Ray's musings and humor

Archive for February, 2018

Have you?

Ray’s Daily

February 14, 2018

www.rays-daily.com

Strive not to be a success, but rather to be of value.

Albert Einstein

Don't Stumble

I just learned that an old friend who has spent many years serving others was just the victim of a reorganization that eliminated his position. He has given much to many over the years and always has done it with style and grace.

Many of us would find only bitterness in the reality that we would have to start again. My friend only shared with me how much he appreciated having had the opportunity to serve others for as many years as he has so far. I expect that in the years ahead he will continue to be the bright star that he is now.

I have always liked the following poem and today it reminded me of my friend as he always has earned his tomorrow and I am sure will continue to do so.

Have You Earned Your Tomorrow

Edgar Guest

 Is anybody happier because you passed his way?

Does anyone remember that you spoke to him today?

This day is almost over, and its toiling time is through;

Is there anyone to utter now a kindly word of you?

 

Did you give a cheerful greeting to the friend who came along?

Or a churlish sort of “Howdy” and then vanish in the throng?

Were you selfish pure and simple as you rushed along the way,

Or is someone mighty grateful for a deed you did today?

 

Can you say tonight, in parting with the day that’s slipping fast,

That you helped a single brother of the many that you passed?

Is a single heart rejoicing over what you did or said;

Does a man whose hopes were fading now with courage look ahead?

 

Did you waste the day, or lose it, was it well or sorely spent?

Did you leave a trail of kindness or a scar of discontent?

As you close your eyes in slumber do you think that God would say,

You have earned one more tomorrow by the work you did today?

~~~

To handle yourself, use your head; to handle others, use your heart.

Eleanor Roosevelt

~~~

After Sunday service a young couple talked to the pastor about joining the church. He hadn’t met the husband before, so he asked what church he was transferring from.

The husband looked down at his feet and replied, “I am transferring from the Municipal Golf Course.”

~~~

“The follies which a man regrets most, in his life, are those which he didn’t commit when he had the opportunity.”

Helen Rowland

~~~

A guy’s wife and kids all came down with the flu. Upon returning home from the pediatrician’s office with his four kids, he turned his attention to his ailing wife.

After preparing some chicken soup for her, he picked up the phone to call her doctor.

The receptionist picked up and he related the situation to her. She then told him that the office was going to be closed for a couple of days, but that his wife could have an appointment in 3 days.

He went ballistic and yelled into the phone, “Three days?! The doctor can’t see her for three days?!  She could be dead by then!”

Calmly the voice at the other end of the line replied, “If so, would you please call to cancel the appointment?”

~~~

If the left side of your brain controls the right side of your body, then only left-handed people are in their right mind.

~~~

While working for an organization that delivers lunches to elderly shut-ins, I used to take my 4- year-old daughter on my afternoon rounds. The various appliances of old age, particularly the canes, walkers and wheelchairs, unfailingly intrigued her. One day I found her staring at a pair of false teeth soaking in a glass. As I braced myself for the inevitable barrage of questions, she merely turned and whispered, “The tooth fairy will never believe this!”

~~~

I just can’t win with my wife. She doesn’t like my hours, she doesn’t like my hobbies, she doesn’t even like my girlfriends.

~~~

An Amish man answered a knock on his door one morning.  An electric company worker handed him a piece of paper stating that the electric company would like to run a power line through his pasture.  The Amish man said, “No!”

“Legally, that paper says we can.” replied the worker.

As the worker turned and left, returning to his co-workers in the field, the Amish man went to his barn and turned his bull into the pasture.

As the bull rumbled toward the workers in the field, the Amish man hollers, “Show HIM your paper!”

~~~

A truly rich man is one whose children run into his arms when his hands are empty.

Unknown

~~~

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at http://rays-daily,com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

Advertisement

Never give up

Ray’s Daily

February 13, 2018

www.rays-daily.com

“The only person you should try to be better than is the person you were yesterday.”

don't give up.

I got e-mail yesterday from an old friend who reminded me of past good times and how our lives change. The message brought back many fond memories of my traveling days and the special folks I met along the way.

Time takes its toll as we continue our life’s journey. I have found there is little use in spending time agonizing over what can no longer be. It is far too easy to just stop and whither, letting our longing for the past take us down. We all have the capability of enriching our current lives if we are willing to embrace what is still left for us to explore and discover.

Some time ago Marc Chernoff sent his thoughts on why so many of is stagnate. Here is an excerpt from his article that rings true to me.

Should haves, would haves and could haves…

As Thich Nhat Hanh so perfectly said, “People have a hard time letting go of their suffering.  Out of a fear of the unknown, they prefer suffering that is familiar.”

In many cases you stay stuck in your old routines for no other reason than that they are familiar to you.  In other words, you’re afraid of change and the unknown.  You continually put your dreams and goals off until tomorrow, and you pass on great opportunities simply because they have the potential to lead you out of your comfort zone.

You start using excuses to justify your lack of backbone:  “Someday when I have more money,” or “when I’m older,” or the over-abused “I’ll get to it as soon as I have more time.”  This is a vicious cycle that leads to a deeply unsatisfying life – a way of thinking that eventually sends you to your grave with immense regret.  Regret that you didn’t follow your heart.  Regret that you always put everyone else’s needs before your own.  Regret that you didn’t do what you could have done when you had the chance.

So how do you prevent regretting all the potential should haves, would haves and could haves?

Simple.  Forget the past.  Forget what you can’t change.  Today is the first day of the rest of your life.  From this point on, let there be no excuses, no explanations and no regrets.  Start from where you are right now, break free from your cage of comfort and take a bold step forward.

~~~

“I can be changed by what happens to me but I refuse to be reduced by it.”

Maya Angelou

~~~

She wrote: My husband Jeff and I incurred several problems while assembling our new computer system, so we called the help desk. The man on the phone started to talk to Jeff in computer jargon, which confused us even more.

