Ray's musings and humor

Archive for August, 2018

More Trust, Less Fear

Ray’s Daily

August 22, 2018

www.rays-daily.com

“Life is a play. It’s not its length, but its performance that counts.”

Seneca

trust

Listening to the animosity expressed all round us these days makes me wonder if we are creating paranoia in the minds of our children. The political ads that abound are filled with inuendo and even falsehoods. The focus these days seems to be more on what is wrong with our fellow man and little about what is right.

It is as if many feel that everyone around them is a cheat and probably a crook. I have found long ago that I would rather have one person steal from me rather than treat everyone as if they would, and you know what? No one has.

I believe that most everyone I meet is a good person and it turns out that they almost always are. So my friends please give the folks you meet the benefit of doubt and when you do you will often find they are worth knowing. Here is a story about a Mom who jumped to the wrong conclusion.

Two Apples

A lovely little girl was holding two apples with both hands. Her mom came in and softly asked her little daughter with a smile: my sweetie, could you give your mom one of your two apples?

The girl looked up at her mom for some seconds, then she suddenly took a quick bite on one apple, and then quickly on the other. The mom felt the smile on her face freeze. She tried hard not to reveal her disappointment.

Then the little girl handed one of her bitten apples to her mom, and said: mommy, here you are. This is the sweeter one.

No matter who you are, how experienced you are, and how knowledgeable you think you are, always delay judgment. Give others the privilege to explain themselves. What you see may not be the reality. Never conclude for others.

~~~

The best way to find out if you can trust somebody is to trust them.

Ernest Hemingway

~~~

To Whom it May Concern:

I am hereby officially tendering my resignation as an adult. I have decided I would like to accept the responsibilities of an 8 year old again.

I want to go to McDonald’s and think that it’s a four star restaurant. I want to sail sticks across a fresh mud puddle and make ripples with rocks. I want to think M&Ms are better than money because you can eat them. I want to play dodgeball at recess and paint with watercolors in art. I want to lie under a big oak tree and run a lemonade stand with my friends on a hot summer’s day.

I want to return to a time when life was simple. When all you knew were colors, multiplication tables, and nursery rhymes, but that didn’t bother you, because you didn’t know what you didn’t know and you didn’t care. All you knew was to be happy because you were blissfully unaware of all the things that should make you worried or upset.

I want to think the world is fair. That everyone is honest and good. I want to believe that anything is possible. Somewhere in our youth, we matured and learned too much. There are nuclear weapons, war, prejudice, and abused children. Lies, unhappy marriages, illness, pain, and death. A world where companies poison our water and our soil, and children kill.

What happened to the time when we thought that everyone would live forever, because we didn’t grasp the concept of death? When the worst thing in the world was if someone took the jump rope from you or picked you last for kickball. I want to be oblivious to the complexities of life and be overly excited by the little things again.

I want to return to the days when children played hide-n-seek outside instead of being glued to a television, when video games were as harmless as Pac-Man…instead of spine-ripping, blood-splattering mind numbers like Mortal Combat, and TV still had some shows on that weren’t about sex, killing, and lies.

I remember being naive and thinking everyone was happy because I was. Afternoons were spent climbing trees and fences and riding my bike. I never worried about time, bills, or where I was going to find the money to fix my car. I used to wonder what I was going to do or be when I grew up, not worry about what I’ll do if this doesn’t work out. I want to live simple again.

I don’t want my day to consist of computer crashes, mountains of paperwork, depressing news, how to survive more days in the month than there is money in the bank, doctor bills, gossip, illness, and loss of loved ones. I want to believe in the power of smiles, hugs, a kind word, truth, justice, peace, dreams, the imagination, mankind, and making angels in the snow.

So…. here’s my checkbook and my car-keys, my credit card bills and my 401K statements. I am officially resigning from adulthood. And if you want to discuss this further, you’ll have to catch me first, ’cause. . .     “Tag! You’re it.”

~~~

Every man has three characters: that which he shows, that which he has, and that which he thinks he has.

Alphonse Karr

~~~

Sadie bumps into her friend Rachel at the mall. “You’re looking very tired today, Rachel. Did you have a late night?”

“Yes,” replies Rachel, “but it was all very strange. While doing some gardening yesterday, I found a lamp, so I rubbed it and out popped a genie. He gave me a choice of two wishes.”

“Wow, fantastic,” says Sadie, “so what were the choices he gave you, Rachel?”

“He said he could either give me an excellent, sharp, 100% memory or else he could make my Harry the best lover in the world.”

