Ray's musings and humor

Archive for October, 2014

We need everybody

“We cannot solve our problems with the same level of thinking that created them”

Albert Einstein


I had breakfast with an organizational development expert the other day where I heard about an enterprise that was struggling because there was a disconnect between their leadership and their employees. As I drove home I thought about a retired CEO that told me he had heard complaints from recent college graduates that the older generation would not get out of their way, as if they did not feel that they had to earn their leadership roles. On the other side of the coin I have seen many organization struggle these days as leaders sought to solve todays problems with yesterday’s solutions. Things are moving too fast to expect what worked yesterday will work tomorrow.

In my view the only solution lies in building a workplace environment that allows full participation in the problem solving effort. We need to combine the wisdom of the seasoned with the knowledge of the current generation. Here is a slightly edited article that I feel holds the answer for many of today’s struggling organizations.


You Can’t Solve Today’s Problems with Yesterday’s Solutions

by Ron Thomas

If you think of how change has come to our lives, especially with the advent of social media, everything is different. The organization and its people, however, are struggling as to how to keep pace. If leaders use the model of being at the center of the web, or if your organization puts its people first, these are innovations that would be unheard of in years past.

The old org chart is a thing of the past. The Scottish-American engineer Daniel McCallum is credited for creating the first organizational charts of American business around 1854. Based on that calculation, the org chart is approximately 158 years old. With project-based work, team approaches and virtual work, it almost makes the org chart obsolete.

Helping someone to get what they want

On the other hand, if you look at the concept of Employees First, Customers Second it notes that ”[EFCS] … turned the traditional management hierarchy upside down. The aim of EFCS was to create trust, to make managers as accountable to employees as employees were to their bosses, to transfer the responsibility for change and value creation to front-line employees working in the what they describe as the ‘value zone’ where HCL and its customers interact. Systems and processes were put in place designed to achieve these goals.”

Starbucks is another company that works with this concept. Even part-time employees get health insurance. Costco’s CEO recently said he was an advocate of the raising of the minimum wage. Both these organizations pay above average wages and have other initiatives that mirror the employee first philosophy. If you think of any organization that makes employer of choice or best places to work lists, you can see leadership from the web. You can also see the inverted pyramid.

In order to get what you want you have to help someone get what they want. That means that organizations must do whatever they can to help their collective group of employees get or achieve what they want. This model has a host of benefits — increased productivity, increased employee engagement, innovation and creativity. The derivative of this is the bottom line looks a lot stronger.

We are all in this together

Organizations of the future are going to need to adapt a new model of doing business. This is the era of “talent,” and that talent as a whole will not be mistreated in any way. They walk out every day and are not tied to anyone. Everyone within the organization has to buy into the concept of helping each other. It is not just leadership at the top; it is leadership from every corner of the organization. Team leader, project lead, VP or C-level — all must adhere to that new mindset.

No organization will survive, talent-wise, unless adjustments are made. There will always be adjustments made going forward; there is no one size fits all. You can’t duplicate another company’s culture no matter how hard you try. But, what you can do is pay close attention to your organizational culture, experiment, and make adjustments.

Whether you are leading from the web or putting your employees first, remember this: today’s issues cannot be solved with an Industrial Age mindset.


People who work together will win, whether it be against complex football defenses, or the problems of modern society.

Vince Lombardi


She said:

If you write in the dust, please don’t date it!

I would cook dinner but I can’t find the can opener!

My house was clean last week, too bad you missed it!

A clean kitchen is the sign of a wasted life.


I came, I saw, I decided to order take out.

If you don’t like my standards of cooking…lower your standards.


The 50-50-90 Rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there’s a 90% probability you’ll get it wrong.


In the world of physics, we’ve all heard of the “Doppler Effect” which causes train whistles to sound higher in pitch as the train approaches and then sound lower in pitch as the train recedes. There is, however, a lesser-known effect called the “Dopeler Effect.” The Dopeler Effect is the tendency of stupid ideas to sound much smarter when they came at you quickly


If at first you don’t succeed, you’ve failed again


A pastor went out one Saturday to visit his church members.  At one house it was obvious that someone was home, but nobody came to the door even though the pastor had knocked several times.  Finally, the pastor took out his card and wrote “Revelations 3:20” on the back of it, and stuck it in the door.

{Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and dine with him and him with me.}

The next day, the card turned up in the collection plate.  Below the pastor’s message was the notation “Genesis 3:10”.

{I heard your voice in the garden, and I was afraid, because I was naked; and I hid myself.}


I plead contemporary insanity.


“My uncle in Detroit tried to make a new kind of car. He took the engine from a Ford, the transmission from an Oldsmobile, the tires from a Cadillac, and the exhaust system from a Plymouth.”

“Really? What did he get?”

“Fifteen years.”


“Sometimes I get the feeling that the whole world is against me, but deep down I know that’s not true. Some of the smaller countries are neutral.”

Robert Orben


“Leaders are problem solvers by talent and temperament, and by choice. For them, the new information environment—undermining old means of control, opening up old closets of secrecy, reducing the relevance of ownership, early arrival, and location—should seem less a litany of problems than an agenda for action. Reaching for a way to describe the entrepreneurial energy of his fabled editor Harold Ross, James Thurber said: ‘He was always leaning forward, pushing something invisible ahead of him.’ That’s the appropriate posture for a knowledge executive.”

Harlan Cleveland


Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

This daily is sent only to special people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.


Mason still needs us all

 Mason 2

Hi all, I do appreciate the many of you that have been following Mason’s fight for life. He needs every ones prayers. Here is an update from his Great Grand Father my good friend Ken.


Hey Ray,

Will you be able to distribute Mason’s recent update to your audience? We need all the prayer we can generate, this is a critical month for him.

Thanks for your help,


Below is the update sent after Mason’s 3rd chemo session. However he is now in his 4th session and subsequently will undergo a 10 hour surgery to remove a large intertwined tumor. (Further down is a copy of a recent email from my son which describes Mason’s condition in more detail. Jean and I did not know about a tumor. Our understanding was skeletal cancer throughout his body, similar to the bone marrow cancer my brother had).


As you know our Great-grandson Mason was surprisingly diagnosed with stage 4 Cancer after only a fews weeks of minor illness. Thank you for all your prayers and good wishes for Mason’s recovery. The immediate family has just provided this update on Mason’s condition and express their thanks for everyone’s thoughts and prayers.

Mason just came home from the hospital after completing his second round  of Chemo, He will be home for 2 week and than go back in for his 3rd session. He has responded well to the treatment in regards to it not making him real sick and his spirits are good. We really won’t know any real progress on the tumor for a while as we all know this is a long slow process.

