Ray's musings and humor

Archive for December, 2013

We are a planning a big New Year’s Eve clelbration

“Hope Smiles from the threshold of the year to come, Whispering ‘it will be happier’…”

Alfred Tennyson

happy_new_year

Well here we are, the last day of 2013. In not too many hours we begin again. While I do have plans to make this next year as good as I can I only have one wish and that is that 2014 is one of the best years for us both.

I don’t know about you but I have a full day today. First I will spend an hour or two with my rehab trainer as I work my way back to normal health. Then after a few errands I will await the delivery of a new stove that will replace old faithful that gave its last gasps last week. The new one is an electronic, convection and do it all magic device at least that is what the sales lady told us.

And then of course we will participate in a traditional New Year’s Eve celebration. Ours will begin with a 9 PM (ST – senior time) dinner with close friends followed by a midnight celebration and then back home for a good night’s sleep. We will set our watches ahead four hours before we leave home so we are on senior time. Of course when we eat dinner everyone else will think it is five PM but we’ll be happy and we will celebrate midnight on both London time and senior time. Instead of a ball falling in Time’s Square we will be limited to a roll we mistakenly drop on the floor at the restaurant.

 

A New Year poem

“What can be said in New Year rhymes,

That’s not been said a thousand times?

The new years come, the old years go,

We know we dream, we dream we know.

We rise up laughing with the light,

We lie down weeping with the night.

We hug the world until it stings,

We curse it then and sigh for wings.

We live, we love, we woo, we wed,

We wreathe our prides, we sheet our dead.

We laugh, we weep, we hope, we fear,

And that’s the burden of a year.”

Ella Wheeler Wilcox

~~~

“Let this coming year be better than all the others. Vow to do some of the things you have always wanted to do but could not find the time. Call up a forgotten friend. Drop an old grudge, and replace it with some pleasant memories. Vow not to make a promise you do not think you can keep. Walk tall, and smile more. You will look 10 years younger. Do not be afraid to say, I love you. Say it again. They are the sweetest words in the world.”

Ann Landers

~~~

Are you sick of making the same resolutions year after year that you never keep? Why not promise to do something you can actually accomplish? Here are some resolutions that you can use as a starting point:

Gain weight. At least 30 pounds.

Stop exercising. Waste of time.

Read less. Makes you think.

Watch more TV. I’ve been missing some good stuff.

Procrastinate more. Starting tomorrow.

Don’t date any of the Baywatch cast.

Start being superstitious.

~~~

A Jewish Prayer for the New Year

May we get a clean bill of health from our dentist, our psychiatrist, our ophthalmologist, our cardiologist, our gastroenterologist, our urologist, our proctologist, our gynecologist, our podiatrist, our plumber and the IRS.

May our hair, our teeth, our facelift, our abs, our honey cakes, and our stocks not fall and may our blood pressure, our triglycerides, our cholesterol, our white blood count, our weight and our mortgage interest rates not rise.

May we find a way to travel from anywhere to anywhere in the rush hour in less than an hour and when we get there, may we find a parking space.

May we be awestruck by God’s sense of humor as we realize that a professional wrestler could have become president of the United States and that an Orthodox Jew has risen to prominence in American politics while remaining true to his Jewish roots. It is my belief that God’s joyous humor is the reason he really does not want us to touch our toes while exercising or he would have put them further up our bodies; and, the reason so many of us take up jogging is to hear heavy breathing again.

May what we see in the mirror delight us and what others see in us, delight them. May someone, as well as God, love us enough to forgive our faults, be blind to our blemishes and tell the world about our virtues.

May the telemarketers wait until after we finish dinner to call us. May our checkbooks and budgets balance and may they include generous amounts for charity.

May we remember to say “I love you” at least once a day to our spouse, our child, our parent, all of our significant others but not our boss, our intern, our nurse, our masseur, our hairdresser or our tennis instructor.

And may the Messiah come this year, and if he does not, may we live as if he has, in a world at peace, with awareness of God’s love in every sunset, flower, baby’s smile, lover’s kiss, and every wonderful astonishing beat of our heart. May we smile and laugh throughout the year.

~~~

‘Twas the month after Christmas, and all through the house

Not a garment would fit me, not even a blouse.

The cookies I’d nibble, the eggnog I’d taste

At those holiday parties went straight to my waist.

When I got on the scales there arose such a number!

