Ray's musings and humor

Slower is not all that bad

“There is a fountain of youth: it is your mind, your talents, the creativity you bring to your life and the lives of people you love. When you learn to tap this source, you will truly have defeated age.”

Sophia Loren

! Aging

I am pleased to report I made it through another weekend. When you get up in years it isn’t as easy to do what you always did so each day can be an adventure. A weekend that does not include the physical challenges associated with the elderly is a blessing.

I am not complaining since I am finding the golden years to have a lot to offer. Not the least of which is the view of what goes in in the world from an easy chair. I just wish there was less global strife and fewer folks who suffer. I am lucky that so many people provide me opportunities to stay busy and mentally active. I still find it hard to believe that I am as old as my body keeps reminding me that I am.

I find aging to be a process that requires some adjustments to get the most out of the twilight years. Here are some tips on how to do it from the FitBuff blog.

Tips for Aging Gracefully

Father Time waits for no one. Like it or not, we are all getting older with every passing second. But, before you reach for your favorite “rainy day” pills, aging gracefully is very possible.

Sure, it requires a little extra work and preparation on your part, but so does anything else worth achieving. Maybe you’re a rock star who wants to party hard and go out in a blaze of youthful glory.

Now, fast forward 10, 25, or 50 years. You made it. You’re still alive. Your tattoos are barely legible on your sagging, wrinkle-ridden skin. And your retirement-home buddies aren’t interested in your wild stories of “The Burning Man,” because they can barely hear you as you struggle to speak between your smoking-induced coughs. Don’t you wish you had done a few things differently?

Aging gracefully certainly doesn’t mean giving up on a fun and adventurous lifestyle. It means doing things now that will allow you to continue that fun and adventurous lifestyle well into your youthful old age.

10 Tips for Aging Gracefully

1.Eliminate Self Destructive Behaviors

2.Eat Properly

3.Exercise

4.Manage Stress

5.Think Young

6.Get Rest

7.Practice Good Hygiene

8.Prudent Supplementation

9.Proactive Living

10.Balance

~~~

“Wrinkles should merely indicate where the smiles have been.”

Mark Twain

~~~

A distinguished rabbi and a friend were playing golf. It was a very close match, and at the last hole the two were only one stroke apart. The rabbi teed up, addressed the ball, and swung his driver with great force…slicing the ball deep into the woods.

The rabbi glared, and bit his lip while his face turned crimson, but said nothing. His opponent looked at him for a moment and then remarked, “Rabbi, that is the most profane silence I have ever heard.”

~~~

He said, “My father is so old that when he was in school, history was called current affairs.”

~~~

The blonde had been married about a year when one day she came running up to her husband jumping for joy. Not knowing how to react, the husband started jumping up and down along with her. “Why are we so happy?” he asked.

“Honey, I have some really great news for you!” She said. “Great!” he said, “Tell me what you’re so happy about.”

She stopped jumping and was breathless from all the jumping up and down. “I’m pregnant!” she gasped.

The husband was ecstatic as they had been trying for awhile. He grabbed her, kissed her, and started telling her how wonderful it was, and that he couldn’t be happier.

Then she said “Oh, honey there’s more!”

“What do you mean more?”, he asked.

“Well we are not having just one baby, we are going to have TWINS!”

Amazed at how she could know so soon after getting pregnant, he asked her how she knew.

“It was easy” she said, “I went to the pharmacy and bought the 2-pack home pregnancy test kit and both tests came out positive!”

~~~

Waiter: Would you like your coffee black?

Customer: What other colors do you have?

~~~

A wee guy was sitting at a bar staring at his drink for ages. Suddenly, a big biker came along, snatched his glass, guzzled down the contents and laughed, “Hah! So what you gonna do about that, little man?”

“Nothing,” sighed the little guy despondently. “You see, today has been the worst day of my life. This morning I overslept and was late for an important meeting. My boss was furious and so he sacked me. I cleared my desk, went to my car, only to discover that it wasn’t there – somebody had stolen it. So I got a taxi home, but when it came to paying the driver I realized I’d forgotten my wallet. I then went into my house and I found my wife in bed with the gardener. So I left home and came to this bar. And just when I was thinking about ending it all, you came along and drank my poison…”

~~~

If you want to make peace, you don’t talk to your friends. You talk to your enemies.

Moshe Dayan

~~~

It takes a really tall tale to win the annual Burlington, Wis., Liars Club Contest.  So tip your hat to Gordon Zwicky, because he’s a worthy champion. A neighbor, said Zwicky, told him and his wife Dorothy that they’d be fine as long as they paid attention to the road signs along the way.  But they’d driven just 30 miles when they saw one that read, “Clean Restrooms Ahead.”

Two months later, they arrived in Florida exhausted, having used up 86 bottles of Windex, 267 rolls of paper towels, and three cases of toilet-bowl cleaner.

Total restrooms cleaned:  450.

~~~

To keep the heart unwrinkled, to be hopeful, kindly, cheerful, reverent – that is to triumph over old age.

Thomas Bailey Aldrich

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

Ray’s Daily has been sent for more than fifteen years to people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

 

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

Tag Cloud

%d bloggers like this: