Ray's musings and humor

Archive for April, 2022

Have a great weekend

Ray’s Daily

April 29, 2022

http://rays-daily.com

“I hope that your weekend is worth the wait. Enjoy!”

I plan on having a restful and stress free weekend. I have learned that how my days go it pretty much up to me. Here is a piece I got from the Chernoff’s that reminded me of what steps I can take to keep my days positive.

5 Notes to Self You Should Memorize Before the Weekend

1. Don’t get stuck on the one little thing that wrecks your mood. Breathe. Life is too short for senseless negativity. No matter how good or bad you have it, do your best to wake up each day thankful for your life. Remember, someone somewhere else is desperately fighting for theirs.

2. You didn’t go to sleep hungry last night. You had a choice of what to wear today. You have access to clean drinking water. You have access to the internet. You can read. The secret to being grateful is no secret. You choose to be grateful for the little things, again and again.

3. The majority of what’s stressing you out today probably won’t matter a week from now. Shake it off, reset and bring your attention back to what’s important. Remember, what you focus on grows. Stop micromanaging your time and start better managing your focus, so you can truly move forward.

4. Distancing yourself from someone who keeps giving you headaches and negative vibes is self-care. Stepping back from situations where you consistently feel unappreciated or disrespected is self-care. Choose to honor your feelings and boundaries, respectfully.

5. Too often we take for granted and “wait” away the vast majority of our lives. Truly, some people wait all day for 5pm, all week for Friday, all year for the holidays, all their lives for happiness. Don’t be one of them.

And let’s be honest, we all have negative thought patterns we emotionally default to when times get tough. Patterns like procrastination, people-pleasing, reacting with a victim mentality, wanting to spend more time in toxic situations, or indulging in negative self-talk.

But it’s time to break up with the faulty patterns of thinking and behaving that are holding you back! Remind yourself that the most powerful weapon against stress is a healthy mind’s ability to choose one thought over another. You need to train your mind to see the best of what you have right in front of you, so you can leverage it to make real progress again.

The bottom line is that, despite the real world challenges we all face, the biggest and most complex obstacle you will ever have to personally overcome is your own mind. Let that sink in. You aren’t responsible for everything that happens to you in life, but you ARE responsible for undoing the self-defeating thinking patterns these undesirable experiences create.

YOU CAN THINK BETTER, which means you can live better.

~~~

“Happiness comes when you believe in what you are doing, know what you are doing, and love what you are doing.” Have a happy weekend!

~~~

A teenager is: 

* A person who can’t remember to walk the dog but never forgets a phone number. 

* A weight watcher who goes on a diet by giving up candy bars before breakfast. 

* A youngster who receives her allowance on Monday, spends it on Tuesday, and borrows it from her best friend on Wednesday. 

* Someone who can hear his favorite singer 3 blocks away but not his mother calling from the next room. 

* A whiz who can operate the latest computer without a lesson but can’t make a bed. 

* A student who spends 12 minutes studying history and 12 hours studying for her driver’s license. 

* A connoisseur of 2 kinds of fine music–loud and very loud. 

* An enthusiast who has the energy to bike for miles but is usually too tired to dry the dishes. 

* A young woman who loves the cat and tolerates the brother. 

* A romantic who never falls in love more than once a week. 

* A budding beauty who never smiles until her braces come off. 

* A boy who can sleep till noon on any Saturday he suspects the lawn needs mowing. 

* An original thinker who is positive that her mother was never a teenager. 

~~~

Love is the ability and willingness to allow those that you care for to be what they choose for themselves without any insistence that they satisfy you.

Wayne Dyer

~~~

There was this West Va. sheriff and his deputy riding along the small town.  They spot a car with out of town plates and decided to pull it over. The sheriff says “Where you from boy?”

The man says Chicago. Sheriff says, “Don’t lie to me son I saw them Illinois tags.”

~~~

The greatest use of life is to spend it for something that will outlast it.

William James

~~~

Ten Things a Cat Thinks About

I could have sworn I heard the can opener.

Is there something I’m not getting when humans make noise with their mouths?

Why doesn’t the government do something about dogs?

I wonder if Morris really liked 9-Lives, or did he have ulterior motives?

Hmmm … If dogs serve humans, and humans serve cats, why can’t we cats ever get these stupid dogs to do anything for us?

This looks like a good spot for a nap.

Hey! No kidding, I’m sure that’s the can opener.

Would humans have built a vast and complex civilization of their own if we cats hadn’t given them a reason to invent sofas and can openers in the first place?

If there’s a God, how can He allow neutering?

If that really was the can opener, I’ll play finicky just to let them know who’s boss!

~~~

It’s lonely at the top, but you eat better.

~~~

I was listening to a lady who called a radio minister. The minister was a wise, grandfatherly gentlemen who had that calm reassuring voice that can melt all fear. The lady, who was obviously crying, says,

“I was born blind, and I’ve been blind all my life. I don’t mind so much being blind but I have some well-meaning friends who tell me if I had more faith I could be healed and see again.”

The minister asked her, “Tell me, do you carry one of those white canes?”

“Why, yes, I do,” she replied.

“Well, then… the next time someone says that to you, hit them over the head with your cane,” he said. “Then tell them… ‘If you had more faith, that wouldn’t hurt!’ “

~~~

“If you find you are stressed out during the week, then it is even more important that you focus on what you want to do for the weekend, don’t bring work home.”

Kate Summers

~~~

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than twenty years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@comcast.net. Back issues are posted at http://rays-daily,com/ currently there are hundreds of  readers from around the world.

Dare to be different

Ray’s Daily

April 28, 2022

http://rays-daily.com

It gives me great pleasure indeed to see the stubbornness of an incorrigible nonconformist warmly acclaimed.

Albert Einstein

Ray’s Daily first published on April 28, 2010 9:42 AM

There is a major oil spill in the gulf, the temperature has plunged to near freezing, and I am off to meet with a former colleague and lasting friend prior to attending a lecture on US – China relations. Rather than making an attempt at sharing wisdom I decided to go back six years and see what I had to say then. Here is what I wrote on April 28, 2004.

~~~

One of my pals sent this piece of wisdom:

If you spend all your energy avoiding the possibility of failure, failure is precisely what you’ll get. To avail yourself of life’s rewards, you must be willing to live with some of life’s risks. It is indeed foolish to take unnecessary risks. It is even more foolish to avoid risk completely.

When you take action, there’s always a chance that something will go wrong. Yet if you never go ahead with the action, you’ll never get anything accomplished. When you make a decision, there’s always a chance that you could be wrong. Yet if you never made a decision, you’d never get anything right.

There is risk in life, and life is certainly worth the risk. Know the risks, prepare for them, manage them, and get accustomed to living with them. Be willing to live with the possibility of failure. And you’re on your way to achieving amazing success.

Each of us is conditioned from the time we are little to conform. Parents set rules, society imposes convention, managers set limits, and friends criticize. My fear has always been that the more restrictions and limits we place on others the more we assure their conformance and stifle their performance. I think that spills into our private lives as well, many of us are so conditioned that we don’t even consider breaking out of our molds. Look around and I think you will see that those who have the most fun, those that get the most done, and those who have the greatest amount of self satisfaction are the non-conformists. So do something crazy once in awhile, forget the critics and enjoy the people who will join you as you proceed to enjoy life.

~~~

I was part of that strange race of people aptly described as spending their lives doing things they detest to make money they don’t want to buy things they don’t need to impress people they dislike.

Emile Henry Gauvreau

~~~

Carolyn sent this to us, I doubt she is a blonde.

Why won’t they hire blondes as pharmacists? (They keep breaking the prescription bottles in the typewriters.)

Hear about the blonde that got an AM radio? (It took her a month to realize she could play it in the afternoon.)

Why did the blonde scale the chain-link fence? (To see what was on the other side.)

Why do blondes have more fun? (They’re easier to amuse.)

Did you hear about the blonde that shot an arrow into the air? (She missed.)

Why did the blonde resolve to have only three children? (Because she read that one child out of every four born was Chinese.)

Why did the blonde ask her friends to save their burned-out light bulbs? (She needed them for the darkroom she was building.)

~~~

Maxine on “Lawn Care”

“The key to a nice-looking lawn is a good mower. I recommend one who is muscular and shirtless.”

~~~

A minister decided to do something a little different one Sunday morning.

He said, “Today, in church, I am going to say a single word and you are going to help me preach. Whatever single word I say, I want you to sing whatever hymn that comes to your mind.

The pastor shouted out “CROSS.” Immediately the congregation started singing in unison, “THE OLD RUGGED CROSS.”

The pastor hollered out “GRACE.” The congregation began to sing “AMAZING GRACE, how sweet the sound.”

The pastor said “POWER.” The congregation sang “THERE IS POWER IN THE BLOOD”.

The Pastor said “SEX!” The congregation fell in total silence.

Everyone was in shock. They all nervously began to look around at each other afraid to say anything. Then all of a sudden, way from in the back of the church, a little old 87-year-old grandmother stood up and began to sing “PRECIOUS MEMORIES.”

~~~

We can’t change how we started out but starting now we can change the ending.

~~~

With all the new technology regarding fertility, a 65 year-old woman was able to give birth to a baby recently. When she was discharged from the hospital and went home, her relatives came to visit. “May we see the new baby?” one asked.

“Not yet,” said the mother. “I’ll make coffee and we can visit for a while first.”

Thirty minutes had passed, and another relative asked, “May we see the new baby now?”

“No, not yet,” said the mother.

After another few minutes had elapsed, they asked again, “May we see the baby now?”

“No, not yet,” replied the mother.

Growing very impatient, they asked, “Well, when CAN we see the baby?”

“WHEN IT CRIES!” she told them.

“WHEN IT CRIES??” they demanded. “Why do we have to wait until it CRIES??”

“BECAUSE, I forgot where I put it…”

~~~

A rabbi took a job at a Duracell factory. His job is to stand on the production line and as the batteries go by, say, “I wish you long life”

~~~

An evangelist had a great revival camp going.  One night he was up in front of a large audience, speaking on imperfection.  He asked his audience towards the end, “Has anyone ever known anyone who has come CLOSE to the perfection of our lord, Jesus Christ?”

Nobody, of course raised their hand.  So he issued the question again.  “Anybody! Has ANYONE ever known that kind of perfection?”

Finally a guy in the back raised his hand, so of course he was asked to stand up. “Tell us.  Tell us who you knew who was so close to perfection.”

The man responded, “My wife’s first husband.”

~~~

“We can’t all be heroes because someone has to sit on the curb and clap as they go by.”

Will Rogers

~~~

Mr. & Mrs. Jones were eating breakfast one morning and Mrs. was reading a letter while she ate.

Suddenly she looked up suspiciously at her husband.

“Henry,” she said, “I’ve just received a letter from mother saying she isn’t accepting our invitation to come and stay, as we do not appear to want her. What does she mean by that?  I told you to write and say that she was to come at her own convenience.  You did write to her, didn’t you?”

“Er, yes, honey, I did,” said the husband.  “But I couldn’t spell ‘convenience’, so I substituted ‘risk’.” (last time we checked, this husband was still recovering from his injuries.)

~~~

I had amnesia once — or twice.

~~~

A colleague was planning a trip to my business office and asked if I could find him a hotel with exercise facilities. I called several hotels, with no luck.

Finally, I thought I had found one. I asked the receptionist if the hotel had a weight room.

“No,” she replied, “but we have a lobby. You can wait there.”

~~~

The idea that men are created free and equal is both true and misleading: men are created different; they lose their social freedom and their individual autonomy in seeking to become like each other.

David Riesman

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than twenty years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@comcast.net. Back issues are posted at http://rays-daily,com/ currently there are hundreds of  readers from around the world.

Memories

Ray’s Daily

April 27, 2022

http://rays-daily.com

The moments we share are the moments we keep forever.

Author Unknown

These days I enjoy the memories of days gone by. While it is the 21st centaury most of my happiest days took place some time ago. Here are reminders of what life was like in the 50’s.

The 50’s were a charming decade-a time where everything seemed so simple. Food (especially candy), music, and movies used to be so cheap, which meant there was always something fun to do.

But If you were still bored, you could just walk on over to your neighbor’s house and see what they were up to. If you grew up in the 50’s, you will remember how true these were.

20. Horse-drawn milk carts…The milkman had a horse and cart. Yes Ernie really lived… and you WOULD hear the clip clop of his horse and the clink of the bottles on the doorstep as he made his way down your street well before dawn.

19. The Corona Lorry – It came around once a week and your biggest decision was whether to choose root beer or cream soda! And you always kept the bottles to return, as you’d get a penny back on each one!

18. The communal telephone – You had just the one, and it may have been a party line, shared with a neighbor You’d have different numbers, but if you picked up and they were talking, you’d just have to wait to make your call!

17. The Rag And Bone Man – He’d also came round on a horse and cart, ringing a bell so you’d know he was around, and shouting out ‘Any old iron, any old iron?’

16. The Rented TV – Yep, back in the 1950s, the telly was paid for each week up at the Radio Rentals shop, and if you were lucky your mum and dad would change it every year or so for the latest model.

15. The arrival of color television! – Nothing quite compared with the excitement of seeing your favourite programmes in blazing colour for the first time. Joy!

14. Making a go cart – Hot rods and jalopies

13. The cold! – There was no central heating. Individual rooms were heated with a coal fire or a gas heater – turned on only when the rooms were being used. Your bedroom wasn’t heated!

12. Play time – We’d go out and play for hours – sometimes all day. Our mom wouldn’t have a clue where we were or what we were up to – and she didn’t worry!

11. Old Money – Decimal coins came in 1971, so we grew up with the old money.

10. Stamps and Coupons – Your mom collected Green Shield Stamps and Co-Op ‘divi’ stamps, your dad collected the Embassy tokens from the cigarette packets and you spent many a happy hour flicking through the catalogs deciding what to ‘spend’ them on!

9. Cigarette sticks and coconut tobacco – We’d pretend to smoke our candy sticks – complete with a pink tip – and scoff brown coconut ‘tobacco’ from a pouch. There were also Jamboree bags, gobstoppers and milk bottles (and thankfully you can still buy them today!)

8. Your dad’s car – To start it, he’d pull out the choke to let the gas into the engine. Too much and it’d flood, and much cursing would ensue while you waited for it to dry out so he could try again. When he indicated, a little orange arrow-shaped indicator popped out from the side of the car. Seatbelts? What were they…?

