Ray's musings and humor

Ray’s Daily

July 21, 2020

http://rays-daily.com

Doing the right thing is more important than doing the thing right.    

Peter F. Drucker

Mask

It seems these days that more than ever we can be part of the solution or part of the problem. I cannot remember a time when all of our citizens were needed to help mitigate something as terrible as the Covid-91 pandemic. I am dismayed that so many are failing to take the precautions that can help reduce the spread of this awful disease.

I think the failure to wear a mask, to maintain distance separation and to wash and sanitize regularly shows a lack of intelligence and a disregard for others. It is not bad enough that they put themselves at risk of illness and even death it is even worse that they threaten so many others.

Please be one of the good people that are smart enough to protect them selves and those around them.

Promise yourself

  • To be so strong that nothing can disturb your peace of mind.
  • To talk health, happiness, and prosperity to every person you meet.
  • To make all your friends feel that there is something in them.
  • To look at the sunny side of everything and make your optimism come true.
  • To think only the best, to work only for the best, and to expect only the best.
  • To be just as enthusiastic about the success of others as you are about your own.
  • To forget the mistakes of the past and press on to the greater achievements of the future.
  • To wear a cheerful countenance at all times and give every living creature you meet a smile.
  • To give so much time to the improvement of yourself that you have no time to criticize others.
  • To be too large for worry, too noble for anger, too strong for fear; and too happy to permit the presence of trouble.
  • To think well of yourself and to proclaim this fact to the world, not in loud words, but in great deeds.
  • To live in the faith that the whole world is on your side so long as you are true to the best that is in you.

C.D. Larson

~~~

You cannot make yourself feel something you do not feel, but you can make yourself do right in spite of your feelings.

Pearl S. Buck

~~~

DEEP OBSERVATIONS ON LIFE

1) When I die, I want to die like my grandfather–who died peacefully in his sleep.  Not screaming like all the passengers in his car.”

Author Unknown

2) Advice for the day: If you have a lot of tension and you get a headache, do what it says on the aspirin bottle: “Take two aspirin” and “Keep away from children.”

Author Unknown

3) “Oh, you hate your job?  Why didn’t you say so?  There’s a support group for that.  It’s called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar.”

Drew Carey

4) “The problem with the designated driver program, it’s not a desirable job, but if you ever get sucked into doing it, have fun with it.  At the end of the night, drop them off at the wrong house.”

Jeff Foxworthy

5) “If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an infant’s life, she will choose to save the infant’s life! without even considering if there is a man on base.”

Dave Barry

6) “Relationships are hard.  It’s like a full time job, and we should treat it like one.  If your boyfriend or girlfriend wants to leave you, they should give you two weeks’ notice. There should be severance pay, the day before they leave you, they should have to find you a temp.”

Bob Ettinger

7) “My Mom said she learned how to swim when someone took her out in the lake and threw her off the boat.  I said, ‘Mom, they weren’t trying to teach you how to swim.'”

Paula Poundstone

8) “A study in the Washington Post says that women have better verbal skills than men.  I just want to say to the authors of that study: “Duh.”

Conan O’Brien

9) “Why does Sea World have a seafood restaurant??  I’m halfway through my fish burger and I realize, Oh my God…. I could be eating a slow learner.”

Lynda Montgomery

10) “I think that’s how Chicago got started; Bunch of people in New York said, ‘Gee, I’m enjoying the crime and the poverty, but it just isn’t cold enough. Let’s go west.'”

Richard Jeni

11) “If life were fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead.”

Johnny Carson

12) “Sometimes I think war is God’s way of teaching us geography.”

Paul Rodriguez

13) “My parents didn’t want to move to Florida, but they turned sixty and that’s the law.”

Jerry Seinfeld

14) “Remember in elementary school, you were told that in case of fire you have to line up quietly in a single file line from smallest to tallest.  What is the logic in that?  What, do tall people burn slower?”

Warren Hutcherson

15) “Bigamy is having one wife/husband too many. Monogamy is the same.”

Oscar Wilde

16) “Suppose you were an idiot and suppose you were a member of Congress… But I repeat myself.”

Mark Twain

17) “Our bombs are smarter than the average high school student.  At least they can find Afghanistan.”

Whitney Brown

18) “Women need a reason to have sex.  Men just need a place.”

Billy Crystal

19) “You can say any foolish thing to a dog, and the dog will give you a look that says, ‘My God, you’re right! I never would’ve thought of that!'”

Dave Barry

20) Do you know why they call it “PMS”?  Because “Mad Cow Disease” was taken.

Unknown, presumed deceased

~~~

Your friends may lie to you, your mirror deceive you, but a flight of stairs will be brutally frank.

~~~

A man walked into a supermarket, asking to buy half a head of lettuce. The stock boy told him that they only sold whole heads of lettuce, but the man was insistent: he did not need a whole head, only a half head. The boy said he would go ask his manager about the matter.

The boy walked into the back room and said, “There’s some jerk out there who wants to buy only a half a head of lettuce.” As he finished speaking, he turned around to find the man standing right behind him, so he added, “–and this gentleman wants to buy the other half.”

The manager okayed the deal and the man went on his way. Afterward, the manager said, “You almost got yourself in a lot of trouble earlier, but I must say I was impressed with the way you got yourself out of it. You think on your feet and we like that around here. Where are you from, son?”

“Texas, sir.”

“Oh really? Why did you leave Texas?” Asked the manager.

The boy said, “Nothing but loose women and ball players down there.”

“Hey!” Said the manager, “My wife is from Texas!!”

“No kidding!” Says the boy. “What team did she play for?”

~~~

My basic principle is that you don’t make decisions because they are easy; you don’t make them because they are cheap; you don’t make them because they’re popular; you make them because they’re right.    

Theodore Hesburgh

~~~

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than twenty years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at http://rays-daily,com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

Tag Cloud

%d bloggers like this: