Ray's musings and humor

“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.”

Ralph Waldo Emerson

 ! Be yourself

Note: This will be the last Daily for a week or so as I will be on special assignment and rather than burden the staff with creating new ones while I am busy we are suspending operations. If you need something to do there are 1,500 or so past Dailies at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/.

Since you might want something to do while I am gone why not commit to doing what will make you happy, Ralph Marston calls it singing to your own special songs. So while I am busy for a while I will look forward to listening to your song. Here is what Marston has shared with us.

 

Your own special songs

Allow yourself to be yourself. If you don’t want what the world says you should want, have the courage to say so.

Your greatest opportunities for making a difference in this world flow from your unique perspective. Explore, strengthen, celebrate and express that perspective every chance you get.

It’s not a matter of being different just to be different. It’s a matter of being honest with yourself and others about who you truly are.

You have your own special songs to sing. Sing them with passion, just because it feels so right.

What the world tells you is to be like everybody else. What the world needs is for you to be you.

Give to life the unique beauty of your own special making. Allow yourself to feel how good it feels, and to see what a positive difference the real you can make for everyone.

~~~

“When you are content to be simply yourself and don’t compare or compete, everyone will respect you.”

Lao Tzu

~~~

Father Murphy roared from the pulpit to his parishioners: “The drink has killed millions– it rots their stomachs and they die in agony. Smoking has killed millions–it coats your lungs and you die in agony. Overeating and consorting with loose women have also killed millions.”

“Scuse me, Father,” hollered O’Reilly from the back, “but what is it that kills the people who live right?”

~~~

Wife says to her husband, “What did the doctor say!”

“He said I should slow down.”

And her comeback is, “How does a man who has been rear-ended by a recliner slow down?”

~~~

Truth has no special time of its own. Its hour is now – always.

Albert Schweitzer

~~~

Jewish Weddings

What are the main differences between orthodox, conservative and reform???

At an orthodox wedding, the mother of the bride is likely to be pregnant.

At a conservative wedding, the bride is likely to be pregnant.

At a reform wedding, the Rabbi is likely to be pregnant.

And at a reconstructionist wedding, the groom is likely to be pregnant.

~~~

I know you can be overwhelmed, and I know you can be underwhelmed, but can you just be whelmed?

~~~

A fourth grade teacher was giving her pupils a lesson in logic.

“Here is the situation,” she said. “A man is standing up in a boat in the middle of a river, fishing. He loses his balance, falls in, and begins splashing and yelling for help. His wife hears the commotion, knows he can’t swim, and runs down to the bank. Why do you think she ran to the bank?”

Little Mary raised her hand and asked, “To draw out all his savings?”

~~~

The pilot announced that “the weather at our destination is 50 degrees with some broken clouds, but they’ll try to have them fixed before we arrive”.

~~~

Jane had a system for labeling homemade freezer meals. She would carefully note in large clear letters, “Meatloaf” or “Pot Roast” or “Steak and Vegetables” or “Chicken and Dumplings” or “Beef Pot Pie.”

Everyday when she asked her husband what he wanted for dinner, he never asked for any of those meals. She decided to stock the freezer with his various requests. What he really likes.

In Jane’s freezer now you’ll see a whole new set of labels. You’ll find dinners with neat little tags that say: “Whatever,” “Anything,” “I Don’t Know,” “I Don’t Care,” “Something Good,” or “Food.”

No more frustration for Jane because no matter what her husband replies when she asks him what he wants for dinner, it’s there waiting.

~~~

“Between the optimist and the pessimist, the difference is droll.

The optimist sees the doughnut; the pessimist the hole!”

Oscar Wilde

~~~

A couple was celebrating their golden wedding anniversary on the beach in Montego Bay, Jamaica. Their domestic tranquility had long been the talk of the town.

“What a peaceful & loving couple.” everyone would say.

The local newspaper reporter was inquiring as to the secret of their long and happy marriage.

“Well, it actually dates back to our honeymoon in America,” explained the man. “We visited the Grand Canyon in Arizona and took a trip down to the bottom of the canyon by horse. We hadn’t gone too far when my wife’s horse stumbled and she almost fell off. My wife looked down at the horse and quietly said, ‘That’s once.’

“We proceeded a little further and the horse stumbled again, this time causing her to drop her water. Once more my wife quietly said, ‘That’s twice.’

We hadn’t gone a half-mile when the horse stumbled for a third time. My wife quietly removed a revolver from her purse and shot the horse dead. I shouted at her, ‘What’s wrong with you, Woman! Why did you shoot the poor animal like that? Are you crazy??’ ”

She looked at me, and quietly said, ‘That’s once.’

“And from that moment… we have lived happily ever after.”

~~~

“My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.”

Rodney Dangerfield

~~~

A doctor said to his patient: “You have a slight heart condition, but I wouldn’t worry about it.”

“Really, Doc?” the patient replied. “Well, if you had a slight heart condition I wouldn’t worry about it either.”

~~~

All my life I had been looking for something, and everywhere I turned someone tried to tell me what it was.  I accepted their answers too, though they were often in contradiction and even self-contradictory.  I was naïve.  I was looking for myself and asking everyone except myself questions which I, and only I, could answer.  It took me a long time and much painful boomeranging of my expectations to achieve a realization everyone else appears to have been born with:  that I am nobody but myself.

Ralph Ellison

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

This daily is sent only to special people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are about 2000 readers from around the world.

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