Again we are thankful for everyone’s thoughts and prayers for Mason and in recognition that September is Childhood Cancer Awareness month lets include a prayer for a Cure for this disease.

We will keep you posted on Mason’s condition after each Chemo session is complete.

God Bless you all.


Here is a quick overview of what Mason is battling. Neuroblastoma is a rare disease in which a solid tumor (a lump or mass caused by uncontrolled or abnormal cell growth) is formed by special nerve cells called neuroblasts. Normally, these immature cells grow and mature into functioning nerve cells. But in neuroblastoma, they become cancer cells instead.

Neuroblastoma most commonly starts in the tissue of the adrenal glands, the triangular glands on top of the kidneys that produce hormones responsible for controlling heart rate, blood pressure, and other important functions. Like other cancers, neuroblastoma can spread (metastasize) to other parts of the body, such as the lymph nodes, skin, liver, and bones

In Mason’s case the tumor is quite large (about watermelon size) and that grown around and entangled several organ within his abdominal cavity. After his 4th round of chemo they will work to remove this mass.



Don’t be afraid

Fear keeps us focused on the past or worried about the future. If we can acknowledge our fear, we can realize that right now we are okay. Right now, today, we are still alive, and our bodies are working marvelously. Our eyes can still see the beautiful sky. Our ears can still hear the voices of our loved ones.

Thich Nhat Hanh


Here we are another Friday. This morning I will have my last Cardiac Rehabilitation session for the week and then meet with one of the good guys. He is a relatively new friend that is considering offering his wisdom and his concern for others to help our community better serve the over 50 crowd. I enjoy visiting with him and appreciate the way he thinks and since I am way over 50 I have a special interest in what he does.

Because I have to go soon I am sending you the Daily I published on this day thirteen years ago.

 October 17, 2001

I had a great day yesterday at Cypress Gardens, if you are ever in Central Florida stop by, I think you will be glad you did. It is more oriented to adults but I think kids would enjoy it as well.

Speaking of kids. These are truly difficult times for us all, especially the children. It is important that we do not let the news of the day and our reactions frighten and traumatize them.

We adults have the ability to put things into perspective as it relates to the potential for any one of us suffering personal injury from what is going on. We know that more than 150 people are killed in auto accidents everyday, and thousands more are injured. Those of us who are older have lived through a World War when none of us were sure that the war would not reach our shores. We remember polio epidemics that resulted in beaches, movie theatres, and more being closed at times during our summer school vacation.

Unfortunately kids don’t have the mental defenses that we have built based on our experiences. I believe it is important to let them know they are safe. We must not let any fears we may have spill over into their lives. We should avoid canceling that planned vacation. We should continue to take our kids to the places that we would of before September 11th. I am not suggesting that we try to hide the facts from children, which would be impossible; I am only suggesting that we let them know they are safe by our words and our actions.


Anyone can hold the helm when the sea is calm.

Publilius Syrus


She defines the following as:

Argument (ar*gyou*ment) n. — A discussion that occurs when you’re right, but he just hasn’t realized it yet.

Airhead (er*hed) n. — What a woman intentionally becomes when pulled over by a policeman.

Bar-be-que (bar*bi*q) n. — You bought the groceries, washed the lettuce, chopped the tomatoes, diced the onions, marinated the meat, and cleaned everything up, but he “made the dinner”.

Cantaloupe (kant*e*lope) n. — Gotta get married in a church.

Childbirth (child*brth) n. — You get to go through 36 hours of contractions; he gets to hold your hand and say “focus…breathe….push….”

Clothes dryer (kloze dri*yer) n. — An appliance designed to eat socks.

Diet Soda (dy*it so*da) n. — A drink you buy at a convenience store to go with a half pound bag of peanut M&M’s.

Eternity (e*ter*ni*tee) n. — The last two minutes of a football game.

Exercise (ex*er*siz) v. — To walk up and down a mall, occasionally resting to make a purchase.

Grocery list (grow*ser*ee list) n. — What you spend half an hour writing, then forget to take with you to the store.

Hair Dresser (hare dres*er) n. — Someone who is able to create a style you will never be able to duplicate again. See “Magician”.

Hardware Store (hard*war stor) n. — Similar to a black hole in space: if he goes in, he isn’t coming out anytime soon.

Lipstick (lip*stik) n. — On your lips, coloring to enhance the beauty of your mouth. On his collar, coloring only a tramp would wear…!

Park (park) v./n. — Before children, a verb meaning “to go somewhere and neck.” After children, a noun meaning a place with a swing set and slide.

Patience (pa*shens) n. — The most important ingredient for dating, marriage, and children. See also “tranquilizers”.

Valentine’s Day (val*en*tinez dae) n. — A day when you have dreams of a candlelight dinner, diamonds, and romance, but consider yourself lucky to get a card.

Waterproof Mascara (wah*tr*pruf mas*kar*ah) n. — Comes off if you cry, shower, or swim, but will not come off if you try to remove it.


First you forget names, then you forget faces, then you forget to pull your zipper up, then you forget to pull your zipper down.

Leo Rosenburg


A 4-year-old boy who was asked to return thanks before Christmas dinner. The family members bowed their heads in expectation. He began his prayer, thanking God for all his friends, naming them one by one. Then he thanked God for Mommy, Daddy, brother, sister, Grandma, Grandpa, and all his aunts and uncles. Then he began to thank God for the food.

He gave thanks for the turkey, the dressing, the fruit salad, the cranberry sauce, the pies, the cakes, even the Cool Whip. Then he paused, and everyone waited–and waited. After a long silence, the young fellow looked up at his mother and asked, “If I thank God for the broccoli, won’t he know that I’m lying?”


How many roads must a man travel down before he admits he is lost?


A big city California lawyer went duck hunting in rural Texas. He shot and dropped a bird, but it fell into a farmer’s field on the other side of a fence.

As the lawyer climbed over the fence, an elderly farmer drove up on his tractor and asked him what he was doing. The litigator responded, “I shot a duck and it fell in this field, and now I’m going into retrieve it.”

The old farmer replied. “This is my property, and you are not coming over here.”

The indignant lawyer said, “I am one of the best trial attorneys in the U.S. and, if you don’t let me get that duck, I’ll sue you and take everything you own.”

The old farmer smiled and said, “Apparently, you don’t know how we do things in Texas. We settle small disagreements like this with the Texas Three Kick Rule.”

The lawyer asked, “What is the Texas Three Kick Rule?”

The Farmer replied. “Well, first I kick you three times and then you kick me three times, and so on, back and forth, until someone gives up.”

The attorney quickly thought about the proposed contest and decided that he could easily take the old codger. He agreed to abide by the local custom.

