Ray's musings and humor

Archive for May, 2020

My Best Friends

Ray’s Daily

May 29. 2020

http://rays-daily.com

Good friends are like stars. You don’t always see them, but you know they’re always there.

Best Friends

Yesterday was my youngest daughter’s birthday and next Monday it will be my oldest daughter’s birthday. They both have had great careers and provided us with four wonderful grandchildren.

These accomplished women have also become my wife’s and my best friends. We have always been close but never as close as we are now. You see they have become our best friends. They are responsible making our senior years as golden as they are for us.

The following poem could have been written about our best friends, our daughters.

 

           Friends

Friends answer your needs before their own.
You come to them with your hunger,
And they satisfy you with peace.
That’s how friends are.

 

Friends let you speak your mind,
Without worrying what their thoughts will be.
Friends know when you are silent,
They need to listen your heart.

 Friends share the joy and the pain.
They know about desire and rejection.
Friends allow you to be who you are,
Without expectations of who you should be.

 

Friends don’t come with a purpose,
They don’t come with a plan.
They come to enlighten your spirit,
They come to brighten your heart.

 They come to give you a hand when needed
And expect nothing in return.
It is the little things that friends do.
Like fill your heart with pleasure, hope and joy.

 AAHH… The Sweetness Of Friendship
There can be no price placed on Friendship
It has once been told.
For Friendships are worth far more than gold.

~~~

Anything is possible when you have the right people there to support you.

Misty Copeland

~~~

Be careful, many of these laws are still on the books

1-When visiting Louisiana, remember that it is illegal to gargle in public…you can do just about anything else in public, but NO gargling!

2-And be careful that you do not get caught shaving while driving in Massachusetts or you’ll be in real trouble.

3-If you’re going to be driving through Utah, be alert because the birds have the right of way on the state highways.

4-And walking down the streets of Maine with your shoes strings untied is

also illegal.

5-Oh, and in Atlanta, not only is it illegal to tie your giraffe to a telephone pole but if you get caught dressing a mannequin without shutting the window shades, you could be in big trouble.

6-When in Nebraska, keep in mind not to spit against wind because not only is it messy, its also illegal.

7-Eating out in Connecticut became so much more pleasant once the law requiring restaurateurs to provide separate nose-blowing and non-nose-blowing sections, went into effect.

8-And if you decide to order cherry pie while eating in Kansas, don’t waste your time asking it to be served with a scoop of ice-cream on top…it against the law.

9-In California, its against the law to peel an orange in your hotel room….I guess its ok to peel it in the hallway & then go into your room.

10-If you’re planning to do any fishing while visiting Chicago, be sure you don’t do it in your pajamas or you might spend the rest of your vacation in jail.

11-And if you’re going to set a fire under your mule, don’t do it in Ohio..yep, its against the law. Can you believe it?

12-Whistling under water will result in more than getting water in your nose, it will also get you put in jail if you do it in Vermont.

13-And while you and your beloved spouse are enjoying the Florida sun, don’t throw dishes if you happen to have a little disagreement with each other. If you break more than 3 a day, you could spend the rest of your vacation eating off of metal trays in the county jail.

We’re not the only ones with the wacky laws. If you’re planning a trip out of the country be aware that….

14-It is illegal to land a flying saucer in the vineyards of France.

15-And last but not least, if you take ill while in Iceland, never seek medical help from anyone who’s shingle reads: “Scottulaejnir”. You see, ANYONE, can practice medicine in Iceland as long as they display this sign. Loosely translated it means, “Quack Doctor”

~~~

“Laziness is nothing more than the habit of resting before you get tired.”

Jules Renard

~~~

I had just pulled into a parking spot at the home improvement store when smoke and flames began pouring from under my hood. Frantic, I bolted into the store and ran up to the first clerk I saw. As luck would have it, he was standing behind the customer service counter.

“Please help,” I gasped. “My car’s on fire! I need a fire extinguisher!”

Without even looking up, he replied, “Aisle 12.”

~~~

The airline was so cheap that instead of a movie, they put on a high school play.

~~~

She said: I’m writing you to let you know that I have recently been diagnosed with a serious condition and there’s little hope of getting over it. The scientific world is frantically searching for a cure. This is an ailment others also suffer from and may be undiagnosed. It’s called “Butfirst Syndrome.” It’s like when I decide to do the laundry – I start down the hall and notice the newspaper on the table. Okay, I’m going to do the laundry – Butfirst I’m going to read the newspaper. After that, I notice the mail on the table. Okay, I’ll just put the newspaper in the recycle stack, – Butfirst, I’ll look through that pile of mail and see if there are any bills to be paid. Now where’s the checkbook? Oops!

There’s the empty glass from yesterday on the coffee table. I’m going to look for that checkbook, – Butfirst I need to put the glass in the sink.

I head for the kitchen, look out the window, notice my poor flowers need a drink of water. I put the glass in the sink, and darn it, there’s the remote for the TV on the kitchen counter. What’s it doing here? I’ll just put it away, – Butfirst I need to water those plants. Head for door and Ack! Stepped on the dog, who needs to be fed. Okay, I’ll put that remote away and water the plants. – Butfirst I need to feed the dog. At the end of day; Laundry is not done, newspapers are still on the floor, glass is still in the sink, bills are unpaid, checkbook is still missing, and the dog ate the remote control. AND, when I try to figure out how come nothing got done all day, I’m baffled, because I KNOW I was BUSY ALL DAY! I realize this condition is serious…and I should get help. Butfirst I think I’ll read all my email!

~~~

“The trouble with jogging is that the ice falls out of your glass.”

Martin Mull

~~~

A New York family bought a ranch out west where they intended to raise cattle. Friends came to visit and asked if the ranch had a name.

“Well,” said the would-be-cattleman. I wanted to call it the Bar-J, my wife favored the Suzy-Q, one son liked the Flying-W, and the other son wanted the Lazy-Y. So, we’re calling it the Bar-J-Suzy-Q-Flying-W-Lazy-Y.”

“But, where are all your cattle?”

“So far, none have survived the branding.”

~~~

Many people will walk in and out of your life, but only true friends will leave footprints in your heart.

Eleanor Roosevelt

~~~

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at http://rays-daily,com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

 

 

Still Waiting

Ray’s Daily

May 28, 2020

http://rays-daily.com

“It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are.”

E. E. Cummings

lake

Today is one of my daughter’s birthday. It is a day we use to be able to get together to celebrate but we are still being isolated to protect us from Covid19. We have been this way for months now.

As we stay isolated, I keep hearing about the many of my favorite restaurants closing for good, And even now with some reopening we are told those of us over 65 years old should still avoid them. Even the hair salons and I guess barber shops are limiting their services to those under sixty-five. Our months of quarantine have left my hair in need of massive cutting.

So while the world is opening up for others, it is not for us. It is not easy to stay upbeat but there is so much more to be grateful for than there is to mourn, but it takes some effort to realize that we are better off than millions of others. So we will continue to wait for the better days ahead as we remember the good times we have had together.