“Sir,” my husband politely said, “please explain what I should do as if I were a four-year-old.” “Okay,” the computer technician replied. “Son, could you please put your mommy on the phone?”

~~~

“To find out a girl’s faults, praise her to her girl friends.”

Benjamin Franklin

~~~

When the wise company president learned that his employees were tanking up on no-trace vodka martinis during their lunch hours, he issued the following memo: To all employees; If you must drink during you lunch hours, please drink whiskey. It is better for our customers to know you’re drunk than to think you’re stupid.

~~~

“If one sticks too rigidly to one’s principles, one would hardly see anybody.”

Agatha Christie

~~~

Nights in England are coal black, making parachute jumps difficult.  We attach small lights called chemlites to make our jumpsuits visible to the rest of the team. Late one night, lost after a practice jump, we knocked at the door of a small cottage.  When a woman answered, she was greeted by the sight of five men festooned in glowing chemlites.

“Excuse me,” I said, “Can you tell us where we are?”

In a thick English accent, the woman replied, “Earth.”

~~~

How Many Roads Must A Man Travel Down Before He Admits He Is Lost?

~~~

A shoplifter was caught red-handed trying to steal a watch from an exclusive jewelry store. “Listen,” said the shoplifter, “I know you don’t want any trouble either. What do you say I just buy the watch and we forget about this?”

The manager agreed and wrote up the sales slip. The crook looked at the slip and said, “This is a little more than I intended to spend. Can you show me something less expensive?”

~~~

I’ve Gone to Find Myself. If I Get Back Before I’ve Found Me, Please Keep Me Here

~~~

As you know from some of my previous daily’s that the following is true for me, I hope not for you, or at least not yet.

Even the most advanced programs from Norton or McAfee cannot take care of this one. It appears to affect those who were born prior to 1950.

Symptoms:

  1. Causes you to send the same e-mail twice.
  2. Causes you to send a blank e-mail.
  3. Causes you to send e-mail to the wrong person.
  4. Causes you to send it back to the person who sent it to you.
  5. Causes you to forget to attach the attachment.
  6. Causes you to hit “SEND” before you’ve finished.
  7. Causes you to hit “DELETE” instead of “SEND.”
  8. Causes you to hit “SEND” when you should “DELETE.”

IT IS CALLED THE “C-NILE VIRUS.”

~~~

“Plant your garden and decorate your own soul, instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers.”

Jose Luis Borges

~~~

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at http://rays-daily,com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

Just the truth please

Ray’s Daily

February 12, 2018

www.rays-daily.com

Respect for the truth comes close to being the basis for all morality.

Frank Herbert

Respect Ethics Honest Integrity Signpost Meaning Good Qualities

I hope things are going well for you. I am about to try to resume a more normal life after almost a month of recovering from my rib injury. So I will gradually get back.

If you are like I am you are distressed by how much time is spent attacking others with half-truths and even falsehoods. It seems like the effort to destroy others has many who feel that the ends justify the means even if the means are false creations. I liked it when we were better than that.

Here is a story I picked up some time ago that I would offer to the muckrakers and mudslingers.

The Triple-Filter Test

In ancient Greece, Socrates was reputed to hold knowledge in high esteem. One day an acquaintance met the great philosopher and said, “Do you know what I just heard about your friend?”

“Hold on a minute,” Socrates replied. “Before you talk to me about my friend, it might be good idea to take a moment and filter what you’re going to say. That’s why I call it the triple filter test. The first filter is Truth. Have you made absolutely sure that what you are about to tell me is true?”

“Well, no,” the man said, “actually I just heard about it and…”

“All right,” said Socrates. “So you don’t really know if it’s true or not. Now, let’s try the second filter, the filter of Goodness. Is what you are about to tell me about my friend something good?”

“Umm, no, on the contrary…”

“So,” Socrates continued, “you want to tell me something bad about my friend, but you’re not certain it’s true. You may still pass the test though, because there’s one filter left—the filter of Usefulness. Is what you want to tell me about my friend going to be useful to me?”

“No, not really.”

“Well,” concluded Socrates, “if what you want to tell me is neither true, nor good, nor even useful, why tell it to me at all?”

~~~

It is better to be hated for what you are than to be loved for what you are not.

Andre Gide

~~~

Irving took Harry to a celebratory dinner at a really posh restaurant.

They walked in, were ushered to a table by a formally dressed host and sat down at a table on which were displayed the finest china and crystal. Taking the damask napkin from the solid silver napkin ring, Harry unfolded it, put it around his neck and proceeded to tie a knot in the back.

Staring at him, the host said, between gritted teeth, “Sir, will you be having a shave or a haircut?”

~~~

It rarely occurs to teenagers that the day will come when they’ll know as little as their parents.

~~~

A woman was chatting with her next-door neighbor. “I feel really good today. I started out this morning with an act of unselfish generosity. I gave a five dollar bill to a bum.”

“You gave a bum five whole dollars? That’s a lot of money to just give away. What did you husband say about it?”

“Oh, he thought it was the proper thing to do. He said, ‘Thanks.’ ”

~~~

“I Used to Have a Handle on Life, but It Broke”

~~~

Two cab drivers were waiting for fares in front of a downtown hotel.

“Hey,” asked one, “why did you paint one side of your cab red and the other side blue?”

“Well,” the other responded, “when I get into an accident, you should see how all the witnesses contradict each other.”

~~~

The art of being wise is the art of knowing what to overlook.

William James

~~~

The pilot was sitting in his seat and pulled out a .38 revolver. He placed it on top of the instrument panel, then asked the navigator, “Do you know what I use this for?”

The nav replied timidly, “No, what’s it for?”