“So tell me already, Rachel, what did you choose?”

“I can’t remember,” replies Rachel.

~~~

People are more violently opposed to fur than to leather because it’s safer to harass rich women than motorcycle gangs.

~~~

An elderly lady was stopped to pull into a parking space when young man in his new red Mercedes went around her and parked in the space she was waiting for. The little old lady was so upset that she went up to the man and said, “I was going to park there!”

The man was a real smart aleck and he said, “That’s what you can do when you’re young and bright.”

Well, this really upset the lady even more, so she got in her car and backed it up and then she stomped on the gas and plowed right into his Mercedes.

The young man ran back to his car and screamed, “What did you do that for?”

She smiled and told him, “That’s what you can do when you’re old and rich!”

~~~

I truly believe that everything that we do and everyone that we meet is put in our path for a purpose. There are no accidents; we’re all teachers – if we’re willing to pay attention to the lessons we learn, trust our positive instincts and not be afraid to take risks or wait for some miracle to come knocking at our door.

Marla Gibbs

~~~

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at http://rays-daily,com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

Let’s Be Friends

Ray’s Daily

August 21, 2018

www.rays-daily.com

Take time to be friendly, It is the road to happiness. Take time to love and be loved, it is a privilege of the Gods. Take time to share, life is too short to be selfish.

Senora Roy

Be Friendly

I read an article written by Prakhar Verma yesterday reporting on the skills used by successful people. I think what he wrote is good advice for people like my wife and me as they move into a new environment. All of us benefit when we don’t hold ourselves back when we enter new social settings. One of the greatest rewards in life are the gifts of friendship that we are given when we sincerely care for others.

Here is an abridged copy of what Verma wrote.

5 Secrets Skills Of Highly Successful People That Has Nothing To Do With Talent

It’s true that some people have unique talents and genetic gifts that contribute to their success. But most successful people are not born genius. They are people like you and me who developed the two kinds of skills — industry-specific skills and emotional intelligence. Don’t believe me? Let’s take a closer look.

Secret #1: Self-Awareness – If you look on the internet, you will find a lot of people teaching you how to become self-aware. But you want to know the plain truth? No one can teach you to become self-aware. People may give you the tactics, but it’s only you who can teach yourself to become self-aware.

Secret #2: Self-Management – Self-awareness is the first step. But what do you do after that?

The ability to manage oneself is the next step in personal evolution. If you can’t manage yourself, you can’t run a business, give your best at work or be a good partner or parent.

Reading self-help books may help you gain knowledge, but to turn it into wisdom, you need to put down that book and do something with each lesson you learn.

Secret #3: Motivation – Self-motivation is the key to getting things done. Productivity hacks may work, but they are secondary. First, you must operate from your inner drives and develop intrinsic motivation to become unstoppable.

Benjamin P. Hardy is one of the top motivational writers who talks about the difference between pull and push motivation. He says: “Push motivation is rough. It’s exhausting, depleting, and requires constant willpower, which quickly burns-out. Pull motivation is much more powerful. It draws you forward, and actually gives you more energy while you’re doing it.” It requires a lot of digging before you find the rope that pulls you towards your goals. Emotionally intelligent people understand which rope to hold on to and which rope to let go of.

Secret #4: Empathy – All successful relationships and businesses are built on empathy. Empathy helps you connect with the other person on a level that most people never even come close to. If you want to excel on this planet (professionally or personally), you need empathy. And much like other “secrets”, it’s a skill you can develop. You don’t learn it just by reading more about it.

Secret #5: Social Skills – Whether you call it charm, charisma or likability; it’s the “luck” factor that most successful people have. I use the word “luck” because most people keep wondering why these people get all the opportunities while only they know that’s because of their relationships and their ability to communicate well.

Great social skills come from confident and confidence comes from great social skills. It’s a loop and you sure can enter it, but the only way is to put in the work to develop the skills. I don’t care if you call yourself an introvert or an extrovert, you can get better at this. Naturally, I am an introvert but I recognize that fact and I push myself to do the uncomfortable.

~~~

Lead the life that will make you kindly and friendly to everyone about you, and you will be surprised what a happy life you will lead.

Charles M. Schwab

~~~

As the storm began to rage, the absent minded blonde professor started outside when his wife stopped him, asking, “Hey, where do you think you’re going, George?”

“I’m going out to water the flowers,” replies the professor.

“But… dear, it’s raining outside!” replies his wife.

“You’re right,” says the professor, closing the door and now walking to the closet…..”I’d better take my umbrella.”

~~~

Make new friends and keep the old; one is silver, the other gold.