Salt, Glass of Water and the Lake

Author Unknown

Once an unhappy young man came to an old master and told he had a very sad life and asked for a solution.

The old Master instructed the unhappy young man to put a handful of salt in a glass of water and then to drink it. “How does it taste?” – the Master asked.

“Terrible.” – spat the apprentice.

The Master chuckled and then asked the young man to take another handful of salt and put it in the lake. The two walked in silence to the nearby lake and when the apprentice swirled his handful of salt into the lake.

The old man said, “Now drink from the lake.”

As the water dripped down the young man’s chin, the Master asked, “How does it taste?”

“Good!” – remaked the apprentice.

“Do you taste the salt?” – asked the Master.

“No.” – said the young man.

The Master sat beside this troubled young man, took his hands, and said, “The pain of life is pure salt; no more, no less. The amount of pain in life remains the same, exactly the same. But the amount we taste the ‘pain’ depends on the container we put it into. So when you are in pain, the only thing you can do is to enlarge your sense of things. Stop being a glass. Become a lake.”

~~~

“If you don’t make the time to work on creating the life you want, you’re eventually going to be forced to spend a LOT of time dealing with a life you DON’T want.”

Kevin Ngo

~~~

Flying can be interesting; here are some flight announcements from the past.

  • In the event of a sudden loss of cabin pressure, masks will descend from the ceiling. Stop screaming, grab the mask, and pull it over your face. If you have a small child traveling with you, secure your mask before assisting with theirs. If you are traveling with more than one small child, pick your favorite.
  • Weather at our destination is 50 degrees with some broken clouds, but we’ll try to have them fixed before we arrive. Thank you, and remember, nobody loves you, or your money, more than Southwest Airlines.”
  • “Your seat cushions can be used for flotation; and in the event of an emergency water landing, please paddle to shore and take them with our compliments.”

~~~

“You know that old saying, ‘Strike while the iron is hot?’ Well, I think that’s a pretty dumb saying, ’cause I’ll betcha a cold iron will hurt like hell, too.”

Charlie Acord

~~~

10 WAYS TO KNOW IF YOU HAVE “ESTROGEN ISSUES”

  1. Everyone around you has an attitude problem.
  2. You’re adding chocolate chips to your cheese omelet.
  3. The dryer has shrunk every last pair of your jeans.
  4. Your husband is suddenly agreeing to everything you say.
  5. You’re using your cellular phone to dial up every bumper sticker that says: “How’s my driving-call 1-800-***-.”
  6. Everyone’s head looks like an invitation to batting-practice.
  7. You’re convinced there’s a God and he’s male.
  8. You can’t believe they don’t make a tampon bigger than Super Plus.
  9. You’re sure that everyone is scheming to drive you crazy.
  10. The ibuprofen bottle is empty and you bought it yesterday.

~~~

“If you think it’s hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball.”

Jack Lemmon

~~~

A lady leaves Montreal on route 20 heading toward Quebec city, when she decided to stop at a comfort station. The first toilet stall was occupied, so she went into the second one. She was no sooner seated than she heard a voice from the next stall:

“Hi, how are you doing?”

Well, she wasn’t the type to chat with strangers in highway comfort stations, and she really don’t know quite what possessed her, but anyway, she answered, a little embarrassed: “Not bad.”

The stranger said: “And, what are you up to?”

Talk about your dumb questions! She was really beginning to think this was too weird! So she said: “Well, just like you I am driving east?”

About then she heard the stranger, all upset, say: “Look, I’ll call ya right back, there’s some idiot in the next stall answering all the questions I’m asking you. Bye!”

~~~

“The pen is mightier than the sword, and considerably easier to write with.”

Marty Feldman

~~~

Coming out of church, Mrs. Peterson asked her husband, “Do you think that Johnson girl is tinting her hair?”

“I didn’t even see her,” admitted Mr. Peterson.

“And that dress Mrs. Hansen was wearing,” continued Mrs. Peterson, “Really, don’t tell me you think that’s the proper costume for a mother of two.”

“I’m afraid I didn’t notice that either,” said Mr. Peterson.

“Oh, for heaven’s sake,” snapped Mrs. Peterson.  “A lot of good it does you to go to church.”

~~~

“Why is it that all of the instruments seeking intelligent life in the universe are pointed away from Earth?”

~~~

Mr. Peterson, a tourist from Toronto arrived in Florida.

In an airport taxi cab, Peterson asked the driver…”Say, is this really a healthful place?”

“It sure is,” the cabby replied. “When I came here I couldn’t say one word. I had hardly any hair on my head. I didn’t have the strength to walk across a room, and I had to be lifted out of bed.”

“That’s wonderful!” said the tourist , “How long have you been here?”

“I was born here.”

~~~

Contrary to popular belief, used-car salesmen are fairly honest with their customers.  It’s usually a condition of their parole.

~~~

“Too many people are thinking the grass is greener on the other side of the fence, when they ought to just water the grass they are standing on.”

Amar Dave

~~~

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at http://rays-daily,com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

 

 

 

They Are Special

Ray’s Daily

May 27, 2020

http://rays-daily.com

Education is not the filling of a bucket, but the lighting of a fire.

B. Yeats

family

I have an early Doctor’s appointment this morning so here is the way the world looked to me eleven years ago.

Ray

Ray’s Daily first published on May 27, 2009

I, like every other grandparent, know that our grandchildren are the brightest, most attractive and highly proficient kids ever. We just sometimes wish that their parents could walk on water like they do. So OK, we might be a little prejudiced and possibly only see them at their best. But in spite of my bias I was objectively proud of two of my seven grandchildren last night. I had a grandson graduating from his parochial middle school at the same time my gymnast granddaughter was graduating from a different parochial middle school. Since my wife and I could not be at both schools at the same time she attended my grandson’s graduation at his school and I attended my granddaughters at her school.

I wish I could have been at both for both kids were recognized for their achievements. In fact my grandson was also presented with a ten thousand dollar academic scholarship from Cathedral High School, one of our leading college prep institutions. I truly enjoy both his analytical skills and his sense of humor. He is special also by his ability to balance his intense participation in both soccer and basketball and now I can also brag about his academic skill.

My granddaughter did well also, in fact she had to make multiple trips to the podium on crutches (she is recovering from knee surgery and has to wear a full leg brace) to get her awards. She also received special recognition for being one of only four kids that had straight A’s every year they attended middle school. In addition, she and one other graduate received the schools top award for a combination of academic, service and just being well liked good kids. Her school success is especially noteworthy since she was able to do so well even though she is a nationally ranked gymnast who practices for four hours a day 6 days a week and sometimes even more and has had to miss school days on occasion in order to compete in National meets all over the US and on occasion attend the National Training Camp. As I have mentioned before I have never met a better time manager or anyone who handles challenges like those, she does with so many smiles and so much grace.

I am proud of all of my grandchildren and am thankful that I have been blessed by having them in our life. I am also grateful to my children for staying here in our city so we can regularly bask in the glow of their children as they thrive and grow.

Our immortality exists in what we leave behind, in our case I think our greatest legacy will be our grandchildren and what they will do to help make our world a better place.