7. The first tights – Oh the joy of giving up your suspender belt and nylon stockings for a pair of tights. It was life changing and, yes, we wore bum-scraping mini skirts and tiny hot pants the first time around!

6. Eating out – You’d meet your mates in the local Wimpy Bar for a cheeseburger, cola float and a sticky Rum Baba. A trip out with mom and dad was steak and fries, followed by Black Forest Gateau at the local Berni Inn.

5. New supermarkets – When you were little, your mom went to lots of different shops – meat from the butcher, bread from the bakery, veg and fruit from the greengrocers, but then the first ‘self-service’ shop opened in your high street. Supermarkets had arrived.

4. Your first job – It paid less than $20 a week, you got your wages in a brown envelope on a Friday and, if you were lucky, you also had a Luncheon Voucher every day – it was enough to buy a sandwich AND a bag of chips!

3. ‘Proper’ music – Remember your little hand-held transistor radio? You took it to bed at night to tune in under the covers when your mum thought you were asleep! You listened to your 45s and LPs on your mum and dad’s huge wooden gramophone, or up in your bedroom on a portable ‘Dansette’ record player.

2. You went to five and dimes – Forget the Dollar Store—you shopped at Woolworth’s. You bought candy, nuts, toy soldiers, makeup, hair clips, balloons, handkerchiefs—whatever childhood treasure you could afford with your precious nickels. And after shopping, you sidled up to the lunch counter for the most delicious sandwich and fountain soda you’ve ever had. Try getting THAT at Walmart.

What’s Number 1 on our countdown? Well, we are leaving that up to you! What did we miss? What can you add?

~~~

No one can ever take your memories from you – each day is a new beginning, make good memories every day.

Catherine Pulsifer

~~~

Some headlines from the past you may have missed:

Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over

Lung Cancer in Women Mushrooms

Teacher Strikes Idle Kids

Squad Helps Dog Bite Victim

Shot Off Woman’s Leg Helps Nicklaus to 66

~~~

“I’ve learned that I should make the little decisions with my head and the big decisions with my heart.”

~~~

A pious man who had reached the age of 105 suddenly stopped going to synagogue. Alarmed by the old fellow’s absence after so many years of faithful attendance the Rabbi went to see him.

He found him in excellent health, so the Rabbi asked, “How come after all these years we don’t see you at services anymore?”

The old man looked around and lowered his voice. “I’ll tell you, Rabbi,” he whispered. “When I got to be 90, I expected God to take me any day. But then I got to be 95, then 100, then 105. So I figured that God is very busy and must’ve forgotten about me, and I don’t want to remind Him!”

~~~

She said: It begins when you sink into his arms and ends with your arms in the sink.

~~~

I suppose some degree of commerce would grind to a halt if telephone solicitors weren’t able to call people at home during the dinner hour.  But that doesn’t make it any more pleasant.

Now Steve Rubenstein, a writer for the San Francisco Chronicle, has proposed “Three Little Words” based on his brief experience in a telemarketing operation — that would stop the nuisance for all time.  The three little words are “Hold on, please.”

Saying this while putting down your phone and walking off instead of hanging up immediately — would make each telemarketing call so time-consuming that boiler rooms would grind to a halt.

When you eventually hear the phone company’s beep-beep-beep tone, you know it’s time to go back and hang up your handset, which has efficiently completed its task.

~~~

She said, men have feelings too (but who really cares)

~~~

A troop of Boy Scouts was being used as “guinea pigs” in a test of emergency systems. A mock earthquake was staged, and the Scouts impersonated wounded persons who were to be picked up and cared for by the emergency units.

One Scout was supposed to lie on the ground and await his rescuers, but the first-aid people got behind schedule, and the Scout lay “wounded” for several hours.

When the first-aid squad arrived where the casualty was supposed to be, they found nothing but a brief note: “Have bled to death and gone home.”

~~~

“A girl phoned me the other day and said, ‘Come on over; nobody’s home.’  I went over. Nobody was home.”

Rodney Dangerfield

~~~

A little boy, who was “very” much afraid of the dark, was told by his mother to go out to the back porch and bring her the broom. The little boy turned to his mother and said, “Mama, I don’t want to go out there. It’s dark.”

The mother smiled reassuringly at her son. You don’t have to be afraid of the dark,” she explained. “Jesus is out there he’ll look after you and protect you.”

The little boy looked at his mother real hard and asked, “Are you sure he’s out there?”

“Yes, I’m sure. He is everywhere, and he is always ready to help you when you need him,” she said.

The little boy thought about that for a minute and then went to the back door and cracked it a little. Peering out into the darkness, he called “Jesus? If you’re out there, would you please hand me the broom?

~~~

“There are many things in life that will catch your eye, but only a few will catch your heart. Pursue those.”

~~~

We must use time wisely for our development and advancement; so that when we are old, we can look back and recollect the pleasant memories and deeds that we have achieved.

Michael Lee

~~~

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than twenty years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@comcast.net. Back issues are posted at http://rays-daily,com/ currently there are hundreds of  readers from around the world.

Say what you mean

Ray’s Daily

April 26, 2022

http://rays-daily.com

We have too many high sounding words and too few actions that correspond with them.

Abigail Adams

Ray’s Daily first published on April 26, 2005

~~~

Abigail said this centuries ago, however it has only been lately that I have noticed how prevalent the problem has become. To me it is almost as if we have adopted George Orwell’s Newspeak as our primary language. I remember when commitment meant an obligation, today I find it just as often means something like “I definitely will do it” leaving out the part about “If I have nothing better to do.” Too many times we have to get more volunteers than we need since we know many will not honor their commitment. It is the same thing with the word prompt, it use to mean something like punctual, today it just as often means sometime that same day.

The sad part is that it seems too many of us have accepted the fact that words have lost their precision. Many of us just accept the fact that people may or may not mean what they say. It is almost as if the politicians and others who look us straight in the eye and say “everything is fine” often enough have conditioned us to believe what is said not caring excessively about accuracy.

I wish I was wrong. I wish people would do as they say, honor their commitments, and return to integrity. What ever happened to “My word is my bond,” “You can take what I say to the bank,” and “You can count on me”? Honesty, commitment, and reliability all take work, work that is an investment in ourselves, others, and the world around us. So let’s start a Say What You Mean and Mean What You Say movement and let us stamp out Newspeak wherever we find it.

Of course I don’t mean you, and I don’t mean me, I mean that other guy behind the tree.

~~~

Our major obligation is not to mistake slogans for solutions.

Edward R. Murrow

~~~

A kind-hearted motorist saw a man struggling to change a tire alongside the highway, and pulled over to see whether he could help.

The man had a very red face, and a dark smear across it where he’d wiped off sweat with dirty hands. His tie was undone and his shirt collar askew, and it was clear he had also wiped his hands on his once-white shirt.

Close to him stood an immaculately neat woman who was speaking in quick, agitated tones.

“Hello, there,” said the motorist. “Say, I’ve changed a lot of tires ….. maybe I can help here.”

“You sure can,” the man with the flat tire replied wearily. “My wife is an expert, too. If you will just do all the arguing with her about how this tire ought to be changed, I will concentrate on the dirty work and get the job done.”

~~~

“I think the one lesson I have learned is that there is no substitute for paying attention.”

Diane Sawyer

~~~

GOD’S THOUGHTS ON LAWNS

GOD:  Frank, you know all about gardens and nature. What in the world is going on down there on that planet Earth?  What happened to the dandelions, violets, thistle and stuff I started eons ago?  I had a perfect, no-maintenance garden plan. Those plants grow in any type of soil, withstand drought and multiply with abandon.  The nectar from the long lasting blossoms attracts butterflies, honey bees and flocks of songbirds.  I expected to see a vast garden of colors by now.  But all I see are these green rectangles.

