October 5, 2021
“You’re going to go through tough times – that’s life. But I say, ‘Nothing happens to you, it happens for you.’ See the positive in negative events.”
These have been difficult days for me as I have been concerned about my oldest daughters health. She has suffered with a kidney stone that has resulted in complications that had put her into the hospital. They have fought to ease her pain and cure an infection, while it is not over she is doing better.
The following helps me to keep things in perspective.
20 Tough Truths About Life No One Wants to Admit Right Now
WRITTEN by MARC CHERNOFF
See life as it is, without all the ideals and fantasies you’ve been preoccupied with. Let go of all of those stressful distractions, and just experience this moment.
- There’s a lot about our lives we absolutely can’t control. – You cannot control everything that happens in life, but you can control how you respond. In your response is your greatest power.
- Our expectations often make us utterly unhappy. – Happiness is letting go of what you assume your life is supposed to be like right now and sincerely appreciating it for everything that it is.
- We will always be incredibly imperfect. – If you wait until you’re “perfect” before you share your stories, ideas, talents, and gifts with the world, no one will ever hear from you.
- A moment spent worrying is a moment wasted. – Worrying will never change the outcome. Do more, worry less. Train your mind to see the lesson in every situation, and then make the best of it.
- The best lessons often come from the hardest days. – Stand strong. Sometimes you have to experience a low point in life to learn a good lesson you couldn’t have learned any other way. (Read On Fire.)
- Success easily gets to our heads, and failure easily gets to our hearts. – Our character is often revealed at our highs and lows. Be humble at the mountaintops. Be steadfast in the valleys. Be faithful in between.
- We confuse being busy with being productive. – What you pay attention to grows. So focus on what truly matters and let go of what does not.
- More money left unmanaged just creates more problems. – Yes, we need money to live. Earn it. Save it. Invest it. But avoid spending money you haven’t earned, to buy things you don’t need, to impress folks you don’t even know. Manage your money so it doesn’t end up managing you.
- Most of us don’t need more to be happy – we need less. – When things aren’t adding up in your life, begin subtracting. Life gets a lot simpler when you clear the clutter (mental and physical) that makes it complicated. (Angel and I discuss this further in the “Simplicity” chapter of 1,000 Little Things Happy, Successful People Do Differently.)
- Our fancy gadgets often get in our way and dehumanize us. – We all need to learn to be more human again. Don’t avoid eye contact. Don’t hide behind gadgets. Smile often. Ask about people’s stories. Listen.
- As a society, we are utterly infatuated with outer beauty. – If the whole world suddenly went blind, how many folks would still be able to see your beauty? Focus within. Be beautiful on the inside too. And always do your best to see beauty in others.
- Most of the arguments we have with one another are pointless. – Be selective in your battles. Oftentimes peace is better than being right. You simply don’t need to attend every argument you’re invited to.
- We default to judging others by their actions and ourselves by our ideals. – Be the type of person you want to meet and be around. Be the type of person whose actions, words, and values always agree with one another.
- We don’t always get what we give. – You will end up sadly disappointed if you expect people will always do for you as you do for them. Not everyone has the same heart as you.
- None of us know anyone worth continually blaming. – Steal your power back. Free yourself to step forward on your own two legs. The best part of your life will start on the day you decide your life is your own, with no one to endlessly lean on, rely on, or blame.
- It’s easier to hold on to the way things are than it is to let go and grow. – Letting go and moving forward means coming to the realization that some things are a part of your history, but not a part of your destiny.
- If we want the benefits of something in life, we have to also want the costs. – Most people dream of the rewards without the risks. The triumph without the trials. Don’t be one of them. Life doesn’t work that way. When you find something you want, start by asking yourself: What am I willing to give up to get it?
- Even with all our advancements, progress still requires old-fashioned work. – In a culture that seeks quick and easy results, we must learn the beauty of effort, patience, and perseverance. Be strong, be present, and build positive daily rituals that get you there. (Angel and I build positive, life-changing rituals with our students in the “Goals and Growth” module of the Getting Back to Happy Course.)
