Ray's musings and humor

Dream On

Those who dream by day are cognizant of many things which escape those who dream only by night.

Edgar Allan Poe

dream_on_distant_shores

Wow, my weekend was full and left me with little time for banking sleep. Between a farmers market, Street Festival, a Frank Sinatra tribute show, a graduation party and the graduation of two grandchildren and more I am pooped. And now here it is the wee hours of the morning and I am off to exercise, a breakfast meeting, appointments and another full day. There is now doubt that anything I send you this morning will be easier to read than what I might create so here is another Daily from yesteryear.

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Ray’s Daily first published on May 20, 2005

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I am sure you have walked the beaches of the world, met the most interesting people, relished the adventure, and performed amazing feats as the years have gone by. It is wonderful that our imagination can take us anywhere as we dream our dreams. One of the great things that come from what we read are the dreams that reading can trigger. Even though we all must live in the real world, we all have been given the capacity to hide out once in a while in our dreams. And you know what, sometimes dreams turn into reality and we find ourselves in places we never thought we would be and that enriches our lives.

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Dream what you want to dream. Go where you want to go, be who you want to be…But remember to enjoy every step of life’s journey. It’s easy to become so focused on a goal that the rest of life passes unnoticed…even unappreciated. It’s important to remember that the essence of each day is unique and fleeting. Minutes are grains of sand that slip all too quickly through our fingers, leaving only memories. So follow your dream–wherever it may lead you and remember to enjoy each and every step along the way.

Renee Duvall

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The latest reports say that President Bush is going to double the reward for capturing Osama Bin Laden from $25 million to $50 million dollars. $50 million, which sounds like a lot until you think the Mets spent $119 million to get Carlos Beltran.

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Research shows the first five minutes of life can be the most risky. Somehow I think that the last five minutes aren’t so hot either.

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PRAYERS AROUND THE ZODIAC

ARIES: Dear God, please give me patience … and could you do it right now? TAURUS: Dear God, help me accept change, but let’s do it my way. GEMINI: Dear God! Who is God? Where is God? Why is God? CANCER: Dear God!!! LEO: Yes? Hello God…are you listening to me? VIRGO: Dear God, please make us perfect and don’t mess it up like you did the last time. LIBRA: Dear God, please help me to be decisive, but on the other hand, what do you think is best? SCORPIO: Our Father, forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors, even though the low-life scum don’t deserve it! SAGITTARIUS: Dear Lord, if I’ve told you once, I’ve told you a million times, help me stop exaggerating. CAPRICORN: Dear God! I’d like to ask you to help me, but I learned a long time ago not to rely on anyone else! AQUARIUS: Dear God, I know I like change, but this chaos is ridiculous!! PISCES: Dear Lord, as long as I’m going to drink this fifth of Scotch tonight, please use the stimulation for Thy glory.

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There is a difference between happiness and wisdom: He that thinks himself the happiest man really is so; but he that thinks himself the wisest is generally the greatest fool.

Charles Caleb Colton

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Wendy tips on how to age with a smile: Any woman can have the body of a 21-year-old……..as long as she buys him a few drinks first. My memory’s not as sharp as it used to be. Also, my memory’s not as sharp as it used to be. Know how to prevent sagging? Just eat ’til the wrinkles fill out. I’ve still got it, but nobody wants to see it. I’m getting into swing dancing. Not on purpose Some parts of my body are just prone to swinging. It’s scary when you start making the same noises as your coffeemaker. I think I’ve reached my sexpiration date. People our age can still enjoy an active passionate sex life! Provided we get that cable or dish thing. The good news is, that even as we get older, guys still look at our boobs. The bad news is, they have to squat down first. These days, about half the stuff in my shopping cart says, “For fast relief”. I’ve tried to find a suitable exercise video for women my age, but they haven’t made one called “Buns of Putty”. Don’t think of it as getting hot flashes. Think of it as your inner child playing with matches. Don’t let aging get you down. It’s too hard to get back up. Remember: you don’t stop laughing because you grow old, you grow old because you stop laughing.

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Minds are like parachutes, they only function when open.

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Late one Friday night, I was awakened by the ringing of my phone…In a sleepy grumpy voice I said, “Hello.” The party on the other end of the line paused for a moment before rushing breathlessly into a lengthy speech. “OK… Mom, this is Marsha and I’m sorry I woke you up, but I had to call because I’m going to be a little late getting home. See, Daddy’s car has a flat but it’s not my fault. Really! I don’t know what happened. The tire just went flat while John and I were inside the theater. Please don’t be mad, okay?” Since I don’t have any daughters, I knew the person had misdialed. “I’m sorry dear, “I replied, “but you’ve reached the wrong number. I don’t have a daughter named Marsha.” “Come on, Mom,” pleaded the young woman’s voice, “I didn’t think you’d be this mad.”

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“If you haven’t got anything nice to say about anybody, come sit next to me.”

Alice Roosevelt Longworth

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“I had the toughest time of my life. First, I got angina pectoris and then arteriosclerosis. Just as I was recovering from these, I got tuberculosis, double pneumonia and phthisis. Then they gave me hypodermics. Appendicitis was followed by tonsillectomy. These gave way to aphasia and hypertrophic cirrhosis. I completely lost my memory for a while. I know I had diabetes and acute ingestion, besides gastritis, rheumatism, lumbago and neuritis. I don’t know how I pulled through it. It was the hardest spelling test I’ve ever had.”

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Laugh alone and the world thinks you’re an idiot.

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A cat dies and goes to Heaven. God meets him at the gate and says, “You have been a good cat all of these years. Anything you desire is yours, all you have to do is ask.” The cats says, “Well, I lived all my life with a poor family on a farm and had to sleep on hardwood floors.” God says, “Say no more.” And instantly, a fluffy pillow appears. A few days later, 6 mice are killed in a tragic accident and they go to Heaven. God meets them at the gate with the same offer that He made the cat. The mice said, “All our lives we’ve had to run. Cats, dogs and even women with brooms have chased us. If we could only have a pair of roller skates, we wouldn’t have to run anymore.” God says, “Say no more.” And instantly, each mouse is fitted with a beautiful pair of tiny roller skates. About a week later, God decides to check and see how the cat is doing. The cat is sound asleep on his new pillow. God gently wakes him and asks, “How are you doing? Are you happy here?” The cat yawns and stretches and says, “Oh, I’ve never been happier in my life. And those Meals on Wheels you’ve been sending over are the best!”

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“Action may not always bring happiness; but there is no happiness without action.”

Benjamin Disraeli

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Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

This daily is sent only to special people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are about 2000 readers from around the world.

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