The pilot responded, “I use this on navigators who get me lost!”

The navigator proceeded to pull out a .45 and place it on his chart table.

The pilot asked, “What’s that for?”

“To be honest sir,” the nav replied, “I’ll know we’re lost before you will.”

~~~

I think someone should invent Beerguard, because how often do you actually spill Scotch on the carpet?

~~~

After many years, a young Jewish Talmud student who had left the old country for America returns to visit the family.

“But–where is your beard?” asks his mother upon seeing him.

“Mama,” he replies, “In America, nobody wears a beard.”

“But at least you keep the Sabbath?”

“Mama, business is business. In America, everybody works on the Sabbath.”

“But kosher food you still eat?”

“Mama, in America, it is very difficult to keep kosher.”

The old lady ponders this information and then leans over and whispers in his ear, “Isaac, tell me you’re still circumcised?”

~~~

“When your dad is mad and asks you, ‘Do I look stupid?’ don’t answer him.”

Heather, age 16

~~~

“Dana,” asked Kim thoughtfully one day, “what would you do if you caught another woman in bed with your husband?”

“With Jack?”  Dana thought it over.  “Let’s see; I’d break her cane, shoot her guide dog, and call a cab to take her back to the institution she escaped from.

~~~

If you once forfeit the confidence of your fellow citizens, you can never regain their respect and esteem. It is true that you may fool all of the people some of the time; you can even fool some of the people all of the time; but you can’t fool all of the people all of the time.

Abraham Lincoln

~~~

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at http://rays-daily,com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

 

Keep an open mind

Ray’s Daily

February 9, 2018

“When you judge others, you do not define them, you define yourself”

Earl Nightingale

Judge Less

I ventured out yesterday to do a few errands and found that I still have to take it slow, but at least I did something. Next week I will attend a few events I just hope the weather makes driving practical, I can’t rely on others for transportation forever.

As you know I believe everyone we meet is a potential friend but that only is possible if we keep an open mind and don’t make snap judgements. I would hate to miss a friendship because I failed to get to know someone. Recently Mark Chernoff published Quotes to Change How You See & Treat People I have listed his list below. I think it is well worth your time.

Change How You See & Treat People

1.Everybody you meet is afraid of something, loves something, and has lost something.  Know this.  You never know what someone has been through, or what they’re going through today.  Don’t be lazy and make empty judgments about them.  Be kind.  Ask about their stories.  Listen.  Be humble.  Be teachable.  Be a good neighbor.

2.Some people build lots of walls in their lives and not enough bridges.  Don’t be one of them.  Open yourself up.  Take small chances on people.  Let them shift your perspective.  We all take different roads seeking fulfillment, joy, and peace.  Just because someone is traveling a different road, doesn’t mean they’re lost or going the wrong way.

3.No one has ever made themselves strong by showing how small someone else is.  Remember this, and communicate accordingly.

4.The single greatest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place.  Too often we don’t listen to understand—we listen to reply.  Bring awareness to this.  And listen for what’s truly behind the words.

5.Be present.  Be thoughtful.  Compliment people.  Magnify their strengths, not their weaknesses.  This is how to make a real and lasting difference in your relationships, new and old.

6.Set an example.  Treat everyone with respect, even those who are rude to you—not because they are nice, but because YOU are.  And do your best to be thankful for the rude and difficult people too; they serve as great reminders of how not to be.

7.People will rarely think and act exactly the way you want them to.  Hope for the best, but expect less.  Agree to disagree when necessary.  And be careful not to dehumanize those you disagree with.  In our self-righteousness, we can easily become the very things we dislike in others.

8.People are much nicer when they’re happier, which says a lot about those who aren’t very nice to us.  Sad, but true.  The way we treat people we disagree with is a report card on what we’ve learned about love, compassion and kindness.  Let’s just wish them well, and be on our way.

9.You can’t control how people receive your energy.  And you can’t take things too personally, even if it seems personal.  Rarely do people do things because of you.  They do things because of them.  There is a huge amount of freedom that comes to when you detach from other people’s behaviors.  The way they treat you is their issue, how you respond is yours.  (We discuss this in more detail in the “Relationships” chapter of our book.)

10.The wisest, most loving, and well-rounded people you have ever met are likely those who have been shattered by some kind of heartbreak.  Yes, life often creates the best humans by breaking them first.  Their destruction into pieces allows them to be fine-tuned and reconstructed into a masterpiece.  Let this continue to remind you to be way kinder than necessary, every step of the way.

~~~

Watch out for the joy-stealers: gossip, criticism, complaining, faultfinding, and a negative, judgmental attitude.

Joyce Meyer

~~~

Drew and Timmy were brothers. One day Mom and Dad had to go into town. Dad told Drew, “While we are gone I want you boys to clear away the dirty dishes, clean your room, and mow the grass.”

When they returned nothing had been done. Dad was very upset. He asked Drew, “What have you been doing while we were gone?”

Drew replied in a low voice, “Nothing.”

Dad then turns to Timmy and asks, “What have you been doing?”

Timmy replied, “Helping Drew.”

~~~

She said: I’m not a snob… I’m just better than you are.

~~~

A gentleman was lured into a busy florist shop by a large sign in the window that read, “Say It With Flowers.”

“Wrap up one rose,” he told the florist.

“Only one?” the florist asked.

“Just one,” the customer replied. “I’m a man of few words.”

~~~

Experience: what you get when you don’t get what you want

~~~

A counselor was helping his kids put their stuff away on their first morning in Summer Camp. He was surprised to see one of the youngsters had an umbrella. The counselor asked, “Why did you bring an umbrella to camp?”

The kid answered, “Did you ever have a mother?”

~~~

I think, therefore I am… I think.

