Ray's musings and humor

Older Again

“Keep your heart always warm.”
Lailah Gifty Akita

! 0000 begin

Today is February first and as happens every year I woke up this morning a year older. My family gathered and provided me a birthday party this past weekend that included entertainment provided by my mobile infant grandson. The contrast between his energy and my lack of energy reminded me how eight decades of life has slowed me down. I keep forgetting my age, amongst other things, but my body has a tendency to remind me more than I like it too.
I have found that the secret is to sustain an outlook that allows me to find pleasure in what I can do without a lot of remorse for what I can’t do, in all honesty no one’s more surprised than I am that I have lived this long and can still enjoy as much as I do. So I am off to the gym this morning where I will make an effort to work the kinks out of my joints while putting some strength back in my legs.
Like I said I think they key to life is a positive outlook. Here is a story a friend sent me ten years ago that I have always liked, I think you will too.

When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, remember the mayonnaise jar and 2 cups of coffee.
A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, wordlessly, he picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls. He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was. The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls.
He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was. The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else.
He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with a unanimous “yes.”
The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed.
“Now,” said the professor, as the laughter subsided, “I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The golf balls are the important things – God, family, children, health, friends, and favorite passions — things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full. The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, house, and car. The sand is everything else — the small stuff.
“If you put the sand into the jar first,” he continued, “there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are important to you. So…Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness.
Play With your children. Take time to get medical checkups. Take your partner out to dinner. Play another 18. There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal.
“Take care of the golf balls first– the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand.”
One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coffee represented.
The professor smiled. “I’m glad you asked. It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem, there’s always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend.”

~~~

“Life can be awful. Life can be ugly.And still there are those who smile at the darkness, anticipating the beauty of an eventual sunrise.”

Richelle E. Goodrich

~~~

An airline pilot was scheduled to take a flight from New York to Los Angeles. The weather was too bad in New York to allow his usual on time departure. The weather in New York finally cleared and the pilot asked for his departure clearance. He was very dismayed to hear that he had another delay due to the increased traffic now leaving New York.
Sometime later he finally received his clearance and decided he would try to make up the time lost by asking for a direct route to Los Angeles. Halfway across the country he was told to turn due South.
Knowing that this turn would now throw him further behind schedule he inquired, quite agitated, to the controller for the reason of the turn off course. The controller replied that the turn was for noise abatement.
The pilot was infuriated and said to the controller, “Look buddy, I am already way behind schedule with all the delays you guys have given me today. I really don’t see how I could be causing a noise problem for pedestrians when I am over six miles above the earth!”
The controller answered in a calm voice, “Apparently, Captain, you have never heard two 747s collide!”

~~~

“When the archer misses the mark, he turns and looks for the fault within himself. Failure to hit the bull’s eye is never the fault of the target. To improve your aim — improve yourself.”

Gilbert Garland
~~~

A woman who plays cards one night a month with a group of friends was concerned that she always woke up her husband when she came home around 11:30. One night she decided to try not to rouse him. She undressed in the living room and, purse over arm, tiptoed nude into the bedroom – only to find her husband sitting up in bed reading.
“Dammit woman!” he exclaimed. “Did you lose everything?”

~~~
My mail is a little slow. Last month my flower seeds came as a bouquet.
~~~

A Sunday school teacher said to her children, “We have been learning how powerful kings and queens were in Bible times. But, there is a higher power. Can anybody tell me what it is?”
One child blurted out, “Aces!”

~~~
Misers aren’t much fun to live with, but they make great ancestors.
~~~

My niece, pregnant with her second child, was certain she wanted an epidural for pain management during childbirth. Her doctor asked her at which stage of labor she wanted the epidural administered.
Her response: “Just meet me in the parking lot!”

~~~

I value the friend who for me finds time on his calendar, but I cherish the friend who for me does not consult his calendar.

Robert Brault
~~~

The guest lecturer to a famous Medical College stopped by the bulletin board on his way to the lecture room.
Listed for the day was the topic, “Surprises in Obstetrics.” Scrawled under it in pencil were the words,
“Mary had a little lamb.”

~~~

An expert is a man who tells you a simple thing in a confused way in such a fashion as to make you think the confusion is your own fault.

William Castle
~~~

He said… Do you love me just because my father left me a fortune?
She said…Not at all honey, I’d love you no matter who left you the money.

~~~

“I can and will improve the world. I will smile, show kindness, and be grateful. I refuse to be unhappy.”

Richelle E. Goodrich
~~~
Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

Ray Mitchell
Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.
Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

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