February 18, 2018
Make new friends, but keep the old; Those are silver, these are gold.
I know I have talked a lot about how important it is that we avoid the erosion of our friendships. There is nothing more detrimental to our well being than loneliness and it is important that we maintain our friendships.
There was just an article published in Time magazine that I edited so I could share with you how we can maintain our health and happiness by adding to our pool of friends. Here in part is what was offered.
How to Make Friends as an Adult — and Why It’s Important
Modern life can become so busy that people forget to keep choosing each other. That’s when friendships fade, and there’s reason to believe it’s happening more than ever. Loneliness is on the rise, and feeling lonely has been found to increase a person’s risk of dying early by 26%–and to be even worse for the body than obesity and air pollution.
The antidote is simple: friendship. It helps protect the brain and body from stress, anxiety and depression.
Easy as the fix may sound, it can be difficult to keep and make friends as an adult. But research suggests that you only need between four and five close pals. If you’ve ever had a good one, you know what you’re looking for
If you’re trying to replenish a dried-up friendship pool, start by looking inward. Think back to how you met some of your very favorite friends. Volunteering on a political campaign or in a favorite spin class? “Friendships are always about something,” says Rawlins. Common passions help people bond at a personal level, and they bridge people of different ages and life experiences.
Whatever you’re into, someone else is too. Let your passion guide you toward people. Volunteer, for example, take a new course or join a committee at your local religious center. Using apps and social media–like Facebook to find a local book club–is also a good way to find simpatico folks.
Once you meet a potential future friend, then comes the scary part: inviting them to do something. “There’s a chance that the person will say no. But there’s also the chance they’ll say yes, and something really great could happen.” The process takes time, and you may experience false starts. Not everyone will want to put in the effort necessary to be a good friend.
It’s never too late to start being a better pal. The work you put into friendships–both new and old–will be well worth it for your health and happiness.
“Be genuinely interested in everyone you meet and everyone you meet will be genuinely interested in you”
When we moved into our new home, the first one we owned rather than rented, two of my husband’s friends gave him a bottle of champagne. In the hustle and bustle of getting settled, the gift was tucked away and temporarily forgotten.
Three months later we held a Christening party for our third child.
Champagne flowed in celebration until, running short, we remembered our housewarming gift. In front of our guests, I opened the attached card and read it aloud, “Donald, take good care of this one, it’s yours!”
Girlfriend: And are you sure you love me and no one else?
Boyfriend: Dead Sure! I checked the whole list again yesterday.
“Send someone over quickly!” the old woman screamed into the phone. “Two naked bikers are climbing up toward my bedroom window!” This is the Fire Department, lady,” the voice replied. “I’ll have to transfer you to the Police Department.”
“No, it’s YOU I want!” she yelled. “They need a longer ladder!”
“When you are down and out, something always turns up — and it is usually the noses of your friends.”
Morris has a business appointment, and he arrives a little early. The receptionist points to a comfortable easy chair, and asks him to be seated for a short while. Morris settles down, picks up a glossy magazine from the glass-topped table, opens it, and tries to read. However, he finds that he cannot concentrate because he is distracted due to a rumpus coming from behind one of the doors leading off the reception area. Morris goes over to the receptionist and asks: “What’s going on in there?”
She replies: “It’s a partners’ meeting.”
“But why are they shouting at each other?” Morris asks.
“It’s a battle of wits,” she replies.
Morris asks: “Who is in there?”, and she answers: “Horowits, Lebowits, Rabinowits and Abramowits.”
“Wise man talk because they have something to say; fools talk because they have to say something.”
Jane had a system for labeling homemade freezer meals. She would carefully note in large clear letters, “Meatloaf” or “Pot Roast” or “Steak and Vegetables” or “Chicken and Dumplings” or “Beef Pot Pie.”
Everyday when she asked her husband what he wanted for dinner, he never asked for any of those meals. She decided to stock the freezer with his various requests. What he really likes.
In Jane’s freezer you’ll see a whole new set of labels. You’ll find dinners with neat little tags that say: “Whatever,” “Anything,” “I Don’t Know,” “I Don’t Care,” “Something Good,” or “Food.”
No more frustration for Jane because no matter what her husband replies when she asks him what he wants for dinner, it’s there waiting.
She said “I got rid of my husband. The cat was allergic.”
She said: At the company where I work, the other operators and I share a coffeepot. One morning I took it into the ladies room to fill it with water. Then I began preening in the mirror, brushing my hair and reapplying some makeup.
I didn’t realize how long I’d been until someone slid a note under the door.
“You win,” it read. Any ransom demand will be met. Just release the coffeepot.”
“A friend may be waiting behind a stranger’s face.”
Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.
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