~~~

In a completely rational society, the best of us would aspire to be teachers and the rest of us would have to settle for something less, because passing civilization along from one generation to the next ought to be the highest honor and the highest responsibility anyone could have.

Lee Iacocca

~~~

HELPFUL HINTS FOR LIFE

  1. If you’re bidding on a job for UPS, don’t send your bid by FedEx.
  2. If your computer says, Printer out of Paper,” this problem cannot be resolved by continuously clicking the “OK” button.
  3. If you want your refrigerator’s ice maker to work, you need to hook it to a water source.  Air doesn’t make good ice unless it is mixed with water.
  4. No matter how much data you add to your laptop, it will not get heavier.
  5. A bad place to store your emergency backup diskette is on the underside of your desk drawer, secured by a large magnet.
  6. When the PC says, “Insert diskette #2,” don’t do it immediately. Remove disk #1 first, even if you’re sure you can make them both fit in there.
  7. When your PC says “You have mail,” don’t go to the company mail room and look for a package.
  8. The French version of Internet Explorer doesn’t translate English language web pages into French.
  9. If you’re in the armed services, and it’s April 1st, and you get an e-mail message to call Colonel Sanders for new orders, don’t.
  10. If you go to the computer store to buy a mousepad, you don’t have to specify whether it’s for a Windows or a Macintosh.

~~~

Hard work spotlights the character of people: some turn up their sleeves, some turn up their noses, and some don’t turn up at all.

Sam Ewing

~~~

A little girl was asked what she wanted most for her birthday and she declared: “A baby brother.”

“Daddy and I would like to give you a baby brother,” said her mom, “but there isn’t time before your birthday.”

“Why don’t you do like they do down at Daddy’s factory when they want something in a hurry?  Put more men on the job.”

~~~

Your secrets are safe with me and all my friends.

~~~

A big executive boarded a New York to Chicago train. He explained to the porter, “I’m a heavy sleeper, but I want you to be sure and wake me up at 3:00 am for the stop in Buffalo. I don’t care what I say, you just make sure I get off in Buffalo.”

The next morning the executive woke up in Chicago. He was furious. He found the porter and really gave him an earful before hustling off to purchase a return ticket.

After he left, a co-worker said to the porter, “How can you stand there and let that passenger abuse you like that?”

“That’s nothing,” said the porter. “You should have heard the guy who I put off in Buffalo!”

~~~

When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on.

Franklin D. Roosevelt

~~~

Whenever I travel by plane someone always says, “Have a safe trip.”

Since when does a safe plane flight become my responsibility?  I’m not even sure what I’m supposed to do! Go kick the tires, drug test the pilot, what?

I feel I’m doing my part by not going up to the cockpit every five minutes and asking, “Are we there yet?”

~~~

A frustrated wife told me the other day her definition of retirement: “Twice as much husband on half as much pay.”

~~~

Four little aging Jewish ladies were sitting by the pool in Miami Beach. One of them looked at the others and said: “Do you girls still like sex?”

After a few seconds of silence, one looked over and replied: “Honey, I still love Saks, Macy’s, Bloomingdales…all of those nice stores.”

~~~

Confusion not only reigns, it pours.

~~~

The other night, my wife and I were going out for dinner.

She put on eyebrow pencil, eye shadow, eyeliner, eyelashes, mascara, toner, blush and lipstick, then turned to me and said, “Does this look natural?”

~~~

Our background and circumstances may influence who we are, but we are responsible for who we become.

~~~

A man entered a stationery store and asked the clerk for a birthday/anniversary card.

The clerk replied, “We have birthday cards and we have anniversary cards. Why not take one of each?”

The man said, “You don’t understand. I need a card that covers BOTH events! You see, we’re celebrating the fifth anniversary of my wife’s thirty-fourth birthday…”

~~~

Every individual makes a difference. We cannot live through a single day without making an impact on the world around us. And we all have free choice–what sort of difference do we want to make? Do we want to make the world around us a better place? Or not?

Jane Goodall

~~~

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at http://rays-daily,com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

 

You OK?

Ray’s Daily

May 26, 2020

http://rays-daily.com

Happiness wishes everybody happy.

Victor Hugo

Be Happy

The holiday weekend is over for us in my country. In the past it always included something special. If it was not the Indianapolis 300 race, it was a cookout or at least time with our family.

These past few days were different staying in our apartment we had each other and shared memories of days gone by. We did talk to our kids. And you know what, is was enough. With all those who are suffering with the virus we are grateful for retaining our health. I am glad that we have made the choice to be happy instead of agonizing over what we can’t do.

I hope what ever your up to your as happy as we are. Here is a story that makes a lot of sense to me.

Dance Like No One’s Watching

by Crystal Boyd

We convince ourselves that life will be better after we get married, have a baby, then another. Then we’re frustrated that the kids aren’t old enough and we’ll be more content when they are. After that, we’re frustrated that we have teenagers to deal with. We’ll certainly be happy when they’re out of that stage.

We tell ourselves that our life will be complete when our spouse gets his or her act together, when we get a nicer car, are able to go on a nice vacation, when we retire.

The truth is, there’s no better time to be happy than right now. If not now, when?

Your life will always be filled with challenges. It’s best to admit this to yourself and decide to be happy anyway.

One of my favorite quotes comes from Alfred D. Souza. He said, “For a long time it had seemed to me that life was about to begin – real life. But there was always some obstacle in the way, something to be gotten through first, some unfinished business, time still to be served, or a debt to be paid. Then life would begin. At last it dawned on me that these obstacles were my life.”

This perspective has helped me to see that there is no way to happiness. Happiness is the way. So, treasure every moment that you have and treasure it more because you shared it with someone special, special enough to spend your time with…and remember that time waits for no one.

So, stop waiting until you finish school, until you go back to school, until you lose ten pounds, until you gain ten pounds, until you have kids, until your kids leave the house, until you start work, until you retire, until you get married, until you get divorced, until Friday night, until Sunday morning, until you get a new car or home, until your car or home is paid off, until spring, until summer, until fall, until winter, until you’re off welfare, until the first or fifteenth, until your song comes on, until you’ve had a drink, until you’ve sobered up, until you die, until you’re born again to decide that there is no better time than right now to be happy.

Happiness is a journey, not a destination.

~~~

Be happy — if you’re not even happy, what’s so good about surviving?

Tom Stoppard

~~~

A blonde, not my friend Mo, is on board a small two-seater plane when suddenly the pilot dies.

Not knowing how to fly a plane she grabs the radio. “Mayday, Mayday! My pilot just died!” she screams.

Ground control receives her call for help and answers back: “Don’t worry, Madam. I’ll talk you down; just do as I say. First I need you to give me your height and position.”

“I’m 5″2′ and sitting in the front.”

~~~

“Nice guys finish last, but we get to sleep in.”

Evan Davis

~~~

Now that they are retired, my mother and father are discussing all aspects of their future. “What will you do if I die before you do?” Dad asked Mom.

After some thought, she said that she’d probably look for a house sharing situation with three other single or widowed women who might be a little younger than herself, since she is so active for her age.

Then Mom asked Dad, “What will you do if I die first?”

He replied, “Probably the same thing.”

~~~

“When I woke up this morning my girlfriend asked me, ‘Did you sleep good?’

I said ‘No, I made a few mistakes.'”

Steven Wright

~~~

George had been a compulsive worrier for years until he found a way to overcome this problem. His friends noticed the dramatic change.

“You don’t seem to be worried about anything anymore.”

“I hired a professional worrier for $1000.00 a week,” George replied.

“I haven’t had a single problem since.”

“A thousand a week?” said his friend. “How the hell are you going to pay him?”

“That’s his problem.”

~~~

Trouble is a part of your life, and if you don’t share it, you don’t give the person who loves you a chance to love you enough.

Dinah Shore

~~~

The young man told his father, “I want to marry a good woman, a smart woman, one who’ll be a good mother to our kids, a woman who will make me happy.”

His father told him he’d better make up his mind.

~~~

Abandon the search for Truth; settle for a good fantasy.

~~~

Nadine: There are two men sitting alone at the bar over there.

Jill: So?

Nadine: Well, we’re two women alone sitting over here at a table. What do you think that adds up to?

Jill: Four losers?

~~~

A hug is a great gift, one size fits all. It can be given for any occasion and it’s easy to exchange.

~~~

He said: When I was a newly commissioned Lieutenant in the Army, I was assigned as a temporary assistant in an administrative office in a Military Intelligence unit.

One day a long memo came around with a cover sheet instructing all assigned officers to read it and initial it as indication of their compliance. I figured it meant me too, so I read and initialed it.

BUT a few days later, it came back addressed specifically to me.  An attached note read: “You are not permanently assigned to this unit and are thus not an authorized signee. Please erase your initials and initial your erasure.”

I did.

~~~

I do not exist to impress the world. I exist to live my life in a way that will make me happy.

Richard Bach

~~~

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at http://rays-daily,com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

What do you think?

Ray’s Daily

May 22, 2020

http://rays-daily.com

Optimism is essential to achievement and it is also the foundation of courage and true progress.”

Nicholas M. Butler

good times

Another week is about to end. The thing I like most about the weekends these days is that there is nothing I must do. In truth they are not that much different than other days as there are few things I must do. I do keep somewhat busy providing for my wife’s needs,

In my state we are lifting some of the restrictions on outside activities, but my age and medical status make it wise to just continue to stay in my apartment. What has been a pleasant surprise has been how well I seem to be doing. Sure, I would like to be able to eat out, see a play or two but I seem to be capable of enjoying what I can do. I feel sorry for those who have become so depressed that they do not believe that things will get better.

I know things may never be the same but I am confident that they will be much better than they are now. So my friends, join me in the optimistic knowledge that there are better days ahead.

Here is a short article that reminded me about how I feel.

My Views On Confidence

By Glory Fu Yu-Liang

What is confidence? Many people define confidence through materialistic images, such as one’s job, money, social status, education, or features. My views on confidence have nothing to do with outward appearances. On the contrary, I believe that confidence comes from within. In other words, confidence is a positive attitude within us that makes an outward reflection through our behavior.

Confident people are equipped with a positive mindset, as well as an honest and unbending character. When facing difficulties, they are convinced that they can overcome them, and even make plans for the better. When things don’t go their way, they focus on other possibilities. If they encounter defeat, they quickly get back on their feet and don’t allow negative emotions to linger. Even if their hard work doesn’t pay off, they still believe that at least they have tried their utmost to overcome their challenges with courage. To them what counts in success is to stay active and positive. That is confidence.

~~~

“Optimism is a strategy for making a better future. Because unless you believe that the future can be better, you are unlikely to step up and take responsibility for making it so.”

Noam Chomsky

~~~

She said, as pastor of a two-church parish, my husband had to drive every Sunday morning about six kilometers from the 9:30 service at one church to the 11 o’clock at the other. He would often find the parking lot of the second church full, and be forced to park down the road and race to the church on foot. The problem was finally solved when he selected a parking spot near the side door of the church, where he posted a sign: YOU PARK – YOU PREACH.

~~~

I was interviewing a jeweler for a story I was writing on giving new life to old jewelry, and I asked him to tell me about his most memorable client.

“It was a divorced woman who had me make a pair of earrings from her inscribed wedding band,” he remembered.  “One earring read, ‘with all,’ and the other, ‘my love.’

When I asked why she had wanted it done that way, she answered, ‘To remind me that the next time anyone says that to me, I should let in go in one ear and out the other.'”

~~~

I don’t have to attend every argument I’m invited to.

~~~

After driving up and down several lanes, I finally found a parking spot at the shopping mall. I noticed another man driving very slowly in the same direction, and, since he was closer, I gave him the “Are you going to park there?” look.

His responding gestures were very confusing. First he shook his head. Next he pointed at me, then at the parking space and then at himself, his watch and the mall. Finishing off, he frowned, raised his palms upward and shrugged. Once I parked, I walked over to the driver to make sure he didn’t want the space.

“You must be single,” he replied. “If you were married, you would’ve known that was the universal sign for ‘Go ahead and take the spot. I’m waiting for my wife.’

~~~

The greatest mistake you can make in life is to be continually fearing you will make one.

~~~

A man and his wife were lying in bed the other night when he noticed she had bought a new book entitled, “What 20 Million American Women Want.”

He grabbed the book out of her hands and started thumbing through the pages.

His wife was a little annoyed. “Hey, what do you think you’re doing?”

He calmly replied, “I just wanted to see if they spelled my name right.”

~~~

Wife:  If I left you for some man, would you be sorry?

Husband:  Why would I be sorry for a man I don’t even know.

~~~

A truck driver tried to edge his semi past the lady driver on the road ahead of him as she was obviously having difficulty deciding which lane she wanted to be in. Finally, her mind made up, the woman veered into the truck driver’s lane and jammed on her brakes, which resulted in a slight collision.

Unhurt but obviously harried, the lady driver rushed over to the truck driver and started to bawl him out, barking, “You knew I was going to do something idiotic. Why didn’t you stop to wait and see what it was?”

~~~

I always wanted to be a procrastinator, never got around to it.

~~~

A New York judge is ready to go through the day’s business and he is very rushed. The first case up involves an elderly Jewish gentleman with a long beard, payos, the works.

The judge, without asking a question, says to the clerk: “Quick…get me a translator.”

Translator shows up and the judge says: “Ask him what his name is, how old is he and where does he come from?”

The translator says: “Die judge vilt vissen, vos is dein namen, vie alt bist du, and fun vie kumst du?”

The old man smiles, looks at the judge and says in perfect English with a British accent: “Your Honour. My name is Sir Chaim Ginsbug. I shall be 82 next Thursday and I’ve come from England where I hold the chair of Hebrew Philosophy at Oxford University.”

The translator turns to the judge and says: “Ehr zukt, ehr is Sir Chaim Ginsburg, ehr is tzwei und achtzig yur alt, und ehr is, mit sach Yiddish philisoph, areingekummen fun Oxford.”

~~~

The first Ten Commandments are the hardest.