The old farmer slowly climbed down from the tractor and walked up to the city feller. His first kick planted the toe of his heavy work boot into the lawyer’s groin and dropped him to his knees. His second kick nearly ripped the man’s nose off his face. The barrister was flat on his belly when the farmer’s third kick to a kidney nearly caused him to give up.

The lawyer summoned every bit of his will and managed to get to his feet and said, “Okay, you old coot now it’s my turn.”

The old farmer smiled and said, “Naw, I give up. You can have the duck.”


Don’t be sexist — broads hate that.


A family was visiting an Indian reservation when they happen upon an old tribesman laying face down in the middle of the road with his ear pressed firmly against the blacktop. The father of the family asked the old tribesman what he was doing. The tribesman began to speak… “woman, late thirties, three kids, one barking dog in late model, Four door station wagon, traveling at 65 m.p.h.”

“That’s amazing” exclaimed the father.

“You can tell all of that by just listening to the ground”?

“No”, said the old tribesman. “They just ran over me five minutes ago!”


“You cannot do a kindness too soon because you never know how soon it will be too late.”

Ralph Waldo Emerson


Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

This daily is sent only to special people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.


Are you better than you think you are?

No one can make you feel inferior without your consent”

Eleanor Roosevelt


I have often said that I meet many people who don’t realize how good they are. I think that often this is because they do not think well enough of themselves. They concentrate on their missteps while taking for granted the good things they do every day. A high level of self-criticism is sure to prevent a person from having a positive future. I suggest to some of the folks I work with that they log what they do every day and then they will see the value of their efforts. Here is an edited article that can help those who don’t see their real self.

 How to Smack Down Your Inner Critic Once and For All

by Ash Roy

Do you have an inner critic that taunts you every time you trip up? You know, that taunting voice that erupts the second you make a mistake? You don’t know when it started, but for as long as you can remember it’s been with you, waiting for the slightest opportunity to launch its next attack. And while you suspect its intentions are positive — to protect you from failures — in practice all it does is make things worse.

Favorite taunts of the ruthless inner critic

I’ve been absent-minded for as long as I can remember. I have difficulty focusing on one thing for long, which often leads to silly mistakes. Like losing things. And this is where that inner critic jumps in. “How could you be so careless?” “Will you ever learn?” “How could you be so irresponsible?”

This incessant voice was truly bringing me down. It was eroding my self-esteem. Every time I forgot something, it would nag me to the point of paralysis, unable to remedy the situation. Things came to a head and I decided that I had to find a solution. I had to silence this inner critic once and for all.

At first I tried addressing the tendency to be absent-minded by creating lists using the Getting Things Done approach. This helped me get more organized but didn’t silence the harsh critic when I did forget things albeit less frequently.

After a bit of research, I discovered that cultivating a mindfulness practice was very powerful. I think of it as meditation in action. This turned out to be the answer I was looking for.

Mindfulness — an antidote to the chattering monkey mind?

Mindfulness is a psychological concept. It can be defined as being consistently attentive and aware of one’s mental patterns in a non-judgmental manner. By using the breath as an anchor the practitioner is able to step back and ‘watch’ her thoughts without identifying with them. Every time she becomes aware that her mind has run away with her thoughts, she consistently and gently brings her focus back to her breath and resumes watching the thoughts without identifying with them. One of the benefits of a mindfulness practice is the capacity it creates in the mind of the practitioner to objectively observe, and then change deeply ingrained mental patterns.

My first big test of my mindfulness practice

A few months after starting my mindfulness practice, I found myself on a familiar mental roller coaster. My mind had been particularly unruly that morning. The usual tirade of thoughts filled with self-blame and shame ensued. The panic-driven questions seemed so reminiscent of my (well intentioned) caregivers from during my growing years. As the barrage continued my morale dropped.

At this point something interesting happened. My mindfulness practice came to the rescue Instead of slumping into my usual state of paralysis.

My attention came back to my breath. The destructive thinking continued to play itself out as I watched.

I chose not to react. Instead I objectively watched my thoughts play out the painful cycle of self-blame.

This act of objectively watching showed me that I had a choice not to react. Not to believe the thoughts like I had in the past. Instead I could choose to just let them pass across my mind like clouds moving across the sky. I made the obvious choice. I didn’t buy into the destructive thoughts.

The following are some specific ways in which mindfulness will vanquish your inner critic – once and for all.

  1. A strong mindfulness practice can bring destructive thought patterns out into the open. Cultivating the capacity to ‘watch’ these destructive thought patterns means you can choose not to be victimized by them. Instead, you can take constructive action.
  2. If you watch your mind consistently, using your breath as an anchor, you will start to see your mind’s workings with greater clarity over time. You won’t be a victim of destructive thinking and will make better choices that lead to constructive action.

       3.  You don’t need to either push the thoughts away or indulge them. You just watch them as they work through their ‘life cycle’.  The act of watching is extremely powerful.

Do you have an inner critic? Does it berate you and undermine you, often without you realizing it? If you do, then just stop. And listen to your thoughts.


“The moment you doubt whether you can fly, you cease for ever to be able to do it.”

J.M. Barrie


A meat counter clerk, who had had a particularly good day, proudly flipped his last chicken on a scale and weighed it.

“That will be $6.35,” he told the customer.

“That really is a little too small,” said the woman. “Don’t you have anything larger?”

Hesitating but thinking fast, the clerk returned the chicken to the refrigerator, paused a moment, then took it out again. “This one,” he said faintly, “will be $6.65.”

The woman paused for a moment, then made her decision.

“I know what,” she said, “I’ll take both of them!”


“Some people believe that holding on and hanging in there are signs of great strength. However, there are times when it takes much more strength to know when to let go –  and then do it.”

Ann Landers


Flying home after visiting her daughter in England, she arranged to have her husband meet her plane at the Vancouver, B.C. airport.  This meant a stop at the border crossing between the United States and Canada, where her husband was asked: “What is your reason for entering the country?” and “How long are you planning to stay?”

He replied that he was picking his wife up at the airport after her trip to England.

Without missing a beat, the guard asked two more questions in the same businesslike tone: “Is the house clean?”  And, “Are there fresh flowers on the table?”


Don’t worry about avoiding temptation.  As you grow older, it will avoid you.


A bishop discovered a tribe of Indians in the Yukon who had never recorded a baptism, confirmation or marriage.  The bishop soon rectified the situation by baptizing everyone. He also married every beaming couple that walked by. Later, the tribal chief told the Bishop the tribe had never had so much fun. The bishop asked the chief which part they enjoyed the most.

“The marriage service,” the chief said, smiling, “We all got new wives!”


