January 17, 2022
Happiness is not the absence of problems, it’s the ability to deal with them.
Some of us find our happiness to be elusive. To often we expect more than is realistic. In my case, I think I am generally a happy person because I appreciate what I have and don’t yearn for more. I have learned that focusing on the good things I already have are the keys to my happiness.
Here are excerpts from an article by Marc Chernoff that I agree with I hope you will too.
10 Things You Do NOT Need to Be Happier in Life
- To please everyone – Be careful not to give so much of yourself to others that you end up completely losing yourself. When you go around pleasing everyone but yourself, you are the one that gets hurt in the end.
- Everything to be easy – You have to do hard things to be happy in life. The things no one else is doing. The things that frighten you. The things others can’t do for you. The things that make you question how much longer you can hold on and push forward. Because those are the things that define you. Those are the things that make the difference between existing and living – between knowing the path and walking the path – between a life of mediocrity and a life filled with happiness and success.
- Certainty and guarantees – Some people build too many walls in their lives and not enough bridges. It sounds crazy, but they would rather be certain they’re miserable, than risk being happy. Don’t be one of them. Open yourself up. Take chances. Run free. To accomplish amazing things, you must not only act, but also dream, not only plan, but also believe.
- To be better than others – The size of our universe shrinks dramatically when we place ourselves at the center – when we think everyone is our competition – when we think we have to be richer, smarter, and more attractive than the person sitting next to us. Such a goal just keeps a person alienated and tirelessly running in place.
- More control over everything and everyone – Sometimes we put too much interest into trying to control every tiny aspect of our lives. Learn to relax and ride the path that life takes you sometimes. Incredible change will happen in your life when you decide to take control of what you do have power over instead of craving control over what you do not. Freeing yourself from trying to control the insignificant and uncontrollable things lets you experience more of the goodness around you.
- Immense moments of glory – Graduations, wedding days, lavish vacations – these times are often fun-filled and deeply celebrated, but these times pass, because time passes. This is something we rarely grasp at first. True, lasting happiness is found in the appreciation of all the small things.
- Other people to constantly validate me – Relationships are essential, but happiness originates from within. It is not exclusively dependent on external validation or on other people. You become vulnerable and can be easily hurt when your feelings of security and happiness depend entirely on the behavior and actions of others. Never give all your power to anyone else. Learn to love and respect yourself first, before loving the idea of other people loving and respecting you.
- Perfect harmony in all relationships at all times – Harmony in relationships is nice when it’s sincere, but too often we try to fake it. Effective communication is king. You have to talk it out sometimes. After all, the only way to be happy in life is to live with integrity.
- A superior time and place – The reason many people find it so hard to be happy is that they always see the past better than it was, the present worse than it is, and the future less resolved than it will be. The key, of course, is to do the opposite. Appreciate your past without reliving it, handle your present with confidence, and face your future without fear. Life is simply too short to spend at war with yourself. Letting go of the past and future is your first step to happiness and peace in the present.
- Happiness 24/7 – Absolutely no one is happy all of the time. Because you simply can’t be happy unless you’re unhappy sometimes. This is a harsh truth, I know. Just keep in mind that it’s perfectly normal to experience considerable fluctuations in your level of happiness from day to day, month to month, and even year to year. Choose positivity, always. The greatest act of faith some days is to simply get up and face the day, with a smile.
Happiness consists more in conveniences of pleasure that occur everyday than in great pieces of good fortune that happen but seldom.
Depend on the rabbit’s foot if you will, but remember it didn’t work for the rabbit.
“I was relaxing in my favorite chair on Sunday,” said Doug to Bill, “reading the newspaper, watching a ball game on TV and listening to another on the radio, drinking a beer, eating a snack, and scratching the dog with my foot — and my wife has the nerve to accuse me of just sitting there doing nothing !”
Why do you get on a bus and a train but get into a car?
A class professor was giving a lecture on company slogans and was asking his students if they were familiar with them.
“Joe,” he asked, “which company has the slogan, ‘come fly the friendly skies’?”
Joe answered the correct airline.
“Brenda, can you tell me which company has the slogan, “Don’t leave home without it?”
Brenda answered the correct credit card company with no difficulty.
“Now John, Tell me which company bears the slogan, ‘Just do it’?”
And John answered, “Mom….”
Always keep several get well cards on the mantel;
if unexpected guests arrive, they will think you’ve been sick and unable to clean.
A man calling refrigerator repair service: “My refrigerator isn’t working!”
“What kind is it?”
“It’s a small one.”
“Electric, gas or propane?”
“Ah! Then the problem is most likely vapor lock. You don’t need a service call, just turn the refrigerator upside down for a few minutes to allow the lock to clear. Then put it back and all should be well”
Second call, a few minutes later: “The least you could have done is to tell me to empty the fridge first!”
Without geography, you’re nowhere.
A minister told his congregation, “Next week I plan to preach about the sin of lying. To help you understand my sermon, I want you all to read Mark 17.”
The following Sunday, as he prepared to deliver his sermon, the minister asked for a show of hands. He wanted to know how many had read Mark 17. Every hand went up. The minister smiled and said, “Mark has only sixteen chapters. I will now proceed with my sermon on the sin of lying.”
Don’t worry about the world coming to an end today. It is already tomorrow in Australia.
I pulled into the crowded parking lot at the Super Wal-Mart Shopping Center and rolled down the car windows to make sure my Labrador Retriever pup had fresh air. She was stretched full-out on the back seat and I wanted to impress upon her that she must remain there. I walked to the curb backward, pointing my finger at the car and saying emphatically, ‘Now you stay. Do you hear me?’ ‘Stay! Stay!’
The driver of a nearby car, a pretty blonde young lady, gave me a strange look and said,
‘Why don’t you just put it in park ?’
Even a happy life cannot be without a measure of darkness, and the word happy would lose its meaning if it were not balanced by sadness. It is far better to take things as they come along with patience and equanimity.
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