February 9, 2018
“When you judge others, you do not define them, you define yourself”
I ventured out yesterday to do a few errands and found that I still have to take it slow, but at least I did something. Next week I will attend a few events I just hope the weather makes driving practical, I can’t rely on others for transportation forever.
As you know I believe everyone we meet is a potential friend but that only is possible if we keep an open mind and don’t make snap judgements. I would hate to miss a friendship because I failed to get to know someone. Recently Mark Chernoff published Quotes to Change How You See & Treat People I have listed his list below. I think it is well worth your time.
Change How You See & Treat People
1.Everybody you meet is afraid of something, loves something, and has lost something. Know this. You never know what someone has been through, or what they’re going through today. Don’t be lazy and make empty judgments about them. Be kind. Ask about their stories. Listen. Be humble. Be teachable. Be a good neighbor.
2.Some people build lots of walls in their lives and not enough bridges. Don’t be one of them. Open yourself up. Take small chances on people. Let them shift your perspective. We all take different roads seeking fulfillment, joy, and peace. Just because someone is traveling a different road, doesn’t mean they’re lost or going the wrong way.
3.No one has ever made themselves strong by showing how small someone else is. Remember this, and communicate accordingly.
4.The single greatest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place. Too often we don’t listen to understand—we listen to reply. Bring awareness to this. And listen for what’s truly behind the words.
5.Be present. Be thoughtful. Compliment people. Magnify their strengths, not their weaknesses. This is how to make a real and lasting difference in your relationships, new and old.
6.Set an example. Treat everyone with respect, even those who are rude to you—not because they are nice, but because YOU are. And do your best to be thankful for the rude and difficult people too; they serve as great reminders of how not to be.
7.People will rarely think and act exactly the way you want them to. Hope for the best, but expect less. Agree to disagree when necessary. And be careful not to dehumanize those you disagree with. In our self-righteousness, we can easily become the very things we dislike in others.
8.People are much nicer when they’re happier, which says a lot about those who aren’t very nice to us. Sad, but true. The way we treat people we disagree with is a report card on what we’ve learned about love, compassion and kindness. Let’s just wish them well, and be on our way.
9.You can’t control how people receive your energy. And you can’t take things too personally, even if it seems personal. Rarely do people do things because of you. They do things because of them. There is a huge amount of freedom that comes to when you detach from other people’s behaviors. The way they treat you is their issue, how you respond is yours. (We discuss this in more detail in the “Relationships” chapter of our book.)
10.The wisest, most loving, and well-rounded people you have ever met are likely those who have been shattered by some kind of heartbreak. Yes, life often creates the best humans by breaking them first. Their destruction into pieces allows them to be fine-tuned and reconstructed into a masterpiece. Let this continue to remind you to be way kinder than necessary, every step of the way.
Watch out for the joy-stealers: gossip, criticism, complaining, faultfinding, and a negative, judgmental attitude.
Drew and Timmy were brothers. One day Mom and Dad had to go into town. Dad told Drew, “While we are gone I want you boys to clear away the dirty dishes, clean your room, and mow the grass.”
When they returned nothing had been done. Dad was very upset. He asked Drew, “What have you been doing while we were gone?”
Drew replied in a low voice, “Nothing.”
Dad then turns to Timmy and asks, “What have you been doing?”
Timmy replied, “Helping Drew.”
She said: I’m not a snob… I’m just better than you are.
A gentleman was lured into a busy florist shop by a large sign in the window that read, “Say It With Flowers.”
“Wrap up one rose,” he told the florist.
“Only one?” the florist asked.
“Just one,” the customer replied. “I’m a man of few words.”
Experience: what you get when you don’t get what you want
A counselor was helping his kids put their stuff away on their first morning in Summer Camp. He was surprised to see one of the youngsters had an umbrella. The counselor asked, “Why did you bring an umbrella to camp?”
The kid answered, “Did you ever have a mother?”
I think, therefore I am… I think.
Two retired professors were vacationing with their wives at a hotel in the Catskills. They were sitting on the veranda one summer evening, watching the sunset.
The history professor asked the psychology professor, “Have you read Marx?”
To which the professor of psychology replied, “Yes. I think it’s these pesky wicker chairs.”
We should be rigorous in judging ourselves and gracious in judging others.
Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.
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