I am a quick study – I can memorize a script in an hour – but I can’t remember a name three seconds.
OK, I’ll admit it I have gone into memory overload. I am sure that is the reason why I keep having so much trouble remembering names, even the names of some folks I have known for years. I keep telling my wife I have a six step memory, I remember the name of somebody I recognize after I have walked past them by at least six steps. It is made even more frustrating since I have met so many people in my later life that almost everyone looks familiar. Fortunately I am old enough that most people seem to understand and chalk it up to my obvious semi-senility.
While my problem does often cause me some discomfort I have learned to live with my condition by reverting frequently to universal names such as buddy, old friend, pal, darlin’ and the like. I also have learned I am not in it alone in the “oh what was his name?” reality since so many of my younger friends seem to have the same problem.
Not remembering a name sometime happens to the best of us, even the brilliant bestselling author Gretchen Rubin admits to occasionally forgetting the name of someone she is talking to. Here is something she wrote some time ago on how we might mask our temporary loss of name memory.
Six Tips for Coping with the Fact that You’ve Forgotten Someone’s Name.
I’ve developed some strategies for coping with the fact that I’m not able to pull up a person’s name right away. Of course, you can always just say politely, “I’m sorry, I don’t recall your name,” but if you’d rather try to disguise your forgetfulness a bit, give these a try:
1. The “I know your name, but I’m blocked” dodge: “I keep wanting to call you “David,” but I know that’s not right.”
2. The “Of course I know you — in fact, I want all your information” dodge: “Hey, I’d love to get your card.”
3. The “The tip of my tongue” dodge: “I know I know your name, but I’m blanking right now.”
4. The “You’re brilliant!” dodge: “Wow, you have a terrific memory. I can’t believe you remember my name from that meeting six months ago. I can’t remember the names of people I met yesterday! So of course I have to ask you your name.”
5. The “Sure, I remember you” dodge: “Remind me – what’s your last name?” If you ask a person for his last name, he’s likely to repeat both names. “Doe, John Doe.”
6. The “One-sided introduction” dodge: “Hey,” you say to the person whose name you can’t remember, “let me introduce you to Pat Smith.” You introduce the two and say the name of the person whose name you remember. Almost always, the nameless person will volunteer his or her name.
Also, remember that others might have trouble remembering your name. When you’re saying hello to someone, err on the side of re-introducing yourself. “Hi, John, it’s Gretchen Rubin.” Say your name slowly and clearly. And don’t get offended if someone doesn’t remember your name! And while you’re at it, remember to smile. It really does make a difference in how friendly you’re perceived to be.
“Blessed are the forgetful, for they get the better even of their blunders.”
A man goes into a drug store and asks the pharmacist if he can give him something for the hiccups. The pharmacist promptly reaches out and slaps the man’s face.
“What did you do that for?” the man asks.
“Well, you don’t have the hiccups anymore do you?”
The man says, “No, but my wife out in the car still does!”
First you forget names, then you forget faces, then you forget to pull your zipper up, then you forget to pull your zipper down.
Carlson’s Consolation: Nothing is ever a complete failure; it can always serve as a bad example.
Strategies For Making People Fall In Love With You:
“Tell them that you own a whole bunch of candy stores.” — Del, age 6
“Shake your hips and hope for the best.” — Camille, age 9
“Yell out that you love them at the top of your lungs…and don’t worry if their parents are right there.” — Manuel, age 8
“Don’t do things like have smelly, green sneakers. You might get attention, but attention ain’t the same thing as love.” — Alonzo, age 9
“One way is to take the girl out to eat. Make sure it’s something she likes to eat. French fries usually works for me.” — Bart, age 9
One reason why computers can do more work than people is that they never have to stop and answer the phone.
A college professor had the mysterious habit of removing a tennis ball from his jacket pocket as he walked into the lecture hall each morning. He would set it on the corner of the podium. After giving the lecture for the day, he would once again pick up the tennis ball, place it into his jacket pocket, and leave the room. No one ever understood why he did this, until one day …
A student fell asleep during the lecture. The professor didn’t miss a word of his lecture while he walked over to the podium, picked up the tennis ball, and threw it, hitting the sleeping student squarely on the top of the head.
The next day, the professor walked into the room, reached into his jacket, removed a baseball … No one ever fell asleep in his class the rest of the semester!
I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it..
W. C. Fields
He said: Tired of having to balance his wife Cindy’s checkbook, Mike made a deal with her; he would look at it, but only after she had spent a few hours trying to wrestle it into shape. The following night, after spending hours poring over stubs and figures, Cindy said proudly, “I’ve done it! I made it balance!”
Impressed, Mike came over to take a look. “Let’s see… mortgage 550.00, electricity 70.50, phone 35.00.” His brow wrinkled as he read the last entry. “It says here ESP, $615. What the heck is that?”
“Oh,” she said, “That means, Error Some Place!”
“Always remember to slow down in life; live, breathe, and learn; take a look around you whenever you have time and never forget everything and every person that has the least place within your heart.”
Stay well, do good work, and have fun.
Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.
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