Ray's musings and humor

Welcome December

Ray’s Daily

December 1, 2022

http://rays-daily.com

Year’s end is neither an end nor a beginning but a going on, with all the wisdom that experience can instill in us.

Hal Borland

Here we go, the last month of the year. We still have time to work on being who we want to be.

Please take the time to let folks know how important they and how glad you are to know them.

Recipe for forever

Gather all of the ingredients together, so that they are close at hand! Get a clean cloth and wipe the bowl clean of any lingering dust from the past.

Take maturity, respect and friendship, and stir gently.

Add unlimited amounts of compassion and kindness, and mix well.

To this, add caring by the handfuls and fold in trust.

Continue stirring gently, adding listening, honesty, and large amounts of communication.

Slip in some dreams, goals, and firm pieces of keeping promises.

Bake in a home filled with peace, beauty and serenity.

Before you taste the finished product, sprinkle liberally with patience, love, and a touch of spice.

Serve very hot, with imagination on the side.

Author Unknown

~~~

The color of springtime is in the flowers; the color of winter is in the imagination.

 Terri Guillemets

~~~

He said: About five years ago the battery in my beat-up VW beetle had died because I left the lights on overnight . I was in a hurry to get to work on time so I ran into the house to get my wife to give me a hand to start the car.

I told her to get into our second car, a prehistoric oversized gas guzzler, and use it to push my car fast enough to start it. I pointed out to her that because the VW had an automatic transmission, it needed to be pushed at least 30 MPH for it to start. She said fine, hoped into her car and drove off.

I sat there fuming wondering what can she be doing. A minute passed by and when I saw her in the rearview mirror coming at me at about 40 MPH, I realized that I should have been A LOT clearer with my directions.

~~~

I’m just moving clouds today – tomorrow I’ll try mountains.

~~~

Feggala Rothstein from Chicago decided to go on vacation to Miami in the 1920s. Upon trying to checking into a nice hotel, the concierge told her, “Sorry, there’s no vacancy.” Just then, a man checked out. Feggala then exclaimed, “Good, now you have a room.”

“Sorry”, the man behind the counter replied, “this hotel is restricted.”

“And what does that mean?” she asked him.

“Jews aren’t allowed here!”

“Well what makes you think I’m Jewish?” she shot back.

“I know you are!”

“Well, I’m not! I’m a Catholic!” she insisted.

“So tell me,” the man replied, “Did God have a son?”

“Sure.”

“What was his name?”

“Jesus.”

“And where was he born?”

“In Bethlehem, in a stable.”

“And WHY was he born there?”

“Because a schmuck like you wouldn’t rent his parents a room!”

~~~

Act as if what you do makes a difference. It does.

William James

~~~

There was a gentleman in the hospital bed next to me. He was covered with bandages from head to toe. I said to him, “What do you do for a living?” He said, “I’m a former window washer.” I asked, “When did you give it up?” He replied, “Halfway down.”

~~~

Surely I deserve some kind of recognition for all the bad things I haven’t done.

~~~

While working at a pizza parlor, I observed a man ordering a small pizza to go. He appeared to be alone and the cook asked him if he would like it cut into four pieces or six. He thought about it for some time before responding. “Just cut it into four pieces. I don’t think I’m hungry enough to eat six pieces.

~~~

Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless.

Prov 18:24

~~~

The flight home from a recent business trip was pretty empty. So, the pilot made a simple request of the passengers.

“We have a little extra room tonight, folks,” he said over the PA system. “So, if you wouldn’t mind, please take a window seat so that the competition thinks the plane is full.”

~~~

What the new year brings to you will depend a great deal on what you bring to the new year.

Vern McLellan

~~~

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than twenty years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@comcast.net. Back issues are posted at http://rays-daily,com/ currently there are hundreds of  readers from around the world.

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