March 29, 2019
“To insure good health: eat lightly, breathe deeply, live moderately, cultivate cheerfulness, and maintain an interest in life.”
Years ago I asked friends to develop a program entitled, “What to do when there is nothing left to do on your Things To Do List”. Many of us find after we retire that a time comes when we find ourselves with little to do and we stand the chance of stagnating,
Mental and physical good health depends on our staying active. So we search for something to do. The other day Angel Chernoff published a list of options that I liked and I want to share some of her choices with you today.
Little Things You Should Start Making Time for Again
- It’s time to start taking better care of yourself again. –It’s your duty, and yours alone, to keep your inner light shining bright. So learn to love yourself first, instead of loving the idea of other people loving you.
- It’s time to start indulging in your passions and hobbies again. – Do fall in love, not always with a person, but with an aim, an ambition, a passion. Even if you can only dedicated 20 minutes a day to something you love, DO IT. No excuses, no regrets.
- It’s time to start spreading joy again. – BE the change you want to see. Love fearlessly and without limits. Smile, and help others smile too. If you don’t have the power or strength to write someone’s happiness, then try to help them remove their sadness instead.
- It’s time to start up quality conversations with loved ones again. –Relationships flourish when two people are able to share their innermost feelings and thoughts about themselves and each other.
- It’s time to start listening to others (without judgment) again. –Keep in mind that wisdom is not just knowing when to stand up and speak, but when to sit down quietly and listen.
- It’s time to start enjoying peaceful downtime again. – You deserve quiet moments away from the daily hustle, in which no problems are confronted, no solutions are explored, and no demands are being made of your time.
- It’s time to start reading good books again. – Books are truly the perfect entertainment: no advertisements, no batteries, hours of delight and education, and no cost with a library card.
- It’s time to start celebrating the small victories of each day again. – Sure, not every day will be good, but there will be something good about every day. Notice these things and celebrate them.
“If you have health, you probably will be happy, and if you have health and happiness, you have the wealthDon’t you need, even if it is not all you want.”
To make it possible for everyone to attend church on Sunday, we are proposing to have a special ‘No Excuse Sunday.’
- Cots will be placed in the foyer for those who say, ‘Sunday is my only day to sleep in.’
- They will have steel helmets for those who say, ‘The roof will cave in if I ever came to church.’
- Blankets will be furnished for those who say it is too cold and fans for those who say it is too hot.
4.There will be hearing aids for those who say, ‘The pastor speaks too softly,’ and cotton for those who say, ‘He preaches too loudly.’
5 Scorecards will be available for those who wish to list the hypocrites present.
- Some relatives will be in attendance for those who like to go visiting on Sunday.
- There will be TV dinners for those who can’t go to church and cook dinner too.
- Golf clubs will be available for practice swings for those who like to golf on Sunday.
Daddy, what does “Formatting Non-removable Disk” mean?
An Irishman, a Mexican and a blond guy were doing construction work on scaffolding on the 20th floor of a building.
They were eating lunch and the Irishman said, “Corned beef and cabbage. If I get corned beef and cabbage one more time for lunch I’m going to jump off this building.”
The Mexican opened his lunch box and exclaimed, “Burritos again! If I get burritos one more time I’m going to jump off, too.”
The blond opened his lunch and said, “Bologna again. If I get a bologna sandwich one more time, I’m jumping too.”
The next day the Irishman opened his lunch box, saw corned beef and cabbage and jumped to his death.
The Mexican opened his lunch, saw a burrito and jumped too.
The blond guy opened his lunch, saw the bologna and jumped to his death as well.
At the funeral the Irishman’s wife was weeping. She said, “If I’d known how really tired he was of corned beef and cabbage, I never would have given it to him again!”
The Mexican’s wife also wept and said, “I could have given him tacos or enchiladas! I didn’t realize he hated burritos so much.”
Everyone turned and stared at the blond’s wife. “Hey, don’t look at me,” she said, “He made his own lunch.”
JACK AND JILL Went up the hill to have a little fun.
Stupid Jill forgot the pill
And now they have a son.
The Catholic Church’s air conditioning broke down, so they had to hire a man to crawl around in the ducts and figure out what was wrong. As the man peeked down through one of the vents in the sanctuary, he saw little old Mrs. Murphy kneeling by the altar, apparently saying her rosary. Since the man was a fundamental Baptist, he thought it’d be funny to try and mess with the lady’s mind. In his best authoritative voice, he said, “This is Jesus. Your prayers will be answered.”
The little old lady didn’t even blink, just kept on saying her prayers. The man decided maybe she didn’t hear him, and tried again. “This is Jesus, the Son of God! Your prayers will be answered!” Again, she didn’t react at all. Mustering up a big breath of air, the man decided to try again. “THIS IS JESUS CHRIST, THE SON OF GOD! YOUR PRAYERS WILL BE ANSWERED!” The lady looks up and says, “SHUT UP! I’M TALKING TO YOUR MOTHER!”
“Health is a state of complete harmony of the body, mind and spirit. When one is free from physical disabilities and mental distractions, the gates of the soul open.”
Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.
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