“The word ‘aerobics’ came about when the gym instructors got together and said: If we’re going to charge $10 an hour, we can’t call it Jumping up and down.”

Rita Rudner


Molly was worried that her three-year-old son was unusually precocious, and took him to a psychiatrist. “Right,” said the shrink, “We’ll just try a few simple tests.” To Morris the boy, he said “Say a few words – anything that comes into your mind.” The boy turned to his mother and asked, “Does he want logically constructed sentences or just a few random and purely isolated words without any split infinitives?”


“As soon as you trust yourself, you will know how to live.”

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe


Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

This daily is sent only to special people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.


Do you see what I see?

It’s not what you look at that matters, it’s what you see.

Henry David Thoreau

 Look around you

There was a time when I felt that adventure and new experiences only existed across the horizon. You see I was taken my surroundings for granted and never opened my eyes to what was all around me. Happily a byproduct of retiring has been the discovery of some great things to do and to see right here at home. When I was involved with a lot nationally and globally my focus was often on the world outside of where I lived.

Once there was little demand for me to stay involved with my past activities I discovered that there was a welcoming community right here in Indiana that provided me with lots of opportunities to enjoy my days while often helping others. I almost became a tourist in my home town as I became an avid fan of our theatrical community, our rich cultural intuitions, the varied learning opportunities and most of all the friendly people of Central Indiana.

An article from my friends at Positively Present that reminded me of what we have always just waiting to be discovered. Here is an edited version of the article:


Of course, it’s much easier to discover new things when you’re in a new place. New things capture our attention so well. But creating a well traveled road on a path you venture down every day is much more difficult. Whether your travels lead you across the globe or just across town,  here are some tips for how to make the journey worthwhile.


You’ve certainly heard the phrase “stop and smell the roses” before, but have you really done it. In order to smell the roses, you first have to notice them. As we travel through out daily routines, we don’t often pay attention to what’s all around us. We believe we’ve seen it all before and don’t make much of an effort to look around. But things are always, always changing and there are so many little things that can spark inspiration along the road (no matter how frequently you travel it!). The littlest things can spark fascinating thoughts.


No matter where you travel, there is beauty. It can be found everywhere, even in the most unexpected places. The trick to finding it? Look. Usually we’re so busy trying to get from here to there that we don’t pay attention to little bits of beauty all around us. When driving to work, pay attention to the trees and the way their leaves change. Beauty can be found in more than just things. The more you notice beautiful things as you travel through your day, the brighter your day will become.


The five senses are some of the best tools for staying present, and they can be particularly useful for creating a road well traveled. Next time you travel, choose a sense (sight, sound, taste, touch, or smell) and pay close attention to it as you’re on the road. (If you’re driving, sight or sound probably works best.) Listen to the birds, the car horns, the wind, the sound of your own breath. Drawing your attention to one specific sense is an amazing way not only to keep yourself focused on the present, but it’s also a great way to discover new things or things that have always been there but that you’ve never stopped to notice before.


If you can take a different road to get from where you are to where you want be, that can be a great way to make your travels more interesting. Even if it’s longer, a detour can lead you to new inspiration. If there’s only one road to take, you switch up the way you travel. Take the bus instead of driving. If it’s not far, walk instead of driving. Doing something different is not only good for new discoveries, but it’s also a great way to reflect on the way you always travel and take note of what you do and don’t prefer.


One way to get the most out of life is to look upon it as an adventure.

William Feather


Great Truths About Growing Old

1)  Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional.

2)  Insanity is my only means of relaxation.

3)  Forget the health food. I need all the preservatives I can get.

4)  You know you are getting old when you stoop to tie your shoes and wonder what else you can do while you are down there.

5)  You are getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you once got from a roller coaster.

6)  Perhaps you know why women over fifty do not have babies: They would put them down somewhere and forget where they left them.

7)  One of  life’s mysteries is how a two pound box of candy can make a person gain five pounds.

8)  Every time I think about exercise, I lie down until the thought goes away.

9)  God put me on earth to accomplish a certain number of things.  Right now I am so far behind, I will live forever.

10) It is frustrating when you know all the answers, but nobody bothers to ask you the questions.

11) I finally got my head together, and my body fell apart.

12) There cannot be a crisis this week; my schedule is already full.

13) Time may be a great healer, but it is also a lousy beautician.

14) The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight, because by then your body and your fat are really good friends.

15) Age does not always bring wisdom.  Sometimes age comes alone.

16) Just when I was getting used to yesterday, along came today.

17) Sometimes I think I understand everything, then I regain consciousness.

18) Amazing! You just hang something in your closet for a while, and it shrinks two sizes.

19) It is bad to suppress laughter; it goes back down and spreads to your hips.

20) Freedom of the press means no-iron clothes.

21) Inside some of us is a thin person struggling to get out, but they can usually be sedated with a few pieces of chocolate cake.


“My boyfriend and I broke up. He wanted to get married and I didn’t want him to.”

Rita Rudner


Two nuns where driving down the road in Transylvania and a Werewolf jumped on the hood. the old nun said; “I’ee look at that ugly thing, shake the car and knock him off.”

The young nun turned the wheel from side to side but he didn’t fall off. “Slam on the brakes, surely that ‘ill knock him off,” said the old nun.

She slammed on the brakes, but he still didn’t fall off.

“We’ll fix ’em,” said the old nun, show him your cross.”

The young nun rolled down the window, stuck her head out and yelled; “Get off me friggin’ ‘ood ya’ ugly bastard.”


George Washington’s brother was the uncle of our country.


Some tourists in the Chicago Museum of Natural History are marveling at the dinosaur bones. One of them asks the guard,

“Can you tell me how old the dinosaur bones are?”

The guard replies, “They are 3 million, four years, and six months old.”

“That’s an awfully exact number,” says the tourist. “How do you know their age so precisely?”

The guard answers, “Well, the dinosaur bones were three million years old when I started working here, and that was four and a half years ago.”


If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.

Wayne Dyer


Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

This daily is sent only to special people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.


Everyone can make a difference

Each difficult moment has the potential to open my eyes and open my heart.

Myla Kabat-Zinn

 helping hand

Over the years I have met many people from varying backgrounds who have been folks that I was glad I knew. When I was a kid there were boys I knew who were really difficult, some even went to jail later in life. Part of my early years was spent in a year around boarding school for kids from broken homes, we were allowed to go home one week a year. We ran a farm, raised most of own food and lived in dormitories in cottages where we had to get along.

Many of my fellow students had a lot of aggression to overcome, some never did. The good news was that some of the boys had their first experience with caring adults and that changed their behavior.

To this day I have a special place in my heart for young people who make good in spite of all they have had to overcome. I have found that those that do make it care for others while so many who have had it easy think mainly about themselves.