ST. FRANCIS: It’s the tribes that settled there, LORD. The Suburbanites.  They started calling your flowers “weeds” and went to great lengths to kill them and replace them with grass.

GOD: Grass?  But it’s so boring. It’s not colorful. It doesn’t attract butterflies, birds and bees, only grubs and sod worms.  It’s sensitive to temperatures.  Do these Suburbanites really want all that grass growing there?

ST. FRANCIS: Apparently so, LORD. They go to great pains to grow it and keep it green.  They begin each spring by fertilizing grass and poisoning any other plant that crops up in the lawn.

GOD: The spring rains and warm weather probably make grass grow really fast. That must make the Suburbanites happy.

ST. FRANCIS: Apparently not, LORD. As soon as it grows a little, they cut it — sometimes twice a week.

GOD: They cut it?  Do they then bail it like hay?

ST. FRANCIS: Not exactly, LORD.  Most of them rake it up and put it in bags.

GOD: They bag it?  Why?  Is it a cash crop?  Do they sell it?

ST. FRANCIS: No, Sir.  Just the opposite. They pay to throw it away.

GOD: Now let me get this straight. They fertilize grass so it will grow.  And when it does grow, they cut it off and pay to throw it away?

ST. FRANCIS: Yes, Sir.

GOD: These Suburbanites must be relieved in the summer when we cut back on the rain and turn up the heat. That surely slows the growth and saves them a lot of work.

ST. FRANCIS: You aren’t going to believe this LORD. When the grass stops growing so fast, they drag out hoses and pay more money to water it so they can continue to mow it and pay to get rid of it.

GOD: What nonsense.  At least they kept some of the trees.  That was a sheer stroke of genius, if I do say so myself.  The trees grow leaves in the spring to provide beauty and shade in the summer.  In the autumn they fall to the ground and form a natural blanket to keep moisture in the soil and protect the trees and bushes.  Plus, as they rot, the leaves form compost to enhance the soil.  It’s a natural circle of life.

ST. FRANCIS: You better sit down, LORD. The Suburbanites have drawn a new circle.  As soon as the leaves fall, they rake them into great piles and pay to have them hauled away.

GOD: No.  What do they do to protect the shrub and tree roots in the winter and to keep the soil moist and loose?

ST. FRANCIS: After throwing away the leaves, they go out and buy something which they call mulch. They haul it home and spread it around in place of the leaves.

GOD: And where do they get this mulch?

ST. FRANCIS: They cut down trees and grind them up to make the mulch.

GOD: Enough.  I don’t want to think about this anymore. St. Catherine, you’re in charge of the arts.  What movie have you scheduled for us tonight?

ST. CATHERINE: ‘Dumb and Dumber,’ Lord.  It’s a real stupid movie about….

GOD: Never mind, I think I just heard the whole story from St Francis.

~~~

It is terrible to grow old alone – my wife has not had a birthday in ten years.

~~~

Perhaps you’ve heard of the man who thought he was dead, when in reality he was very much alive. His delusion became such a problem that his family finally paid for him to see a psychiatrist.

The psychiatrist spent many laborious sessions trying to convince the man he was still alive. Nothing seemed to work. Finally the doctor tried one last approach. He took out his medical books and proceeded to show the patient that dead men don’t bleed. After hours of tedious study, the patient seemed convinced that dead men don’t bleed.

“Do you now agree that dead men don’t bleed?” the doctor asked.

“Yes, I do,” the patient replied.

“Very well, then,” the doctor said.

He took out a pin and pricked the patient’s finger. Out came a trickle of blood.

The doctor asked, “What does that tell you?”

“Oh my goodness!” the patient exclaimed as he stared incredulously at his finger……. “Dead men do bleed!!”

~~~

She said, there are easier things in life than finding a good man…like nailing Jello to a tree, for instance.

~~~

She also said: I was on vacation in Las Vegas, playing the slot machines.

It was my first time in a casino, and I wasn’t sure how any of the machines operated.

“Excuse me.” I said to a casino employee.  “How does this work?”

The worker showed me how to insert a bill, hit the spin button, and operate the release handle.

“And where does the money come out?” I asked.

He smiled and motioned to a far wall before saying, “Usually at the ATM.”

~~~

The ingredients of happiness are so simple that they can be counted on one hand.

Happiness comes from within, and rests most securely on simple goodness and clear conscience.

William Ogden

~~~

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than twenty years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@comcast.net. Back issues are posted at http://rays-daily,com/ currently there are hundreds of  readers from around the world.

Rise and Shine

Ray’s Daily

April 25, 2022

http://rays-daily.com

“Think positive, be positive and positive things will happen.”

Unknown

Create your own sunshine – simple inspire and motivational quote. Hand drawn beautiful lettering. Print for inspirational poster, t-shirt, bag, cups, card, flyer, sticker, badge. Cute and funny vector

It was a summer like Saturday, I did venture out to brunch with a friend. Other than that I succumbed to Spring Fever and dosed most of the day. I could not let myself stay lazy all weekend so I did finish a few critical tasks on Sunday.

This week will include multiple opportunities I just need to stay positive to take advantage of them.

Thinking positively

  • If you want to get somewhere, you have to know where you want to go and how to get there. Then never, never, never give up.
  • The secret of life isn’t what happens to you, but what you do with what happens to you.
  • Help other people to cope with their problems and your own will be easier to cope with.
  • Never use the word impossible seriously again. Toss it into the verbal wastebasket.
  • Self-trust is the first secret of success. So believe in and trust yourself.
  • Stand up to your obstacles and do something about them. You will find that they haven’t half the strength you think they have.
  • Joy increases as you give it, and diminishes as you try to keep it for yourself. In giving it, you will accumulate a deposit of joy greater than you ever believed possible.
  • How you think about a problem is more important than the problem itself – so always think positively.
  • Go at life with abandon; give it all you’ve got. And life will give all it has to you.

Norman Vincent Peale

~~~

“Don’t be pushed around by the fears in your mind. Be led by the dreams in your heart.”

Roy T. Bennett

~~~

The foolish man seeks happiness in the distance; the wise grows it under his feet.”

James Oppenheim

~~~

A sailor, while bringing flowers to a cemetery, noticed an old Chinese man placing a bowl of rice on a nearby grave. The sailor walked up to the man and asked, “When do you expect your friend to come up and eat the rice?”

The old Chinese man replied with a smile, “Same time your friend comes up to smell the flowers.”

~~~

“The person who says it cannot be done should not interrupt the person doing it.”

Chinese proverb

~~~

A precious little girl walks into a pet shop and asks, in the sweetest little lisp, between two missing teeth, “Excuthe me, mithter, do you keep widdle wabbits?”

As the shopkeeper’s heart melts, he gets down on his knees so that he’s on her level and asks, “Do you want a widdle white wabbit, or a thoft and fuwwy bwack wabbit, or maybe one like that cute widdle bwown wabbit over there?”

She, in turn, blushes, rocks on her heels, puts her hands on her knees, leans forward, and says in a tiny quiet voice, “I don’t think my python weally gives a thit”.