~~~

Two retired professors were vacationing with their wives at a hotel in the Catskills.  They were sitting on the veranda one summer evening, watching the sunset.

The history professor asked the psychology professor, “Have you read Marx?”

To which the professor of psychology replied, “Yes.  I think it’s these pesky wicker chairs.”

~~~

We should be rigorous in judging ourselves and gracious in judging others.

John Wesley

~~~

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at http://rays-daily,com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

 

So how is it going?

Ray’s Daily

February 8, 2018

www.rays-daily.com

Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain – and most fools do.

Benjamin Franklin

complainer

I can’t stay long this morning as I have to help my wife straighten up the house before the cleaning people show up to clean and straighten up the house. After spending almost all my time resting in the recliner waiting for my ribs to heal it is now time to try to do more.

One nice thing about the distraction that the cleaners will provide is that I will not be listening to all the complaining that we hear too much of these days. I do understand that there are challenges that will not be solved by bombastic rhetoric and useless activity that goes nowhere but there is still a lot to be thankful for.

My hibernation has kept me from the folks who brighten my days, those who are generally positive. I enjoy people who like what they do and have little time to focus on what is wrong as they are too busy enjoying what is right in their lives.

How about you? If I asked you how things were going, what would you say? Some folks like to complain while others like to share the good news. I have learned that the secret to feeling good is to recognize what is good around us. Don’t be like this Monk.

Complain! Complain! Complain!

It takes a disciplined spirit to endure the monastery on Mount Serat in Spain. One of the fundamental requirements of this religious order is that the young men must maintain silence. Opportunities to speak are scheduled once every two years, at which time they are allowed to speak only two words.

One young initiate in this religious order, who had completed his first two years of training, was invited by his superior to make his first two-word presentation. “Food terrible,” he said.

Two years later the invitation was once again extended. The young man used this forum to exclaim, “Bed lumpy.”

Arriving at his superior’s office two years later he proclaimed, “I quit.” The superior looked at this young monk and said, “You know, it doesn’t surprise me a bit. All you’ve done since you arrived is complain, complain, complain.

Exaggerated? Maybe. What if you were asked to share two words that describe your Life? Would your focus be the lumps, bumps, and unfairness, or are you committed to dwell on those things that are good, right, and lovely?

~~~

We can throw stones, complain about them, stumble on them, climb over them, or build with them.

William Arthur Ward

~~~

“Here at First National, you’re not just a number – you’re two numbers, a dash, three more numbers, another dash, and another number.”

~~~

Some of us remember when:

Being sent to the drugstore to test vacuum tubes for the TV.

When Kool-Aid was the only drink for kids, other than milk and sodas.

When it took five minutes for the TV to warm up.

When nearly everyone’s mom was at home when the kids got there.

When a quarter was a decent allowance, and another quarter a huge bonus.

When your mom wore nylons that came in two pieces.

When all of your male teachers wore neckties and female teachers had their hair done, everyday.

When you got your windshield cleaned, oil checked, and gas pumped, without asking,….. for free, every time and you didn’t pay for air. And you got trading stamps to boot!

When laundry detergent had free glasses, dishes or towels hidden inside the box.

When it was considered a great privilege to be taken out to dinner at a real restaurant with your parents.

When they threatened to keep kids back a grade if they failed…and did!

~~~

Billing’s Law:  Live within your income, even if you have to borrow to do so.

Josh Billings

~~~

Pat was dying. His wife, Kristi, was maintaining a candlelight vigil by his side.  She held his fragile hand, tears running down her face. Her praying roused him from his slumber.  He looked up and his lips began to move slightly.

“My darling Kristi,” he whispered.

“Hush, my love,” she said. “Rest. Shhh, don’t talk.”

He was insistent. “Kristi,” he said in his tired voice.  “I…I have something I must confess to you.”

“There’s nothing to confess,” replied the weeping Kristi. “Everything’s all right, go to sleep.”

“No, no. I must die in peace, Kristi. I…I slept with your sister, your best friend, her best friend, and your mother!”

“I knew,” Kristi whispered softly. “That’s why I poisoned  you.”

~~~

“I put my air conditioner in backwards. It got cold outside. The weatherman on TV was confused. ‘It was supposed to be hot today, I don’t understand!'”
Steven Wright

~~~

A teacher asked one of her pupils, “What’s the nation’s capital?”

The reply was, “Washington DC.”

After the teacher asked the pupil what ‘DC’ stood for, the student added, “Dot com!”

~~~

“Did you know that it is a medically proven fact that people with the most birthdays live the longest?”

~~~

“Mom, I’ve decided I’m going to be a minister when I grow up.

“That’s okay with us,” the mother said, “But what made you decide to be a minister?”

“Well,” the boy replied, “I’ll have to go to church on Sunday anyway, and I figure it will be more fun to stand up and yell than to sit still and listen.

~~~

“Let’s face it, traveling just isn’t as much fun when all the historical sites are younger than you are.”

~~~

To complain is always nonacceptance of what is. It invariably carries an unconscious negative charge. When you complain, you make yourself into a victim. When you speak out, you are in your power. So change the situation by taking action or by speaking out if necessary or possible; leave the situation or accept it. All else is madness.

Eckhart Tolle

~~~

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at http://rays-daily,com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

 

Happy?

Ray’s Daily

February 7, 2018

www.rays-daily.com

“If you spend your whole life waiting for the storm, you’ll never enjoy the sunshine.”

Morris West

sunshine

I was at the doctors yesterday to check on my progress and as I already knew I still have a way to go. I have found that the path to recovery is to stay patient and not move too quickly. Friends and family keep reminding me that ribs take a long time to heal and I can verify that they are right.