- We never feel 100% ready when good opportunities arise. – Most great opportunities in life force us to grow emotionally and intellectually. They force us to stretch ourselves and our comfort zones, which means we won’t feel totally comfortable at first. And when we don’t feel comfortable, we don’t feel ready.
- Many of us will have our lives cut short. – One way or another, none of us live forever. And it’s much harder to change the length of your life than it is to change the depth of it. So, how deep will you go today? That’s something you should reflect on. Because how we spend our days is how we spend our lives.
“I have very strong feelings about how you lead your life. You always look ahead, you never look back.”
A boy is about to go on his first date, and is nervous about what to talk about. He asks his father for advice. The father replies: “My son, there are three subjects that always work. These are food, family, and philosophy.”
The boy picks up his date and they go to a soda fountain. Ice cream sodas in front of them, they stare at each other for a long time, as the boy’s nervousness builds.
He remembers his father’s advice, and chooses the first topic.
He asks the girl: “Do you like spinach?” She says “No,” and the silence returns.
After a few more uncomfortable minutes, the boy thinks of his father’s suggestion and turns to the second item on the list. He asks, “Do you have a brother?” Again, the girl says “No” and there is silence once again.
The boy then plays his last card. He thinks of his father’s advice and asks the girl the following question: “If you had a brother, would he like spinach?”
If the computer is so smart, how come it gets blamed for our mistakes?
Doug had always been teased by his friends that his wife was more successful than he was. Some even went so far as to insinuate that he was overshadowed by her and henpecked. Doug had a sense of humor and always laughed it off. One day, one of his fiends asked the tiresome question AGAIN, “Who wears the pants in your family?”
“I do,” replied Doug. Then, after a pause, he added, “I also wash and iron them.”
“The most likely way for the world to be destroyed, most experts agree, is by accident. That’s where we come in; we’re computer professionals. We cause accidents.”
What Exactly Is Marriage?
- “Marriage is when you get to keep your girl and don’t have to give her back to her parents” -Eric, six years old
- “When somebody’s been dating for a while, the boy might propose to the girl. He says to her, ‘I’ll take you for a whole life, or at least until we have kids and get divorced, but you got to do one particular thing for me.’ Then she says yes, but she’s wondering what the thing is and whether it’s naughty or not. She can’t wait to find out.” -Anita, nine years old
- How Does a Person Decide Whom to marry? “You flip a nickel, and heads means you stay with him and tails means you try the next one.” -Kelly, nine years old
- “My mother says to look for a man who is kind….That’s what I’ll do….I’ll find somebody who’s kinda tall and handsome.” -Carolyn, eight years old
Action is the antidote for despair.
She said: As I was nursing my baby, my cousin’s six-year-old daughter came into the room. Never having seen anyone breast-feed before, she was intrigued and full of all kinds of questions about what I was doing. After mulling over my answers, she remarked, “My mom has some of those, but I don’t think she knows how to use them.”
For fast acting relief; try slowing down.
A noted psychiatrist was a guest at a blonde gathering, and his hostess naturally broached the subject in which the doctor was most at ease. “Would you mind telling me, Doctor,” she asked, “how you detect a mental deficiency in somebody who appears completely normal?” “Nothing is easier,” he replied. “You ask a simple question which anyone should answer with no trouble. If he hesitates, that puts you on the track.” “What sort of question?” “Well, you might ask him, ‘Captain Cook made three trips around the world and died during one of them. Which one?’ The blonde thought a moment, then said with a nervous laugh, “You wouldn’t happen to have another example would you? I must confess I don’t know much about history….”
He who knows that enough is enough will always have enough.
Two retired professors were vacationing with their wives at a hotel in the Catskills.
They were sitting on the verandah one summer evening, watching the sun set.
The history professor asked the psychology professor, “Have you read Marx?”
To which the professor of psychology replied, “Yes and I think it’s these pesky wicker chairs.”
“Don’t bother just to be better than your contemporaries or predecessors. Try to be better than yourself.”
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