~~~

“Take a pencil and paper,” the teacher said, “and write an essay with the title ‘If I Were a Millionaire.’ ”

Everyone but Philip, who leaned back with arms folded, began to write furiously.

“What’s the matter,” the teacher asked. “Why don’t you begin?”

“I’m waiting for my secretary,” he replied.

~~~

“The reason grandchildren and grandparents get along so well is because they share a common enemy.”

Sam Levenson

~~~

A Catholic boy was bragging to his Jewish friend. “My priest knows more than your rabbi.”

“Of course he does,” said the Jewish boy. “You tell him everything.”

~~~

A friend of mine was visiting a college which had those security call boxes every few hundred feet.  If you were wandering around the campus at night and felt uneasy about somebody following you, for instance, you could hit the button and have a security officer investigate immediately.

On one of these phones hung a sign that said, “Out of Order.”

Underneath it someone had scrawled, “Keep Running.”

~~~

A careful study of economics usually reveals that the best time to buy anything is last year.

~~~

Rabbi Sam Wolfson was giving his speech to the Jewish federation about the ” Tragedy of Jewish Inter-Marriage ” with non-Jews. Toward the end of his long speech the Rabbi clapped his hands…waited 10 seconds…and clapped his hands again. The Rabbi then explained that every time he clapped his hands some Jew married a non-Jew.

Immediately Morris jumped up from his seat in the audience and shouted, “So Stop With Your Clapping!”

~~~

I implore you to see the universe as a warm and supportive one because you’ll look for evidence to support this view. When you anticipate that the universe is friendly, you see friendly people. You look for circumstances to work in your favor. You anticipate good fortune flowing into your life.

Wayne Dyer

~~~

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at http://rays-daily,com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

Don’t

Ray’s Daily

August 20, 2018

www.rays-daily.com

Don’t wait. The time will never be just right.

Napoleon Hill

Don't Wait

While both my wife and me regret leaving our home that has provided us so much pleasure it is the time to do so. The senior facility we are moving to will provide us a more comfortable existence and new friends. Too many folks wait too long, often finding themselves taken to a place they would rather not be.

I have found over the years that the best things in my life happened because I was not reluctant to take the next step. If I could only provide one piece of advice to the younger generation it would be, “Don’t Wait” for opportunity will not stop to allow you time to catch up.

Here is a story that I like and I hope you will too.

Dance Like No One’s Watching

by Crystal Boyd

We convince ourselves that life will be better after we get married, have a baby, then another. Then we’re frustrated that the kids aren’t old enough and we’ll be more content when they are. After that, we’re frustrated that we have teenagers to deal with. We’ll certainly be happy when they’re out of that stage.

We tell ourselves that our life will be complete when our spouse gets his or her act together, when we get a nicer car, are able to go on a nice vacation, when we retire.

The truth is, there’s no better time to be happy than right now. If not now, when?

Your life will always be filled with challenges. It’s best to admit this to yourself and decide to be happy anyway.

One of my favorite quotes comes from Alfred D. Souza. He said, “For a long time it had seemed to me that life was about to begin – real life. But there was always some obstacle in the way, something to be gotten through first, some unfinished business, time still to be served, or a debt to be paid. Then life would begin. At last it dawned on me that these obstacles were my life.”

This perspective has helped me to see that there is no way to happiness. Happiness is the way. So, treasure every moment that you have and treasure it more because you shared it with someone special, special enough to spend your time with…and remember that time waits for no one.

So, stop waiting until you finish school, until you go back to school, until you lose ten pounds, until you gain ten pounds, until you have kids, until your kids leave the house, until you start work, until you retire, until you get married, until you get divorced, until Friday night, until Sunday morning, until you get a new car or home, until your car or home is paid off, until spring, until summer, until fall, until winter, until you’re off welfare, until the first or fifteenth, until your song comes on, until you’ve had a drink, until you’ve sobered up, until you die, until you’re born again to decide that there is no better time than right now to be happy.

Happiness is a journey, not a destination.

~~~

“Don’t wait for what you don’t have. Use what you have, begin now and what you don’t even expect will come alongside with excess of what you expect. Go, make it happen.”

Israelmore Ayivor

~~~

A man stubbed his toe so badly he decided to go to the doctor. When he arrived at the office, the nurse directed him to remove his clothes and wait in the next room.

“I just hurt my toe,” complained the man. “Why do I need to take off my clothes?”

“Everyone who sees the doctor has to undress,” explained the nurse politely. “It’s our policy.”

“Well, I think it’s a stupid policy! Making me undress just to look at my toe! Geeez!”

From the next room another man’s voice piped up. . .

“That’s nothing! I just came here to fix the telephone!”

