June 12, 2017
“Live life to it’s fullest or it may seem like you died young.”
I hope you are doing well, If you are like I am your days are filled with more than just routine, if not maybe you ought to consider adding luster to the days ahead. Too many of us fall into so much of a routine that we live pretty much the same day over and over again, seven days a week,
I recently read an article taken from a National Public Radio offering of former NPR reporter Barb Haggerty entitled 8 Ways You Can Survive — And Thrive In — Midlife that reminded me that it really does not have to be that way. Here in part is what she said:
Ways You Can Survive — And Thrive In — Midlife
After two years of research and more than 400 interviews about midlife, former NPR reporter Barb Bradley Hagerty received dozens of insights about how to live well in the middle years.
- Aim for long-term meaning rather than short-term happiness, and you will likely find both. Aristotle suggested as much when he talked about eudaemonia, or the good life: striving with a purpose — raising terrific children, training for a marathon — rather than setting your sights on immediate pleasures, such as enjoying a good meal or a day at the beach. It’s also the best thing you can do for your mind and your health.
- Choose what matters most. Clayton Christensen at Harvard Business School describes the eroding effect of short-term decisions — specifically, doing the activity that brings you immediate gratification (such as work) and putting off harder but ultimately more fulfilling activities (such as investing in your marriage and children).
- Lean into fear, not boredom. Most of us become competent at our work by our 40s, and then we have a choice: Play it safe or take a risk. Howard Stevenson, also a professor (emeritus) at Harvard Business School, believes the greatest source of unhappiness in work is risk aversion — which leads to stagnation and resentment. Rather, be intentional as you try to shape your work to reflect your skills, personality and talents. But we have only one spin at the wheel, so make it count. A great line from Stevenson: “Ask yourself regularly: How will I use these glorious days left to me for the best purpose?”
- “At every stage of life, you should be a rookie at something.” This insight comes from Chris Dionigi, a Ph.D. in “weed science” and the deputy director of the National Invasive Species Council (that kind of weed). He believes trying new things and failing keeps you robust. Always have something new and challenging in your life, he says, “and if that something is of service to people and things you care about, you can lead an extraordinary life.”
- A few setbacks are just what the doctor ordered. Bad events seem to cluster in midlife — losing a spouse, a marriage, a parent, your job, your perfect health. But people with charmed lives — zero traumas — were unhappier and more easily distressed than people who had suffered a few negative events in their lifetime. According to resilience research, some setbacks give you perspective and help you bounce back.
- Happiness is love. Full stop. This observed wisdom comes from George Vaillant, a psychiatrist and researcher who directed Harvard’s Study of Adult Development for several decades. Vaillant found that the secret to a successful and happy life is not biology. It is not genes. It is not social privilege or education. It is not IQ or even family upbringing. The secret to thriving is warm relationships. Oh, then there’s this happy coda: Second chances present themselves all the time, if you’ll only keep your eyes open.
“Some people enjoy life—others just survive.”
Little Johnny had been bringing his drawings home from kindergarten every day since he started a month ago. Each day his mother admires the pictures and hangs them on the refrigerator. One thing starts bothering her though. Little Johnny only uses black and browns for his drawings. Fearing a problem with her young son and not wanting to make it worse, she decides to take him to a child psychologist.
The psychologist delicately goes to work. He gives Johnny a battery of psychological tests. He chats with Johnny. Everything seems perfectly normal. Every day for two weeks, the tests continue. Yet every day, little Johnny continues to bring home drawings in only black and brown.
Frustrated at not being able to get to the root of the problem and fearful that something is terrible wrong, the child psychologist decides to give little Johnny some paper and a box of crayons and observe what happens.
Little Johnny opens the box of crayons and says,
“Oh boy! A new box of crayons! At school we only have old boxes. The only ones left in mine are always black and brown!”
“Those who do not complain are never pitied.”
Amanpreet had told all of his friends about the great steak he’d eaten downtown the day before. A group of them decided to head down and see if was really as large and delicious as he was making it out to be.
The group was seated in the back of the restaurant. After looking over the menu, they ordered and waited, hungrily, for their large, delicious pieces of beef.
To their collective disappointment, the waiter brought out some of the smallest steaks they’d ever seen.
“Now see here,” a very embarrassed Preet said to the waiter. “Yesterday when I came down here you served me a BIG, juicy, steak. Today, though, when I have my friends about, you serve small steaks! What is the meaning of this???”
“Yes, sir,” replied the waiter, “yesterday you were sitting by the window….”
My #1 goal is to always speak well of others.
My #2 goal is to make sure I don’t end up like the losers I know.
My friend’s sister was to be married on short notice but still wanted an elaborate wedding. The invitations were ready to be mailed when someone noticed that there were no inserted cards inviting guests to the reception. Undaunted, the mother of the bride typed up a note, made 280 copies and enclosed one with each formal invitation. Family and friends were surprised to read: “Conception immediately following the ceremony in the grand Ballroom of the Holiday Inn. Everyone is invited.”
“The good news is that every morning we have the choice; not to be controlled by circumstances nor our past but by purposely designing our day, hence our lives better. Not to react to life but to respond with love.”
Bernard Kelvin Clive
Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.
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