, and gets pulled over by a sheriff’s deputy. He thinks that he is smarter than this hicktown deputy because he is a lawyer and is certain that he has a better education. He decides to prove this to himself and have some fun at the deputy’s expense. Deputy says, “License and registration, please.”

Lawyer says, “What for?”

Deputy says, “Y’all didn’t come to a complete stop at the stop sign.”

Lawyer says, “I slowed down, and no one was coming.”

Deputy says, “You still didn’t come to a complete stop. License and registration, please.”

Lawyer says, “What’s the difference?”

Deputy says, “The difference is, y’all have to come to complete stop, that’s the law. License and registration, please!”

Lawyer says, “If you can show me the legal difference between slow down and stop, I’ll give you my license and registration; and you give me the ticket. If not, you let me go and don’t give me the ticket.”

Deputy says, “sounds fair. Exit your vehicle, sir.”

At this point, the deputy takes out his nightstick and starts beating the ever-loving crap out of the lawyer and says, “Do y’all want me to stop or just slow down?”

~~~

“A great many people think they are thinking when they are really rearranging their prejudices.”

William James

~~~

She looked like such a sweet little old lady, driving the cute Toyota with a bumper sticker that said, “Grow your own dope.”

How sweet, I thought, must be a medical marijuana patient.

Then I noticed the rest of her message … “Plant a man.”

~~~

“Conscience is what makes a boy tell his mother before his sister does.”

Evan Esar

~~~

On one occasion a student burst into his office. “Professor Stigler, I don’t believe I deserve this F you’ve given me.

To which Stigler replied, “I agree, but unfortunately it is the lowest grade the University will allow me to award.

~~~

I called to make airline reservations and was put on hold. After several minutes of taped music, a recorded voice came on: “If you have been waiting longer than ten minutes, you may press eight. This will not speed up your call, but it will give you something to do while you wait.

~~~

“Where facts are few, experts are many.”

Donald R. Gannon

~~~

A man pacing back and forth glanced at his watch and yelled upstairs to his wife, “Honey, are you ready yet?”

Shouting back, the woman replies, “For crying out loud, I’ve been telling you for the last half hour that I’ll be ready in a minute!

~~~

How far you go in life depends on your being tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving and tolerant of the weak and the strong. Because someday in life you will have been all of these.

George Washington Carver

~~~

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at http://rays-daily,com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

 

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