~~~

“If you can’t find the time to do it right the first time, when will you find the time to do it over?”

~~~

Morris realized he needed to purchase a hearing aid, but he felt unwilling to spend much money. “How much do they cost?” he asked the salesperson.

“That depends,” he said. “They run from $2.00 to $2,000.”

“Let’s see the $2.00 model,” said Morris the miser.

The salesperson put the device around Morris’ neck. “You just stick this button in your ear and run this little string down to your pocket,” he instructed.

“How does it work?” , asked Morris.

“For $2.00 it doesn’t work,” the salesperson replied. “But when people see it on you, they’ll talk louder.”

~~~

It is a miracle that curiosity survives formal education.

~~~

A woman was complaining to the neighbor that her husband always came home late, no matter how she tried to stop him.

“Take my advice,” said the neighbor, “and do what I did. Once my husband came home at three o’clock in the morning, and from my bed I called out: “Is that you, Jim?” And that cured him. “Cured him,” asked the woman, “but how?” The neighbor said, “You see, his name is Bill.”

~~~

Learn to enjoy every minute of your life. Be happy now. Don’t wait for something outside of yourself to make you happy in the future. Think how really precious is the time you have to spend, whether it’s at work or with your family. Every minute should be enjoyed and savored.

Earl Nightingale

~~~

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at http://rays-daily,com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

Now What?

Ray’s Daily

August 17, 2018

www.rays-daily.com

“The future is not a result of choices among alternative paths offered by the present, but a place that is created–created first in the mind and will, created next in activity…. The paths are not to be found, but made, and the activity of making them, changes both the maker and the destination.”

John Schaar

What;s Next

Our North Carolina visitors are on their way back home this morning, my wife’s birthday celebration is being interrupted for one day until another that is being hosted by friends tomorrow. Since I have roles to play I am going to send you a Daily from the past that I think still has merit.

Ray’s Daily first published on August 17, 2009

As the years go by I have learned that life is filled with unexpected twists and turns. Economic conditions change requiring adjustments in purchasing plans, vacations, and expensive entertainments. Health issues arise that limit our ability to perform as well as we had in the past. Life partners require more attention and, in some cases, pass on. Job loss, moves, children leaving the nest and so much more can throw us off stride. When we encounter roadblocks and detours some of us just stop and wait for the road to reopen which most times is a futile exercise, others find a different road and move on.

I often spend time with friends who are locked down allowing memories of past accomplishments that can no longer be replicated to block them from moving forward. They often sit in pain believing that their only hope is a miracle that will restore them to what they once were. What concerns me is that they miss so much that they could be doing that often would give them as much pleasure as other activities did in the past. One of the great gifts that life gives us is a lot more things to see, do and learn about than we could absorb in a hundred life times much less one.

I have had enough health and professional challenges to learn that taking a path I have never walked before provides exciting new opportunities, new friendships and added experiences that add to my capabilities. My heroes are the people who remember the good from the past, work to understand what they might do and then expand their horizons. I told a friend the other day that the limits his health has placed on his ability to perform athletically has freed up hours that I would love to have since I could use them to follow other pursuits that would add new meaning to my life.

I actually believe the blind can see; they see through the eyes of others who have left them great novels, reports of the wonders of the world and a wealth of knowledge. They have learned that their limitations open alternative ways to cope that can make up for what was missed. In fact in some respect the sightless see more than those who have isolated themselves within the walls of doing the same thing day, after day, after day…..

Bottom line some of us allow ourselves to be pushed into a rut by events and others of us just live in a rut all the time. Here is something that Michael Bungay Stanier wrote that may help if you if you would like to join with those of us who have decided to follow the yellow brick road to new adventures.

4 steps to find a new groove

Too often our ‘revealed preferences’ reveal a life that’s less than we imagine for ourselves. Follow this exercise and see if you can find a new groove.

  1. Scan your life and pick a general area where you feel you’ve got into a comfortable rut. There’s plenty of places to look: your role at work; a regular commitment you have to perform; your relationship with your partner, your boss, your kids, your parents; your idea of fun; how you maintain your heath; what you eat; your physical environment. Yep, it’s the whole life, full enchilada scan.
  2. Now that you’ve picked one of those areas, dig a little deeper. First step is to pick out what you really like, the things you don’t want to change. You might consider not changing: parts of your behavior; the people involved; the location; the ‘things’ – whatever ‘stuff’ is involved.
  3. Now you’re clear on what you want to keep the same, can you see one thing that you’d like to change? One person, one behavior, one element of the mix that you’d like to be new?
  4. Pick an action: get rid of it entirely; add something to it; remove something; rearrange it to a different position; do it in a different order; bring in something new; break the rules.

I’m not really asking you to rearrange your entire world here.  But perhaps it’s time to step out onto a new path.

~~~

“Where the old tracks are lost, new country is revealed with its wonders.”

Rabindranath Tagore

~~~

Bob meets Doug at the bar after his day at divorce court.

“Did the judge split everything fairly when he granted your wife a divorce?” asked Doug.

Bob replies, “Sort of. She got to keep the house, the car, the boat, the furniture and MY dog. I got to keep everything I was wearing.”

~~~

The value of a dog is its constant reminder of how much fun it is to act idiotic.

~~~

Now These Really Do Ring True!!

  • Law of Mechanical Repair – After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch.
  • Law of the Workshop – Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.
  • Law of the Telephone – When you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy Signal.
  • Law of the Alibi – If you tell the boss you were late for work because you Had a flat tire, the next morning you will have a flat Tire.
  • Variation Law – If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were In will start to move faster than the one you are in now. (works every time)
  • Bath Theorem – When the body is immersed in water, the telephone rings.
  • Law of Close Encounters – The probability of meeting someone you know increases When you are with someone you don’t want to be seen with.
  • Law of the Result – When you try to prove to someone that a machine won’t work, it will.
  • Law of Bio-mechanics – The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.
  • Theatre Rule – At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle arrive last
  • Law of Coffee – As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.
  • Murphy’s Law of Lockers – If there are only two people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.
  • Law of Dirty Rugs/Carpets – The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich of landing Face down on a floor covering are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet/rug.

~~~

If you can’t read this, you’re illiterate.

~~~

At the end of the college year, a star football player celebrated the relaxation of team curfew by attending a late night campus party. Soon after arriving, he became captivated by a beautiful young thing and eased into a conversation with her by asking if she met many dates at parties.

“Oh, I have a 3.9, so I’m much more attracted to the strong academic types than to dumb party animals,” she said. “What’s your G.P.A.?”

Grinning from ear to ear, the jock boasted, “I get about 27 in the city and 38 on the highway.

~~~

It is not a lucky word, this “impossible”; no good comes of those who have it so often in their mouth.

Thomas Carlyle

~~~

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at http://rays-daily,com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

Get Happy

Ray’s Daily

August 16, 2018

www.rays-daily.com

“Doing what you like is freedom. Liking what you do is happiness.”

Frank Tyger

Stay Happy

Today is my wife’s birthday and my family is going to make it special. Next year we will celebrating her day in our new residence, We are adjusting to the changes in our lives with positive attitudes. When I read the following article, I had to edit it for space, by Travis Bradberry it reminded me of how important it is to eliminate the barriers to happiness in our lives.

9 traps you fall into that limit your happiness

Some habits lead to unhappiness more than others do. These traps are easily avoided once you’re aware of them.

Holding your feelings in – One of the great misconceptions concerning emotional intelligence (EQ) is that it is about repressing our feelings and holding them in. Emotional intelligence means honoring your feelings and allowing yourself to experience the catharsis that comes from embracing them for what they are.

Numbing yourself with technology – Everyone deserves the opportunity to binge-watch a TV show now and then or to switch on your Kindle and get lost in a book. When your escape becomes a constant source of distraction, it is a sure sign you have fallen into the trap of too much of a good thing.

Spending too much time and effort acquiring “things” – There’s an ocean of research that shows that material things don’t make you happy. When you make a habit of chasing things, you are likely to become unhappy because, beyond the disappointment you experience once you get them, you discover that you’ve gained them at the expense of the real things that can make you happy, such as friends, family, and hobbies.

Waiting for the future – Telling yourself, “I’ll be happy when … ” is one of the easiest unhappy habits to fall into. Don’t spend your time waiting for something that’s proven to have no effect on your mood. Instead focus on being happy right now, in the present moment, because there’s no guarantee of the future.

Fighting change – Change is an inevitable part of life, and those who fight it do so because they are struggling to remain in control. The problem with this approach is that fighting change actually limits your control over the situation by putting up a barrier between yourself and the actions you need to take to improve your situation.

Pessimism – Nothing fuels unhappiness quite like pessimism. The problem with a pessimistic attitude, beyond it being hard on your mood, is that it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy: if you expect bad things, you’re more likely to get bad things.

Trying to keep up with the Joneses – Jealousy and envy are incompatible with happiness, so if you’re constantly comparing yourself with others, it’s time to stop. Be wary of this kind of thinking as it won’t make you happy and, more often than not, has the opposite effect.

Not improving

Staying home – When you feel unhappy, it’s tempting to avoid other people. This is a huge mistake as socializing, even when you don’t enjoy it, is great for your mood. Recognize when unhappiness is making you antisocial, force yourself to get out there and mingle, and you’ll notice the difference right away.

Bringing it all together – Changing your habits in the name of greater happiness is one of the best things that you can do for yourself. But it’s also important for another reason — taking control of your happiness makes everyone around you happier.