~~~

“Man has never made any material as resilient as the human spirit.”

Bernard Williams

~~~

A generally good-humored boss was finally compelled to call an employee into his office about the sick leave policy. “It has not escaped my attention,” he pointed out, “that every time there’s a home game at the stadium, you have to take your aunt to the doctor.”

“You know you’re right, sir,” exclaimed the bashfully grinning employee. “I didn’t realize it. You don’t suppose she’s faking it, do you?”

~~~

Why does life keep teaching me lessons I have no desire to learn?

~~~

It was a typical Fall Saturday and the wife happened upon her husband sprawled on the couch, beer in hand, staring at a college football game on the TV. After taking in the scene a few moments, she said, “Ya know George, somehow I find it difficult to believe that you’re the end product of millions of years of evolution.

~~~

Q: How many computer programmers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A: None, that’s a hardware problem.

~~~

Two blondes were sipping their Starbucks when a truck went past loaded up with rolls of sod. “I’m going to do that when I win the lottery,” … announced Blonde #1.

“Do what?” asked Blonde #2.

“Send my lawn out to be mowed.

~~~

“If you have a positive attitude and constantly strive to give your best effort, eventually you will overcome your immediate problems and find you are ready for greater challenges.”

Pat Riley

~~~

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than twenty years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@comcast.net. Back issues are posted at http://rays-daily,com/ currently there are hundreds of  readers from around the world.

We Can

Ray’s Daily

April 22,2022

http://rays-daily.com

“You’ll never find a better sparring partner than adversity.”

Golda Meir

We face a lot of challenges these days. We get to decide if they will hold us back or do we want to mitigate them the best we can. We can stay vaccinated for the Covid and the flu to protect our selves. We cah help fight the climate chagne by holding our energy usage down. We can reduce the impact of inflation by being more frugal than we have been. It is nice to know that even though we can’t do much we can do something.

The Weeds in Our Lives

Isn’t it amazing how you never have to water your weeds or nurture them and they still give you an unwanted crop? I can remember as a young boy growing up in Santa Cruz, California my grandfather showed me how to dig up this pesky weed called Bermuda grass. It was terrible stuff and it would really spread if you didn’t get it out by the roots.

That was then. But more recently when my wife and I bought our first home about 8 years ago; guess what I had to deal with? If you said weeds, you are correct. There was this certain patch of weeds that was similar to the Bermuda grass. In other words, just as invasive.

After getting the inside of our home settled, it was time to work on the outside. On my hands and knees I vigorously attacked the weeds with a small hand trowel getting each one out by the roots. Spring after, spring that was my ritual.

Just this Spring I realized that one particular weed was no longer prevalent but another one was in full force. So again, I got down on my hands and knees and got to work ridding them from my yard. When I was finished, my yard was better off.

What hidden message is this true story purveying? Sometimes our life can be oh so similar. Yes, we all have weeds in our life. These weeds can be challenges, setbacks, negative beliefs, or naysayers, and the list can go on and on.

The solution is when dealing with these weeds of life is to get to the root of it and remove them one by one and eventually you will conquer this round. And when another crop of weeds shows up, deal with them directly before they spread, because now that you know what to do with them by getting to the root of it, it will give you more courage and wisdom the next time a problem crops up.

You could say we all need weeds in our life to challenge us to grow. Once you know how to handle the weeds in your yard to make it beautiful – so too will your life be.

Written by Tony Masiello

~~~

“We don’t develop courage by being happy every day. We develop it by surviving difficult times and challenging adversity.”

Barbara De Angelis

~~~

George, a career Army officer I once met, was jumpmaster for his unit and was taking up a few novices for a drop.  The flight was pretty rough, and, after a while, George called off the jump because of high winds.  As the plane headed back to base, and the pilot pulled off an unusually smooth landing, two of the neophytes got airsick. 

“How come you could take that rough flight, but you couldn’t handle the smooth landing?” asked George.

“Well, Sir,” one trainee explained, “we’ve always jumped out of planes. We’ve never actually landed before.”

~~~

Something popped into my mind and left right away. Maybe it was lonely.

~~~

After a long, dry sermon, the minister announced that he wished to meet with the church board following the close of the service.

The first man to arrive and greet the minister was a total stranger.  “You misunderstood my announcement.  This is a meeting of the board members,” explained the minister.

“I know,” said the man, “but if there is anyone here more bored than I am, then I’d like to meet him.”

~~~

I want to sing like the birds sing, not worrying about who hears or what they think.

~~~

HOME HINTS – Martha Stewart’s Way Vs The Real Woman’s Way

Martha’s way #1: Stuff a miniature marshmallow in the bottom of a sugar cone to prevent ice cream drips.

The Real Women’s Way: Just suck the ice cream out of the bottom of the cone, for Pete’s sake, you are probably lying on the couch with your feet up eating it anyway.

Martha’s way #2: To keep potatoes from budding, place an apple in the bag with the potatoes.

The Real Women’s Way: Buy Hungry Jack mashed potato mix and keep it in the pantry for up to a year.

Martha’s way #3: When a cake recipe calls for flouring the baking pan, use a bit of the dry cake mix instead and there won’t be any white mess on the outside of the cake.

The Real Women’s Way: Go to the bakery. They’ll even decorate it for you.

Martha’s way #4: If you accidentally over salt a dish while it’s still cooking, drop in a peeled potato and it will absorb the excess salt for an instant “fix me up.”

The Real Women’s Way: If you over salt a dish while you are cooking, that’s too damn bad. Please recite with me: The Real Women’s motto: I made it and you will eat it and Idon’t care how bad it tastes.

Martha’s way #5: Wrap celery in aluminum foil when putting in the refrigerator and it will keep for weeks.

The Real Women’s Way: Celery? Never heard of the stuff.

Martha’s way #6: Brush some beaten egg white over pie crust before baking to yield a beautiful glossy finish.

The Real Women’s Way: The Mrs. Smith frozen pie directions do not include brushing egg whites over the crust and so I don’t do it.

Martha’s way #7: Cure for headaches: Take a lime, cut it in half and rub it on your forehead. The throbbing will go away.

The Real Women’s Way: Martha, dear, the only reason this works is because you can’t rub a lime on your forehead without getting lime juice in your eye, and then the problem isn’t the headache anymore, it is because you are now BLIND!

Martha’s way #8: If you have a problem opening jars: Try using latex dishwashing gloves. They give a non slip grip that makes opening jars easy.

The Real Women’s Way: Go ask the very cute neighbor to do it.

And finally the most important tip……

Martha’s way #9: Don’t throw out all that leftover wine. Freeze into ice cubes for future use in casseroles and sauces.

The Real Women’s Way: Leftover wine?

~~~

A pedestrian hit me and went under my car.

~~~

A little old lady gets onto a crowded bus and stands in front of a seated young girl. Holding her hand to her chest, she says to the girl, “If you knew what I have, you would give me your seat.”

The girl gets up and gives up her the seat to the old lady.

It is hot. The girl then takes out a fan and starts fanning herself.

The woman looks up and says, “If you knew what I have, you would give me that fan.”

The girl gives her the fan, too. Fifteen minutes later the woman gets up and says to the bus driver, “Stop, I want to get off here.”

The bus driver tells her he has to drop her at the next corner, not in the middle of the block. With her hand across her chest, she tells the driver, “If you knew what I have, you would let me off the bus right here.”

The bus driver pulls over and opens the door to let her out. As she’s walking out of the bus, he asks, “Madam, what is it you have?”

The old woman looks at him and nonchalantly replies, “Chutzpah.”

~~~

“The most beautiful people I’ve known are those who have known trials, have known struggles, have known loss, and have found their way out of the depths.”

Elizabeth Kübler-Ross

~~~

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than twenty years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@comcast.net. Back issues are posted at http://rays-daily,com/ currently there are hundreds of  readers from around the world.

Stay Hopeful

Ray’s Daily

April 21, 2022

http://rays-daily.com

“Hope is the last thing ever lost.”

Italian proverb.

Even during the toughest times we need to believe that better days will come. If we lose hope we lose the reason to go on. I think the best medicine for most of what ails us is hope. Here is a poem by Emily Dickinson describing hope.

Hope is the thing with feathers

Hope is the thing with feathers

That perches in the soul,

And sings the tune without the words,

And never stops at all,

And sweetest in the gale is heard;

And sore must be the storm

That could abash the little bird

That kept so many warm.

I’ve heard it in the chillest land,

And on the strangest sea;

Yet, never, in extremity,

It asked a crumb of me.

~~~

“Never give up. Have hope. Expect only the best from life and take action to get it.”

Catherine Pulsifer.

~~~

“Didn’t Your Mother Tell You?”

PAUL REVERE’S MOTHER: “I don’t care where you think you have to go, young man. Midnight is past your curfew!”

MARY, MARY, QUITE CONTRARY’S MOTHER: “I don’t mind you having a garden, Mary, but does it have to be growing under your bed?”

MONA LISA’S MOTHER: “After all that money your father and I spent on braces, Mona, that’s the biggest smile you can give us?”

HUMPTY DUMPTY’S MOTHER: “Humpty, If I’ve told you once, I’ve told you a hundred times not to sit on that wall. But would you listen to me? Noooo!”

COLUMBUS’ MOTHER: “I don’t care what you’ve discovered, Christopher. You still could have written!”

BABE RUTH’S MOTHER: “Babe, how many times have I told you — quit playing ball in the house! That’s the third broken window this week!”

MICHELANGELO’S MOTHER: “Mike, can’t you paint on walls like other children? Do you have any idea how hard it is to get that stuff off the ceiling?”

NAPOLEON’S MOTHER: “All right, Napoleon. If you aren’t hiding your report card inside your jacket, then take your hand out of there and prove it!”

CUSTER’S MOTHER: “Now, George, remember what I told you — don’t go biting off more than you can chew!”

ABRAHAM LINCOLN’S MOTHER: “Again with the stovepipe hat, Abe? Can’t you just wear a baseball cap like the other kids?”

BARNEY’S MOTHER: “I realize strained plums are your favorite, Barney, but you’re starting to look a little purple.”

MARY’S MOTHER: “I’m not upset that your lamb followed you to school, Mary, but I would like to know how he got a better grade than you.”

BATMAN’S MOTHER: “It’s a nice car, Bruce, but do you realize how much the insurance is going to be?”

GOLDILOCKS’ MOTHER: “I’ve got a bill here for a busted chair from the Bear family. You know anything about this, Goldie?”

LITTLE MISS MUFFET’S MOTHER: “Well, all I’ve got to say is if you don’t get off your tuffet and start cleaning your room, there’ll be a lot more spiders around here!”

ALBERT EINSTEIN’S MOTHER: “But, Albert, it’s your senior picture. Can’t you do something about your hair? Styling gel, mousse, something…?”

GEORGE WASHINGTON’S MOTHER: “The next time I catch you throwing money across the Potomac, you can kiss your allowance good-bye!”

JONAH’S MOTHER: “That’s a nice story, but now tell me where you’ve really been for the last three days.”

SUPERMAN’S MOTHER: “Clark, your father and I have discussed it, and we’ve decided you can have your own telephone line. Now will you quit spending so much time in all those phone booths?”

THOMAS EDISON’S MOTHER: “Of course I’m proud that you invented the electric light bulb, Thomas. Now turn off that light and get to bed!”

~~~

Being evil means never having to say you’re sorry.

~~~

One Christmas, a parent decreed that she was no longer going to remind her children of their thank-you note duties. As a result their grandmother never received acknowledgments of the generous checks she had given. The next year things were different, however.

“The children came over in person to thank me,” the grandparent told a friend triumphantly.

“How wonderful!” the friend exclaimed. “What do you think caused the change in their behavior?”

“Oh, that’s easy…” the grandmother replied with a chuckle…

“This year I didn’t sign the checks.”

~~~

Those who bring sunshine into the lives of others, cannot keep it from themselves.

James M. Barrie:

~~~

A gal walked up to the front desk of the library and said, “I borrowed a book last week, but it was the most boring I’ve ever read. There was no story whatsoever, and there were far too many characters!”
The librarian replied, “Oh, you must be the person who took our phone book.”

~~~

“I put my air conditioner in backwards. It got cold outside. The weatherman on TV was confused. ‘It was supposed to be hot today, I don’t understand!'”

Steven Wright

~~~

A teacher asked one of her pupils, “What’s the nation’s capital?”

The reply was, “Washington DC.”

After the teacher asked the pupil what ‘DC’ stood for, the student added, “Dot com!”

~~~

“It’s really a wonder that I haven’t dropped all my ideals, because they seem so absurd and impossible to carry out. Yet I keep them, because in spite of everything, I still believe that people are really good at heart.”

Anne Frank.

~~~

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than twenty years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@comcast.net. Back issues are posted at http://rays-daily,com/ currently there are hundreds of  readers from around the world.

Be Happy

Ray’s Daily

April 20, 2022

http://rays-daily.com

“What we choose to focus on and what we choose to ignore—plays in defining the quality of our life.”

Cal Newport

BE HAPPY colorful vector inspirational words typography banner

Ray’s Daily first published on April 20, 2006

The 92-year-old, petite, well-poised and proud lady, who is fully dressed each morning by eight o’clock, with her hair fashionably coifed and makeup perfectly applied, even though she is legally blind, moved to a nursing home today. Her husband of 70 years recently passed away, making the move necessary.

After many hours of waiting patiently in the lobby of the nursing home, she smiled sweetly when told her room was ready. As she maneuvered her walker to the elevator, I provided a visual description of her tiny room, including the eyelet sheets that had been hung on her window.

“I love it,” she stated with the enthusiasm of an eight-year-old having just been presented with a new puppy. “Mrs. Jones, you haven’t seen the room just wait.” “That doesn’t have anything to do with it,” she replied. “Happiness is something you decide on ahead of time. Whether I like my room or not doesn’t depend on how the furniture is arranged.  It’s how I arrange my mind. I already decided to love it. “It’s a decision I make every morning when I wake up. I have a choice; I can spend the day in bed recounting the difficulty I have with the parts of my body that no longer work, or get out of bed and be thankful for the ones that do. Each day is a gift, and as long as my eyes open I’ll focus on the new day and all the happy memories I’ve stored away, just for this time in my life….”

Old age is like a bank account … you withdraw from what you’ve put in. So, my advice to you would be to deposit a lot of happiness in the bank account of memories. Thank you for your part in filling my Memory bank. I am still depositing.

As hard as it may seem, we really do have a choice. It is a pity that so many seem to choose anger and despair when happiness is within their reach. Possibly it stems from how we value our lives. I will always trade a material thing for peace of mind. I wonder how many of us don’t put value on the little good things and have few blessings to count. So how about following her lead and decide to be happy today”

~~~

Happiness is not a state to arrive at, but a manner of traveling.

