No passion so effectually robs the mind of all its powers of acting and reasoning as fear.
I attended a great meeting yesterday where we discussed how we might help retirees have more fun in their lives even if they don’t live on a golf course or in a retirement community. As I thought about the conversations later I decided that what holds most of us back from much of life’s fun is a misguided lack of confidence sometimes bordering on fear. You know the feeling, it starts with a belief that “I probably can’t do it so why try”, or “What will people think if I fail or I am not good it.” I hate to think how many wins we have missed because we were unwilling to play. You know that wall that so often holds us back was not placed there by someone else, we built it and we can tear it down. Here is what I copied off a wise woman’s blog that I offer to you as demolition tools to help you to remove what might be holding you back
How to Overcome Fear + Live the Life You Deserve
- Do something brand new. Be a beginner. Be open to the different and the difficult. Push yourself. Follow someone’s lead. Ask questions. Try. Fail. Try again. Fail again. Succeed.
- Focus on what needs to be done. Take small calculated steps to get to your end goal. Don’t give your fear attention or energy. Let it die a slow death. Build your courage muscles one action step at a time.
- Let go of what you don’t want and visualize what you do. Stop running negative images in your mind of bad things happening. Create the image of the outcome you want and dwell on it. Work towards it. Each time you feel fearful replace it with your image of success.
- Take your fear to the gym. When you are stuck in fear and feel paralyzed by negativity, get active. Lift weights, run, or walk off your fear. Move physically. Motivate yourself with a play list of positive songs
- Use affirmations and quotes. I write down positive quotes and affirmations on index cards and put them in my car, bathroom, bedroom and kitchen. It only takes a few minutes to see things differently and change my calm my emotions.
- Release attack thoughts and negativity. We project our own negativity and fear when we get caught up in drama and become envious of the success of others. Somebody else’s success has nothing to do with yours. Focus on taking action on your own behalf. Choose to be happy for people who get what you want. Learn to say and mean, “Good for them.”
- Change your perception and change your story. Stop doubting yourself. Become aware of the stories you tell yourself about your self-worth, intelligence, strengths, and possibilities. Own your greatness. Create stories that resonate with the beautiful person you are. No one else can do it for you.
- Create new expectations. Expect to succeed. Tell yourself things are going well. Know that people want to help you. Spin new stories about the future. You have a choice. You can expect the best or the worst. Why wouldn’t you choose the best?
- Replace fear with fun. Fear can lead to a work addiction. When you lack balance in your life it shows up in your relationships, business, and health. Carve out time to laugh and play. Get away from all electronics and get your fun meter running. Dance, hike, begin a new hobby, and laugh as often as possible.
The alternative to facing your fears is that your fears will control you. Don’t miss out on opportunities. Don’t cheat the people who will benefit from your gifts. Live is meant to be lived out loud and in joy. This is your time. This is you life. Live it with gutsy, risk-taking, glory.
The author of the blog got this from Tess Marshall the founder of The Bold Life, where she inspires people to live a fearless life.
The cave you fear to enter holds the treasure you seek.
The shipwrecked mariner had spent several years on a deserted island. Then one morning he was thrilled to see a ship offshore and a smaller vessel pulling out toward him.
When the boat grounded on the beach, the officer in charge handed the marooned sailor a bundle of newspapers and told him, “The captain said to read through these and let us know if you still want to be rescued.”
I had amnesia once or twice. I think.
One night a wife found her husband standing over their newborn baby’s crib. Silently she watched him. As he stood looking down at the sleeping infant, she saw on his face a mixture of emotions; disbelief, doubt, delight, amazement, enchantment, and skepticism. Touched by this unusual display and the deep emotions it aroused, with eyes glistening she slipped her arms around her husband.
“A penny for your thoughts.” she whispered in his ear.
“It’s amazing!” he replied. “I just can’t see how anybody can make a crib like that for only $46.50!”
TEAMWORK…means never having to take all the blame yourself.
A stalwart Vermont farmer bought some land that was still just as it had been before the Pilgrims landed. He dug up hundreds of stones and built a fence; cut down trees to create a clearing; built a house and a small barn; cleared land for pasture, dug a well and over several years just generally worked his fingers to the bone in creating a small, neat, productive farm.
Eventually his pastor came out for a visit and marveled rather fulsomely, and at great length, at all that “you and God have done together.”
“Eh,” the farmer said dubiously. “Ya shoulda seen the place when God ran it on his own.”
If you can stay calm, while all around you is chaos…then you probably haven’t completely understood the seriousness of the situation.
The kid’s advice to the pastor:
Dear Pastor, I think a lot more people would come to your church if you moved it to Disneyland. Loreen. Age 9. Tacoma
Dear Pastor, I liked your sermon where you said that good health is more important than money but I still want a raise in my allowance. Sincerely, Eleanor. Age 12, Sarasota
Dear Pastor, Please pray for all the airline pilots. I am flying to California tomorrow. Laurie. Age 10, New York City
Dear Pastor, I hope to go to heaven some day but later than sooner. Love, Ellen, age 9. Athens
Dear Pastor, Please say a prayer for our Little League team. We need God’s help or a new pitcher. Thank you. Alexander. Age 10, Raleigh
You call it caution. You call it common sense. You call it practicality. You call it playing the odds, but that’s only because you’re afraid to call it by its real name, and its real name is fear.
Stay well, do good work, and have fun.
Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.
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