I walked to the store (less a walk than a lumber)

And thought of the marvelous meals I’d prepared;

The gravies and sauces and beef nicely rared,

The wine and the rum balls, the bread and the cheese

And the way that I’d never said, “No thank you, please.”

When I put on my extra-large husband’s old shirt

And prepared once again to do batle with dirt–

I said to myself, as only I can,

“You can’t spend the winter disguised as a man!”

So–away with the last of the sour cream dip!

Go, fruitcake! Go, cookies! Go, cracker and chip!

Each last bit of food that I like must be banished

‘Till all the additional ounces have vanished.

I won’t have that ice cream, not even a lick;

I’ll chew only on a long celery stick.

I won’t have hot biscuits, or cornbread, or pie;

I’ll munch on a carrot and quietly cry.

I’m hungry, I’m lonesome, and life is a bore–

But isn’t that what January is for?

Unable to giggle, no longer a riot,

Happy New Year to all and to all a good diet!

~~~

Let the brand New Year discovers you fresher, happier, healthier, more joyful, more cheerful and more satisfied.

Here is wishing you a Happy New Year.

Ray

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

This daily is sent only to special people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are about 2000 readers from around the world.

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Have you made a plan?

“How few there are who have courage enough to own their faults, or resolution enough to mend them”

Benjamin Franklin

 Accomplish-Your-New-Year's-Resolutions

In three more days it will be 2014. 2013 has been a mixed bag for me, a lot of good things with a lot of health difficulties thrown in. I plan on doing what I can to make sure that 2014 is a healthy year. I, like so many others take stock at the end of one year and set some objectives for the next. Unfortunately over the years my resolutions soon faded from memory and I fell back into my traditional bad habits.

Someone said recently that he did not make resolutions he made plans, and while I have done better lately the stakes are higher this year so I too will make measurable plans.

I decided I would look to see if I could find some helpful hints and I found these in an article by Dana Dratch that you might find of use as well. I have edited the article due to space limits.

 

9 ways to keep your New Year’s resolutions

1. Make it something you really want. Don’t make it a resolution that you “should” want or what other people tell you to want. It has to fit with your own values.

2. Limit your list to a number you can handle. “It’s probably best to make two or three resolutions that you intend to keep,” says O’Connor. That way, you’re focusing your efforts on the goals you truly want.

3. Be specific. “To be effective, resolutions and goals need to be pretty specific,” says O’Connor. Jettison the amorphous “exercise more,” in favor of “I’m working out at the gym Monday, Wednesday and Friday at 5:30 p.m.”

4. Automate. Automating financial goals can maximize your odds for success without you having to do anything, says Keith Ernst, director of research for the Center for Responsible Lending in Durham, N.C. If your goal is to save $3,000 this year, calculate the amount out of each check, then arrange to have it automatically deposited into your savings account each time you get paid, says Ernst.

5. Make a plan. Rather than stating one daunting goal, create a series of smaller steps to reach it. “Have an action plan,” O’Connor says. “Figure out exactly what you want to do.”

6. Be prepared to change some habits. One reason that resolutions fail is people don’t change the habits that sabotage them, says Rosalene Glickman. One potent approach is to realize that all you ever have is the present moment. So ask what you can do now that will get you closer to your goal, says Glickman.

7. Write down the goal and visualize it regularly. Writing and visualizing are effective tools for fulfilling a goal because they fix it firmly in the subconscious. And if you write down your goals, put them in a prominent place where you’ll view them frequently, such as on the fridge or on your desk.

8. To tell or not to tell? Having someone hold you accountable can be a powerful tool. “In general, making a public commitment adds motivation,” O’Connor says. Skip the naysayers, but if you have one or two people in your life who will act as cheerleaders or coaches, share the goal with them.

9. Forgive yourself. If you fall off the wagon, jump back on. Many people fall into the trap of believing that if they stumble, they should give up, says O’Connor. The truth is you don’t have to wait for next year or for some magic moment. Instead, realize that “slipping is part of the process,” O’Connor says. Then, get back to your goals.

~~~

The changes in our life must come from the impossibility to live otherwise than according to the demands of our conscience not from our mental resolution to try a new form of life.