I know that it was the special people who have taken an interest in me over my lifetime that has made my great life possible. I truly have benefited from their gift of friendship and kindness.

I have always liked the message in the following story for it reminds me of those whose hearts made such a difference so many years ago.

 A Special Teacher

Years ago a John Hopkin’s professor gave a group of graduate students this assignment: Go to the slums. Take 200 boys, between the ages of 12 and 16, and investigate their background and environment. Then predict their chances for the future. The students, after consulting social statistics, talking to the boys, and compiling much data, concluded that 90 percent of the boys would spend some time in jail.

Twenty-five years later another group of graduate students was given the job of testing the prediction. They went back to the same area. Some of the boys – by then men – were still there, a few had died, some had moved away, but they got in touch with 180 of the original 200. They found that only four of the group had ever been sent to jail.

Why was it that these men, who had lived in a breeding place of crime, had such a surprisingly good record? The researchers were continually told: “Well, there was a teacher…” They pressed further, and found that in 75 percent of the cases it was the same woman.

The researchers went to this teacher, now living in a home for retired teachers. How had she exerted this remarkable influence over that group of children? Could she give them any reason why these boys should have remembered her? “No,” she said, “no I really couldn’t.” And then, thinking back over the years, she said amusingly, more to herself than to her questioners: “I loved those boys…”


My values, our values, aren’t about pointing fingers. They are about offering a helping hand.

Kathleen Blanco


Top Ten Reasons Why It’s Great To Be A Dog

  1. If it itches, you can reach it, no matter where it itches.
  2. No one notices if you have hair growing in weird places as you get older.
  3. Personal hygiene is a blast: No one expects you to take a bath every day, and you don’t even have to comb your own hair.
  4. Having a wet nose is considered a sign of good health.
  5. No one thinks less of you for burping. Some people might actually think you’re cute.
  6. Who needs a big home entertainment system? A bone or an old shoe can entertain you for hours.
  7. You can spend hours just smelling stuff.
  8. No one ever expects you to pay for lunch or dinner. You never have to worry about table manners, and if you gain weight, it’s someone else’s fault.
  9. It doesn’t take much to make you happy. You’re always excited to see the same old people. All they have to do is leave the room for five minutes and come back.
  10. Every garbage can looks like a cold buffet to you.


Married life is very frustrating.  In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens.  In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens.  In the third year, they both speak and the neighbors listen.


The psychiatrist was not expecting the distraught stranger who staggered into his office and slumped into a chair. “You’ve got to help me. I’m losing my memory, Doctor,” he sobbed. “I once had a successful business, a wife, home and family; I was a respected member of the community.  But all that’s gone now. Since my memory began failing, I’ve lost the business – I couldn’t remember my clients’ names. My wife and children have left me, too; and why shouldn’t they – some nights I wouldn’t get home until four or five in the morning. I’d forget where I lived…And it’s getting worse. Doctor – it’s getting worse!”

“This is not an unusual form of neurosis,” the psychiatrist said soothingly. “Now tell me, just how long ago did you first become aware of this condition?”

“Condition?” The man sat up in his chair. “What condition?”


Doing a job RIGHT the first time gets the job done. Doing the job WRONG fourteen times gives you job security.


While traveling in Quebec, my father complained that all the street signs were in French. His comments and sarcasm went on and on.

Then after passing a billboard for a restaurant that featured filet mignon, he belted out, “Finally! Something in English!”


“Conway’s Law” In any organization there is one person who knows what is going on. That person must be fired.


When I go to casinos, the most ridiculous sign I see is the one that says………”If you have a gambling problem, call 1-800-GAMBLER.”

So, I call them and say, “I have an ace and a six. The dealer has a seven. What do I do?”


A person’s most useful asset is not the head full of knowledge, but a heart full of love, an ear ready to listen, and a hand willing to help.

Author Unknown


Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

This daily is sent only to special people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.


Life in the slow lane

For fast-acting relief, try slowing down.

Lily Tomlin


This year has been both interesting and somewhat life changing for me due to my recovery restrictions after a few major health events. My inability to commit to too much and the limitations put on my activities resulted in my backing off of a number things that I have been doing these last few years. I did not feel I should continue as a board member or in a leading role when I could not do what needed to be done so I withdrew from the positions.

Bottom line is that over the last few months much of my time has been mine to use as I pleased and I again learned the value not letting your obligations dominate your life to the point you miss what is going on around you. If you find yourself going too fast to enjoy your life you might benefit by Leo Babauta’s rules for enjoying life more. I have listed below some of his thoughts

 Essential Rules for Slowing Down and Enjoying Life More

It’s an irony of our modern lives that while technology is continually invented that saves us time, we use that time to do more and more things, and so our lives are more fast-paced and hectic than ever. Life moves at such a fast pace that it seems to pass us by before we can really enjoy it. However, it doesn’t have to be this way.

A slower-paced life means making time to enjoy your mornings, instead of rushing off to work in a frenzy. It means taking time to enjoy whatever you’re doing, to appreciate the outdoors, to actually focus on whoever you’re talking to or spending time with. Slowing down is a conscious choice, and not always an easy one, but it leads to a greater appreciation for life and a greater level of happiness. Here’s how to do it.


Do less. It’s hard to slow down when you are trying to do a million things. Instead, make the conscious choice to do less. Focus on what’s really important, what really needs to be done, and let go of the rest. Put space between tasks and appointments, so you can move through your days at a more leisurely pace.

Be present. It’s not enough to just slow down — you need to actually be mindful of whatever you’re doing at the moment. That means, when you find yourself thinking about something you need to do, or something that’s already happened, or something that might happen … gently bring yourself back to the present moment. This takes practice but is essential.

Disconnect. Don’t always be connected. If you carry around an iPhone or Blackberry or other mobile device, shut it off. Better yet, learn to leave it behind when possible. Being connected all the time means we’re subject to interruptions, we’re constantly stressed about information coming in, we are at the mercy of the demands of others.

Focus on people. Too often we spend time with friends and family, or meet with colleagues, and we’re not really there with them. We talk to them but are distracted by devices. We are there, but our minds are on things we need to do. We listen, but we’re really thinking about ourselves and what we want to say. With conscious effort you can shut off the outside world and just be present with the person you’re with. It means we really connect with people rather than just meeting with them.

Find pleasure in anything. This is related to being present, but taking it a step farther. Whatever you’re doing, be fully present … and also appreciate every aspect of it, and find the enjoyable aspects.

Single-task. The opposite of multi-tasking. Focus on one thing at a time. When you feel the urge to switch to other tasks, pause, breathe, and pull yourself back.

