Ray's musings and humor

Be safe! Have fun! But more importantly; just live your life to the fullest!

Hey we have a weekend coming up, how about we have some fun and enjoy the next couple of days. I’ll even do all your worrying for you so you can set your problems aside for a while. Don’t be like those who have convinced themselves that they are too busy or even worse forgotten how to let go and enjoy life.

I wonder sometimes if too many of us have been conditioned to believe that only the biggest, the flashiest, most expensive or currently fashionable will provide us enjoyment. I am afraid that when we chase that elusive brass ring we seldom get it and when we do find it turns out to not be all that great. What disappoints me is many of us waste our time in our work or chasing rainbows and then miss so much in life that has intrinsic joy that is only unleashed if we stop and let it work its magic.

As an example I would like to go to New York and see the latest Broadway Show or buy tickets to every road show that comes to my city but I have found that as often as not I did not enjoy what I see as much as I thought I would, of course I really can’t not afford too many in the first place. Fortunately I have found plenty of enjoyment in regional theater, both professional and amateur. I think my secret of enjoying so much of what I see is that I am ready to like the performers. Sadly some of my companions often expect to dislike what they see and only like it when the performers knock their socks off. Sometime I feel like knocking something else off of them when they try to tell me that I should not enjoy life as much as I do.

Want some enjoyment ideas? Try some of these:

Have a good meal. Don’t just eat. Taste it and appreciate its richness.

Feel music and not just listen to it.

Gather with old friends.

Take a walk in the park.

Go hiking.

Read a novel.

Find and watch a movie you like.

Give yourself a lazy day.

Play board games with your friends.

Have a candle-light dinner with your partner.

See beautiful pictures.

Read inspiring quotes.

Read a classic book.

Exercise with friends.

Watch funny videos.

Play with kids.

Have a cup of coffee.

Get a massage.

Go to a museum.

Go to a theater.

Watch sunrise.

Take pictures.

Browse your photo album for your treasured memories.

My bottom line, if you expect to enjoy the simple things in life you can, if you expect to be disappointed you will be. OK now I’ll tell you the truth, I will not worry for you this weekend I hired a professional fretter to worry for both you and me, so now go out and have fun, just don’t get arrested.

~~~

“You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself any direction you choose. You’re on your own. And you know what you know. And YOU are the one who’ll decide where to go…”

Dr. Seuss,

~~~

Boy do I buy into this one.

“The length of a film should be directly related to the endurance of the human bladder.”

Alfred Hitchcock

~~~

Little Nancy wailed over her doll, crushed by car tires when her mother had backed over it. Finally, her mother had heard enough, “Don’t come crying to me. I told you not to leave it on the porch!”

~~~

“Forgiveness does not change the past, but it does enlarge the future.”

Paul Boese

~~~

A man is driving with his wife at his side and his mother-in-law in the backseat.

The women just won’t leave him alone.

His mother-in-law says, “You’re driving too fast!”

His wife says, “Stay more to the left.”

After ten mixed orders, the man turns to his wife and asks, “Who’s driving this car – you or your mother?”

~~~

I saw a movie with a happy ending.  Everyone was glad it was over.

~~~

A little girl was watching her parents dress for a party. When she saw her dad donning his tuxedo, she warned, “Daddy, you shouldn’t wear that suit.”

“And why not, darling?”

“You know that it always gives you a headache next morning.”

~~~

Did you know that dolphins are so intelligent that within only a few weeks of captivity, they can train Americans to stand at the very edge of the pool and throw them fish?

~~~

Things I’ve Learned From The Movies

Large, loft-style apartments in New York City are well within the price range of most people-whether they are employed or not.

Should you decide to defuse a bomb, don’t worry which wire to cut.  You will always choose the right one.

Most laptop computers are powerful enough to override the communications system of any invading alien society.

It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts-your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one by dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked out their predecessors.

If you are blonde and pretty, it is possible to become a world expert on nuclear fission at the age of 22.

Rather than wasting bullets, megalomaniacs prefer to kill their archenemies using complicated machinery involving fuses, pulley systems, deadly gasses, lasers, and man-eating sharks, which will allow their captives at least 20 minutes to escape.

All beds have special L-shaped cover sheets that reach up to the armpit level on a woman but only to waist level on the man lying beside her.

All grocery shopping bags contain at least one loaf of French bread.

Once applied, makeup will never rub off-even while scuba diving.

A man will show no pain while taking the most ferocious beating but will wince when a woman tries to clean his wounds.

If staying in a haunted house, women should investigate any strange noises in their most revealing underwear.

All bombs are fitted with electronic timing devices with large red readouts so you know exactly when they’re going to go off.

If you decide to start dancing in the street, everyone you meet will know all the steps.

When they are alone, all foreign military officers prefer to speak to each other in English.

~~~

There are many wonderful things that will never be done if you do not do them.

Charles D. Gill

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

This daily is sent only to special people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@gmail.com. Back issues are posted at https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are about 2000 readers from around the world.

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