Problems are not the problem; coping is the problem.
Do you ever feel like you are overloaded? I often have and find I no longer can the handle the loads I once did. I am doing better in matching my commitments with my likes and capabilities having learned not to get too stressed by what I am not doing or won’t do.
That’s not to say that there are mot some no choice mandatory things in my life and sometimes when combined other activities they start to tip the scale into the overload range. I have made peace with the fact I sometimes can’t do it all so I just do what I can.
Here is an edited article written by Henrik Edberg of the Positivity Blog that includes tips that have helped my cope, they might be of value to you as well.
How I Turn an Overwhelming and Stressed Day Around
The days when you feel the pressure and stress rising inside of you. When you become unfocused and dark thoughts start to brew and fill your mind. But such days don’t have to continue that way. You can often turn them around or at least make them a lot less uncomfortable and more focused again.
Here’s what I do when I feel trapped in one of those days.
First, just breathe and calm your mind and body down a bit so that you can think a
little more clearly. I do this by first sitting down. Then I breathe with my stomach for a minute or two.
During this time I keep 100% of my focus on the air going in and out of my nostrils.
I have often found that zooming out a bit alleviates stress and inner pressure. When you feel trapped and like the world is pressing down on you then it is easy to get a very unhelpful perspective on things. So I ask myself: Will this matter in 5 years? Or even 5 months? This allows me to see things from a broader perspective.
Unclutter your focus.
When you feel overwhelmed and stressed out it’s easy to get stuck in thinking you have to do 5 things at once to get a handle on things and to get back on track. So I ask myself: Honestly, which ones of these things can wait until tomorrow or next week with no or small consequences?
Go for just taking care of the rest of today one small step at a time.
After I have alleviated pressure, overwhelm and stress by using the three steps above I narrow my focus.
I do not look forward because then I’ll see all the things I have to do to reach my goal or get all the way to done with a project. Instead, I go smaller and focus on just taking care of the rest of today. Nothing more. Tomorrow will come in time and then I will take care of it too. But for now I only focus on what is most important today.
Thinking too long about doing something is often the reason it never gets done.
A teenager is:
* A person who can’t remember to walk the dog but never forgets a phone number.
* A weight watcher who goes on a diet by giving up candy bars before breakfast.
* Someone who can hear his favorite singer 3 blocks away but not his mother calling from the next room.
* A whiz who can operate the latest computer without a lesson but can’t make a bed.
* A student who spends 12 minutes studying history and 12 hours studying for her driver’s license.
* A connoisseur of 2 kinds of fine music–loud and very loud.
* A young woman who loves the cat and tolerates the brother.
* A romantic who never falls in love more than once a week.
* A budding beauty who never smiles until her braces come off.
* A boy who can sleep till noon on any Saturday he suspects the lawn needs mowing.
* An original thinker who is positive that her mother was never a teenager.
Love is the ability and willingness to allow those that you care for to be what they choose for themselves without any insistence that they satisfy you.
There was this West Va. sheriff and his deputy riding along the small town. They spot a car with out of town plates and decided to pull it over. The sheriff says “Where you from boy?”
The man says Chicago. Sheriff says, “Don’t lie to me son I saw them Illinois tags.”
The greatest use of life is to spend it for something that will outlast it.
- Have you ever realized that children are like dogs—loyal and affectionate, but teenagers are like cats?
- It’s so easy to be a dog owner. You feed it, train it, boss it around. And yet it still puts its head on your knee and gazes at you as if you were a Rembrandt painting and bounds indoors with enthusiasm when you call it.
- Then around age 13, your adoring little puppy turns into a cat. When you tell it to come inside, it looks amazed, as if wondering who died and made you emperor. Instead of dogging your doorsteps, it disappears. You won’t see it again until it gets hungry. Then it pauses on its sprint through the kitchen long enough to turn its nose up at whatever you’re serving. When you reach out to ruffle its head, in that old affectionate gesture, it twists away from you, then gives you a blank stare, as if trying to remember where it has seen you before. You, not realizing that the dog is now a cat, think something must be desperately wrong. It seems so antisocial, so distant. It won’t go on family outings.
- Instead of continuing to act like a dog owner, you should learn to behave like a cat owner. Put a dish of food near the door, and let it come to you. Sit still, and it will come, seeking that warm, comforting lap it has not entirely forgotten. Be there to open the door for it.
It’s lonely at the top, but you eat better.
I was listening to a lady who called a radio minister. The minister was a wise, grandfatherly gentlemen who had that calm reassuring voice that can melt all fear.
The lady, who was obviously crying, says, “I was born blind, and I’ve been blind all my life. I don’t mind so much being blind but I have some well-meaning friends who tell me if I had more faith I could be healed and see again.”
The minister asked her, “Tell me, do you carry one of those white canes?”
“Why, yes, I do,” she replied.
“Well, then… the next time someone says that to you, hit them over the head with your cane,” he said. “Then tell them… ‘If you had more faith, that wouldn’t hurt!’ ”
Before you start some work, always ask yourself three questions – Why am I doing it, What the results might be and Will I be successful. Only when you think deeply and find satisfactory answers to these questions, go ahead.
Stay well, do good work, and have fun.
Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.
Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at email@example.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.