We are so accustomed to disguise ourselves to others that in the end we become disguised to ourselves.
François Duc de La
I wonder if we don’t sometime lose our identity as we play parts either dictated by convention and others or by ourselves being afraid to let people know who we really are. I worry sometimes if those who go through life always conforming to a script not of their own choosing will become so personally type cast that they never will feel free enough to let go and become who they really are.
Many of you have heard me say that this is as good as I get and people can take me as I am or not it is up to them. I often embarrass my wife with my candor but I find that openness is not only empowering it can also be fun. What about you, are you you or are you someone else?
Recently personal growth expert Mike Robbins wrote a piece on the subject that hit home for me and I would like to share it in part with you today. Here is what he said:
Increase Fulfillment & Empower Yourself by Being Authentic
We live in a culture that is starving for authenticity. We want our leaders, our co-workers, our family members, our friends, and everyone else we interact with to tell us the truth and to be themselves. Most important, we want to have the personal freedom and confidence to say, do, and be who we really are, without worrying so much about how we appear to others and what they might think or say about us.
Sadly, however, even though we may say we want to live in a way that is true to our deepest passions, beliefs, and desires; most of us don’t and it’s not that easy. We’ve been taught by our parents, teachers, spouses, friends, co-workers, politicians, the media, and others, that it’s more important to be liked and to fit in than it is to be who we truly are.
Authenticity is about enjoying a new sense of freedom to be who we really are–ourselves, natural and without a mask in our relationships, our work, and our life. It takes courage, commitment, and depth to:
– Look within ourselves
– Tell the whole truth (even when we don’t want to)
– Be vulnerable
– Admit, own, and share our true thoughts, feelings, desires, insecurities, passions, embarrassment, dreams, and more.
However, being open and real about all of these things (and more) is what it means to be authentic in life.
Five Principles for Being Your Authentic Self
In order to utilize the power of authenticity in your life as a way to enhance your relationships, increase your fulfillment, and empower yourself, here are five key principles:
1) Know Yourself – Make a commitment to your own personal growth. Discover more of who you are. And, seek out and allow the support, honest feedback, and guidance of others.
2) Transform Your Fear – There’s nothing wrong with having fear, it’s the resistance and denial of fear that is the real problem. When you admit, own, feel, and express your fear, you have the ability to move through it, transform it, and utilize its power in a positive way. Taking action in the face of fear is courageous and empowering.
3) Express Yourself – Have the courage to speak your truth boldly. Deal with conflicts directly. Express your emotions fully. Be vulnerable and real about what you think and how you feel. While on the surface you may worry that this will be seen as "weak," in actuality expressing yourself completely gives you access to real freedom and power.
4) Be Bold – Live, speak, and act with courage, passion, and truth – even if it’s difficult or scary. Go for what you want in your work and in your life. And get back up when you fall down, which you will.
5) Celebrate Who You Are – Appreciate and honor who you are, what you do, and the gifts and talents that you have. Celebrating yourself is not about being arrogant. It’s an awareness of your own power and it’s the key to self-confidence, fulfillment, and authenticity.
Being your authentic self is not for the faint of heart, but once you’re willing to truly engage and do the work to become more real – your life, your work, and your relationships will be more exciting, meaningful, and fulfilling!
Always be a first-rate version of yourself, instead of a second-rate version of somebody else.
The kids tell us:
PERSONAL QUALITIES NECESSARY TO BE A GOOD LOVER:
"One of you should know how to write a check. Because, even if you have tons of love, there is still going to be a lot of bills." (Ava, 8)
SOME SUREFIRE WAYS TO MAKE A PERSON FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU:
"Tell them that you own a whole bunch of candy stores." (Del, 6)
"Don’t do things like have smelly, green sneakers. You might get attention, but attention ain’t the same thing as love." (Alonzo, 9)
"One way is to take the girl out to eat. Make sure it’s something she likes to eat. French fries usually works for me." (Bart, 9)
HOW CAN YOU TELL IF TWO ADULTS EATING DINNER AT A RESTAURANT ARE IN LOVE ?
"Just see if the man picks up the check. That’s how you can tell if he’s in love." (John, 9)
"Lovers will just be staring at each other and their food will get cold. Other people care more about the food." (Brad, 8)
"It’s love if they order one of those desserts that are on fire. They like to order those because it’s just like their hearts are on fire." (Christine, 9)
An alibi is the legal proof that a person wasn’t where he was and, therefore, couldn’t do what he did.
A psychiatrist was trying to comfort a new patient who was terribly upset. "You see, Doc," the patient explained, "my problem is that I like shoes much better than I like boots."
"Why, that’s no problem," answered the doctor. "Most people like shoes better than boots."
The patient was elated, "That’s neat, Doc. How do you like them, fried or scrambled?"
You’re Just Jealous Because The Voices Are Talking To Me
A busy mother sometimes accidentally left pots and pans on the stove with the burners on, so she resorted to posting this reminder on the kitchen door: "STOVE?"
Her daughter, back from college, noticed Mother’s sign. Beneath it she taped her reply: "No — DOOR! Trust me. I went to college."
The Earth Is Full – Go Home
A couple of young fellers were fishing at their special pond off the beaten track when out of the bushes jumped the Game Warden.
Immediately, one of the boys threw his rod down and started running through the woods like everything, and hot on his heels came the Game Warden.
After about a half mile the fella stopped and stooped over with his hands on his thighs to catch his breath and the Game Warden finally caught up to him…
"Lets see yer fishin’ license, Boy!!" the Warden gasped.
With that, the fella pulled out his wallet and gave the Game Warden a valid fishing license.
"Well, son," said the Game Warden, "you must be about as dumb as a box of rocks! You don’t have to run from me if you have a valid license!"
"Yes, sir," replied the young feller, "But my friend back there, well, he don’t have one…"
To be nobody but yourself in a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make you everybody else means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight; and never stop fighting.
Stay well, do good work, and have fun.
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