~~~

To stay happy, we must stop complaining about the troubles we have and learn to be thankful for the troubles we don’t have.

~~~

FATAL THINGS TO SAY IF YOUR WIFE IS PREGNANT

“I finished the Oreos.”

“Not to imply anything, but I  don’t think the kid weighs forty pounds.”

“Y’know, looking at her, you’d never guess that Pamela Lee had a baby.”

“I sure hope your thighs aren’t gonna stay like that!”

“Well, couldn’t they induce labour? The 25th is the Super Bowl.”

“Are your ankles supposed to look like that?”

“Get your own ice cream.”

~~~

“In three words I can sum up everything I’ve learned about life. It goes on.”

Robert Frost

~~~

Jolene had been wanting new kitchen cabinets for a long time, but her husband insisted they were an extravagance. She went to visit her Mother for two weeks, and when she returned, she was overjoyed to find that beautiful new cabinets had been installed.

A few days later a neighbor came over to visit and after admiring the new cabinets, the neighbor added, “All of us were so glad that the fire your husband had while you were gone was confined to the kitchen.”

~~~

True friends are those who really know you but love you anyway.

Edna Buchanan

~~~

“So,” the woman asked the detective she had hired, “did you trail my husband?”

“Yes ma’am. I did. I followed him to a bar, to an out of the way restaurant and then to an apartment.”

A big smile crossed the woman’s face, “Aha!! Then I’ve got him!” she said, gloating.” Is there any doubt what he was doing?”

“No ma’am.” replied the sleuth, “It’s pretty clear that he was following you!”

~~~

“Everybody needs his memories. They keep the wolf of insignificance from the door.”

Saul Bellow

~~~

Early in their marriage, the old perfesser did something really stupid. Doesn’t matter what it was, for the sake of this story, just trust me… it was stupid.

Mrs Perfesser chewed him out for it. Knowing it was really dumb, he sensibly apologized, and they made up.

However, from time to time, Mrs Perfesser reminds him what a dolt he had been on that occasion.

“Honey,” the old perfesser finally said one day, “why do you keep bringing that up? I thought your policy was ‘forgive and forget’?”

“It is,” said Mrs Perfesser. “I just don’t want you to forget that I’ve forgiven and forgotten.”

~~~

You’re only young once, but you can be immature forever.

John Greier

~~~

Miss Figpot was quizzing her third-grade students on their spelling words.  She asked Little Johnny to spell “straight.”  Johnny did so without error.

“Now,” said the teacher, “what does it mean?”

Johnny replied, “Without water.”

~~~

“Life is a journey, and if you fall in love with the journey, you will be in love forever.”

