December 14, 2017
Living in an age of advertisement, we are perpetually disillusioned.
I am off this morning to be checked out by one of my favorite cardiologist’s. I know she is good because she does not take me seriously. Not only that she is really a skilled physician, I need to go so I am providing you the daily I wrote 12 years ago. My message is still relevant during difficult times.
Ray’s Daily first published on December 14, 2005
When I made my breakfast this morning I used a frozen scrambled egg patty as part of my bagel, sausage, and egg sandwich. The egg patties were made by a company that was called something like Harrisville Farms. That got me thinking about how we no longer care about reality as much as we seem to be willing to buy into imposed images. I am sure there are no ladies sitting in a farmhouse kitchen making and freezing egg patties just for me. I really do know that I was eating something made in a food factory somewhere.
Most of us are inundated every day with advertising like the ones showing Mama in the kitchen making spaghetti sauce in her stovetop pot for millions of us each day. I also doubt that Mrs. Paul has been around forever making and freezing fish just for you and me.
I could possibly tolerate stretching the truth if it was only advertising that thrived on putting unreal thoughts and images in our head; unfortunately that is not the case. These same advertising concepts spill over into our everyday lives. For example, is what we hear from the body politic accurate or propaganda? It bothers me that we just accept it all and don’t seem to care. I wonder sometimes if we have become so use to misleading information that we have trouble deciding what is real and what is fantasy. Far too many of us don’t seem willing to make an effort to find out what is true and what is false. If we cannot separate truth from fiction how can we select what is best for us.
If it is the truth that sets us free, what does illusion do?
Maury’s wife likes to sing so she decided to join the church choir. From time to time she would practice while she was in the kitchen preparing dinner. Whenever she would start in on a song, Maury would head outside to the porch.
His wife, with hurt feelings, finally said, “What’s the matter, Maury? Don’t you like my singing?”
Maury replied, “Honey, I love your singing, but I just want to make sure the neighbors know I’m not beating you.”
“I’m afraid I was very much the traditionalist. I went down on one knee and dictated a proposal which my secretary faxed over straight away.”
A young man called his mother and announced excitedly that he had just met the woman of his dreams. Now what should he do?
His mother had an idea: “Why don’t you send her flowers, and on the card invite her to your apartment for a home-cooked meal?”
He thought this was a great strategy, and a week later, the woman came to dinner. His mother called the next day to see how things had gone.
“I was totally humiliated,” he moaned. “She insisted on washing the dishes.”
“What’s wrong with that?” asked his mother.
“We hadn’t started eating yet.”
The word ‘aerobics’ came about when the gym instructors got together and said: If we’re going to charge $10 an hour, we can’t call it Jumping up and down.
Two women were paired together as partners in a club tournament and met on the putting green for the first time. After introductions, the first golfer asked, “What’s your handicap?”
“Oh, I’m a scratch golfer,” the other replied.
“Really!” exclaimed the first woman suitably impressed that she was paired up with her.
“Yes, I write down all my good scores and scratch out the bad ones!
“A modest little person, with much to be modest about.”
Mrs. Crumps was called to serve for jury duty, but asked to be excused because she didn’t believe in capital punishment and didn’t want her personal thoughts to prevent the trial from running its proper course.
But the public defender liked her thoughtfulness and quiet calm, and tried to convince her that she was appropriate to serve on the jury.
“Madam,” he explained, “This is not a murder trial! It’s a simple civil lawsuit. A wife is bringing this case against her husband because he gambled away the $12,000 he had promised to use to remodel the kitchen for her birthday.”
“Well, okay,” agreed Mrs. Crumps, “I’ll serve. I guess I could be wrong about capital punishment after all.”
Support a Lawyer – Become a Doctor
A widow recently married to a widower was accosted by a friend who laughingly remarked: “I suppose, like all men who have been married before, your husband sometimes talks about his first wife?”
“Oh, not any more, he doesn’t,” the other replied.
“What stopped him?”
“I started talking about my next husband.”
Don’t go to a school reunion. There’ll be a lot of old people there claiming to be your classmates.
With cable companies insisting that subscribers are better off by having to buy groups of channels than if they were allowed to order channels individually, America’s supermarket industry is preparing to offer similar savings to food shoppers. Milk, for example, will be sold only as part of a grouping that also includes three pounds of ground round, a bottle of wine, a box of cereal, a pound of sugar, and a copy of the National Enquirer. Supermarkets call it the “Basic Package,” but also have an “Upper Tier” that throws in products most customers would never use. If you buy enough items you don’t want, you can save hundreds of dollars per year.
Did you ever notice when you blow in a dog’s face he gets mad at you?
But when you take him in a car he sticks his head out the window.
She said: At my granddaughter’s wedding, the DJ polled the guests to see who had been married longest. It turned out to be my husband and I. The DJ asked us, “What advice would you give to the newly-married couple?”
I said, “The three most important words in a marriage are, ‘You’re probably right.'”
Everyone then looked at my husband. He said, “She’s probably right.”
The happiness that is genuinely satisfying is accompanied by the fullest exercise of our faculties and the fullest realization of the world in which we live.
Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.
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