Ray's musings and humor

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Ray’s Daily

February 4, 2020

http://rays-daily.com

“The most beautiful discovery true friends make is that they can grow separately without growing apart.”

Elisabeth Foley

friendship

I was reminded over the last few days of how much I value my past and current friends. I received hundreds of birthday greetings that unlocked a multitude of fond memories.

It truly were the friends and mentors who helped me succeed, not only in business but also in life. These days it is my new friends as well as my old friends who contribute so much to my happiness.

I heard somewhere that the secret of having good friends is to be one yourself. I know that is true with the best people I know. So my friends, thank you for the good life you have helped me have. Here is an excerpt from an article that I agree with, I hope you will as well.

What Is A Friend?

Author Unknown

Now, your idea of a good friend is still the person who gives you the better of the two choices, holds your hand when you’re scared, helps you fight off those who try to take advantage of you, thinks of you at times when you are not there, reminds you of what you have forgotten, helps you put the past behind you but understands when you need to hold on to it a little longer, stays with you so that you have confidence, goes out of their way to make time for you, helps you clear up your mistakes, helps you deal with pressure from others, smiles for you when they are sad, helps you become a better person, and most importantly loves you!

Pass this on to those friends of the past, and those of the future, and those you have met along the way… and remember… No matter where we go or who we become, never forget who helped us get there.

There’s never a wrong time to pick up a phone or send a message telling your friends how much you miss them.

You know who you are, pass it on to someone who you want to remind. And thank you for being a friend.

~~~

“A true friend never gets in your way unless you happen to be going down.”

Arnold H. Glasgow

~~~

I have a brother who was on a plane that had taken off and was approaching cruising altitude, when one of the flight attendants came on the public-address system. She announced that she was sorry, but the plane’s restroom was out of order. The flight attendant went on to apologize to the passengers for any inconvenience. But then she finished cheerily with: “So, as compensation, free drinks will be served.”

~~~

18 out of 10 schizophrenics agree.

~~~

I had purchased a talking metronome while I was attending a conference in New York for music teachers. Before my son and I boarded our flight home, I hefted my carry-on bag onto the security check conveyor belt. The guard’s eyes widened as he watched the monitor. He asked what I had in the bag, then slowly pulled out the six-by-three-inch black box covered with dials and switches. Other travelers, sensing trouble, vacated the area.

“A metronome,” I replied weakly, as my son cringed in embarrassment. “It’s a talking metronome,” I insisted. “Look, I’ll show you.”

I took the box and flipped a switch, realizing that I had no idea how it worked. “One, two, three, four,” it said.

Everyone breathed a sigh of relief.

As we gathered our belongings, my son whispered, “Aren’t you glad it didn’t go ‘four, three, two, one'”?

~~~

Success is simply a matter of luck. Ask any failure.

Earl Nightingale

~~~

Working in the Emergency Room here in our small rural community, we don’t get many calls, but they do tend to be memorable. One summer, a two-year-old boy was brought in with a cherry pit stuffed up his nostril. His mother said he was unable to blow it out and that when she tried using tweezers, it had only moved farther up into her son’s nose. I realized that the emergency equipment we had on hand was not suitable for the comfortable removal of the object from such a small patient, but I’d been taught early on in medical school that a paper clip bent to just the right angle and then curved slightly, could often be looped behind an object to help extract it. Finding a large clip, I bent it accordingly and managed to extract the cherry pit successfully.

The little boy’s mother looked at me and smiled. “That’s why we came to the hospital,” she explained, “So we could have access to all the modern, high-tech equipment.”

~~~

Ask me about my vow of silence.

~~~

Two mothers met for coffee. “Well Ruthie, how are the kids?

“To tell you the truth, my son has married a real tramp!” says Ruth. “She doesn’t get out of bed until 11. She’s out all day spending his money on Heaven knows what, and when he gets home, exhausted, does she have a nice hot dinner for him? Ha! She makes him take her out to dinner at an expensive restaurant.”

“Oh! What a shame. And how about your daughter?

“Ah! Now there’s a lucky girl. She has married a saint. He brings her breakfast in bed, he gives her enough money to buy whatever she needs, and in the evening he always takes her out to dinner at a nice restaurant.”

~~~

There is no exercise better for the heart than reaching down and lifting people up.

John Andrew Holmes

~~~

His aching back made it impossible for my friend’s husband to get a decent night’s rest on their lumpy mattress. “Until I feel better, I’m going to sleep on the couch,” he announced.

Ordinarily, a spouse moving out of the bedroom isn’t a good sign for the marriage. So his wife couldn’t resist: “Okay, but as soon as we have an argument you’re back in our bed.”

~~~

You can tell when a person is well informed: their views are pretty much like your own.

~~~

Doctor: “I see you’re over a month late for your appointment. Don’t you know that nervous disorders require prompt and regular attention? What’s your excuse”?

Patient: “I was just following your orders, Doc.”

Doctor: “Following my orders? What are you talking about? I gave you no such order.”

Patient: “You told me to avoid people who irritate me!”

~~~

I know what men want. Men want to be really, really close to someone who will leave them alone.

Elayne Boosler

~~~

A blonde was chatting with her building manager when she happened to mention that the tenants in the apartment above hers were awfully noisy. “Most nights, they stomp around up there as if they will killing cockroaches or something. All evening, this goes on, until around midnight.”

“That’s terrible,” said the building manager. “Do you want me to speak to them about it?”

“Oh, no, it’s not necessary,” said the blonde. “It doesn’t keep me up or anything, because, most nights, I usually stay up and practice my trumpet ’til about that time anyway.”

~~~

“If ever there is tomorrow when we’re not together… there is something you must always remember. You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. But the most important thing is, even if we’re apart… I’ll always be with you.”

Winnie the Pooh

~~~

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at http://rays-daily,com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

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