Peter Hagerty

~~~

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at http://rays-daily,com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

Leave the baggage behind

Ray’s Daily

August 15, 2018

www.rays-daily.com

“Don’t waste your time in anger, regrets, worries, and grudges. Life is too short to be unhappy.”

Roy T. Bennett

Worry Free

At lunch yesterday a friend and me discussed what we need to do to free ourselves up in order to take advantage of future opportunity. She mentioned how much she and her significant others enjoyed a recent cruise, She said just leaving behind all their cares and concerns for a few days was invigorating. I think she was reporting how much our lives would be better if we treated all our days as if we left our worries on the dock as we ventured out on our search for happiness.

Our conversation reminded me of a recent article posted on the Positively Present blog. Here is an edited version of the piece.

 5 Types of Baggage You Don’t Need to Carry

Just as we’ve all likely accumulated a wide variety of knickknacks, we all carry a unique set of emotional luggage. Sorting through it all is an individual experience; it’s something we each have to do for ourselves, in our own time. But I thought this week I’d talk a little bit about five kinds of emotional baggage many of us are carrying around — suitcases of inner burdens that make each of our paths a little bit more difficult to travel.

YOUR PAST – The first bag we could all benefit from setting down is the past. Yes, there’s value in remembering what’s happened so that you can learn from it, but dragging it around with you doesn’t serve much purpose. Like it or not, the past is over. What’s done is done, and you cannot go back (no matter how much you might want to at times!).

NEGATIVITY – The next load of luggage we need to set down is a negative attitude. For many of us negativity feels like safety. Imaging what could go wrong (or noticing what is going wrong) can feel like a form of self-protection, a way to cope with (or potentially prevent) bad things in life. But focusing on the negative aspects of life is like lugging around a bag of rocks while trudging up a mountain — all it does is make your journey more difficult.

GUILT – The concept of guilt is closely tied with the past, but it’s not quite the same. Even if you’ve done your best to let the past go, you might still cling to guilt, feeling as if you deserve to lug around the blame for something that’s happened, even when you know it cannot be undone. Guilt is a waste of time, and what is life, really, but doing what we can to make the most of the time we’ve been given.

EXPECTATIONS – Letting go of expectations is essential if you want to carry around less weight. Expectations (both of ourselves and of others) often lead to a lot of stress and strife, and quite frequently you don’t even realize how much they weigh you down. They might seem like something beneficial — guidelines that should you what you do and don’t want — but they are heavy. It’s not until you begin setting them down that you realize down cumbersome they are.

OTHERS’ MISTAKES – Finally, something many of us carry around that we really need to set down? Others’ mistakes. The past of others might not seem like something you’re carrying, but you’re likely doing so without realizing it. Whether it’s parents, siblings, colleagues, friends, or children, many of us drag around the weight of what others have done (either because we feel partly responsible for it or because we’ve been hurt by it), and, just as with our own pasts, the pasts of others cannot be undone. Do yourself a favor and set that extra weight down!.

Setting down one (or all!) of these things is no easy feat, but the effort it takes is so worth it. Life is a tough climb sometimes and lugging around extra weight only makes the ascent more difficult. These five types of baggage are the first that came to my mind, but I’d love to know: what else would you like to set down?

~~~

“If you want to be happy, do not dwell in the past, do not worry about the future, focus on living fully in the present.”

Roy T. Bennett,

~~~

Cowboy: “Well, I suppose you’ve been alright.  You’ve been a decent horse, I guess.  A bit slow sometimes, but a decent horse, and…”

Horse: “No, you stupid idiot I didn’t ask you for FEEDBACK!  I said that I wanted my FEEDBAG!”

~~~

If you obey all the rules you miss all the fun.

Katherine Hepburn

~~~

Three sisters, ages 92, 94, and 96 live in a house together. One night the 96 year old draws a bath. She puts one foot in and pauses. She yells down the stairs, “Was I getting in or out of the bath?” The 94 year old yells back, “I don’t know. I’ll come up and see.” She starts up the stairs and pauses. Then, she yells, “Was I going up the stairs or down?” The 92 year old is sitting at the kitchen table having tea, listening to her sisters. She shakes her head and says, “I sure hope I never get that forgetful.” She knocks on wood for good measure. She then yells, “I’ll come up and help both of you as soon as I see who’s at the door.”

~~~

You have to be careful about being too careful.

Beryl Pfizer

~~~

Mary was having a tough day and had stretched herself out on the couch to do a bit of what she thought to be well-deserved complaining and self-pitying.

She moaned to her mom and brother, “Nobody loves me.  The whole world hates me!”

Her brother, busily occupied playing a game, hardly looked up at her and passed on this encouraging word: “That’s not true, Mary. Lots of people don’t even know you.”

~~~

“There are 10 kinds of people: those who understand binary and those who don’t.”

~~~

This woman’s husband dies and she has only $20,000 to her name. After everything is done at the funeral home and cemetery, she tells her closest friend that she has no money left.

The friend says, “How can that be? You told me you still had $20,000 left just a few days before your husband died. How could you be broke?”

The widow says, “Well, the funeral home cost me $5,000. And of course I had to make the obligatory donation to the temple, so that was another $5,000. The rest went for the memorial stone.”

The friend says, “$10,000 for the memorial stone? My goodness, how big was it?”

Extending her left hand, the widow says, “Three carats.”

~~~

“More smiling, less worrying. More compassion, less judgment. More blessed, less stressed. More love, less hate.”