~~~

Mary:  And then he says, “You criticize everything I do!”

Jill:  I see.  And is that true?

Mary:  No!  He just never does anything right!

~~~

“The essence of optimism is that it takes no account of the present, but it is a source of inspiration, of vitality and hope where others have resigned; it enables a man to hold his head high, to claim the future for himself and not to abandon it to his enemy.”

Dietrich Bonhoeffer

~~~

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at http://rays-daily,com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

 

 

We Need Each Other

Rays Daily

May 21, 2020

http://rays-daily.com

“Alone we can do so little; together we can do so much.”

Helen Keller

together

Every day we Are reminded on TV, by neighborhood signs and via other communications that we are in this effort to control the virus together. We isolate our selves not only to protect ourselves from infection but also to make sure we do not infect others. But we are not doing this alone.

There are many that help us to stay safe and well. In our case these special people include:

  • The cooks and servers that bring us food.
  • The Nurses who check on us each day.
  • The housekeepers that clean our apartment.
  • Our family who brings us some of the basic necessities and provides transportation to our medical appointments.

I am grateful to these special people who so often are unnoticed. If it were not for them we would be in this alone.

Who really cares

The people who make a difference

Please take a moment to answer these questions:

  • Name the five wealthiest people in the world.
  • Name the last five recipients of the Australian of the Year Award.
  • Name the last five winners of the Miss World contest.
  • Name ten people who have won the Nobel Peace prize.
  • Name the last half dozen Academy Award winners for best actor and actress.
  • Name the winners of the last five World Series Cricket Series.

How did you do? The point is, none of us remember the headliners of yesterday. These are no second-rate achievers, they are the best in their fields. But the applause dies, awards tarnish and achievements are forgotten. Accolades and certificates are buried with their owners.

Here’s another set of questions. See how you do with these:

  • List a few teachers who aided your journey through school.
  • Name three friends who have helped you through a difficult time.
  • Name five people who have taught you something worthwhile.
  • Think of a few people who have made you feel appreciated and special.
  • Name a few people whose stories have inspired you.
  • Think of five people you enjoy spending time with.

Was this a little easier to complete?

So whats the message?

The people who make a difference in your life are not the ones with the most credentials, the most money, or the most awards. They are the ones that care. If you agree please pass this on to those people who have made a difference in your life.

Author Unknown

~~~

“I Can Do Things You Cannot, You Can Do Things I Cannot; Together We Can Do Great Things.”

– Mother Teresa

~~~

Bernie was unfortunate enough to be hit by a 10 ton truck and landed up in hospital in intensive care. His best friend Morris came to visit him. Bernie struggles to tell Morris, “My wife Sadie visits me three times a day. She’s so good to me. Every day, she reads to me at the bedside.”

“What does she read?”

“My life insurance policy.”

~~~

“A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history — with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila.”

Mitch Ratliffe

~~~

With only two tellers working at the bank, the line I was standing in was moving very slowly.  As I waited, I began to fill in my withdrawal slip. Not sure of the date, I turned and asked the woman behind me. “It’s the fifth,” she replied. From the back of the line a man advised, “Don’t write it in yet!”

~~~

The teacher wrote “Like I ain’t had no fun in months” on the board and then she said, “Timmy, how should I correct that?”

Timmy replied, “Maybe get a new boyfriend ?”

~~~

A congregant asked his Rabbi, “Rabbi, you’re a man of God. So why is it that you are always talking business when I, a businessman, am always talking about spiritual matters when I’m not at work?”

“You have discovered one of the principles of human nature,” the Rabbi replied.

“And what principle is that, Rabbi?”

“People like to discuss things they know nothing about.”

~~~

Discover wildlife!  Have kids!

~~~

A doctor was awakened at four in the morning by a caller who demanded to know how much he charged for a house call.

“Twenty-five dollars,” muttered the sleepy physician.

“How much is an office visit?” demanded the caller.

“Fifteen dollars.”

“Okay, Doc,” said the caller. “I’ll meet you in your office in fifteen minutes.”

~~~

Well Bill, how are you getting on with trying to date that new cocktail waitress?” “Not so bad. I’m getting some encouragement now.” “Really, is she beginning to smile sweetly at you or something?” “Not exactly, but last night she said that she’s said ‘NO’ for the last time.”

~~~

Lord, if I can’t be skinny, let all my friends be fat.

~~~

My boss’ wife Sherry was exasperated with her younger sister, who bought an unreliable car and called for a ride every time it broke down. One day Sherry got yet another one of those calls. “What happened this time?” she asked. “My brakes went out,” her sister said. “Can you come to get me?” “Where are you?” Sherry asked. “I’m in the drugstore,” her sister responded. “And where’s the car?” “It’s in here with me.”

~~~

Murphy’s Technology Law #2:

Logic is a systematic method of coming to the wrong conclusion with confidence.

~~~

A DC-10 had an exceedingly long rollout after landing with his approach speed a little high. San Jose Tower: “American 751 heavy, turn right at the end of the runway, if able.  If not able, take the Guadalupe exit off Highway 101 and make a right at the light to return to the airport.”

~~~

A woman sees a beautiful tennis bracelet in a jewelry store window.  She goes in and asks the clerk if a small deposit will hold it until her husband does something unforgivable.

~~~

“Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go.” –

Oscar Wilde

~~~

“How long have you been driving without a tail light?” asked the policeman after pulling over a motorist.

The driver jumped out, ran to the rear of his car, and gave a long, painful groan.

He seemed so upset that the cop was moved to ease up on him a bit.

“Come on, now,” he said, “you don’t have to take it so hard.  It isn’t that serious.”

“It isn’t?” cried the motorist.  “Then you know what happened to my boat and trailer?”

~~~

“Coming together is a beginning, staying together is progress, and working together is success.”

Henry Ford

~~~

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at http://rays-daily,com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

 

 

We can do something

Ray’s Daily

May 20, 2020

http://rays-daily.com

Only a life lived for others is a life worthwhile.

Albert Einstein

we can do it

These have been the worst of times for millions. Too many have become infected with the Corona Virus and thousands have died of the illness, In my country we are on the verge of removing some of the health restrictions as we open the economy.

We need to put people back to work, millions are currently without jobs, there has not been this much unemployment since the great depression. Many go hungry and depend on food pantries, in the depression we had soup kitchens. Many have little if any health care.

Now we will help some while others will lose their lives as we open up and put more at risk of infection.

It is up to us to do what we can for ourselves and for others. Over the years I have had an active role in helping to solve many of the days issues and now I find myself with little I can do, but I can do something. The article below offers suggestions as to what we all can do.

The Top 10 Things to Give This Year

by Deborah Brown-Volkman

  1. Your Time. – How many of you are too busy with you own lives to give your time to others? Being busy is an excuse and a reason not to go out of your way. People need you and love you. They want to see you. Let them in. Let them have time with you.
  2. Your Support. – How many of you really support the people in your life? What I mean by support is encouragement and reasons to try something new, not 10 different reasons why it won’t work. Just because it didn’t work for you, doesn’t mean it won’t work for them. And, just because it didn’t work for them in the past, doesn’t mean that it won’t work this time. There’s nothing better than telling a person that they can do whatever they want in this world.
  3. Your Acceptance. – This may be a toughie for some of you. This means unconditional love and the ability to love someone for who they are and not what you want them to be. It means giving up how you think their life should go, and accepting them for what they want to do with their lives. This is the greatest gift that you can give to the people in your life.
  4. Your Attention. – How many of you really listen to the people in your life? For everyone who just said “of course I do,” then why are the people in your life asking you to repeat what they just said? It’s because they know that you didn’t hear them. Take a few minutes, stop what you are doing, and focus on the people who you love. Aren’t they worth it? And who knows, you may even learn something that you thought you already knew.
  5. Your Forgiveness. – Forgiving people for past mistakes and hurts is one of the greatest gifts you can give them. After all they are only human. Plus, I’m sure that you haven’t been the perfect human being either. Keeping hurt and anger in your life is just an excuse not to get close to people for fear that they will hurt you again.
  6. Your Patience. – How many of you can’t even be with the people you love because they are taking too long to tell a story or are taking longer that “you think” to complete a project that you think should take less time to get done. How do you know that there isn’t a better way to do something if the people around you always have to do it your way? Having patience with people shows them that they are respected and loved. Isn’t this a great gift to give for the holidays?
  7. Your Love. – People want to know that they are special in your life and that you care about them. If there are things that are keeping you from loving them such as conversations that you want to have with them, but you’re afraid, my advice is to say it. Sometimes you have to take a risk to achieve an open and rewarding relationship. Take the risk and give your love.
  8. Your Ideas. – Sometimes people want to move forward in their lives but they don’t know how. You may know something that they never thought of. And who knows, your ideas may change somebody’s life. So go ahead, don’t be afraid to share what you know.
  9. Your Smile. – here is nothing better that entering a room and seeing someone smile when you walk in. Right then and there you know that your presence makes a difference in their life. A smile is easy. You just grin upward. Plus, you burn many more calories than from frowning.
  10. A Hug. – Human touch warms the heart and keeps us connected. In addition, it doesn’t take much effort, it costs nothing, and it makes someone’s day. Couldn’t you find time in your schedule to hug someone you love today?

~~~

Show me someone who has done something worthwhile, and I’ll show you someone who has overcome adversity.

Lou Holtz

~~~

She said:

Any woman can have the body of a 21-year-old……..as long as she buys him a few drinks first.

My memory’s not as sharp as it used to be. Also, my memory’s not as sharp as it used to be.

Know how to prevent sagging? Just eat ’til the wrinkles fill out.

I’ve still got it, but nobody wants to see it.

I’m getting into swing dancing. Not on purpose Some parts of my body are just prone to swinging.

It’s scary when you start making the same noises as your coffeemaker.

I think I’ve reached my sexpiration date.

People our age can still enjoy an active passionate sex life! Provided we get that cable or dish thing.

The good news is, that even as we get older, guys still look at our boobs. The bad news is, they have to squat down first.

These days, about half the stuff in my shopping cart says, “For fast relief”.

I’ve tried to find a suitable exercise video for women my age, but they haven’t made one called “Buns of Putty”.

Don’t think of it as getting hot flashes. Think of it as your inner child playing with matches.

Don’t let aging get you down. It’s too hard to get back up.

Remember: you don’t stop laughing because you grow old, you grow old because you stop laughing.

~~~

Minds are like parachutes, they only function when open.

~~~

Late one Friday night, I was awakened by the ringing of my phone…In a sleepy grumpy voice I said, “Hello.”

The party on the other end of the line paused for a moment before rushing breathlessly into a lengthy speech.

“OK… Mom, this is Marsha and I’m sorry I woke you up, but I had to call because I’m going to be a little late getting home. See, Daddy’s car has a flat but it’s not my fault. Really! I don’t know what happened. The tire just went flat while John and I were inside the theater. Please don’t be mad, okay?”

Since I don’t have any daughters, I knew the person had misdialed. “I’m sorry dear, “I replied, “but you’ve reached the wrong number. I don’t have a daughter named Marsha.”

“Come on, Mom,” pleaded the young woman’s voice, “I didn’t think you’d be this mad.”

~~~

“If you haven’t got anything nice to say about anybody, come sit next to me.”

Alice Roosevelt Longworth

~~~

“I had the toughest time of my life. First, I got angina pectoris and then arteriosclerosis. Just as I was recovering from these, I got tuberculosis, double pneumonia and phthisis. Then they gave me hypodermics. Appendicitis was followed by tonsillectomy. These gave way to aphasia and hypertrophic cirrhosis. I completely lost my memory for a while. I know I had diabetes and acute ingestion, besides gastritis, rheumatism, lumbago and neuritis. I don’t know how I pulled through it. It was the hardest spelling test I’ve ever had.”

~~~

Laugh alone and the world thinks you’re an idiot.

~~~

A cat dies and goes to Heaven. God meets him at the gate and says, “You have been a good cat all of these years. Anything you desire is yours, all you have to do is ask.”

The cats says, “Well, I lived all my life with a poor family on a farm and had to sleep on hardwood floors.”

God says, “Say no more.” And instantly, a fluffy pillow appears.

A few days later, 6 mice are killed in a tragic accident and they go to Heaven. God meets them at the gate with the same offer that He made the cat. The mice said, “All our lives we’ve had to run. Cats, dogs and even women with brooms have chased us. If we could only have a pair of roller skates, we wouldn’t have to run anymore.”

God says, “Say no more.” And instantly, each mouse is fitted with a beautiful pair of tiny roller skates.

About a week later, God decides to check and see how the cat is doing. The cat is sound asleep on his new pillow. God gently wakes him and asks, “How are you doing? Are you happy here?”

The cat yawns and stretches and says, “Oh, I’ve never been happier in my life. And those Meals on Wheels you’ve been sending over are the best!”

~~~

A man can be as great as he wants to be. If you believe in yourself and have the courage, the determination, the dedication, the competitive drive and if you are willing to sacrifice the little things in life and pay the price for the things that are worthwhile, it can be done.

Vince Lombardi

~~~

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at http://rays-daily,com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

 

 

Let’s Loosen Up

Ray’s Daily

May 19, 2020

http://rays-daily.com

I realize that humor isn’t for everyone.

It’s only for people who want to have fun, enjoy life, and feel alive.

Anne Wilson Schaef

laugh

 

I have nothing special to offer today. So I would like to revisit happier times.

Ray’s Daily first published on May 19, 2005

~~~

Ain’t that the truth. I just realized that over the past few weeks I have gotten awfully solemn in the daily. After rereading some of the stuff I got to worrying that I might be taking myself too seriously. Fortunately, most of you know that my faults preclude any serious positioning. It’s like the guy said, it is too bad that you don’t think you are special, even though you are not.

That famous doctor, Dr. Seuss, once said, “From there to here, and here to there, funny things are everywhere.”  I am sure Dr. Seuss meant including ourselves.

Going through life always playing the part of someone else is not nearly as much fun as just letting go and being yourself. We should never take ourselves too seriously, if we do we will miss out on all the fun. One nice thing about doing something dumb or embarrassing, is that once we do it we no longer have to prove ourselves to others, they will already know we are human. If you are too perfect you may scare away people who find perfection either frightening or boring.

So drop everything, break a heel, lose a button, forget to zip up, and do something fun, outrageous, or just silly. When you do you can say to the world, “Damn you, I am not going to let you get me down, I am looking for the good times and you better not stand in my way.”

~~~

All animals, except man, know that the principal business of life is to enjoy it.

Samuel Butler

~~~

A wife says to her husband one weekend morning, “We’ve got such a clever dog. He brings in the daily newspapers every morning.”

Her husband replied, “Well, lots of dogs can do that.”

The wife responded, “But we’ve never subscribed to any papers!”

~~~

The only thing that men will brag about theirs being smaller than another man’s is his cell phone.

~~~

Over a pleasant evening meal Bill, John and Doug were discussing going to the gym and the various effects of working out.

Doug said that it was possible to get “pectoral inserts” for the “reasonable” cost of $6000.

Bill snickered, looked completely aghast and commented, “For $6000 you could get a personal trainer and get the same result without surgery.”

John replied, “For $6000 you could get a woman who doesn’t care what you look like.”

~~~

How about a constitutional amendment that declares anything said in a campaign speech to be under oath?

~~~

The Classifieds   If you see this describing a man, here’s what it really means:

40-ish – 52 and looking for 25-yr-old

Athletic – Sits on the couch and watches ESPN

Average looking – Unusual hair growth on ears, nose, and back

Educated – Will always treat you like an idiot

Free Spirit – Sleeps with your sister

Fun – Good with a remote and a six pack

Good looking – Arrogant

Honest – Pathological Liar

Huggable – Overweight, more body hair than a bear

Likes to cuddle – Insecure, overly dependent

Mature – Until you get to know him

Open-minded – Wants to sleep with your sister

Physically fit – I spend a lot of time in front of mirror admiring myself

Poet – Has written on a bathroom stall

Spiritual – Once went to church with his grandmother on Easter Sunday

Stable – Occasional stalker, but never arrested

Thoughtful – Says “please” when demanding a beer

~~~

The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.

Eleanor Roosevelt

~~~

Ken said:

A little boy got on the bus, sat next to a man reading a book, and noticed he had his collar on backwards.  The little boy asked why he wore his collar that way.

The man, who was a priest, said, “I am a Father”

The little boy replied, “My Daddy doesn’t wear his collar like that”.

The priest looked up from his book and answered, “I am the Father of many”.

The boy said, “My Dad has 4 boys, 4 girls and two grandchildren and he doesn’t wear his collar that way.

The priest, getting impatient, said, “I am the Father of hundreds” and went back to reading his book.

The little boy sat quietly thinking for a while, then leaned over and said, “Maybe you should wear your pants backwards instead of your collar”.

~~~

A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

~~~

There is a new virus. The code name is WORK. If you receive WORK from your colleagues, your boss, via e-mail, or from anyone else, do not touch it under any circumstances. This virus wipes out your private life completely.

If you should happen to come in contact with this virus, take two friends and go straight to the nearest bar. Order drinks immediately and after three rounds, you will find that WORK has been completely deleted from your system.

Forward this virus warning immediately to at least five friends. Should you realize you do not have five friends, this means you are already infected by this virus and WORK already controls your life.

If this is the case, go to the bar and stay until you make at least five friends. Then retry.

I think I have five friends, but am not entirely positive, so I’m headed for the bar anyway…it never hurts to be safe.

~~~

“Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.”

Woody Allen

~~~

Rifka and Beckie were talking about their children. Rifka asked Beckie how her daughter was.

“Not too good. My daughter just divorced her husband. He was a doctor.”

Rifka replied, “Oh, I am so sorry to hear that.”

Beckie continued, “Yes, it is sad. Her first husband, whom she divorced three years ago, was a dentist. But she is OK now, she is  dating a handsome lawyer.”

“A dentist, a doctor and a lawyer,” Rifka exclaimed,  “OY VEY! All these blessings from just one daughter!”

~~~

“Wherever you go, no matter what the weather, always bring your own sunshine.”

Anthony J. D’Angelo

~~~

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at http://rays-daily,com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

 

 

Thank You

Ray’s Daily

May 18, 2020

http://rays-daily.com

Love is blind; friendship closes its eyes.

Friedrich Nietzsche

friends

My oral surgery went well last Friday and the remaining teeth will be joined by a new bridge in a few weeks. I will then regain a reasonable smile. I want you to know I really appreciate all of your messages of support.

We are in unusual times with most of us isolated because of the virus. I am glad we can still communicate with each other for I have learned just how important staying in touch with friends and family really is. So my friends, thank you for being there, you do make a difference.

    A Friend…

Author Unknown

(A)ccepts you as you are

(B)elieves in “you”

(C)alls you just to say “HI”

(D)oesn’t give up on you

(E)nvisions the whole of you (even the unfinished parts)

(F)orgives your mistakes

(G)ives unconditionally

(H)elps you

(I)nvites you over

(J)ust “be” with you

(K)eeps you close at heart

(L)oves you for who you are

(M)akes a difference in your life

(N)ever Judges

(O)ffer support

(P)icks you up

(Q)uiets your fears

(R)aises your spirits

(S)ays nice things about you

(T)ells you the truth when you need to hear it

(U)nderstands you

(V)alues you

(W)alks beside you

(X)-plains thing you don’t understand

(Y)ells when you won’t listen and

(Z)aps you back to reality

~~~

Friends are those rare people who ask how we are and then wait to hear the answer.

Ed Cunningham

~~~

Moe and Lenny are strolling home from Shul one Saturday morning.

Suddenly a cab speeds past, and their friend, Irving, is running frantically behind it, flailing his arms wildly.

“Well,” said Lenny. “I never imagined our good friend Irving was a Sabbath violator! Look at him running for that taxi.”

“Wait a minute,” Moe replied. “Didn’t you read that book I lent you. ‘The Other Side of the Story,’ about the command to judge other people favorably? I’ll bet we can think of hundreds of excuses for Irving’s behavior.”

“Yeah, like what?”

“Maybe he’s sick and needs to go to the hospital.”

“Come on! He was running 60 miles an hour after that cab, he’s healthier than Arnold Schwartzennegger.”

“Well, maybe his wife’s having a baby.”

“She had one last week.”

“Well, maybe he needs to visit her in the hospital.”

“She’s home.”

“Well, maybe he’s running to the hospital to get a doctor.”

“He is a doctor.”

“Well, maybe he needs supplies from the hospital.”

“The hospital is a three minute walk in the opposite direction.”

“Well, maybe he forgot that it’s Shabbos!”

“Of course he knows it’s Shabbos. Didn’t you see his tie? It was his paisley beige l00% silk Giovanni tie from Italy. He never wears it during the week.”

“Wow, you’re really observant! I didn’t even notice he was wearing a tie.”

“How could you not notice? Didn’t you see how it was caught on the back fender of the taxi?”

