Ray's musings and humor

Truth

Ray’s Daily

August 31, 2021

http://rays-daily.com

Yes, the truth may hurt but lies will become a crutch and will cripple you.

Stephen T. Scott

Ray’s Daily first published on August 31, 2004

One of the things that truly frightens me this political season is how easy it is for people I know to say whatever justifies the ends that they seek. The same applies to the advocacy groups, the political spokespersons, and others. What must our children think when they see us placing less value on truth and accuracy than we do on winning or getting what we want. It seems too easy to sacrifice morality for expediency. I did not write the following but I believe it is absolutely right.

If you plant honesty, you will reap trust.

If you plant goodness, you will reap friends.

If you plant humility, you will reap greatness.

If you plant perseverance, you will reap victory.

If you plant consideration, you will reap harmony.

If you plant hard work, you will reap success.

If you plant forgiveness, you will reap reconciliation.

If you plant openness, you will  reap intimacy.

If you plant patience, you will reap improvements.

If you plant faith, you will reap miracles.

But…

If you plant dishonesty, you will reap distrust.

If you plant selfishness, you will reap loneliness.

If you plant pride, you will reap destruction.

If you plant envy, you will reap trouble.

If you plant laziness, you will reap stagnation.

If you plant bitterness, you will reap isolation.

If you plant greed, you will reap loss.

If you plant gossip, you will reap enemies.

If you plant worries, you will reap wrinkles.

If you plant sin, you will reap guilt.

So, be careful what you plant, now; it will determine what you will reap tomorrow. The seeds you now scatter will make life worse or better for you or for the ones who will come after you.

Yes, someday, you will enjoy the fruits or you will pay for the choices you plant today.

Believe or not, it’s up to you.

~~~

It is unfortunate, considering that enthusiasm moves the world, that so few enthusiasts can be trusted to speak the truth.

Arthur James Balfour

~~~

There are a number of nurses and Doctors on our list. I don’t know if any of the nurses are graduate nurses but I guess I will find out,

A Graduate Nurse throws up when the patient does.

An experienced nurse calls housekeeping when a patient throws up.

A Graduate Nurse wears so many pins on their name badge you can’t read it.

An experienced nurse doesn’t wear a name badge for liability reasons.

A Graduate Nurse charts too much.

An experienced nurse doesn’t chart enough.

A Graduate Nurse loves to run to codes.

An experienced nurse makes graduate nurses run to codes.

A Graduate Nurse wants everyone to know they are a nurse.

An experienced nurse doesn’t want anyone to know they are a nurse.

A Graduate Nurse keeps detailed notes on a pad.

An experienced nurse writes on the back of their hand, paper scraps, napkins, etc.

A Graduate Nurse will spend all day trying to reorient a patient.

An experienced nurse will chart the patient is disoriented and restrain them.

A Graduate Nurse can hear a beeping I-med at 50 yards.

An experienced nurse can’t hear any alarms at any distance.

A Graduate Nurse loves to hear abnormal heart and breath sounds.

An experienced nurse doesn’t want to know about them unless the patient is symptomatic.

A Graduate Nurse spends 2 hours giving a patient a bath.

An experienced nurse lets the CNA give the patient a bath.

A Graduate Nurse thinks people respect Nurses.

An experienced nurse knows everybody blames everything on the nurse.

A Graduate Nurse looks for blood on a bandage hoping they will get to change it.

An experienced nurse knows a little blood never hurt anybody.

A Graduate Nurse looks for a chance “to work with the family”

An experienced nurse avoids the family.

A Graduate Nurse expects meds and supplies to be delivered on time.

An experienced nurse expects them to never be delivered at all.

A Graduate Nurse will spend days bladder training an incontinent patient.

An experienced nurse will insert a Foley catheter.

A Graduate Nurse always answers their phone.

An experienced nurse checks their caller ID before answering the phone.

A Graduate Nurse thinks psych patients are interesting.

An experienced nurse thinks psych patients are crazy.

A Graduate Nurse carries reference books in their bag.

An experienced nurse carries magazines, lunch, and some “cough syrup” in their bag.

A Graduate Nurse doesn’t find this funny.

An experienced nurse does.

~~~

“Make It Idiot Proof, and Someone Will Make a Better Idiot”

~~~

“Do you believe in life after death?” the boss asked one of his employees.

“Yes, sir,” the new recruit replied.

“Well, then, that makes everything just fine,” the boss went on. “After you left early yesterday to go to your grandmother’s funeral, she stopped in to see you.”

~~~

All people smile in the same language.

~~~

Rick, fresh out of accounting school, went to a interview for a good paying job. The company boss asked various questions about him and his education, but then asked him, “What is three times seven?”

“22,” Rick replied.  After he left, he double-checked it on his calculator (he *knew* he should have taken it to the interview!) and realised he wouldn’t get the job.

About two weeks later, he got a letter that said he was hired for the job! He was not one to look a gift horse in the mouth, but was still very curious. The next day, he went in and asked why he got the job, even though he got such a simple question wrong. The boss shrugged and said, “Well, you were the closest…”

~~~

Anger is a condition in which the tongue works faster than the mind.

~~~

A golf pro dragged himself into the clubhouse looking as though he’d just escaped a tornado.

“What’s wrong?” a woman asked.

“I just lost a game to Houlihan,” the pro said.

“What? But Houlihan’s the worst player I’ve ever seen. How could he have beaten you?”

“He tricked me,” the pro said. “On the first tee, he asked for a handicap. I told him he could have 30, 40, 50 strokes – any handicap he wanted. He said, ‘Just give me two gotchas.'”

“What’s a gotcha?” asked the woman.

“That’s what I wanted to know,” the pro said. “Houlihan said, ‘You’ll see.’ Then, as I was teeing off, just as I had my club poised, he screamed out ‘Gotcha!'”

“I can guess what happened,” the woman said.

“Sure,” the pro said. “The scream threw me off, and I missed the ball completely.”

“Understandable,” the woman said. “But still, that’s only one swing. How did he win the game?”

The pro answered, “You try swinging at a golf ball while waiting for that second ‘gotcha!'”

~~~

“If a man does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer. Let him step to the music he hears, however measured or far away.”

Henry David Thoreau

~~~

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than twenty years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@comcast.net. Back issues are posted at http://rays-daily,com/ currently there are hundreds of  readers from around the world.

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