You can read the full article at http://zenhabits.net/the-10-essential-rules-for-slowing-down-and-enjoying-life-more/


You’re only here for a short visit. Don’t hurry, don’t worry. And be sure to smell the flowers along the way.

Walter Hagen



One hand on wheel, one hand on horn: New York

One hand on wheel, one finger out window: Chicago

One hand on wheel, one hand on newspaper, foot solidly on accelerator: Boston

One hand on wheel, one hand cradling cell phone, brick on accelerator: California; with gun in lap: L.A.

Both hands on wheel, eyes shut, both feet on brake, quivering in terror: Ohio, but driving in California.

One hand on latte, one knee on wheel, one hand cradling cell phone, foot on brake, mind on game: Seattle

Two hands gripping wheel, blue hair barely visible above window level, driving 35 on the interstate in the left lane with the left blinker on: Florida.


If I were here more often, I wouldn’t be gone so much.


A wife, one evening, drew her husband’s attention to the couple next door and said, “Do you see that couple?  How devoted they are?  He kisses her every time they meet. Why don’t you do that?”

“I would love to,” replied the husband, “but I don’t know her well enough.”


Sign at a railroad station: “Beware! To touch these wires is instant death. Anyone found doing so will be prosecuted.”



This virus works on the honor system:

Please forward this message to everyone in your address book.

Now delete all the files from your hard disk.

Thank you for your cooperation.


If you have nothing to do, don’t do it here.


Did you know that:

In every episode of Seinfeld there is a Superman somewhere.

Average life span of a major league baseball: 7 pitches.

A duck’s quack doesn’t echo, and no one knows why.

The only 15 letter word that can be spelled without repeating a letter is uncopyrightable.

I know, who cares?


If you think nobody cares about you, try missing a couple of payments.



Yes = No

No = Yes

Maybe = No

I’m sorry. = You’ll be sorry.

We need = I want

It’s your decision = The correct decision should be obvious by now.

Do what you want = You’ll pay for this later.

We need to talk = I need to complain

Sure…go ahead = I don’t want you to.

I’m not upset = Of course I’m upset, you moron!

This kitchen is so inconvenient = I want a new house.

I want new curtains = and carpeting, and furniture, and wallpaper…..

Hang the picture there = NO, I mean hang it there!

I heard a noise = I noticed you were almost asleep.

Do you love me? = I’m going to ask for something expensive.

How much do you love me? = I did something today you’re really not going to like.

I’ll be ready in a minute = Kick off your shoes and find a good game on TV.

You have to learn to communicate. = Just agree with me.

Are you listening to me!? = Too late, you’re dead.

I’m not yelling! = Yes I am yelling because I think this is important.


“Dance. Smile. Giggle. Marvel. TRUST. HOPE. LOVE. WISH. BELIEVE. Most of all, enjoy every moment of the journey, and appreciate where you are at this moment instead of always focusing on how far you have to go.”

Mandy Hale


Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

This daily is sent only to special people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.


Live on the bright side

A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.

Winston Churchill


Someone said to me once when I had commented on the beauty of a garden that the reason that I thought it was beautiful was because I could not see the weeds. It was then that I realized that while I was looking for those things around us that are beautiful she was searching for the flaws.

I often am frustrated by those who spend their time focused on “why not” instead of on “let’s do it.” Unfortunately too often the naysayers become right; nothing gets done because nothing gets started. Recently I reread an article by Marc Chernoff that advocates an optimistic outlook, here in part is what he wrote:


People who carry an optimistic outlook are typically healthier and more productive than their pessimistic peers.  They catch fewer colds, cope better with life’s daily struggles, and may even live longer due to reduced levels of stress.

They make optimal use of all available options.

Most people get irritated by those who seem “too optimistic,” but this is usually an unfortunate misinterpretation of the difference between and optimist and an idealist. An optimist is neither naive, nor in denial, nor blind to the realities of life.  An optimist believes in the optimal usage of all the available options, no matter how narrow the supply.  As a result, optimistic people are able to better see the bigger picture.  They can more accurately visualize and manage the present possibilities.  In other words, an optimist is simply a positive realist.

They respect themselves for who they are.

Optimists defend themselves against self-dislike in two primary ways.  First, they get back to trusting their own intuition when it comes to their daily activities.  They stop asking for everyone else’s approval and simply do what they know in their heart feels right.  Second, optimists don’t judge themselves against a set of unrealistic, third party ideals.  They let go of the ideals and instead hold on to the belief that they are always good enough just the way they are, even as they grow into a stronger, wiser version of themselves.

They disconnect happiness from achievement.

In order to be optimistic, you have to be generally content with your life.  In order to find this contentment, you have to look within yourself.  Happiness, after all, is an inside job. If you look for happiness outside yourself, by tying it to a specific achievement you much reach, you have two big problems:

You may never succeed. – If you feel like something is wrong with you and needs to be fixed, but you continuously fall short of fixing it, you will start yourself on a downward spiral where every time you fail to fix it you feel even worse.  Eventually you will be unable to succeed simply because you no longer believe in your ability to do so.

You may succeed and decide you want even more. – If you feel like something is wrong with you and needs to be fixed, and you succeed at fixing it, you will likely find something new about yourself that needs fixing too.  It’s a never-ending cycle for your entire life.

Optimists disconnect achievement from happiness and give themselves permission to be happy, in each moment, without the need for anything more.  This isn’t to say that they are complacent.  They still set goals, work hard, help others, and grow, but they learn to indulge joyously in the journey, not the destination.

They avoid negative people and create positivity.

You are only as good as the company you keep, and misery loves company.  If you spend too much time around negative people, there’s a strong chance you won’t find much to be happy about.  Do yourself a favor and dodge other people’s negativity.  Surround yourself with positive, emotionally supportive friends and spend time together doing things that make you smile.

They expect life to be a series of ups and downs.

Just because you’re an optimist doesn’t mean you’re not going to have bad days.  You will – that’s reality.  Life isn’t always rainbows and butterflies.  A foundation of realism keeps things in perspective and helps prevent things from being blown out of proportion.

They use positive language and gestures.

It’s not always what happens that determines your mood, but how you verbalize and express what happens that counts.

For instance, when an optimist experiences a bout of success she might say, “That’s just as I had anticipated; I studied hard and my diligence paid off,” while a pessimist might say, “Goodness, was I lucky to get a good grade on that test,” not giving herself any credit and literally snatching her own defeat from the hands of victory.


“Dwell on the beauty of life. Watch the stars, and see yourself running with them.”

Marcus Aurelius


Two political candidates were having a hot debate. Finally, one of them jumped up and yelled at the other, “What about the powerful interest that controls you?”

And the other guy screamed back, “You leave my wife out of this!”


“Weiler’s Law” Nothing is impossible for the man who doesn’t have to do it himself.


Leola, who lived in Tennesse, had a serious telephone problem. But unlike most people, she did something about it. . .The brand-new $10 million Ribrock Plaza Motel opened near her house and had acquired almost the same telephone number as Leola’s. From the moment the motel opened, Leola was besieged by calls not for her. Since she had the same phone number for years, she felt that she had a case to persuade the motel management to change its number.

Naturally, the management refused claiming that it could not change its stationery. The phone company was not helpful, either. A number was a number, and just because a customer was getting someone else’s calls 24 hours a day didn’t make it responsible. After her pleas fell on deaf ears, Leola decided to take matters into her own hands.

At 9 o’clock the phone rang. Someone from Memphis was calling the motel and asked for a room for the following Tuesday. Leola said, “No problem. How many nights?”

A few hours later Dallas checked in. A secretary wanted a suite with two bedrooms for a week. Emboldened, Leola said the Presidential Suite on the 10th floor was available for $600 a night. The secretary said that she would take it and asked if the hotel wanted a deposit. “No, that won’t be necessary,” Leola said. “We trust you.”

The next day was a busy one for Leola. In the morning, she booked an electric appliance manufacturers convention for Memorial Day weekend, a college prom and a reunion of the 82nd Airborne veterans from World War II.

Within a few months, the Ribrock Plaza Motel was a disaster area. People kept showing up for weddings, bar mitzvahs, and Sweet Sixteen parties and were all told there were no such events.

Leola had her final revenge when she read in the local paper that the motel might go bankrupt. Her phone rang, and an executive from Marriott said, “We’re prepared to offer you $200,000 for your motel.”

Leola replies. . . .”We’ll take it…… but only if you change your phone number.”


Today is the Tomorrow you worried about Yesterday. Was it worth it?


The Smith’s were proud of their family tradition. Their ancestors had come to America on the Mayflower. They had included Senators and Wall Street wizards. They decided to compile a family history, a legacy for their children and grandchildren. They hired a fine author. Only one problem arose – how to handle that great-uncle George, who was executed in the electric chair.

The author said he could handle the story tactfully.

The book appeared and in it was found the following passage: “Great-uncle George occupied a chair of applied electronics at an important government institution, was attached to his position by the strongest of ties, and his death came as a great shock.”


“You’ll never find a rainbow if you’re looking down”

Charles Chaplin


Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

This daily is sent only to special people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.

Have you decided how old you will be today?

I’m not interested in age. People who tell me their age are silly. You’re as old as you feel.

Elizabeth Arden

 Stay young

If you want to save time don’t go looking for the Fountain of Youth. Trust me it does not exist. But that does not mean we have to sit back and let the years catch up with us. In fact we can slow the aging process way down and the earlier in life we start the more we gain in happy productive years.

I was a slow starter in the effort; I waited until I had some health problems a number of years ago. But even though I was up in years I benefitted from starting to treat myself better. I know many people are surprised that I am as active as I am; some even think I continue to contribute. You want to know a secret, no one is more surprised than I am. Thank goodness I was led to a better life style, The good news is that you can too, here are some tips from Blogger Brigette Muller on getting started.


6 Gifts to Give to Your Body

With so much coming at us from all angles every day, it may slip our minds that the most effective of healers are with us at all times: our very own bodies. I was recently talking to my friend about just that, and she said something that really stuck with me. The sole purpose of the body is to keep itself alive. If we each give our body even the slightest bit of what it needs, it will gladly accept that positive gift – in fact, it will take that gift and run with it.

I’m not writing this to introduce a crazy new cure-all idea that will surprise and amaze you; I’m writing this to serve as a little reminder. For you, for me, and for everyone around us. Let’s be kind to our bodies. Let’s give them what they need. After all, without them, our essence would have no physical form.

Sleep is one of the easiest gifts to give to our bodies – even if we fight it, it’ll eventually happen on its own. But for some reason, we fight and fight and fight, trying to convince ourselves that whatever else is going on in our crazy lives is more important than sleep. But that couldn’t be further from the truth. Sleep is the body’s prime time to heal itself and get back on track for whatever it will endure the following day. And if you’re well-rested, you’ll find that it’s much easier to be productive – you’ll feel much more rewarded come the end of the day. Try your hardest to make ample time for sleep. When you wake up feeling well-rested and ready for what’s to come – quite possibly for the first time in years – you may find that sleep will make its way back to the top of your priority list.

A good stretch is something our bodies crave – fulfill the urge! Stretching feels incredibly good, and has tons of benefits for you to enjoy. A little bit of stretching every morning can help reduce stress, increase circulation, make you more flexible, and prevent injury, just to name a few. A daily yoga session (or two) is ideal, but if that isn’t for you, just do what you can.

Stretching brings me to my next point: physical activity – our bodies are wired for it! These days we’re so surrounded by stimuli – our minds seem to buzz nonstop and it becomes so easy to feel worn out, even after doing no physical activity whatsoever. Make it a priority to be physical in some way every day – even if that just means a brisk 20-minute walk. Just do it. It’s easy to make excuses – I do it, too – but, when you really think about it… what’s the point? I’ve been in shape, and I’ve been out of shape. Guess which one feels a trillion times better. Guess which one offers more benefits than you’d even imagine. You got it, babe.

Nutrients – the good kind. Hunger is an urge we all make a point to fulfill – whether we do so in the best ways, though, is a different story. Make a resolution to take in more of the good and less of the bad. Eat whole foods that come straight from the earth. The more processed it is, the more you may want to stay away. Expand your  diet by trying new things; make healthy substitutions; experiment with your own creations. By giving your body the purest form of fuel, you’re giving it less dirty work to do, meaning it can spend all of that fresh energy on keeping you at your maximum health and taking you to the next level in every future endeavor.

Water makes up over two thirds of a person’s body weight. It’s essential for our survival, yet so many of us are moving through our lives in a constant state of dehydration. Let’s change that. Sip clean, sip often. It’s simple, it’s refreshing, and its benefits are plentiful. Having access to clean drinking water is a blessing in itself – let us never take that for granted.


You can’t help getting older, but you don’t have to get old.

George Burns


Radar: “Flight 1234, for noise abatement turn right 45 degrees.”

Pilot: “Roger, but we are at 35,000 feet, how much noise can we make up here?”

Radar: “Sir, have you ever heard the noise a 727 makes when it hits a 747?”


“I know that there are people who do not love their fellow man, and I hate people like that!”

