Ray's musings and humor

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Ray’s Daily

February 8, 2022

http://rays-daily.com

“Count your blessings. Once you realize how valuable you are and how much you have going for you, the smiles will return, the sun will break out, the music will play, and you will finally be able to move forward the life that God intended for you with grace, strength, courage, and confidence.”

Og Mandino

Ray’s Daily first published on February 8, 2007

We are back home again in Indiana. The weather may be sub-zero (we just left the Florida warmth), and we again found that there really is no place like home.

It has been an interesting few weeks to say the least. Fortunately we have been able to come home knowing that those dear to us in Florida are on the mend.

As I spent time in the rehabilitation hospital I saw many people who had suffered serious injury or illness and were working there way back to whatever life has in store for them in the future. As I watched the word that came to mind was resiliency as always I marvel at what the human spirit can do. I again learned however that the bounce back from adversity requires work. The work that it requires is not easy and so much of it is dependent on attitude, while some give up others fight their way back. I think Mandino’s quote above is the key, it is knowing how valuable you are and how much you have going for you that makes the difference. We may never return to what we once were but our hearts and minds are what make us special and they can only be taken away by ourselves.

Even in the worst of times we still have each other. I feel your pain, I share your joy, for together we are one. So stay well if you can, but by all means stay who you are because you are needed.

~~~

“My great hope is to laugh as much as I cry; to get my work done and try to love somebody and have the courage to accept the love in return.”

Maya Angelou

~~~

He said: As a high school football coach, I know that student athletes tend to focus too much on sports.

Bob, a fellow coach, was talking about one such player who called him at home one night. When his wife informed the kid that Bob wasn’t home, he became frantic and said he had to speak to the coach right away.

“Just calm down, and I’ll have him call you as soon as he gets home,” the coach’s wife told him. “What’s your number”?

The flustered kid replied, “Three.”

~~~

“I was always taught to respect my elders and I’ve now reached the age when I don’t have anybody to respect.”

George Burns

~~~

Computers and Tech support

Tech support:  Good day. How may I help you?

Male customer:  Hello… I can’t print.

Tech support: Would you click on “start”  for me and…

Customer:  Listen pal; don’t start getting technical on me! I’m not Bill Gates.

*

Customer:  Hi, good afternoon, this is Martha, I can’t print. Every time I try, it says ‘Can’t find printer’.  I’ve even lifted the printer and placed it in front of the monitor, but the computer still says he can’t find it…

*

Tech support:  What’s on your monitor now, ma’am?

Customer:  A teddy bear my boyfriend bought for me at the 7-11.

*

Tech support:  How may I help you?

Customer:  I’m writing my first e-mail.

Tech support:  OK, and what seems to be the problem?

Customer:  Well, I have the letter ‘a’ in the address, but how do I get the circle around it?

*

A woman customer called the Canon help desk with a problem with her printer.

Tech support:  Are you running it under windows?

Customer:  “No, my desk is next to the door, but that is a good point.  The man sitting in the cubicle next to me is under a window, and his printer is working fine.”

~~~

The supermarket is where you spend 30 minutes hunting for instant coffee.

~~~

He said: My friend Eric and I walk in the mall for exercise every morning so we see when the stores have changed their window displays each lap around.  Our route takes us past Victoria’s Secret and today we noticed they too have a new campaign on with a new product called the Victoria’s Secret 3 in one bra. Well we both looked at it for some time this morning and neither of us seems to be able to figure out how they can ever get more than two in that thing.

~~~

Few people know that baldness comes from the Lord.

God made billions of men, and those he’s ashamed of he covers with hair!

~~~

Couples who have lived together a long time have their own way of communicating.  

A woman overheard her aunt and uncle one day, “What are you looking for in that closet?” she asked.  

“Nothing,” he answered.  

“Well, it’s not in there. Look under the bed.

~~~

“Virtue is its own punishment.”

Aneurin Bevan

~~~

A little girl walks in to the lounge one Sunday morning while her Dad is reading the paper.

“Where does poo come from?” she asks.

The father feeling a little perturbed that his 5 year old daughter is already asking difficult questions thinks for a moment and says: “Well you know we just ate breakfast?”

“Yes,” answers the girl.

“Well the food goes into our tummies and our bodies take out all the good stuff, and then whatever is left over comes out of our bottoms when we go to the toilet, and that is poo.”

The little girl looks shocked, and stares, at him with a watery eyes in stunned silence for a few seconds and asks, “And Tigger?”

~~~

There is always someplace better than here, until you get there.

~~~

My wife doesn’t complain often, but once she was having a old fashioned “heart-to-heart” with me and said, “Hon, you never listen to me. Every time I try to talk to you, you get this far-away look in your eyes after only a few seconds. Please promise me you’ll try to work on that.”

The last thing I remember was replying, “I’m sorry, what was that you were saying?”

~~~

“Life has taught us that love does not consist in gazing at each other, but in looking outward together in the same direction”

Antoine de Saint-Exupery

~~~

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than twenty years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@comcast.net. Back issues are posted at http://rays-daily,com/ currently there are hundreds of  readers from around the world.

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