While at the doctors a nurse friend asked why I seemed so happy. I told her that I was overjoyed that I had only injured my chest and ribs. I also said that while I was not very mobile there are still things I can do besides spending all my time in the recliner. In fact, in the next week or so I will be taken to see a Tony award winning play Spelling Bee being performed by my friends at the Actors Theatre of Indiana. And not too many days later I will get to watch a friend perform in the musical Mamma Mia. I have even been invited to have lunch with a couple of former colleagues from my Kiwanis/UNICEF days. So all in all I am pretty happy. I hope you are too.

May You …

R.L. Keith

May you find happiness in every direction your paths take you

May you never lose your sense of wonder, and may you hold on to the sense of humor you use to brighten the lives of everyone who knows you.

May you go beyond the ordinary steps and discover extraordinary results.

May you keep on trying to reach for your stars.

May you never forget how wonderful you are.

May you always be patient with the problems of life, and know that any clouds will eventually give way to the sunlight of your most hoped-for days.

May you be rewarded with friendships that get better and better, and with love that blesses your life forever.

May you meet every challenge you are faced with, recognize every golden opportunity, and be blessed with the knowledge that you have the ability to make every day special.

May you have enough material wealth to meet your needs, while never forgetting the real treasures of life are the loved ones and friends who are invaluable to the end.

May you search for serenity, and discover it was within you all along.

May you be strong enough to keep your hopes and dreams alive.

May you always be gentle enough to understand.

May you know that you hold tomorrow within your hands, and that the way there will be shared with the makings of what will be your most wonderful memories.

And may you always remember, each step along the way…  You are loved more than words can ever begin to say.

~~~

“Being happy doesn’t mean everything is perfect. It means you’ve decided to look beyond the imperfections.”

~~~

This is a handy guide that should be as common as a driver’s License in the wallet of every husband, boyfriend or significant other.!!!!!

DANGEROUS: What’s for dinner?

SAFER: Can I help you with dinner?

SAFEST: Where would you like to go for dinner?

DANGEROUS: Should you be eating that?

SAFER: You know, there are a lot of apples left.

SAFEST: Can I get you a glass of wine with that?

DANGEROUS: What did you DO all day?

SAFER: I hope you didn’t overdo it today.

SAFEST: I’ve always loved you in that robe.

~~~

“Reality is the leading cause of stress among those in touch with it.”

Lily Tomlin

~~~

A general noticed one of his soldiers behaving oddly.  The soldier would pick up any piece of paper he found, frown and say, “That’s not it” and put it down again. This went on for some time, until the general arranged to have the soldier psychologically tested.

The psychologist concluded that the soldier was deranged, and wrote out his discharge from the army. The soldier picked it up, smiled and said, “That’s it.”

~~~

We forfeit three-fourths of ourselves to be like other people.

Arthur Schopenhauer

~~~

As soon as the service had ended, little Benjy walks up to Rabbi Bloom and says, “When I grow up, Rabbi, I’m going to give you lots of money.”

Rabbi Bloom laughs and replies, “That’s really good to know, Benjy, but why do you want to do this?”

Benjy replies, “Because my Dad says you’re the poorest Rabbi we have ever had!”

~~~

We either make ourselves happy or miserable. The amount of work is the same.

Carlos Castaneda

~~~

There was a ventriloquist who had no work for six months. He went to his agent and told him he needed work badly. The agent said, “There’s no call for ventriloquists, but if you were a psychic I could get you plenty of work.”

So this ventriloquist went home and hung out a psychic sign. An hour later a woman knocks on the door: “I want to talk to my deceased husband-how much will it cost?”

The ventriloquist says, “If you talk to him, $50; if he talks to you, $100; and if you talk to each other while I’m drinking coffee, that’s $200.”

~~~

“It’s better for girls to be single but not for boys. Boys need somebody to clean up after them”

Anita, nine years old

~~~

A worried father asked his daughter if her latest beau was serious about their relationship.

“I’ll say he is, Daddy,” responded the girl. “Just last night he asked me how much you make, what kind of meals Mom serves, and if you two are easy to get along with.”

~~~

“Enjoy your own life without comparing it with that of another.”

Marquis de Condorcet

~~~

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at http://rays-daily,com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

 

Let them know

Ray’s Daily

February 6, 2018

The best things in life aren’t things… they’re your friends.

Appreciate-1

The other day I told one of my daughters that one of the toughest things about aging is the regular notification that an old friend has passed away. Often my remorse is made even more difficult because I regret that I never let them know just how much I appreciated them.

Here is a poem that is a reminder for us to stop once in awhile and tell someone how much we value their friendship.

Around the Corner

by: Henson Towne

Around the corner I have a friend

In this great city that has no end,

Yet the days go by and weeks rush on,

And before I know it, a year is gone

 

And I never see my old friends face,

For life is a swift and terrible race,

She knows I like her just as well

As in the days when I rang her bell,

 

And she rang mine.

We were younger then,

And now we are busy, tired men.

Tired of playing a foolish game,

Tired of trying to make a name.

“Tomorrow” I say “I will call on Jane”

“Just to show that I’m thinking of her”

 

But tomorrow comes and tomorrow goes,

And distance between us grows and grows.

Around the corner!-yet miles away,

“Here’s a telegram sir-“

“Jane died today.”

And that’s what we get and deserve in the end.

Around the corner, a vanished friend.

 If you love someone, tell them. Remember always to say “what you mean”. Never be afraid to express yourself. Take this opportunity to tell someone what they mean to you.