Leo Tolstoy

~~~

Remember the kids, they taught us:

Never tell your little brother that you’re not going to do what your mom told you to do.

—Hank, Age 12

Listen to your brain. It has lots of information.

— Chelsey, Age 7

Never dare your little brother to paint the family car.

—Philip, Age 13

~~~

Life is only as long as you live it.

~~~

“So,” Jane asked the detective she had hired. “Did you trail my husband?”

“Yes ma’am. I did. I followed him to a bar, to an out-of-the-way restaurant and then to an apartment.”

A big smile crossed Jane’s face. “Aha! I’ve got him!” she said gloating. “Is there any doubt what he was doing?”

“No ma’am.” replied the sleuth, “It’s pretty clear that he was following you.”

~~~

An oral contract isn’t worth the paper it’s written on.

~~~

There once was a 94-year-old nun in the 1890’s whose worn-out body began to surrender. Her doctor prescribed for her a shot of whiskey three times a day, to relax her. However, not to be lured into worldly pleasures, she huffily declined. But her mother superior knew the elderly sister loved milk. So she instructed the kitchen to spike the milk three times a day.

Eventually, the elderly pious one approached her final hour. As several sisters gathered around her at bedside, the mother superior asked if she wanted to leave them any words of wisdom.

“Oh, yes,” she replied. “Never sell that cow!”

~~~

Recession: A period when you go without things your grandparents never heard of.

~~~

A saleswoman is driving toward home in northern Arizona when she sees an elderly American Indian woman walking on the side of the road. As the trip had been long and quiet, she stops the car and the Indian woman gets in.

After a bit of small talk, the Indian woman notices a brown bag on the front seat. “What’s in the bag?” she asks.

“It’s a bottle of wine. I got it for my husband,” says the saleswoman.

The Indian woman is silent for a moment, then says, “Good trade.”

~~~

He who would go a hundred miles should consider ninety-nine as halfway.

Japanese proverb

~~~

Master Sergeant Alfie was a thirty-year Army veteran now assigned to a training battalion and tough as nails. He seemed to have no thought whatsoever about how others responded to his cut-and-dried military manner.

One day he assembled the training battalion and announced, “Private Monroe, take one step forward.” Private Monroe took one step forward, and the sergeant bellowed, “Private Monroe. Report to the chaplain; your mother just died.” Monroe just crumbled and fainted dead away from shock.

Later that day, the battalion commander chewed out the master sergeant: “You’re going to have to learn something about TACT. You just can’t yell at a man and tell him his mother just died. The next time you’re called on for this duty, you’d better do it in a more compassionate way.”

It just so happened that the very next day, another soldier’s mother died, and the MSGT assembled the troops again. “All you whose mother is living” he shouted, “take one step forward. NOT SO FAST, TAYLOR!”

~~~

“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.”

Theodore Roosevelt

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

This daily is sent only to special people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are about 2000 readers from around the world.

Yes I will

He conquers who endures.

Persius

I will do it

I am off to see my heart doctor this morning to check on the progress I am making on the road to good health. I am getting better every day as I work to rebuild my stamina. I am finding as I exercise for even a modest amount of time fatigue starts to set in and even a normal day seems too long. I know it will take more time, some patience and a lot of discipline to reach my goal. My plan is to restart going to the gym on days I am not in rehab and then sustain a productive exercise program.

My trainers are telling me that my progress have been so good that I will probably be released from rehab in the not too distant future and then it will all be up to me. I know I will need to discipline myself into making sure I keep up a “no excuse” routine while avoiding falling into the “not today” trap. So it will mean going back to 5 AM workouts as I work my way back to the full set of exercises I had before my heart failure. I am led to believe that what I did before provided me what I needed to survive from some pretty grave events. So now I have to reprove myself and demonstrate that I have the will to invest in a healthy future.

OK, I’ll admit it; it is not all that easy so I think I am going to keep the following poem handy to help keep me on track.

 

Don’t Quit!

When things go wrong, as they sometimes will,

when the road you’re trudging seems all uphill,

When the funds are low and the debts are high,

And you want to smile, but you have to sigh,

When care is pressing you down a bit,

Rest, if you must, but do not quit.

 

Life is queer with its twists and turns,

As every one of us sometimes learns,

And many a failure turns about,

When he might have won had he stuck it out;

Don’t give up though the pace seems slow—

You may succeed with another blow.

 

Often the goal is nearer than,

It seems to a faint and faltering man,

Often the struggler has given up,

When he might have captured the victor’s cup,

And he learned too late when the night slipped down,

How close he was to the golden crown.