Tom Lehrer


The wise old Mother Superior was dying. The nuns gathered around her bed trying to make her comfortable. They gave her some warm milk to drink, but she refused it. Then one nun took the glass back to the kitchen. Remembering a bottle of Irish whiskey received as a gift the previous Christmas, she opened and poured a generous amount into the warm milk. Back at Mother Superior’s bed, she held the glass to her lips. Mother drank a little, then a little more. Before they knew it, she had drunk the whole glass down to the last drop.

“Mother,” the nuns asked with earnest, “Please give us some wisdom before you die.”

She raised herself up in bed with a pious look on her face and said, “Don’t sell that cow.”


It’s frustrating when you know all the answers, but nobody bothers to ask you the questions.


A young preacher was contacted by the local funeral director to hold a grave-side committal service at a small local cemetery for someone with no family or friends. The preacher started early but quickly got himself lost, making several wrong turns. He arrived a half-hour late, the hearse was nowhere in sight, and the workmen were eating lunch. The pastor went to the open grave and found the vault lid already in place.  Taking out his book, he read the service.

As he was returning to his car, he overheard one of the workmen say: “Think we should tell him it’s a septic tank?”


“A child of five would understand this. Send somebody to fetch a child of five.”

Groucho Marx


On a trip to the zoo, I made a casual stroll by the cage of a laughing hyena.  A young man was leaning over the bar at the edge of the cage, whispering something in the animal’s direction.  As I stepped closer, I heard him say, “Did you hear the one about…”


There is a fountain of youth: it is your mind, your talents, the creativity you bring to your life and the lives of people you love. When you learn to tap this source, you will truly have defeated age.

Sophia Loren


Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

This daily is sent only to special people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are more than 2000 readers from around the world.


Live with no regrets!

“I can’t change yesterday, but I do have the power to make today a wonderful day.”



I hope you had as good a day as I did yesterday, mine started with breakfast with an old friend who has a daily radio show and then I met one of my favorite professional actresses for brunch. It is always pleasure to spend some time with them and hear about the things that are going on in their lives. It is good to just get out and about rather than stagnating in an easy chair.

One of the events yesterday was the discovery of an anonymously written article that reminded me of the decision I made years ago when I first retired even though I knew all the reasons why I couldn’t. Over the years I sometimes was tempted to brood about what was going on but always just kept going. Here is the article I found.

 A Change Of Plans

I had not really planned on taking a trip this time of year, and yet I found myself packing rather hurriedly. This trip was going to be unpleasant and I knew in advance that no real good would come of it. I’m talking about my annual “Guilt Trip.”

I got tickets to fly there on “WISHIHAD” airlines. It was an extremely short flight. I got my baggage, which I could not check. I chose to carry it myself all the way. It was weighted down with a thousand memories of what might have been.

No one greeted me as I entered the terminal to the Regret City International Airport.  I say international because people from all over the world come to this dismal town. As I checked into the Last Resort Hotel, I noticed that they would be hosting the year’s most important event, the Annual Pity Party.

I wasn’t going to miss that great social occasion. Many of the towns leading citizens would be there. First, there would be the Done family, you know, Should Have, Would Have and Could Have. Then came the I Had family. You probably know ol’ Wish and his clan. Of course, the Opportunities would be present, Missed and Lost.

The biggest family would be the Yesterday’s. There are far too many of them to count, but each one would have a very sad story to share. Then Shattered Dreams would surely make and appearance. And It’s Their Fault would regale us with stories (excuses) about how things had failed in his life, and each story would be loudly applauded by Don’t Blame Me and I Couldn’t Help It.

Well, to make a long story short, I went to this depressing party knowing that there would be no real benefit in doing so. And, as usual, I became very depressed. But as I thought about all of the stories of failures brought back from the past, it occurred to me that all of this trip and subsequent “pity party” could be cancelled by ME! I started to truly realize that I did not have to be there. I didn’t have to be depressed.

One thing kept going through my mind, I can’t change yesterday, but I do have the power to make today a wonderful day. I can be happy, joyous, fulfilled, encouraged, as well as encouraging. Knowing this, I left the City of Regret immediately and left no forwarding address.

Am I sorry for mistakes I’ve made in the past? YES! But there is no physical way to undo them. So, if you’re planning a trip back to the City of Regret, please cancel all your reservations now. Instead, take a trip to a place called, Starting Again.

I liked it so much that I have now taken up permanent residence there. My neighbors, the I Forgive Myselfs and the New Starts are so very helpful. By the way, you don’t have to carry around heavy baggage, because the load is lifted from your shoulders upon arrival.

God bless you in finding this great town. If you can find it — it’s in your own heart — please look me up. I live on ICANDOIT street.


Write your Sad times in Sand, Write your Good times in Stone.

George Bernard Shaw


When my cousin, Tom, was at the police academy, prior to joining Chicago’s finest, one of his instructors asked him during an oral exam, “What would you do if you had to arrest your own mother?”

He immediately replied, with conviction,  “Call for backup.”


When you have accumulated sufficient knowledge to get by, you’re too old to remember it.


We were on our way to the hospital where our 16-year-old daughter was scheduled to undergo a tonsillectomy.  During the ride we talked about how the procedure would be performed. “Dad,” our teenager asked, “how are they going to keep my mouth open during the surgery?” Without hesitation he quipped, “They’re going to give you a phone to hold.”


Recently we called a business phone number and heard the following:  If you are calling from a touch-tone phone, press one now.  If you are calling from a rotary phone, hang up and call back from a touch-tone phone.


Three monkeys sat in a coconut tree

discussing things meant to be.

Said one to the others, now listen you two,

there’s a rumor going round that can’t be true,

that man descended from our noble race

the very idea is  a great disgrace.

No monkey has ever deserted his wife

starved her babies and ruined her life

and you’ve never known a mother monk

to leave her babies with others to bunk,

or pass from one onto another

till they scarcely  know who is their mother.

Here’s another thing a monkey won’t do

go out at night and get on a stew

or use a gun or club or knife

to take some other monkey’s life

yes, man descended, the ornery cuss

but brother, he didn’t descend from us.


I dialed a wrong number and got the following recording:  “I am not available right now, but thank you for caring enough to call.  I am making some changes in my life.  Please leave a message after the beep. If I do not return your call, you are one of the changes.”


“A day without laughter is a day wasted.”

Charlie Chaplin


When the new patient was settled comfortably on the couch, the psychiatrist began his therapy session.  “I’m not aware of your  problem,” the doctor said.  “So perhaps, you should start at the very beginning.”

“Of course,” replied the patient.  “In the beginning, I created the Heavens and the Earth…”


Feeling sorry for yourself, and your present condition, is not only a waste of energy but the worst habit you could possibly have.

Dale Carnegie


Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

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