Ray's musings and humor

It works for me

Perfection itself is imperfection.

Vladimir Horowitz

 

It is going to be another full day with meetings, doctor appointments and an anniversary dinner. Tomorrow is even busier starting with 6:45 AM tests at the hospital, a raft of meetings followed by a late evening dinner and musical comedy so there will be NO DAILY tomorrow.

While I do have to rush off soon there is something I would like to share with you. Years ago I met a public health expert while we were working with UNICEF, CDC, USAID and others to protect the health of children in Eastern Europe after the fall of the former Soviet Union. Recently this acquaintance/friend sent me the following poem. While I don’t think I could follow its guidance on a full time basis I do think that I will take a day every once in awhile and take advantage of its therapeutic value.

Imperfection

Elizabeth Carlson

I am falling in love with my imperfections

The way I never get the sink really clean,

     forget to check my oil,

     lose my car in parking lots,

     miss appointments I have written down,

     am just a little late.

I am learning to love

      the small bumps on my face

      the big bump of my nose,

      my hairless scalp,

      chipped nail polish,

      toes that overlap.

Learning to love

      the open-ended mystery

            of not knowing why

I am learning to fail

      to make lists,

      use my time wisely,

      read the books I should.

Instead I practice inconsistency,

      irrationality, forgetfulness.

Probably I should

      hang my clothes neatly in the closet

      all the shirts together, then the pants,

      send Christmas cards, or better yet

      a letter telling of my perfect family.

But I’d rather waste time

      listening to the rain,

      or lying underneath my cat learning to purr.

I used to fill every moment

     with something I could cross off later.

Perfect was

     the laundry done and folded

     all my papers graded

     the whole truth and nothing      but

Now the empty mind is what I seek

      the formless shape

      the strange off center

      sometimes fictional me.

~~~

Persuade thyself that imperfection and inconvenience are the natural lot of mortals, and there will be no room for discontent, neither for despair.

Ieyasu Tokugawa

~~~

The following are a few simple ways to keep burglars out of the house by putting a few signs in well-placed locations.

  •       Dear Mr. Butcher, starting tomorrow, please leave eight pounds of meat for Brutus. Six pounds only makes him angry and vicious!

  •       Dear Mr. Mailman, we found bloodstains all over our mail. They must be yours. The next time you put mail into our slot, please be sure to keep all parts of your body well clear of all openings. P.S.  – Any sign of that book we sent for, “The Care and Feeding of Wild Jungle Cats”?

  •       Dear Mr. Exterminator, be very careful when you go inside! The termites have eaten through most of the floorboards and you will fall into the basement where all of the rats are!

  •       To whom it may concern: Some of the items in this house have been engraved with Federal Identification Numbers. Others have merely been wired to explode when touched. Good luck…

  •       Selma, don’t come in! The boa constrictor got loose again…

~~~

Kindness is difficult to give away because it keeps coming back.

~~~

If you want to catch beasts you don’t see everyday,

You have to go places quite out-of-the-way.

You have to go places no others can get to.

You have to get cold, and you have to get wet, too.

Dr. Seuss

~~~

Isn’t the only time a woman wishes she were a year older be when she is expecting a baby?

~~~

Bill was a frequent user of a pay telephone at a popular truck stop, and was greatly inconvenienced when the phone went out of commission. Repeated requests for repair brought only promises.

After several days, Bill again contacted the phone company and told that there was no longer a rush. The phone was now working fine… except that all money was being returned upon completion of each call.

A repairman arrived within the hour!

~~~

A fool and his money are never around when you need them.

~~~

An elderly lady was known for her faith and her boldness in talking about it. She would stand on her front porch and shout “Praise the Lord!”

Next door to her lived an atheist who would get angry at her proclamations and he would shout, “There ain’t no Lord!”

Hard times set in on the elderly lady and she prayed to God to send her some assistance… She stood on her front porch and shouted, “Praise the Lord…God I need food!! I am having a hard time. Please, Lord, send me some groceries.”

The next morning the lady went out on her porch, noted a large bag of groceries and she shouted, “Praise the Lord.”

The neighbor jumped up from behind a bush and said, “Ha ha.. I told you there was no Lord. I bought those groceries. God didn’t.”

The lady started jumping up and down and clapping her hands and saying, “Praise the Lord. He not only sent me groceries but He made the devil pay for them. PRAISE THE LORD.”

~~~

“This is a new dress. Do you like it? It’s from my favorite designer, On Sale.”

Rita Rudner

~~~

The customer in the Italian restaurant was so pleased that he asked to speak to the chef. The owner proudly led him into the kitchen and introduced him to the chef.

“Your veal parmigiana was superb,” the customer said. “I just spent a month in Italy, and yours is better than any I ever had over there.”

“Naturally,” the chef said. “Over there, they use domestic cheese. Ours is imported.”

~~~

“Sometimes we strive so hard for perfection that we forget that imperfection is happiness”

Karen Nave

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

 Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

 

This daily is sent only to special people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@yahoo.com. Back issues are posted at http://raykiwsp.multiply.com/journal and https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are about 2000 readers from around the world.

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