Margaret Lee Runbeck

~~~

She said, I am a Dominican sister, I lived in a convent named for a deceased pope. One day while I was wearing contemporary clothes instead of my habit, I drove into a gas station to get the communal car filled up.

After the young attendant topped off the tank, he walked toward my car window to return my credit card.  It was clear from his furrowed brow that he had something on his mind.

The young man looked at me shyly and pointed to the convent’s name, John XXIII Hall, imprinted on the card.

“Pardon me,” he asked hesitantly, “but how do you pronounce your husband’s middle name?”

~~~

I used to be lost in the shuffle. Now I just shuffle along with the lost.

~~~

ROMANCE MATHEMATICS

Smart man + smart woman = romance

Smart man + dumb woman = affair

Dumb man + smart woman = marriage

Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy

OFFICE ARITHMETIC

Smart boss + smart employee = profit

Smart boss + dumb employee = production

Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion

Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime

SHOPPING MATH

A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.

A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn’t need.

GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS

A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.

A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.

A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

HAPPINESS

To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.

To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.

PROPENSITY TO CHANGE

A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn’t.

A man marries a woman expecting that she won’t change, and she does.

DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE

A woman has the last word in any argument.

Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

~~~

“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.”

Eleanor Roosevelt

~~~

They say that a preacher’s wife is always his number one assistant. An example of this comes one Sunday morning after the preacher had just finished his sermon.

He went and sat down with his wife and she asked him how he thought the church service went.

The Preacher shrugged and said, “The worship was excellent, and I think the prayer time went quite well, but,” he continued, “I just don’t think the sermon ever got off the ground.”

The wife looked over at him, and before she could stop herself, she said, “Well, it sure did taxi long enough!”

~~~

One day, in retrospect, the years of struggle will strike you as the most beautiful.

Sigmund Freud

~~~

Morris and Rachel are sweethearts. Morris lives in a small village out in the country and Rachel lives in town. One day, they go to see the Rabbi and set a date for their wedding. Before they leave, the Rabbi asks them whether they want a contemporary or traditional service. After a short discussion, they opt for the contemporary service.

Their day arrives but the weather is rotten and a storm forces Morris to take an alternate route to the synagogue. The village streets are flooded, so he rolls up his trouser legs to keep his trousers dry.

When at last he reaches the shul, his best man immediately rushes him up the aisle. As the ceremony starts, the Rabbi whispers to Morris, “Pull down your trousers.”

“Rabbi, I’ve changed my mind,” says Morris, “I think I prefer the traditional service.”

~~~

Consciousness: that annoying time between naps.

~~~

A blonde was shopping at a Target Store and came across a silver thermos.  She was quite fascinated by it, so she picked it up and brought it over to the clerk to ask what it was.

The clerk said, “Why, that’s a thermos…..it keeps things hot and some things cold.”

“Wow, said the blonde, “that’s amazing….I’m going to buy it !” So she bought the thermos and took it to work the next day. Her boss saw it on her desk. “What’s that,’ he asked? “Why, that’s a thermos…..it keeps hot things hot and cold things cold,” she replied.

Her boss inquired, “What do you have in it?”

The blond replied, “Two popsicles, and some coffee.”

~~~

Why is it called ‘after dark’, when it is really after light?

~~~

A man looked at the menu at the airport restaurant, and saw that the sandwiches were named for planes.  “I’ll have a Jumbo Jet,” he said.  When the order arrived, he was disappointed to see how small his burger was, but he ate it anyway.

He called his waiter over and asked, “Was that the Jumbo Jet?”

“Yeah,” the waiter answered.  “Went pretty fast, didn’t it?”

~~~

“You can have peace of mind only if you forgive rather than judge.”

~~~

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than twenty years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@comcast.net. Back issues are posted at http://rays-daily,com/ currently there are hundreds of  readers from around the world.

Don’t Drop Out

Ray’s Daily

April 19, 2022

http://rays-daily.com

Cherish your excitement while you have it.

Lucy Varna

Sometimes I feel like taking it easy and dropping out, but if I did I would miss most of the things important to me. I know it is not easy for my wife these days and our daily visits together are good for us both. She does not remember some of our lifes highlights, but I do and that is enough for both of us.

I am fortunate to also have a caring family members and neighbors who are my good friends. One of the highlights of my days is when I prepare Ray’s Daily, my primary contact with so many of you.

I am still open to new things and I hope you are also.If you need to recharge you might find these thoughts of Marc Chernoff’s to be helpful.

10 Little Things to Remember When Life No Longer Excites You

Here are some little things worth remembering:

  1. A big part of your life is a result of the choices you make. And if you don’t like your life – if it completely lacks excitement and passion – it’s time to start making changes and better choices.
  2. Life is to be enjoyed, not endured. You CAN follow a path that moves you. You are always free to do something small and positive that makes you happy.
  3. There is good reason why you should wake each morning and mindfully consider what and who you will give your day to. Because unlike other things in life – money, entertainment, obligations, etc. – time is the one thing you can never get back once it’s gone.
  4. It’s not what you say, but how you spend your time. If you really want to do something, you’ll find a way. If you don’t, you’ll find an excuse.
  5. Your passion is an inherent part of you. Never give up on something that you can’t go a day without thinking about. Nothing you have that much passion for is ever a waste of time, no matter how it turns out in the long run.
  6. When you focus your heart and mind upon a meaningful purpose, and commit yourself to fulfill that purpose a little bit every day, positive energy gradually floods into your life.
  7. We have to stop telling ourselves that other people are our reason for being unhappy, unfulfilled, etc. They aren’t in the long run.
  8. The more we fill our lives with genuine passion and purpose the less time and energy we’ll waste looking for approval and admiration from everyone else.
  9. Your body may eventually grow tired, you may lie awake some nights listening to your past regrets, you may miss your only love, you may see the world around you overcome by negativity, or know your respect has been trampled on by unfriendly faces. There is only one thing for healing that works every time – to rediscover what excites you and then dive deeper into it. That’s the only positive effort that a battered mind can never exhaust, never alienate, never be tortured by, never fear or doubt, and never dream of regretting.
  10. Just one small step today. That’s all. True purpose has no time limit. True passion has no deadline. Don’t stress and overwhelm yourself. Just do what you can right now – just the next smallest step on a meaningful path.

~~~

They stand as hills and mountains in our way, and we can choose to climb them so we could feel the excitement of the adventure and success of freedom.

Yolanda Orozco Mendez

~~~

My friend’s husband is always telling her that housekeeping would be a snap if only she would organize her time better. Recently, he had a chance to put his theory into practice while his wife was away. When I popped in one evening to see how he was managing, he crowed, “I made a cake, frosted it, washed the kitchen windows, cleaned all the cupboards, scrubbed the kitchen floor, walls and ceiling and even had a bath.”

I was about to concede that perhaps he was a better manager than his wife, when he added sheepishly, “When I was making the chocolate frosting, I forgot to turn off the mixer before taking the beaters out of the bowl, so I had to do all the rest.”