Seize the day and have no regrets. Most importantly, stay close to your friends and family, They have helped to make you the person you are today, What it’s all about anyway. Pass this along to your friends. Let it make a difference in your day and theirs.

~~~

You can’t stay in your corner of the Forest waiting for others to come to you. You have to go to them sometimes.

A.A. Milne

~~~

  1. What does HMO stand for?
  2. I just joined an HMO. How difficult will it be to choose the doctor I want?
  3. Just slightly more difficult than choosing your parents. Your insurer will provide you with a book listing all the doctors who participate in the plan. These doctors basically fall into two categories: those who are no longer accepting new patients, and those who will see you but are no longer part of the plan. But don’t worry, the remaining doctor who is still in the plan and accepting new patients has an office just a half-day’s drive away and that diploma from a small Caribbean Island is very fresh.
  4. Do all diagnostic procedures require pre-certification?
  5. No. Only those you need.
  6. What happens if I want to try alternative forms of medicine?
  7. You’ll need to find alternative forms of payment.
  8. What if I’m away from home and I get sick?
  9. You really shouldn’t do that.

~~~

Jewish Curse: May you be like a chandelier, hang by day and burn by night!

~~~

A guy stopped at a local gas station and, after filling his tank, he paid the bill and bought a soft drink. He stood by his car to drink his cola and watched a couple of men working along the roadside.

One man would dig a hole two or three feet deep and then move on. The other man came along behind him and filled in the hole. While one was digging a new hole, the other was 25 feet behind filling in the hole.

The men worked right past the guy with the soft drink and went on down the road. “I can’t stand this,” said the man tossing the can into a trash container and heading down the road toward the men.

“Hold it, hold it,” he said to the men. “Can you tell me what’s going on here with all this digging and refilling?”

“Well, we work for the government and we’re just doing our job,” one of the men said. “But one of you is digging a hole and the other fills it up. You’re not accomplishing anything. Aren’t you wasting the taxpayers’ money?”

“You don’t understand, mister,” one of the men said, leaning on his shovel and wiping his brow. “Normally there’s three of us: me, Elmer and Leroy. I dig the hole, Elmer sticks in the tree, and Leroy here puts the dirt back. Elmer’s job’s been cut… so now it’s just me an’ Leroy”.

~~~

MAKEUP: Lipstick, eyeliner, blush, etc. which ironically make Mom look better while making her young daughter look “cheap.”

~~~

The local sheriff was looking for a deputy, so a blonde went in to try out for the job.  “Okay,” the sheriff drawled, “what is 1 and 1?”

“Eleven,” she replied.

The sheriff thought to himself, “That’s not what I meant, but she’s right.”  “What two days of the week start with the letter ‘T’?”

“Today and tomorrow.”

He was again surprised that the blonde supplied a correct answer that he had never thought of himself.

“Now, listen carefully: Who killed Abraham Lincoln?”

The blonde looked a little surprised herself, then thought really hard for a minute and finally admitted, “I don’t know.”

“Well, why don’t you go home and work on that one for a while?”

So, the blonde wandered over to the beauty parlor, where her pals were waiting to hear the results of the interview.

“It went great!  First day on the job and I’m already working on a murder case!”

~~~

To ensure that the self doesn’t shrink, to see that it holds on to its volume, memories have to be watered like potted flowers, and the watering calls for regular contact with the witnesses of the past, that is to say, with friends.

Milan Kundera

~~~

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at http://rays-daily,com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

 

We can do better

Ray’s Daily

February 5, 2018

http://www.rays-daily.com

“Hate is too great a burden to bear. It injures the hater more than it injures the hated.”

Coretta Scott King

Anger

My recovery continues as I slowly regain my ability to get out and about. Tomorrow I will drive to the doctor so she can evaluate my progress and more. Wednesday, I will visit my dentist knowing that nothing they can do will be as painful as the last few weeks have been. I am still a long way away from being fully active but I am getting there. Just don’t let me laugh, sneeze or cough because when I do I am reminded why I should not walk on ice.

One of the byproducts of my weeks spent in my recliner has been a lot of time for reflection. It also included a lot of time for observation as I watched the world around me played out in the news and in hundreds of e-mails.

While I enjoyed reminiscing about the good times in my own life I was distressed by what appeared to be so much unhappiness in the lives of so many others. The loud voices I heard were filled with anger and animosity. It seems like today’s discourse is filled with bombastic rhetoric from folks so driven by narcissism that they won’t listen to others.

I fear that we are becoming a society that is starting to believe that winning is based on making sure the other guy loses no matter by what means. I yearn for a time when winning was based on doing our best and not on making sure the others don’t succeed. The trouble with buying into hate is that folks pay a price by sacrificing who they might otherwise be. Here is a piece I stumbled across that I would like to share with you today.

Be Strong and Walk Away

Don’t let anyone bring you down so low as to hate them. Release them from the hold they have on you and continue on with peace in your heart. Life is short and is not worth wasting your time trying to figure people out or prove anything to them. The only person you have to prove anything to is yourself. Strive to be the best person you can possibly be, be strong, and walk away. Holding on to bitterness and anger will only hinder your happiness. Your life is much too precious to spend another minute worrying about someone that doesn’t bring you happiness. Say goodbye and wish them well. After all, they’ve made you a stronger person. They’ll see the light someday.

~~~

A pessimist is a man who thinks everybody is as nasty as himself, and hates them for it.

George Bernard Shaw

~~~

“Hey, Mom,” asked Little Johnny, “can you give me twenty dollars?”

“Certainly not,” she said.

“If you do,” he went on, “I’ll tell you what dad said to the maid when you were at the beauty shop.”

His mother’s ears perked up and, grabbing her purse, she handed over the money.

“Well? What did he say?”

“He said, ‘Hey, Marie, make sure you wash my socks tomorrow.'”

~~~

What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.

Ralph Waldo Emerson

~~~

My alphabet starts with this letter called yuzz.

It’s the letter I use to spell yuzz-a-ma-tuzz.

You’ll be sort of surprised what there is to be found,

once you go beyond ‘Z’ and start poking around.

Dr. Seuss

~~~

“I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.”

Noel Coward

~~~

Two rural church deacons who were having a sociable beer in the local tavern when they saw their minister drive by and take a good long look at their pickup trucks parked outside.

