Ray's musings and humor

My Best Friends

Ray’s Daily

May 29. 2020

http://rays-daily.com

Good friends are like stars. You don’t always see them, but you know they’re always there.

Best Friends

Yesterday was my youngest daughter’s birthday and next Monday it will be my oldest daughter’s birthday. They both have had great careers and provided us with four wonderful grandchildren.

These accomplished women have also become my wife’s and my best friends. We have always been close but never as close as we are now. You see they have become our best friends. They are responsible making our senior years as golden as they are for us.

The following poem could have been written about our best friends, our daughters.

 

           Friends

Friends answer your needs before their own.
You come to them with your hunger,
And they satisfy you with peace.
That’s how friends are.

 

Friends let you speak your mind,
Without worrying what their thoughts will be.
Friends know when you are silent,
They need to listen your heart.

 Friends share the joy and the pain.
They know about desire and rejection.
Friends allow you to be who you are,
Without expectations of who you should be.

 

Friends don’t come with a purpose,
They don’t come with a plan.
They come to enlighten your spirit,
They come to brighten your heart.

 They come to give you a hand when needed
And expect nothing in return.
It is the little things that friends do.
Like fill your heart with pleasure, hope and joy.

 AAHH… The Sweetness Of Friendship
There can be no price placed on Friendship
It has once been told.
For Friendships are worth far more than gold.

~~~

Anything is possible when you have the right people there to support you.

Misty Copeland

~~~

Be careful, many of these laws are still on the books

1-When visiting Louisiana, remember that it is illegal to gargle in public…you can do just about anything else in public, but NO gargling!

2-And be careful that you do not get caught shaving while driving in Massachusetts or you’ll be in real trouble.

3-If you’re going to be driving through Utah, be alert because the birds have the right of way on the state highways.

4-And walking down the streets of Maine with your shoes strings untied is

also illegal.

5-Oh, and in Atlanta, not only is it illegal to tie your giraffe to a telephone pole but if you get caught dressing a mannequin without shutting the window shades, you could be in big trouble.

6-When in Nebraska, keep in mind not to spit against wind because not only is it messy, its also illegal.

7-Eating out in Connecticut became so much more pleasant once the law requiring restaurateurs to provide separate nose-blowing and non-nose-blowing sections, went into effect.

8-And if you decide to order cherry pie while eating in Kansas, don’t waste your time asking it to be served with a scoop of ice-cream on top…it against the law.

9-In California, its against the law to peel an orange in your hotel room….I guess its ok to peel it in the hallway & then go into your room.

10-If you’re planning to do any fishing while visiting Chicago, be sure you don’t do it in your pajamas or you might spend the rest of your vacation in jail.

11-And if you’re going to set a fire under your mule, don’t do it in Ohio..yep, its against the law. Can you believe it?

12-Whistling under water will result in more than getting water in your nose, it will also get you put in jail if you do it in Vermont.

13-And while you and your beloved spouse are enjoying the Florida sun, don’t throw dishes if you happen to have a little disagreement with each other. If you break more than 3 a day, you could spend the rest of your vacation eating off of metal trays in the county jail.

We’re not the only ones with the wacky laws. If you’re planning a trip out of the country be aware that….

14-It is illegal to land a flying saucer in the vineyards of France.

15-And last but not least, if you take ill while in Iceland, never seek medical help from anyone who’s shingle reads: “Scottulaejnir”. You see, ANYONE, can practice medicine in Iceland as long as they display this sign. Loosely translated it means, “Quack Doctor”

~~~

“Laziness is nothing more than the habit of resting before you get tired.”

Jules Renard

~~~

I had just pulled into a parking spot at the home improvement store when smoke and flames began pouring from under my hood. Frantic, I bolted into the store and ran up to the first clerk I saw. As luck would have it, he was standing behind the customer service counter.

“Please help,” I gasped. “My car’s on fire! I need a fire extinguisher!”

Without even looking up, he replied, “Aisle 12.”

~~~

The airline was so cheap that instead of a movie, they put on a high school play.

~~~

She said: I’m writing you to let you know that I have recently been diagnosed with a serious condition and there’s little hope of getting over it. The scientific world is frantically searching for a cure. This is an ailment others also suffer from and may be undiagnosed. It’s called “Butfirst Syndrome.” It’s like when I decide to do the laundry – I start down the hall and notice the newspaper on the table. Okay, I’m going to do the laundry – Butfirst I’m going to read the newspaper. After that, I notice the mail on the table. Okay, I’ll just put the newspaper in the recycle stack, – Butfirst, I’ll look through that pile of mail and see if there are any bills to be paid. Now where’s the checkbook? Oops!

There’s the empty glass from yesterday on the coffee table. I’m going to look for that checkbook, – Butfirst I need to put the glass in the sink.

I head for the kitchen, look out the window, notice my poor flowers need a drink of water. I put the glass in the sink, and darn it, there’s the remote for the TV on the kitchen counter. What’s it doing here? I’ll just put it away, – Butfirst I need to water those plants. Head for door and Ack! Stepped on the dog, who needs to be fed. Okay, I’ll put that remote away and water the plants. – Butfirst I need to feed the dog. At the end of day; Laundry is not done, newspapers are still on the floor, glass is still in the sink, bills are unpaid, checkbook is still missing, and the dog ate the remote control. AND, when I try to figure out how come nothing got done all day, I’m baffled, because I KNOW I was BUSY ALL DAY! I realize this condition is serious…and I should get help. Butfirst I think I’ll read all my email!

~~~

“The trouble with jogging is that the ice falls out of your glass.”

Martin Mull

~~~

A New York family bought a ranch out west where they intended to raise cattle. Friends came to visit and asked if the ranch had a name.

“Well,” said the would-be-cattleman. I wanted to call it the Bar-J, my wife favored the Suzy-Q, one son liked the Flying-W, and the other son wanted the Lazy-Y. So, we’re calling it the Bar-J-Suzy-Q-Flying-W-Lazy-Y.”

“But, where are all your cattle?”

“So far, none have survived the branding.”

~~~

Many people will walk in and out of your life, but only true friends will leave footprints in your heart.

Eleanor Roosevelt

~~~

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at http://rays-daily,com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

 

 

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