~~~

A person without a sense of humor is like a wagon without springs –jolted by every pebble in the road.

Henry Ward Beecher

~~~

A dog walks into a bar and says, “Hey, guess what! I’m a talking dog. Ever seen a talking dog before? I doubt it! So, how about a free drink for the talking dog?”

The bartender answers, “Sure, why not? The toilet’s right around the corner.”

~~~

A cynic is not merely one who reads bitter lessons from the past; he is the one who is prematurely disappointed in the future.

Sydney J. Harris

~~~

My teenage niece was nervous as she took the wheel for her first driving lesson. As she was pulling out of the parking lot, the instructor said, “Turn left here and don’t forget to let the people behind you know what you’re doing.”

She turned to the students sitting in the back seat and announced, “I’m going left!”

~~~

What do you do when you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant?

~~~

SOUTHERN SECURITY SYSTEM !!

1. Go to a second-hand store and buy a pair of men’s used size 14-16 work boots.

2. Place them on your front porch, along with a copy of Guns & Ammo Magazine.

3. Put a few giant dog dishes next to the boots and magazines.

4. Leave a note on your door that reads:

Hey Bubba, Big Jim, Duke and Slim,

I went for more ammunition. Back in an hour. Don’t mess with the pit bulls-they attacked the mailman this morning and messed him up real bad. I don’t think Killer took part in it but it was hard to tell from all the blood. Anyway, I locked all four of ’em in the house. Better wait outside.

~~~

One nice thing about egotists: They don’t talk about other people.

~~~

One evening, a wife drew her husband’s attention to the couple next door and said, “Do you see that couple and how devoted they are? He kisses her every time they meet. Why don’t you do that?”

“I don’t know her well enough.”

~~~

We lose the excitement of trying new things. > We lose that goose – bumps feeling. Most adults give up new discoveries—which translates into falling into a rut.

Ralph Monti

~~

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than twenty years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@comcast.net. Back issues are posted at http://rays-daily,com/ currently there are hundreds of  readers from around the world.

Keep Learning

Ray’s Daily

April 18, 2022

http://rays-daily.com

Knowledge speaks, but wisdom listens.

Jimi Hendrix

I have found that even though I am not as active as I once was there is still a lot I don’t know. I am glad that I have my computer and a smart TV that provides so many paths to wisdom. I also have many smart neighbors who provide enlightenment. It is this abundance of knowledge that keeps my life interesting.

Here is a story about enjoying what the school of life has to offer.

Learn of Me

A merchant, an old man, and his little daughter met by the side of a fountain of clear, sparkling waters. On the fountain was an inscription that read, “Learn of me!”

The merchant said he learned a great lesson from the fountain. It started as a trickle of water, but as it wended its way to the sea, it was joined by streams and brooks and creeks and, in due course, became a roaring river. We should do our work likewise, start with little beginnings and soon develop big businesses.

The old man said that the lesson he learned from the fountain was to serve silently, friends and strangers alike.

The little girl said that the lesson she learned was that the water is useless unless it is pure. Therefore, we should live a clean and chaste life.

The teacher is one. Everyone learns according to his or her aptitude and capacity. In this school of life the day on which we have not learned something new is a lost day indeed.

J.P. Vaswani

~~~

Wisdom is not a product of schooling but of the lifelong attempt to acquire it.

Albert Einstein

~~~

The University of California at Berkley has recently announced the discovery of the heaviest element yet known to science. This new element has been tentatively named “Administratium”. Administratium has 1 neutron, 12 assistant neutrons, 75 deputy neutrons, and 111 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312. These 312 particles are held together by a force called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons.

Since Administratium has no electrons, it is inert. However, it can be detected because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. A minute amount of Administratium causes one reaction to take over 4 days to complete when it would normally take less than a second. Administratium has a normal half-life of 3 years; it does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons and assistant deputy neutrons exchange places.

In fact, Administratium’s mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganization causes some morons to become neutrons forming isodopes. This characteristic of moron-promotion leads some scientists to speculate that Administratium is formed whenever morons reach a certain quantity in concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as “Critical Morass.” You’ll know it when you see it.

~~~

“Who dares nothing, need hope for nothing.”

J.C.F. von Schiller

~~~

LETTER FROM A FARM KID, (NOW AT San Diego MARINE CORPS RECRUIT TRAINING.)

Dear Ma and Pa,

          I am well. Hope you are. Tell Brother Walt and Brother Elmer the Marine Corps beats working for old man Minch by a mile. Tell them to join up quick before all of the places are filled. I was restless at first because you got to stay in bed till nearly 6 A.M. but I am getting so I like to sleep late. Tell Walt and Elmer all you do before breakfast is smooth your cot, and shine some things. No hogs to slop, feed to pitch, mash to mix, wood to split, fire to lay. Practically nothing. Men got to shave but it is not so bad, there’s warm water. Breakfast is strong on trimmings like fruit juice, cereal, eggs, bacon, etc., but kind of weak on chops, potatoes, ham, steak, fried eggplant, pie and other regular food, but tell Walt and Elmer you can always sit by the two city boys that live on coffee. Their food plus yours holds you till noon when you get fed again.

         It’s no wonder these city boys can’t walk much. We go on “route marches,” which the platoon sergeant says are long walks to harden us. If he thinks so, it’s not my place to tell him different. A “route march” is about as far as to our mailbox at home. Then the city guys get sore feet and we all ride back in trucks. The country is nice but awful flat. The sergeant is like a school teacher. He nags a lot. The Captain is like the school board. Majors and colonels just ride around and frown. They don’t bother you none.

         This next will kill Walt and Elmer with laughing. I keep getting medals for shooting. I don’t know why. The bulls-eye is near as big as a chipmunk head and don’t move, and it ain’t shooting at you like the Higgett boys at home. All you got to do is lie there all comfortable and hit it. You don’t even load your own cartridges. They come in boxes.

          Then we have what they call hand-to-hand combat training. You get to wrestle with them city boys. I have to be real careful though, they break real           easy. It ain’t like fighting with that ole bull at home. I’m about the best they got in this except for that Tug Jordan from over in Silver Lake. I only beat him once. He joined up the same time as me, but I’m only 5’6″ and 130 pounds and he’s 6’8″ and near 300 pounds dry.

          Be sure to tell Walt and Elmer to hurry and join before other fellers get onto this setup and come stampeding in.

Your loving daughter,

Carol

~~~

“Remember: the average is as close to the bottom as it is to the top.”

~~~

The Priest had just finished hearing the man’s confession and was considering the man’s penitence.

“Are you sure you’re going to try to set aside all sin?”

“Yes, Father, I certainly am going to try.” replied the man. “I hereby resolve to double my efforts.”

“And you’re going to attend Mass regularly my son?” the Priest went on.

“Yes, Father, I realize I have strayed.” said the man. “I shall both worship and confess every week.”

“And how about your debts and those you have cheated?” inquired the Priest.

“Now just a minute, Father.” said the man. “Now you’re talking business, not religion.”

~~~

A symptom of wisdom is curiosity. The evidence is calmness and perseverance. The causes are experimentation and understanding.

Maxime Lagacé

~~~

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than twenty years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@comcast.net. Back issues are posted at http://rays-daily,com/ currently there are hundreds of  readers from around the world.

Tag Cloud