Ray's musings and humor

Be You!

Perhaps love is the process of my leading you gently back to yourself.
Antoine De Saint-Exupery

! 000 be_yourself 2

I hope you are warm where you are, we have been experiencing subzero arctic like weather. Of course one of the side benefits of being homebound lately is like living in the tropics while the world freezes around you. The bad news is that it also results in cabin fever so I use old movies, books and the internet to keep me occupied.
I do try to get to the gym early every morning before my wife wakes and I am working on increasing my activities or at least hope to be soon. In the meantime I wish our world was in less turmoil. If other people were like you we all would be better off.
I was just sent the following that I think has value and should provide hope for us that are all striving to do better:
Allow Your Own Inner Light to Guide You
• There comes a time when you must stand alone.
• You must feel confident enough within yourself to follow your own dreams.
• You must be willing to make sacrifices.
• You must be capable of changing and rearranging your priorities so that your final goal can be achieved.
• Sometimes, familiarity and comfort need to be challenged.
• There are times when you must take a few extra chances and create your own realities.
• Be strong enough to at least try to make your life better.
• Be confident enough that you won’t settle for a compromise just to get by.
• Appreciate yourself by allowing yourself the opportunities to grow, develop, and find your true sense of purpose in this life.
• Don’t stand in someone else’s shadow when it’s your sunlight that should lead the way.
• Work hard at what you like to do and try to overcome all obstacles
• Laugh at your mistakes and praise yourself for learning from them
• Pick some flowers and appreciate the beauty of nature
• Say hello to strangers and enjoy the people you know
• Don’t be afraid to show your emotions laughing and crying make you feel better
• Love your friends and family with your entire being they are the most important part of your life
• Feel the calmness on a quiet sunny day
• Find a rainbow and live your world of dreams always remember life is better than it seems

~~~

In spite of unseasonable wind, snow and unexpected weather of all sorts – a gardener still plants. And tends what they have planted … believing that Spring will come.

Mary Anne Radmacher
~~~

Two beggars are sitting side by side on a street in Mexico City. One has a cross in front of him, the other one the Star of David. Many people go by and look at both beggars, but only put money into the hat of the beggar sitting behind the cross. A priest comes by, stops and watches throngs of people giving money to the beggar behind the cross, but none give to the beggar behind the Star of David.
Finally, the priest goes over to the beggar behind the Star of David and says, “My poor fellow, don’t you understand? This is a Catholic country. People aren’t going to give you money if you sit there with a Star of David in front of you, especially when you’re sitting beside a beggar who has a cross. In fact, they would probably give to him just out of spite.”
The beggar behind the Star of David listened to the priest, turned to the beggar with the cross and said, “Moishe, look who’s trying to teach the Goldstein brothers about marketing.”

~~~

Lots of people want to ride with you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down.

Oprah Winfrey
~~~

The bride was anything but a tidy housekeeper. It didn’t bother her much until one evening when her husband called from the hall, somewhat dismayed: “Honey, what happened to the dust on this table? I had a phone number written on it.”

~~~
My son complains all the time about headaches. I tell him all the time, “when you get out of bed, it’s feet first!”

Henry Youngman
~~~
The letter, shown below, is an actual letter that was sent to a bank by a 96 year old woman. The bank manager thought it amusing enough to have it published in the New York Times.

Dear Sir:
I am writing to thank you for bouncing my check with which I endeavored to pay my plumber last month. By my calculations, three nanoseconds must have elapsed between his presenting the check and the arrival in my account of the funds needed to honor it. I refer, of course, to the automatic monthly deposit of my social security check, an arrangement which, I admit, has been in place for only eight years. You are to be commended for seizing that brief window of opportunity, and also for debiting my account $30 by way of penalty for the inconvenience caused to your bank.
My thankfulness springs from the manner in which this incident has caused me to rethink my errant financial ways. I noticed that whereas I personally attend to your telephone calls and letters, when I try to contact you, I am confronted by the impersonal, overcharging, prerecorded, faceless entity which your bank has become. From now on, I, like you, choose only to deal with a flesh-and-blood person. My mortgage and loan repayments will therefore and hereafter no longer be automatic, but will arrive at your bank, by check, addressed personally and confidentially to an employee at your bank whom you must nominate.
Be aware that it is an offense under the Postal Act for any other person to open such an envelope. Please find attached an Application Contact Status which I require your chosen employee to complete. I am sorry it runs to eight pages, but in order that I know as much about him or her as your bank knows about me, there is no alternative. Please note that all copies of his or her medical history must be countersigned by a Notary Public, and the mandatory details of his/her financial situation (income, debts, assets and liabilities) must be accompanied by documented proof. In due course, I will issue your employee with a PIN number which he/she must quote in dealings with me. I regret that it cannot be shorter than 28 digits but, again, I have modeled it on the number of button presses required of me to access my account balance on your phone bank service.
As they say, imitation is the sincerest form of flattery. Let me level the playing field even further. When you call me, press buttons as follows:
1. To make an appointment to see me.
2. To query a missing payment.
3. To transfer the call to my living room in case I am there.
4. To transfer the call to my bedroom in case I am sleeping.
5. To transfer the call to my toilet in case I am attending to nature.
6. To transfer the call to my mobile phone if I am not at home.
7. To leave a message on my computer, a password to access my computer is required. Password will be communicated to you at a later date to the Authorized Contact.
8. To return to the main menu and to listen to options 1 through 7.
9. To make a general complaint or inquiry. The contact will then be put on hold, pending the attention of my automated answering service. While this may, on occasion, involve a lengthy wait, uplifting music will play for the duration of the call.
Regrettably, but again following your example, I must also levy an establishment fee to cover the setting up of this new arrangement.
May I wish you a happy, if ever so slightly less prosperous New Year?
Your Humble Client
(Remember: This was written by a 96 year old woman)

~~~
“Don’t criticize your wife. If she were perfect, she would have married much better than you.”
~~~

Determined to cut the budget, the former governor directed that all government jobs remain unfilled once vacated. There were many complaints, one concerning the retirement of a drawbridge operator. When Personnel refused to fill the position, the highway- division manager called the governor’s office.
“Ask the governor,” he told an aide, “whether he wants the bridge left down so the cars can go over – or up so the ships can go through.”

~~~

“Don’t be too hard on yourself. There are plenty of people willing to do that for you. Love yourself and be proud of everything that you do. Even mistakes mean you’re trying.”
Susan Gale
~~~
Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

Ray Mitchell
Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.
Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

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