One deacon ducked down and said, “I hope the reverend didn’t see us or recognize my pickup.”

The other replied indifferently, “What difference does it make. God knows we’re in here… and he’s the only one who counts.”

The first deacon countered, “Yeah, but God won’t tell my wife.”

~~~

“Daddy, Charlie asked me to marry him, but I told him I couldn’t leave Mama.”

“Oh, that’s okay. Take her with you.”

~~~

An 80 year old man went to the doctor for a checkup and the doctor was amazed at what good shape the guy was in. The doctor asked, “To what do you attribute your good health?”

The old timer said, “I’m a golfer and that’s why I’m in such good shape.   I’m up well before daylight and out golfing up and down the fairways.”

The doctor said, “Well, I’m sure that helps, but there’s got to be more to it. How old was your father when he died?”

The old timer said, “Who said my father’s dead?”

The doctor said, “You mean you’re 80 years old and your father is still alive?  How old is he?”

The old timer said, “He’s 100 yrs old and, in fact, he golfed with me this morning. That’s why he’s still alive, he’s a golfer.”

The doctor said, “Well, that’s great, but I’m sure there’s more to it. How about your grandfather? How old was he when he died?”

The old timer said, “Who said my grandpa’s dead?”

The doctor said, “You mean you’re 80 years old and your grandfather’s still living! How old is he?”

The old timer said, “He’s 118 yrs old.”

The doctor was getting frustrated at this point and said, “I guess he went golfing with you this morning too?”

The old timer said, “No…Grandpa couldn’t go this morning because he got married.”

The doctor said in amazement, “Got married!! Why would a 118-year-old guy want to get married?”

The old timer shot back, “Who said he wanted to?”

~~~

“It is easy to hate and it is difficult to love. This is how the whole scheme of things works. All good things are difficult to achieve; and bad things are very easy to get.”

Rene Descartes

~~~

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at http://rays-daily,com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

You really are special

Ray’s Daily

February 2, 2018

http://www.rays-daily.com

“You are amazing person with unique talents. Have faith in your abilities.”

Lailah Gifty Akita

You-are-so-special

In the last few days I have received well over one hundred birthday greetings. They triggered fond memories of som truly fabulous friends and acquaintances. Many are well known, others leaders in their fields and many are just he unsung good people. These are the folks that brighten our world every day. I just wish more of them realized how important they are.

As I reminisced about times spent with these friends I thought about a piece written by Marc Chernoff where he suggested that we should think better of ourselves. I’d like to share his list of what we should stop saying to ourselves because I would like you too to kanw how special you are.

Stop saying:

I’m not good enough yet.” – You might think you’re not good enough, but you’ll surprise yourself if you keep trying.  Your past does not determine who you are. Your past prepares you for who you are capable of becoming. 

“I should be living up to other people’s expectations.” – Remember, it’s always better to be at the bottom of the ladder you want to climb than the top of the one you don’t. 

“What they think and say about me matters.” – Don’t let others crush your dreams.  Do just once what they say you can’t do, and you will never pay attention to their negativity again. 

“I need recognition for my actions to be worthwhile.” – Do what you know is right.  Integrity is doing the right thing, no matter what, even when nobody’s going to know whether you did it or not. 

“It’s too late for me.” – Don’t let yesterday steal your present.  Don’t judge yourself by your past… you don’t live there anymore.  Let go, grow, and move forward. 

“I need to have it all figured out.” – Does the walker choose the path, or the path the walker?  Believe it or not, sometimes it’s the latter.

“I do not have enough to be positive and grateful.” – Do not ask for instant fulfillment in your life, but for patience to accept your current frustrations.  Do not ask for perfection in all you do, but for the wisdom to not repeat past mistakes. 

“My life should be easier and free of discomfort.” – Great challenges make life interesting; overcoming them makes life meaningful.  It’s how you deal with failure and discomfort that determines your level of success and happiness.  Laugh at your mistakes and learn from them

“I can’t forgive them.” – Forgiveness is a promise.  When you forgive someone you are making a promise not to hold the unchangeable past against your present self. 

“I am alone.” – You can’t make it through on your own.  None of us can.  That’s why, thank goodness, you are never as alone as you sometimes feel. 

~~~

“Don’t sell yourself short; you are your best asset.”

Matshona Dhliwayo

~~~

A man walks into a restaurant with a full-grown ostrich behind him. As he sits, the waitress comes over and asks for their orders.  The man says, “I’ll have a hamburger, fries and a coke,” and turns to the ostrich, “What’s yours?”

“I’ll have the same,” says the ostrich.

A short time later the waitress returns with the order. “That will be $6.40 please,” and the man reaches into his pocket and pulls out the exact change for payment. The next day, the man and the ostrich come again and the man says, “I’ll have a hamburger, fries and a coke,” and the ostrich says, “I’ll have the same.”

Once again the man reaches into his pocket and pays with exact change. This becomes a routine until late one evening, the two enter again. “The usual?” asks the waitress. “No, this is Friday night, so I will have a steak, baked potato and salad,” says the man, “same for me,” says the ostrich.

A short time later the waitress comes with the order and says, “That will be $12.62.”  Once again the man pulls exact change out of his pocket and places it on the table. The waitress can’t hold back her curiosity any longer. “Excuse me, sir.  How do you manage to always come up with the exact change out of your pocket every time?”

“Well,” says the man, “several years ago I was cleaning the attic and I found an old lamp.  When I rubbed it a Genie appeared and offered me two wishes. My first wish was that if I ever had to pay for anything, I would just put my hand in my pocket and the right amount of money would always be there.”

“That’s brilliant!” says the waitress.  “Most people would wish for a million dollars or something, but you’ll always be as rich as you want for as long as you live!”

