Be not afraid of life. Believe that life is worth living, and your belief will help create the fact.
I had lunch with a friend yesterday who is not only wise but who is also an unselfish humanitarian who is constantly working to make our city a better place. I think his greatest attribute is that he cares.
We both reported that we are hearing from folks who are scared of what the turmoil in Washington is going to mean. Younger folks with health problems are worried that the talks of insurance reform may result in their losing their insurance. Many seniors worry that the talk of Medicare and Social Security changes can put at risk their ability live reasonably well in the years ahead.
As we talked the list continued to grow. Our situation globally is in flux and we don’t know what that might mean. Education, the arts and public health are facing potential major changes that can affect us all.
Few of us have the ability as individuals to change the world others create for us. Sure if enough people band together and speak loud enough it can make a difference but for most of us we just do the best we can. In that vein I would like to share with you the following creed. It is up to us not to let external factors take is down and we can do that if we focus on our strengths.
A Creed to Live By
- Don’t undermine your worth by comparing yourself with others.
- It is because we are different that each of us are special. Don’t set your goals by what other people deem important. Only do what is best for you.
- Don’t take for granted the things closest to your heart. Cling to them as you would your life, for without them life is meaningless.
- Don’t let life slip through your fingers by living in the past or in the future. By living one day at a time you live all days of your life.
- Don’t give up when you still have something to give. Nothing is really over until the moment you stop trying.
- Don’t be afraid to admit that you are less than perfect. It is the fragile thread that binds us to each other.
- Don’t be afraid to encounter risks. It is by taking chances that we learn how to be brave.
- Don’t shut love out of your life by saying it is impossible. The fastest way to lose love is to hold to it tightly, and the best way to keep love is to give it wings.
- Don’t dismiss your dreams. To be without dreams is to be without hope, to be without hope is to be without purpose.
- Don’t run through life so fast that you forget not only where you have been, but also where you are going. Life is not a race, but a journey to be savoured each step of the way.
Find the seed at the bottom of your heart and bring forth a flower.
One of our clients brought in his massive Doberman pinscher to be spayed. As a veterinary assistant, I escort the patient into the doctor’s office. Before taking this dog’s leash, I glimpsed those large teeth of hers and asked the owner, “Is she friendly?”
“Friendly?” said the man. “Friendly? She’s had five litters! How much ‘friendlier’ than that can she get?”
Q: Did you hear about the new auto insurance policy for Jewish mothers?
A: It is known as the “My Fault” policy.
Life in 2029:
Baby conceived naturally…scientists stumped.
Couple petitions court to reinstate heterosexual marriage.
George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2036.
Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $17.89 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.
85-year, $75.8 billion study: Diet and Exercise is the key to weight loss.
Average weight of Americans drops to 250 lbs.
Average height of NBA players now nine feet, seven inches.
New federal law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly swatters and rolled-up newspapers must be registered by January 2036.
Congress authorizes direct deposit of formerly illegal political contributions to campaign accounts.
Experience is the thing you have left when everything else is gone.
- ARBITRAITOR A cook that leaves Arby’s to work at McDonald’s
- BERNADETTE The act of torching a mortgage.
- BURGLARIZE What a crook sees through
- AVOIDABLE What a bullfighter tries to do
- EYEDROPPER Clumsy ophthalmologist
- CONTROL A short, ugly inmate.
- COUNTERFEITER Workers who put together kitchen cabinets
- ECLIPSE What an English barber does for a living.
- LEFT BANK What the bank robbers did when their bag was full of money.
- HEROES What a man in a boat does
- PARASITES What you see from the Eiffel Tower
- PARADOX Two physicians
- PHARMACIST A helper on a farm
- POLARIZE What penguins see through
- PRIMATE Remove your spouse from in front of TV
- RELIEF What trees do in the spring
- RUBBERNECK What you do to relax your wife
An American in Scotland asked one of the locals, “Why do you call it a kilt?”
The Scotsman replied, “Because we kilt the last bloke who called it a dress.”
The crowded cafeteria sported a large sign reading: “Watch Your Hat And Overcoat.” Meyer did. He kept turning every minute, almost choking over his food. His pal, Moshe, kept on eating, without thought of his own coat on the hook.
Finally Moshe said, “You, dope…stop watching our overcoats.”
“I’m only watching mine,” replied Meyer. “Yours has been gone for over half an hour.”
Scientists are working to develop something that will dissolve anything, but they don’t know what they would put it in.
A teacher asked her class, “What do you want out of life”?
A little girl in the back raised her hand and said, “All I want out of life is four animals.”
The teacher asked “Really? And what four animals would that be”?
The little girl replied, “A mink on my back, a jaguar in the garage, a tiger in bed and a jackass to pay for all of it.” The teacher fainted.
What lies behind you and what lies in front of you, pales in comparison to what lies inside of you.
Ralph Waldo Emerson
Stay well, do good work, and have fun.
Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.
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