 

Success is failure turned inside out—

The silver tint of the clouds of doubt,

And you never can tell how close you are,

It may be near when it seems so far,

So stick to the fight when you’re hardest hit—

It’s when things seem worst that you must not quit.

Author Unknown

~~~

“Courage doesn’t always roar. Sometimes courage is the little voice at the end of the day that says I’ll try again tomorrow.”

Mary Anne Radmacher

~~~

Abby rejected these letters, I wonder why.

Dear Abby,

Our son writes that he is taking Judo. Why would a boy who was raised in a good Christian home turn against his own?

Dear Abby,

I was married to Bill for three months and I didn’t know he drank until one night he came home sober.

Dear Abby,

You told some woman whose husband had lost all interest in sex to send him to a doctor. Well, my husband lost all interest in sex years ago and he is a doctor.

~~~

The shortest distance between two points is how far apart they are.

~~~

Earthquakes can strike without warning, and being prepared for such a disaster can mean the difference between life and death. Here are some tips to help you and your loved ones make it through a quake:

~ Those living in areas not prone to earthquakes can respond quickly to the plight of disaster victims in quake zones by complacently smirking and saying, “I told you so.”

~ To minimize loss and damage in a quake, try not to own things.

~ Practice your burrowing-out-from-under-40-tons-of-rubble skills ahead of time.

~ Look out your window often. If you see a large, zigzag-shaped crevasse moving rapidly from the horizon toward your home, step either to the right or the left.

~ A doorway is the safest place to be during a quake. Eat, sleep, and work in doorways.

~ Be sure to mail your house-insurance payments a full five business days before a major earthquake strikes.

~~~

Even if you are on the right track, you’ll get run over if you just sit there.

Will Rogers

~~~

A man entered a stationery store and asked the clerk for a birthday/anniversary card.

The clerk replied, “We have birthday cards and we have anniversary cards. Why not take one of each?”

The man said, “You don’t understand. I need a card that covers BOTH events! You see, we’re celebrating the fifth anniversary of my wife’s thirty-fourth birthday…”

~~~

“Continuous effort – not strength or intelligence – is the key to unlocking our potential.”

Winston Churchill

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

This daily is sent only to special people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are about 2000 readers from around the world.

The days ahead look good

It’s not what you look at that matters, it’s what you see.

Henry David Thoreau

 what matters

Here we are the day after Christmas and soon we will bid farewell to 2013. It has been a heck of a year with many highlights especially the accomplishments of so many of you, my friends and family. It also has had its challenges as I had three unrelated surgeries and an extended hospital stay due to my heart failure and pneumonia. Fortunately my mind does not dwell on the pain and distress accompanying my medical adventures rather it lingers on the good people I met and the new friends I made. 2013 has also been a year of personal adjustment as I have tweaked my activities to more realistically stay within my capacity to perform.

While I have not made any 2014 resolutions I am committed to a healthier lifestyle. The 20 some pounds I have lost have been great and I need to work to keep from gaining them back. I have again learned that healthy diets include tasty foods and tjat the potato chip and snack industry will survive without my business. My current physical rehab program has identified some physical areas that I can work on in the months ahead as I return to my daily workout regimen at the YMCA.

Here a few thoughts I picked up from author Marc Chernoff that I think will help. He wrote:

 

Do you need help focusing on what matters most?

Real happiness and success comes from the quality of your attitude, your relationships, and the emotions you experience each day.  That’s where the questions below come in. 

What is the most important thing I can do today for my own well-being?

If you don’t take good care of yourself, then you can’t take good care of others either; which is why taking care of yourself is the best selfish thing you can do.

Every new day is a chance to change your life.  Work on making life all that you want it to be.  Work hard for what you believe, and keep your dreams big and your worries small.  Figure out how you can best serve yourself today.

Remember, you never need to carry more than you can hold, just take one small step at a time.  And while you’re out there today making decisions instead of excuses, learning new things, and getting closer and closer to your goals, know that there are others out there, like me, who admire your efforts and are striving for greatness too.

What can I do to make a positive difference in the lives around me?

Being a genuinely good person, helping others, and leaving the world better than you found it is what a truly rich life is.  Knowing deep down that you counted – that someone else’s life would not have been as well off without you in it – that’s priceless.  That’s something worth working for.

There are many small, simple actions you can make to profoundly impact your family, your community, and the world.   So do your best to leave everything you touch today a little better than you found it.

What do I appreciate about my life right now?

As Socrates once said, “Contentment is natural wealth, luxury is artificial poverty.”

Do not waste all your happiness by overlooking everything you have for everything you wish you had.  If you do, you will never have enough.  Instead, appreciate the goodness that is already yours, and you will instantly find a lot more to smile about.

Appreciate the good people and things around you, and you’ll soon find many more of them around you.  Truly appreciate your life, and you’ll find that you have more of it to live.

