Ray's musings and humor

On Sabbatical

“The unexamined life is not worth living.”

Aristotle

! 00000 On Sebbatical

When I wrote that I was feeling a little down because of what I was not doing or could not do lately a friend wrote and suggested that I just accepted todays reality as being temporary. Instead of worrying about what is not happening it is better to take advantage of the downtime. This is timely and good advice, by not spending time moping around I have the opportunity to do some things on my ”I’ll do it someday list.” So my friends advice has convinced me to take a sabbatical and not look at what I am not doing as missed obligations but rather as non-mandatory activities that are skipped as I do some rebuilding.

Here is a story for those of us who stay so busy doing what we do that we slow down never taking a break to recharge.

Busy

by: Stephen Covey

Once upon a time a very strong woodcutter ask for a job in a timber merchant, and he got it. The paid was really good and so were the work conditions. For that reason, the woodcutter was determined to do his best.

His boss gave him an axe and showed him the area where he was supposed to work.

The first day, the woodcutter brought 18 trees

“Congratulations,” the boss said. “Go on that way!”

Very motivated for the boss’ words, the woodcutter try harder the next day, but he only could bring 15 trees. The third day he try even harder, but he only could bring 10 trees.Day after day he was bringing less and less trees.

“I must be losing my strength”, the woodcutter thought. He went to the boss and apologized, saying that he could not understand what was going on.

“When was the last time you sharpened your axe?” the boss asked.

“Sharpen? I had no time to sharpen my axe. I have been very busy trying to cut trees…”

~~~

There is no need to run outside for better seeing… Rather abide at the center of your being for the more you leave it the less you learn. Search your heart and see… The way to do is to be.

Lao Tzu

~~~

An 80 year old man went to the doctor for a checkup and the doctor was amazed at what good shape the guy was in. The doctor asked, “To what do you attribute your good health?”

The old timer said, “I’m a golfer and that’s why I’m in such good shape.   I’m up well before daylight and out golfing up and down the fairways.”

The doctor said, “Well, I’m sure that helps, but there’s got to be more to it. How old was your father when he died?”

The old timer said, “Who said my father’s dead?”

The doctor said, “You mean you’re 80 years old and your father is still alive?  How old is he?”

The old timer said, “He’s 100 yrs old and, in fact, he golfed with me this morning. That’s why he’s still alive, he’s a golfer.”

The doctor said, “Well, that’s great, but I’m sure there’s more to it. How about your grandfather? How old was he when he died?”

The old timer said, “Who said my grandpa’s dead?”

The doctor said, “You mean you’re 80 years old and your grandfather’s still living! How old is he?”

The old timer said, “He’s 118 yrs old.”

The doctor was getting frustrated at this point and said, “I guess he went golfing with you this morning too?”

The old timer said, “No…Grandpa couldn’t go this morning because he got married.”

The doctor said in amazement, “Got married!! Why would a 118-year-old guy want to get married?”

The old timer shot back, “Who said he wanted to?”

~~~

Management has created a wonderful solution, now they’re looking for a problem to go with it.

~~~

“Hey, Mom,” asked Little Johnny, “can you give me twenty dollars?”

“Certainly not,” she said.

“If you do,” he went on, “I’ll tell you what dad said to the maid when you were at the beauty shop.”

His mother’s ears perked up and, grabbing her purse, she handed over the money.

“Well? What did he say?”

“He said, ‘Hey, Marie, make sure you wash my socks tomorrow.'”

~~~

What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.

Ralph Waldo Emerson

~~~

My alphabet starts with this letter called yuzz.

It’s the letter I use to spell yuzz-a-ma-tuzz.

You’ll be sort of surprised what there is to be found,

once you go beyond ‘Z’ and start poking around.

Dr. Seuss

~~~

“I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.”

Noel Coward

~~~

Two rural church deacons who were having a sociable beer in the local tavern when they saw their minister drive by and take a good long look at their pickup trucks parked outside.

One deacon ducked down and said, “I hope the reverend didn’t see us or recognize my pickup.”

The other replied indifferently, “What difference does it make. God knows we’re in here… and he’s the only one who counts.”

The first deacon countered, “Yeah, but God won’t tell my wife.”

~~~

“Daddy, Charlie asked me to marry him, but I told him I couldn’t leave Mama.”

“Oh, that’s okay. Take her with you.”

~~~

A young boy, who had a lisp, was supposed to start school one day, and was told by his mother to wait by the bus stop. The kid goes to the bus stop, sees the bus and starts waving his arms and shouting: “Buth driver .. Buth Driver thtop thtop! …” The bus just keeps on going.

The next day, after his mother was upset for the bus not stopping, tells him to go to the bus stop and wave an old rag she gave him. Again, he follow his mother’s instructions, waving the old rag and shouting “Hey buth driver…buth driver, thtop thtop!!..” Again, the bus just goes by. When he returned home, his mother was really upset and tells him:

“Damn it, tomorrow I want you to go out and stand in the middle of the street, and he’ll stop for sure.” The next day, he’s waiting for the bus, sees it, stands in the middle of the street and starts waving the rag and shouting: “Hey buth driver…buth driver…thtop thtop!!”

The bus just keeps going, hits him, knocks him down and breaks every bone in his body. Upset, after his mother found out about this, she went to the school to complain to the school’s principal, who calls the bus driver to the office and questions him about about his action.

“Why did you hit that poor boy?” the principal asked.

The bus driver replies: “I can’t thtand kidth that make fun of me!”

~~~

I wish you well and so I take my leave, I Pray you know me when we meet again.

William Shakespeare

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

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