Roy T. Bennett

~~~

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at http://rays-daily,com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

No Time For Worry

Ray’s Daily

August 14, 2018

www.rays-daily.com

Drama free, worry free. That’s the way I wanna be.

Don;t worry

This past weekend my oldest daughter came and helped me continue my downsizing effort. This time we focused on coats, jackets, winter garb and some of my huge collection of polo shirts. Great leather jackets and lighter jackets that were loaded with memories all ended up in the to be donated pile.

What surprised me was how good I felt about selecting only what I would use in the years ahead. Instead of mourning the loss of days past, I found myself excited about the days ahead lightened by not taking more than I need.

Yesterday I read the following article written by Marc Chernoff that I liked. It reminded me that at the moment I have set worry aside making room for positive thoughts about the future.

The Weight of the Glass

Twenty years ago, when Angel and I were just undergrads in college, our psychology professor taught us a lesson we’ve never forgotten.  On the last day of class before graduation, she walked up on stage to teach one final lesson, which she called “a vital lesson on the power of perspective and mindset.”  As she raised a glass of water over her head, everyone expected her to mention the typical “glass half empty or glass half full” metaphor.  Instead, with a smile on her face, our professor asked, “How heavy is this glass of water I’m holding?”

Students shouted out answers ranging from a couple of ounces to a couple of pounds.

After a few moments of fielding answers and nodding her head, she replied, “From my perspective, the absolute weight of this glass is irrelevant. It all depends on how long I hold it.  If I hold it for a minute or two, it’s fairly light.  If I hold it for an hour straight, its weight might make my arm ache.  If I hold it for a day straight, my arm will likely cramp up and feel completely numb and paralyzed, forcing me to drop the glass to the floor. In each case, the absolute weight of the glass doesn’t change, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it feels to me.”

As most of us students nodded our heads in agreement, she continued.  “Your worries, frustrations, disappointments, and stressful thoughts are very much like this glass of water.  Think about them for a little while and nothing drastic happens.  Think about them a bit longer and you begin to feel noticeable pain.  Think about them all day long, and you will feel completely numb and paralyzed, incapable of doing anything else until you drop them.”

~~~

“Worry never robs tomorrow of its sorrow, it only saps today of its joy.”

Leo F. Buscaglia

~~~

She said:

  1. The Female always makes THE RULES.
  2. THE RULES are subject to change at any time without prior notification.
  3. No Male can possibly know all THE RULES.
  4. If the Female suspects the Male knows all THE RULES she must immediately change some or all of THE RULES.
  5. The Female is never wrong.
  6. If the Female is wrong, it is due to a misunderstanding that was a direct result of something the Male did or said wrong.
  7. The Male must apologize immediately for causing said misunderstanding.
  8. The Female may change her mind at any time.
  9. The Male must never change his mind without the express written consent of the Female.
  10. The Female has every right to be angry or upset at any time.
  11. The Male must remain calm at all times unless the Female wants him to be angry and/or upset.
  12. The Female must under no circumstances let the Male know whether she wants him to be angry and/or upset.
  13. The Male is expected to be adept at mind reading.
  14. The Female is ready when she is ready.
  15. The Male must be ready at all times.
  16. Any attempt to document THE RULES could result in bodily harm to the Male.
  17. The Male who doesn’t abide by THE RULES can’t take the heat, lacks backbone and is a wimp.

~~~

“Osborne’s Law”

Variables won’t; constants aren’t.

~~~

Morris needs a lawyer, so he grabs the yellow pages and picks out a law firm — Schwartz, Schwartz, Schwartz & Schwartz.

He calls up and says, “Is Mr. Schwartz in?”

The man says, “No, he’s out playing golf.”

Morris says, “All right, then let me speak to Mr. Schwartz.”

“He’s not with the firm any more, he’s retired.”

“Then let me talk to Mr. Schwartz.”

“He’s away in Boston, won’t be back for a month.”

“Okay, then let me talk to the other Mr. Schwartz.”

He says, “Speaking!”

~~~

Living on Earth is expensive, but it does include a free trip around the sun.

~~~

The kid said don’t get me sick:

When you go home, you have to stay all alone.

You have to stay in bed and not get fed.

You miss out on all the fun that’s it, you’re done.

So when you sneeze cover your mouth please!!!

Madison F. age 9

~~~

WHY MEN AREN’T GOOD SECRETARIES

Husband’s note to his wife…”Doctor’s office called: Said Pabst beer is normal.”

~~~

An English professor announced to the class; “There are two words I don’t allow in my class. One is gross and the other is cool.”

From the back of the room a voice called out, “So, what are the words?

~~~

Remember the five simple rules to be happy: Free your heart from hatred. Free your mind from worries. Live simply. Give more. Expect less.

Nishan Panwar

~~~

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at http://rays-daily,com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

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