~~~

“Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves for they shall never cease to be amused.”

~~~

A professor at the Michigan State University was known for giving boring, cliche-ridden lectures.

At the beginning of one semester, an innovative class breathed new life into the course by assigning baseball plays to each hackneyed phrase.

For example, when the professor said, “On the other hand,” that counted as a base hit. “By the same token” was a strike out; “and so on” counted as a stolen base. Divided into two teams by the center aisle of the lecture hall, the students played inning after inning of silent but vigorous baseball.

On the last day of class, the impossible happened: the score was tied and bases were loaded. Then the batter hit a home run! The winning team stood and cheered wildly.

Though deeply appreciative, the professor later was quoted as wondering why only half of the students had been enthusiastic about his lectures.

~~~

What you don’t see with your eyes, don’t invent with your mouth.

Jewish proverb

~~~

Jill complained to Nina, “Rosey told me that you told her the secret I told you not to tell her.”

“Well,” replied Nina in a hurt tone, “I told her not to tell you I told her.”

“Oh dear!” sighed Jill. “Well, don’t tell her I told you that she told me.”

~~~

Good breeding consists of concealing how much we think of ourselves and how little we think of the other person.

Mark Twain

~~~

Mildred, the church gossip, and self-appointed monitor of the church’s morals, kept sticking her nose into other people’s business. Several members did not approve of her extra-curricular activities, but feared her enough to maintain their silence.

She made a mistake, however, when she accused George, a new member, of being an alcoholic after she saw his old pickup parked in front of the town’s only bar one afternoon. She emphatically told George (and several others) that everyone seeing it there would know what he was doing.

George, a man of few words, stared at her for a moment and just turned and walked away. He didn’t explain, defend, or deny… He said nothing. Later that evening, George quietly parked his pickup in front of Mildred’s house… walked home… and left it there all night.

You got to love George!

~~~

The glory of friendship is not the outstretched hand, not the kindly smile, nor the joy of companionship; it is the spiritual inspiration that comes to one when you discover that someone else believes in you and is willing to trust you with a friendship.

Ralph Waldo Emerson

~~~

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at http://rays-daily,com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

 

 

Ray’s Big Day

Ray’s Daily

May 15, 2020

http://rays-daily.com

I do the very best I can to look upon life with optimism and hope and looking forward to a better day.    

Rosa Parks

tooth extraction

Some time ago I broke a permanent bridge that provided my upper front teeth which allowed easy eating and a reasonable appearance. I had broken one of the teeth that anchored the bridge, and the other anchor needed to be removed as well, Of course with the national shutdown the oral surgeons have been closed, but now they are open and we can get the removal done this morning.

I really look forward to one day getting my new bridge so I can easily eat again and smile with the current gap filled with new teeth. It is going to take a few weeks for my Dentist to make what I need but we are on the way, thank goodness.

Once I am whole again I need to make sure I don’t let my health slip. Here is an abridged article that provides a great plan for healthy living.

The Best Doctors

My best doctors are: Movement, Sleep, Moderation, Family/Friends, Stimulation and Attitude. Let me introduce you.

Movement. I prefer ‘movement’ to ‘exercise’ because it conjures up a different visual. With exercise I think of grunting, sweating and people in size 2 spandex. Movement, on the other hand, can be anything – walking, skipping, swinging your legs, waving hello or goodbye and millions of other everyday actions that gets our bodies going in one direction or another . . . all without a gym membership.

Sleep. While sleep requirements vary slightly from person to person, most healthy adults, including seniors, need between 7 to 9 hours of sleep per night to function at their best.

Moderation. ‘Everything in moderation’ was my grandmother’s motto whether it pertained to eating, sleeping or talking. She was ahead of her times. Today, researchers and scientist promote moderation as a principle of life reflecting that too much of a good thing is bad and too much of a bad thing is worse.

Family/Friends. Regardless of the highs and lows, family is an important element in our lives. Those who realize this early are very lucky. Those who come to this realization later are hopefully, blessed with good memories. Friends- these are the family of our heart. People we’ve chosen and, who have chosen us. They’re the forever constant of support, acceptance and a reality check. They love us enough to tell us we’re wrong and the first to defend us when others say we’re wrong.

Stimulation. What gets you going? What causes the light behind your eyes to shine brightly? What makes you smile, think and cheer? Whatever ‘stimulates’ you it should be fun, engaging, and interactive as well as helping you think, learn and understand.

Attitude. A positive attitude, or POSITUDE as my husband and I call it, is the best ‘doctor’ and one of the most important factors in getting you through the highs and lows of life. The best thing about attitude – you control it. You take the positive or negative ‘picture’ of situations you want to. Imagine, the ability to be happy lies within you. Now that’s power!

Written by Rosie Taylor

~~~

Every situation in life is temporary so, when life is good, make sure you enjoy and receive it fully. And when life isn’t so good, remember that it will not last forever and better days are on the way.

Jenni Young

~~~

She said: While I was visiting my sister one evening, I took out a candy dispenser that was shaped like a miniature person. “How does that thing work?” she asked.

As I turned the figurine’s arm to pop candy out, my sister laughed.  “I see it’s a lot like my husband,” she said.  “You have to twist his arm to get anything out of him.”

~~~

Middle-aged wife to husband at computer: “Yes, honey, I think you can safely assume that a romantic e-mail from Pamela Lee Anderson is a prank.”

~~~

Nathan is talking to his lawyer. “Here’s the deal, Abe. If you’re absolutely sure I’ll win the case, I’ll give you the business.”

“OK,” replies Abe, “but before I can give you my opinion, I obviously need to know the facts.”

So Nathan goes into great detail about his failed partnership and ends up saying, “So now you’ve heard everything, do you think I can sue my partner and get my money back?”

“Well,” replies Abe, “from what I’ve just heard, it’s clear to me that you will win. It’s rare to have such an open-and-shut case.”

Nathan goes very white when he hears this.

“What’s the matter?” asks Abe.

“I told you my partner’s side of the case,” replies Nathan.

~~~

“Whatever you’re ready for is ready for you.”

Mark Victor Hansen

~~~

He said: The computer company my wife works for distributed a corporate clothing catalogue that included a pair of cuff links. One was inscribed Ctrl (control) and the other Esc (escape), just as they look on a computer keyboard. “They would make a good present for any man,” my wife commented to a colleague, “if only to remind him of the two things he can never have.”

~~~

Treat each day as your last, one day you will be right.

~~~

At the urging of his doctor, John moved to Arizona.

After settling in, he met a neighbor who was also an older man.

“Say, is this really a healthy place?”

“It sure is,” the man replied.

“When I first arrived here I couldn’t say one word. I had hardly any hair on my head. I didn’t have the strength to walk across a room and I had to be lifted out of bed.”

“That’s wonderful!” said John. “How long have you been here?”

“I was born here.”

~~~

Have faith in tomorrow, for it can bring better days. Never wish for yesterday, for it has gone its separate ways. Believe in today, for it’s what you’re living now.

Tonya K. Grant

~~~

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at http://rays-daily,com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

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