“That’s right.  Whether it’s a gallon of milk or a Rolls Royce, the exact money is always there,” says the man.

The waitress asks, “One other thing, sir, what’s with the ostrich?”

The man sighs, pauses, and answers, “My second wish was for a tall chick with long legs who agrees with everything I say.”

~~~

Honk if you love peace and quiet.

~~~

You Know It’s Time To Diet When….

You put mayonnaise on an aspirin.

You go to the zoo and the elephants throw you peanuts.

Your driver’s license says, “Picture continued on other side.”

You ran away and they had to use all four sides of the milk carton for your picture.

You learn you were born with a silver shovel in your mouth.

You could sell shade.

Your blood type is Ragu.

~~~

After 50 years of wondering why he didn’t look like his younger sister or brother, the man finally got up the nerve to ask his mother if he was adopted. “Yes, you were son,” his mother said as she started to cry softly. “but it didn’t work out and they brought you back.”

~~~

“If you’re struggling today, remember that life is worth living and believe that the best is yet to come. Remember that you are loved, you matter, and never forget that there is always hope.”

Germany Kent

~~~

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at http://rays-daily,com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

 

Thanks my friend

Ray’s Daily

February 1, 2018

http://www.rays-daily.com

Friends are the family you choose

Jess C. Scott

never alone

I was somewhat overwhelmed yesterday, I not only celebrated my birthday with my family, I also received well wishes from friends and former colleagues from various parts of the world. There were even messaged from people that only know me through my daily ramblings.

My age has resulted in my not getting around as much as I use to resulting in less contact with folks. Yesterday was proof that friendships don’t require constant contact, they exist strengthened by the memories of past shared experiences. A friend in Norway reminded me of my happy times there. An Indianapolis civic leader’s greeting brought back memories of our joint efforts over the years.  A New York health worker brought back recollections of her good heart and past kindness.

To all who wrote I appreciate the gift of your friendship, I truly treasure not only the relationships but all so the times we have shared. Now I begin again, I may not run as fast but I can still enjoy my world and the life it provides.

Here is a story that relates to how I feel about all who have sat on the stump beside me.

We are never alone

Do you know the legend of the Cherokee Indian youth ‘s rite of passage?

His father takes him into the forrest…blindfolded…and leaves him….alone. He is required to sit on a stump the whole night…and not take off the blindfold until the ray of sun shines through it. He is all by himself. He cannot cry out for help to anyone.

Once he survives the night…he is a MAN. He cannot tell the other boys of this experience. Each boy must come into his own manhood.

The boy was terrified…could hear all kinds of noise…Beasts were all around him. Maybe even some human would hurt him. The wind blew the grass and earth… and it shook his stump. But he sat stoically…never removing the blindfold. It would be the only way he could be a man.

Finally, after a horrific night…the sun appeared and he removed his blindfold. It was then that he saw his father…sitting on the stump next to him…at watch…the entire night.

We are never truly alone. Even when we do not know it, our family and friends are watching out for us…sitting on a stump beside us.

~~~

Let us be grateful to people who make us happy, they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom.

Marcel Proust

~~~

Things Your Mom Would Never Say To You  —

“How on earth can you see the TV sitting so far back?”

“Yeah, I used to skip school a lot, too”

“Just leave all the lights on … it makes the house look more cheery”

“Let me smell that shirt — Yeah, it’s good for another week”

“Go ahead and keep that stray dog, honey. I’ll be glad to feed and walk him every day”

“Well, if Timmy’s mom says it’s OK, that’s good enough for me.”

“The curfew is just a general time to shoot for. It’s not like I’m running a prison around here.”

“Don’t bother wearing a jacket – the wind-chill is bound to improve.”

~~~

A new neighbor asked the little girl next door if she had any brothers and sisters. She replied, “No, I’m the lonely child.”

~~~

A wife went to the police station with her next-door neighbor to report that her husband was missing.  The policeman asked for a description.

She said, “He’s 35 years old, 6 foot 4, had dark eyes, dark wavy hair, an athletic build, weighs 185 pounds, is soft-spoken, and is good to the children.”

The next-door neighbor protested, “Your husband is 5 foot 4 inches, chubby, bald, has a big mouth, and is mean to your children.”

The wife replied, “Yes, but who wants HIM back?”

~~~

Blutarsky’s Axiom:  Nothing is impossible for the man who will not listen to reason.

~~~

Three old men are at the doctor for a memory test. The doctor says to the first old man, “What is three times three?”

“274” was his reply.

The doctor worriedly says to the second man, “It’s your turn. What is three times three?”

“Tuesday” replies the second man.

The doctor sadly says to the third man, “Okay, your turn. What’s three times three”?

“Nine” says the third man.

“That’s great!” exclaims the doctor. “How did you get that”?

“Jeez, Doc, it’s pretty simple,” says the third man. “I just subtracted 274 from Tuesday.”

~~~

If you want people to think you wise, just agree with them.

Leo Rosten

~~~

A customer was continually bothering the waiter in a restaurant; first, he’d asked that the air conditioning be turned up because he was too hot, then he asked it be turned down because he was too cold, and so on for about half an hour.

Surprisingly, the waiter was very patient, walking back and forth and never once getting angry. So finally, a second customer asked why didn’t they just throw out the pest.

“Oh I don’t care.” said the waiter with a smile. “We don’t even have an air conditioner.”

~~~

“I saw my psychiatrist. I told him, ‘Doc, I keep thinking I’m a dog.’ He told me to get off his couch.”
Rodney Dangerfield

~~~

True friendship multiplies the good in life and divides its evils. Strive to have friends, for life without friends is like life on a desert island… to find one real friend in a lifetime is good fortune; to keep him is a blessing.

~~~

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at http://rays-daily,com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

 

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