“It is not in the stars to hold our destiny but in ourselves.”
Here we go again. I will spend another day waiting for the steroids and pain pills to let me cross the bridge to a more normal existence. I will get the added benefit of visiting with one of my Doctors this afternoon so we can plan the next steps to my recovery. The length of the time to go semi-painless was to be expected so I just have to keep going and not get bogged down.
Here is an article that I edited that is in the spirit of what my day must be.
6 Habits That Will Help You on Days When You Just Feel Like Giving Up
by Henrik Edberg
I’d like to share 6 habits that have helped me to hold on or to change direction on those difficult days.
Tap into realistic expectations. Tap into realistic expectations not by listening to advertising that promises you quick results. Not by listening to the perfectionism – from the people around you or yourself – that allows no mistakes or failures.
Tap into it by listening to the people who have already gone where you want to go. Listen to the people who know what works and how you will stumble and fail along the way and can tell you how long your journey may take.
Remind yourself why you are doing this. It’s easy to lose the big picture in the busy everyday life. But if you feel like giving up then try reconnecting with why you are doing what you are doing.
Maybe it is to:
- Support and keep your family safe.
- Live healthier and longer so you get to watch your kids grow up.
- See the world and explore new things.
Remember: It’s darkest before the dawn. This thought has helped me to hold on when things have felt very difficult and I felt like giving up and going home. Because I have found it to be true.
When things seemed to be at the lowest point with my blog and business, with my dating life or with my motivation in life in general something always happened. Probably quite often because being at that low point forced me to change something in how I did things. But maybe also because life seems to have some kind of balance if I just keep going. If I just keep taking action instead of giving up and doing nothing then something good always happens.
Reconnect with the basics or change the path. When I have run into a plateau or a longer rough patch these two things have been helpful:
Simplify and reconnect with the basics. It is easy to become overwhelmed by all the information out there about any change you can make in life. That can lead to confusion and trying to do too many things at once. In those situations it has been helpful for me to simplify. To just focus on a few or one of the things I have learned that are the basic fundamentals in this area of life. To improve my social skills those things were for example to keep a positive attitude and to assume rapport.
Learn more and course-correct. Reconnecting with the basics often works well. But sometimes it has been helpful to change my course slightly instead.
Tell yourself: Just for today! Here’s a little phrase I got from Brian Tracy that I often use when I’m having a bad day with a new habit. I say to myself: Just for today I will XX! Replace XX with what you will do just for today such as getting exercise, getting going with the most important task first thing in the day or eating a healthy lunch. By telling myself that I only have to do it today I get two big benefits:
- I release the mental burden of the past times I did it and future times when I will do it. And so the task becomes much lighter and the inner resistance melts away.
- It also reminds me that the period that I am investing in changing a habit is not the rest of my life. After 30 days or so the habit will mostly be automatic so it is not something I have to do on willpower for the next few years or decades.
See if it is time to quit and to try something else. Sometimes it is not time to give up. But it may be time to quit what you are doing and to try something else. If you feel like giving up or you are bored a lot, if you feel no real passion or excitement or curiosity about a change or your current path then ask yourself these two questions:
- Am doing this because I truly want it?
- Or am I doing it because someone told me to or because so many people around me seem to have done it or are working on it?
What you want isn’t easy to know before you get started though. You may need to try different paths before you find one that fits you. And just because everyone around you seem to love running doesn’t mean that you have to love it or that you have to give up on the habit of regular exercise. Try walking, biking, playing badminton or table tennis instead. Try a new way of doing what you want and see if it is a better fit and more enjoyable for you.
If you’re going through hell, keep going.
Even though we can now explain differences between men and women’s social conducts genetically (that’s the best excuse I’ve heard for years), several facts remain puzzling, and distinguished professors in the field think answer may be a few centuries away yet…for instance, can you explain why:
- Men are biologically incapable of letting a women light a barbecue.
- Men drive to a party, women drive back.
- Men have flu, women have colds.
- Men warm their posteriors at the fire, women do not. Women’s posteriors enable them to sit comfortably on the floor, men’s do not.
- A man who regularly visits his mother is a mommy’s boy. A women who does the same is a good daughter.
- A man who has no difficulty in undressing an adult women will nevertheless prove incapable of fitting a small child into a nightgown.
- A woman believes that visitors will be impressed by a clean house. A man believes that the visitors will be impressed with his large stereo system.
- Exactly the same haircut will cost $30 more for a woman than it will for a man.
It’s a Tough Job! ….. So I’d Rather YOU do it.
On some air bases the Air Force is on one side of the field and civilian aircraft use the other side of the field, with the control tower in the middle. One day the tower received a call from an aircraft asking, “What time is it?”
The tower responded, “Who is calling?”
The aircraft replied, “What difference does it make?”
The tower replied, “It makes a lot of difference. If it is an American Airlines Flight, it is 3 o’clock. If it is an Air Force, it is 1500 hours. If it is a Navy aircraft, it is 6 bells. If it is an Army aircraft, the big hand is on the 12 and the little hand is on the 3. If it is a Marine Corps aircraft, it’s Thursday afternoon.”
I saw a woman wearing a sweatshirt with ‘GUESS’ on it. I said, “Thyroid problem?”
A story concerns itself with a wholesaler in New York who sent a letter to the postmaster of a small mid-western town. He asked for the name of an honest lawyer who would take a collection case against a local debtor who had refused to pay for a shipment of the wholesaler’s goods. He got this reply:
“I am the postmaster of this village and received your letter. I am also an honest lawyer and ordinarily would be pleased to accept a case against a local debtor. In this case, however, I also happen to be the person you sold those crummy goods to. I received your demand to pay and refused to honor it. I am also the banker you sent the draft to draw on the merchant, and I sent that back with a note stating that the merchant had refused to pay. And if I were not, for the time being, substituting for the pastor of our local church, I would tell you just where you could stick your claim.”
Don’t wish it was easier, wish you were better. Don’t wish for less problems, wish for more skills. Don’t wish for less challenges, wish for more wisdom. The major value in life is not what you get. The major value in life is what you become. Success is not to be pursued; it is to be attracted by the person you become.
Stay well, do good work, and have fun.
Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.
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