~~~

What matters is to live in the present, live now, for every moment is now. It is your thoughts and acts of the moment that create your future. The outline of your future path already exists, for you created its pattern by your past.

Sai Baba

~~~

The church was celebrating Communion.  During the “children’s sermon,” the minister was talking about Communion and what it is all about.  “The Bible talks of Holy Communion being a ‘joyful feast’.  What does that mean? Well, ‘joyful’ means happy, right?  And a feast is a meal.  So a ‘joyful feast’ is a happy meal.  And what are the three things we need for a happy meal?”

Little Johnny put up his hand and said, “Hamburger, fries, and a regular soft drink?”

~~~

“The secret of success is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake those, you’ve got it made.”

Groucho Marx

~~~

The newlyweds entered the elevator of their Miami Beach hotel. The operator, a magnificent blonde, looked at them in surprise and said, “Why, hello, Teddy, how are you?”

A frosty silence prevailed until the couple reached their room, when the piqued bride demanded: “Who was that woman?!”

“Take it easy, honey,” said the groom, “I’m going to have trouble enough explaining you to her.”

~~~

It used to be only death and taxes were inevitable. Now, of course, there’s shipping and handling, too.

~~~

At a wedding rehearsal, the minister told the father of the bride, “As you give your daughter’s hand to the bridegroom, you should say something nice to him.”

The father, a grocery store manager, took the advice.  During the wedding ceremony, he placed the bride’s hand on his son-in-law’s arm and said, “No deposit, no return.”

~~~

“I told my psychiatrist that everyone hates me. He said I was being ridiculous – everyone hasn’t met me yet.”

Rodney Dangerfield.

~~~

Wouldn’t be great if:

…a person would feel as good at 50 as he did at 17, and he would actually be as smart at 50 as he thought he was at 17.

…doing what was good for you would be what you enjoyed doing the most.

…pro baseball players would complain about teachers being paid contracts worth millions of dollars.

…people would always have good reasons to be optimistic.

…the mail would always be early, the check would always be in the mail, and it would be written for more than you expected.

…first impressions wouldn’t count for nearly as much as ultimate performance.

…the better food tasted, the less calories it would have.

…warranties would be for 13 months and products would fail at 12.

~~~

You can’t turn back the clock, but you can wind it up again.

~~~

The Smith’s were proud of their family tradition.  Their ancestors had come to America on the Mayflower.  Their line had included Senators and Wall Street wizards. Now they decided to compile a family history, a legacy for the children.  They hired a fine author.  Only one problem arose — how to handle that great-uncle who was executed in the electric chair. The author said he could handle that chapter of history tactfully.

The book appeared.  It said that “Great-uncle George occupied a chair of applied electronics at an important government institution, was attached to his position by the strongest of ties and his death came as a real shock.”

~~~

Life’s like a play: it’s not the length, but the excellence of the acting that matters.

Lucius Annaeus Seneca

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

This daily is sent only to special people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are about 2000 readers from around the world.

I wish you all peace and happiness

Christmas Eve – Peace to all

 christmas-eve2

Here we are on the eve of Christmas. This year we will have to adjust to the breaking of a number of family traditions. We have been going out to dinner with special family friends on Christmas Eve for forty years or so, but not this year since my energy wanes too early these days to be good company. I am rapidly recovering but not to the point that I want be of concern to friends. This will also be the first time in more than 50 years that we will not be spending Christmas Day with all of our Children and Grandchildren as my son and his family will be basking in the sun in Hawaii. Like many others we must adjust to the real world and use Christmas day to recall fond memories and enjoy what we do have. In that vein I decided to bring back Christmas from ten years ago by reprinting Ray’s Daily from 2003. Here is what the world looked like to me on that day.

 

Ray’s Daily Christmas Eve 2003

 

Christmas Greeting From A Fairy To A Child

by Lewis Carroll

 

Lady, dear, if Fairies may

For a moment lay aside

Cunning tricks and elfish play,

‘Tis at happy Christmas-tide.

We have heard the children say –

Gentle children, whom we love –

Long ago on Christmas Day,

Came a message from above,

Still, as Christmas-tide comes round,

They remember it again –

Echo still the joyful sound

“Peace on earth, good-will to men!”

Yet the hearts must childlike be

Where such heavenly guests abide;

Unto children, in their glee,

All the year is Christmas-tide!

Thus, forgetting tricks and play

For a moment, Lady dear,

We would wish you, if we may,

Merry Christmas, Glad New Year!

~~~

No matter where you are in the world today, no matter your religion or your beliefs, I hope you too will embrace “Peace on Earth, good-will to men.” I know of no time when goodwill was needed more. The events of the last few years have shown that hatred, animosity, and terror affects us all, and that no one is guaranteed safety and tranquility. It will take us all, and millions of others working for peace and understanding if we are to stop and reverse the insanity. At the very least we can be kind to each other and invest in the brightest possible future for all children in the years ahead. During this season of celebration let us not forget the fact that our religions and our philosophy is based on the promise of a better life for all.

I hope each of you have the happiest of holidays, hopefully with those you love and care for.

Ray

~~~

I wish you all peace, joy, and the brightest of futures.

~~~

As a little girl climbed onto Santa’s lap, Santa asked the usual, “And what would you like for Christmas?”

The child stared at him open mouthed and horrified for a minute, then gasped: “Didn’t you get my E-mail?”

~~~

Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit my best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low stress, non-addictive, gender neutral, celebration of the winter solstice holiday(tm), practiced within the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasion of your choice, or secular practices of your choice, with respect for the religious/secular persuasions and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all . . . and a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling, and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2004, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped make America great, (not to imply that America is necessarily greater than any other country or is the only “AMERICA” in the western hemisphere), and without regard to the race, creed, color, age, physical ability, religious faith, choice of computer platform, or sexual orientation of the wishee.

By accepting this greeting, you are accepting these terms: This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal. It is freely transferable with no alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for her/himself or others, and is void where prohibited by law, and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher. This wish is warranted to perform as expected within the usual application of good tidings for a period of one year, or until the issuance of a subsequent holiday greeting, whichever comes first, and warranty is limited to replacement of this wish or issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wisher.

~~~

All I Need To Know I Learned From Santa

1. Encourage people to believe in you.

2. Always remember who’s naughty and who’s nice.

3. Don’t pout.

4. It’s as much fun to give as it is to receive.

5. Some days it’s ok to feel a little chubby.

6. Make your presents known.

7. Always ask for a little bit more than what you really want.

8. Bright red can make anyone look good.

9. Wear a wide belt and no-one will notice how many pounds you’ve gained.

10. If you only show up once a year, everyone  will think you’re very important.

11. Whenever you’re at a loss for words, say “HO, HO, HO!”

~~~

Until one feels the spirit of Christmas, there is no Christmas. All else is outward display–so much tinsel and decorations. For it isn’t the holly, it isn’t the snow. It isn’t the tree not the firelight’s glow. It’s the warmth that comes to the hearts of men when the Christmas spirit returns again.

Unknown

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

This daily is sent only to special people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are about 2000 readers from around the world.

Thank you for all you do

“Let us be grateful to people who make us happy; they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom.”

Marcel Proust

 Grateful

One of the great benefits of the holiday season for many of us is taking time to look back on our lives and recognize the truly good things that have happened to us. In my case one of the highlights has been looking back just a few weeks and recognizing that if it were not for a number of caring medical people I might not be with you today. As I scan the years there are so many events and people that have contributed to my well being that there is no way I could express gratitude to them all.

As an example I owe a lot to a friend who helped me see I should retire in 1990. I did not think I could but he helped me see that it was the right thing to do. These last 23 years have been the best in my lifetime and that is due in no small part to my friend Denny, I wish he was here so I could again thank him but unfortunately he passed away earlier this week.

Please share your gratitude with the people who contribute to your wellbeing, it is one of the best presents you can give. Here are some ideas you can use to express your gratitude they taken from Ways to Show Gratitude for the People in Your Life written by  Lori Deschene

 

Show Gratitude to People Who Love You

  • Share a specific example of something they did for you and how it made a difference in your life.
  • Give a long, intimate hug; or if you know they don’t like hugs, stick out your hand for a handshake to cater to their preferences and make them smile.
  • Give them something of yours that you think they would enjoy, and let them know specifically why you want them to have it.
  • Invite them to do something you know they’ve always wanted to do.
  • Encourage them to try something you know they want to try, but haven’t yet because they’re scared.
  • Compliment them on a talent, skill, or strength that you admire.
  • Look them straight in the eyes and say, “You make the world a better place.”

Show Gratitude to People Who Serve You

  • Give a larger tip than usual.
  • If they have a tip jar, include a thoughtful note of appreciation along with your coins or bills.
  • Smile when you order or enlist their assistance. Smiles are contagious, so give one away!
  • Let their superior know they do an outstanding job.
  • If you have their contact information, send an email of appreciation—and let them know you just wanted to express your gratitude, so they don’t need to write back.
  • Praise them in a review on Yelp and/or recommend them to people you know.

Show Gratitude to People Who Work with You

  • Write a hand-written thank you note, acknowledging things you value about them and their work.
  • Bring back lunch for them if you know they’re working hard and likely haven’t had a chance to grab something.
  • Ask them about their lives instead of always being all business. This doesn’t mean you need to pry into personal matters; it just means showing an interest in who they are as people.
  • Listen fully if they’re having a difficult day, and recognize if they need space to figure things out on their own, not advice or help.
  • Remember the little things can make a big difference!

~~~

At times our own light goes out and is rekindled by a spark from another person. Each of us has cause to think with deep gratitude of those who have lighted the flame within us.

Albert Schweitzer

~~~

A British clergyman struggled along with a small congregation in a small neighborhood. A commercial firm offered to supply free hymn books, provided they could insert a bit of discreet advertising into the hymnals. The pastor was reluctant but finally agreed. When the hymnals arrived, he eagerly examined them and was delighted to find no brash advertisements on or inside the covers. The next Sunday, his flock began to sing from the hymnals. All went well until the third song, in which the congregation lifted their voices in unison to the melodious notes of:

 

Hark the herald angels sing,

Hanson’s pills are just the thing;

Peace on earth and mercy mild,

Two for men and one for child.

~~~

Today everyone wants instant gratification, no matter how long it takes.

~~~

The Wednesday-night church service coincided with the last day of hunting season.

Or pastor asked who had bagged a deer.  No one raised a hand.

Puzzled, the pastor said, “I don’t get it.  Last Sunday many of you said you were missing because of hunting season.  I had the whole congregation pray for your deer.”

One hunter groaned, “Well, it worked.  They’re all safe.”

~~~

A friend is someone who knows the song in your heart and can sing it back to you when you have forgotten the words.

~~~

In a stationery store, I quickly picked out a card for my wife for our anniversary.  The clerk was surprised by how little time it took me, and she began relating a story about another customer who spent a half-hour searching for the right anniversary greeting.

Noticing the man lingering over one card after another, the clerk went to see if she could help.  “Is there a problem?” she asked.

“Yes, there is,” he replied ruefully.  “I can’t find one my wife will believe.”

~~~

Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don’t.

~~~

Bobby and Ralph were walking home from Sunday School, each deep in his own thoughts. Finally Ralph said, “What do you think about all this devil stuff we studied today?”

Bobby replied thoughtfully, “Well, you know how Santa Claus turned out. This is probably just your Dad, too…”

~~~

If you concentrate on finding whatever is good in every situation, you will discover that your life will suddenly be filled with gratitude, a feeling that nurtures the soul.

Rabbi Harold Kushner

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

This daily is sent only to special people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are about 2000 readers from around the world.

Time for happiness

This season, may you be blessed with laughter, peace, and love.

enjoy the season

Yesterday was my first real day out I drove to a Kiwanis meeting, lunched with one of my grandsons and met with my pulmonologist who said my recovery was progressing well but it was still going to take weeks before I am fully back. All I can say was I was pooped when the day ended and this morning I am off to another rehab session. Since I am moving a little slow let’s see what I wrote on this day eleven years ago.

Ray’s Daily first published December 20, 2002

The weather in Indianapolis will change for the worse today; it always does whenever I ring bells outside for the Salvation Army. The side benefit though is that people seem to be more giving out of sympathy for runny noses, frozen feet, and shivering.

~~~

The truly generous is the truly wise, and he who loves not others, lives unblest.

Henry Home

~~~

Continuing the current trend of large-scale mergers and acquisitions, it was announced today at a press conference that Christmas and Hanukkah will merge. An industry source said that the deal had been in the works about 1300 years. While details were not available at press time, it is believed that the overhead cost of having twelve days of Christmas and eight days of Hanukkah was becoming prohibitive for both sides. By combining forces, we’re told, the world will be able to enjoy consistently high-quality service during the Fifteen Days of Chrismukah, as the new holiday is being called.

Massive layoffs are expected, with lords a-leaping and maids a-milking being the hardest hit. As part of the conditions of the agreement, the letters on the dreidel, currently in Hebrew, will be replaced by Latin, thus becoming unintelligible to a wider audience.

Also, instead of translating to “A great miracle happened there,” the message on the dreidel will be the more generic: “Miraculous stuff happens.” In exchange, it is believed that Jews will be allowed to use Santa Claus and his vast merchandising resources for buying and delivering their gifts.

One of the sticking points holding up the agreement for at least three hundred years was the question of whether Jewish children could leave milk and cookies for Santa even after having eaten meat for dinner. A breakthrough came last year, when Oreos were finally declared to be Kosher. All sides appeared happy about this.

Fortunately for all concerned, he said, Kwanzaa will help to maintain the competitive balance. He then closed the press conference by leading all present in a rousing rendition of “Oy Vey, All Ye Faithful.”

~~~

Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer but wish we didn’t.

Erica Jong

~~~

To: All Employees

From: Management

Subject: Office conduct during the Christmas season

Effective immediately, employees should keep in mind the following guidelines in compliance with FROLIC (the Federal Revelry Office and Leisure Industry Council).

1. Running aluminum foil through the paper shredder to make tinsel is discouraged.

2. Playing Jingle Bells on the push-button phone is forbidden.  (It runs up an incredible long distance bill.)

3. Egg nog will NOT be dispensed in vending machines.

4. Company cars are not to be used to go over the river and through the woods to Grandma’s house.

5. All fruitcake is to be eaten BEFORE July 25.

6. Work requests are not to be filed under “Bah humbug.”

In spite of all this, the staff is encouraged to have a Happy Holiday.

~~~

Don’t worry that children never listen to you. Worry that they are always watching you.

Robert Fulghum

~~~

It’s forty below zero one-winter night in Alaska. Pat is drinking at his local saloon and the bartender says to him, “You owe me quite a bit on your tab.”

“Sorry,” says Pat, “I’m flat broke this week.”

“That’s okay,” says the bartender. “I’ll just write your name and the amount you owe me right here on the wall.”

“But,” says Pat, “I don’t want any of my friends to see that.”

“They won’t,” says the bartender. “I’ll just hang your parka over it until it’s paid.”

~~~

If George Washington were alive today, he’d be most noted for his old age.

~~~

Bill had just reached the airport in the nick of time to catch the plane for their two-week’s vacation in France.

“I wish we’d brought the refrigerator with us,” said Morris.

“What on earth for?” asked the wife.

“I’ve left our airline tickets on it.”

~~~

My inferiority complex is not as good as yours.

~~~

A guy walks into a shoe store and asks for a pair of shoes, size 8. The obviously well trained salesman says, “But sir, you take an 11 or eleven-and-a-half.”

“Just bring me a size eight.”

The sales guy brings them and the man stuffs his feet into them and stands up in obvious pain.  He turns to the salesman and says, “I’ve lost my house to the I.R.S., I live with my mother-in-law, my daughter ran off with my best friend, and my business has filed Chapter 7.

The only pleasure I have left is to come home at night and take my shoes off.”

~~~

“A worrier always seems less troubled by what happens today than by what might happen tomorrow.”

Unknown

~~~

One fine day, Jim and Bob are out golfing. Jim slices his ball deep into a wooded ravine. He grabs his 8-iron and proceeds down the embankment into the ravine in search of his ball.

The brush is quite thick, but Jim searches diligently and suddenly he spots something shiny. As he gets closer, he realizes that the shiny object is in fact an 8-iron in the hands of a skeleton lying near an old golf ball.

Jim excitedly calls out to his golfing partner: “Hey Bob, come here, I got trouble down here.”

Bob comes running over to the edge of the ravine and calls out: “What’s the matter Jim?”

Jim shouts back in a nervous voice: “Throw me my 7-iron! You can’t get out of here with an 8-iron.”

~~~

“Happiness is not a reward – it is a consequence. Suffering is not a punishment – it is a result.”

Robert G. Ingersoll

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

This daily is sent only to special people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are about 2000 readers from around the world.

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