Ray's musings and humor

It is time to live

Pleasure is the flower that passes; remembrance, the lasting perfume.

Jean de Boufflers

 

 

 

Sorry all, I am running today with early morning meetings and ringing bells for the Salvation Army outside in the sub-freezing cold there is not enough time for a new Daily so you’ll be getting another from the past. Have a great weekend and I’ll be back on Monday.

Ray

~~~

Ray’s Daily first published December 17, 2003

This is the season filled with the memories of old and new friends. There seems to be a burst of warmth all around us as we are greeted, hugged, and remembered. At the same time many of us remember those no longer with us. Most led full and rewarding lives while others just never got to do all they wanted. As we set our sights on the coming year I thought this letter written by an 83 year old lady provides the wisdom we need to plan the future.

 

   Dear Friend,

Just a note to let you know that I’m reading more and dusting less. I’m sitting in the yard and admiring the view without fussing about the weeds in the garden. I’m spending more time with my family and friends and less time working. Whenever possible, life should be a pattern of experiences to savor, not to endure.

I’m trying to recognize these moments now and cherish them. I’m not “saving” anything; I use my good china and crystal for every special event such as losing a pound, getting the sink unstopped, or the first Amaryllis blossom. I wear my good blazer to the market. My theory is if I look prosperous, I can shell out $28.49 for one small bag of groceries. I’m not saving my good perfume for special parties, but wearing it for clerks in the hardware store and tellers at the bank.

“Someday” and “one of these days” are losing their grip on my vocabulary. If it’s worth seeing or hearing or doing, I want to see and hear and do it now. I’m not sure what others would’ve done had they known they wouldn’t be here for the tomorrow that we all take for granted. I think they would have called family members and a few close friends. They might have called a few former friends to apologize and mend fences for past squabbles. I like to think they would have gone out for a Chinese dinner or for whatever their favorite food was. I’m guessing; I’ll never know.

It’s those little things left undone that would make me angry if I knew my hours were limited. Angry because I hadn’t written certain letters that I intended to write one of these days. Angry and sorry that I didn’t tell my family and parents often enough how much I truly love them. I’m trying very hard not to put off, hold back, or save anything that would add laughter and luster to our lives. And every morning when I open my eyes, tell myself that it is special. Every day, every minute, every breath truly is a gift from God.

~~~

You pile up enough tomorrows, and you’ll find you’ve collected a lot of empty yesterdays.

Harrold Hill

~~~

As you may know I am limited to one drink a day because of my health and my medications. In response I have abstained for months. Recently I learned that I can’t bank those drinks for when I go on my next cruise, so all I did was save some money and missed opportunities for some fun. So I have decided to permanently abstain from abstaining; I am confident I will be able to do so. I will savor and nurse my one drink, and I do know that it can’t be a double.

Ray

~~~

Rule #1 If you’re coasting, you’re going down hill.

Rule #2 If you’re not coasting, you’re not going down hill.

~~~

Women have something now called Marriage Anonymous.  When they feel like getting married, they call somebody and they send over a man in a dirty T-shirt who hasn’t shaved in three days, smells like stale beer, and whines at her to make him a snack while he lies on the couch, emits various bodily gases and their accompanying noises, and watches football.

~~~

When you talk about someone behind their back, they will be there someplace.

~~~

Andy Rooney On Answering Machines:

Did you ever hear one of these corny, positive messages on someone’s answering machine? “Hi, it’s a great day and I’m out enjoying it right now.  I hope you are, too.  The thought for the day is ‘share the love.’  Beep.’

“Uh, yeah…this is the VD clinic calling…. Speaking of being positive, your test results are back. Time to stop sharing the love”

~~~

“I have to have a raise,” the man said to his boss. “There are three other companies after me.”

“Is that so?” asked the manager. “What other companies are after you?”

“The electric company, the telephone company, and the gas company.”

~~~

99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.

~~~

The Sunday school teacher was carefully explaining the story of Elijah the Prophet and the false prophets of Baal. She explained how Elijah built the altar, put wood upon it, cut the steer in pieces and laid it upon the altar.

And then Elijah commanded the people of God to fill four barrels of water and pour it over the altar.  He had them do this four times.

“Now, said the teacher, “can anyone in the class tell me why the Lord would have Elijah pour water over the steer on the altar?”

A little girl in the back of the room raised her hand with great enthusiasm. “To make the gravy,” came her enthusiastic reply.

~~~

Support bacteria — they’re the only culture some of us have.

~~~

An angry wife was complaining about her husband spending all his time at the bar, so one night he took her along.

“What’ll ya have?” he asked.

“Oh, I don’t know. The same as you I suppose,” she replied.

So the husband ordered a couple of Jack Daniel’s and threw his down in one go. His wife watched him, then took a sip from her glass and immediately spat it out.

“Yuck, it’s nasty poison!” she spluttered. “I don’t know how you can drink this stuff!”

“Well, there you go,” cried the husband. “And you think I’m out enjoying myself every night!”

~~~

“Keep your children from killing themselves, or anyone else, and hope for the best.”

Erma Bombeck

~~~

A man takes his place in the theater, but his seat is too far from the stage.

He whispers to the usher, “This is a mystery, and I have to watch a mystery close up. Get me a better seat, and I’ll give you a handsome tip.”

The usher moves him into the second row, and the man hands the usher a quarter.

The usher leans over and whispers, “The wife did it.”

~~~

A man wrapped up in himself makes a very small bundle.

Benjamin Franklin

~~~

Esther was entranced with an expensive mink coat she had seen in an exclusive shop, and for days she cudgeled her brain to think of a way to bring up the subject to her husband. Suddenly she had an inspired thought.

“Sol, last night I had a lovely dream.”

“What kind of a dream, Esther?”

“I dreamed that we passed by Saks Fifth Avenue, and there in the window was this gorgeous mink coat — only $6,200. And you know what you did? You went right in and bought it for me, Sollie dear!”

“Say, that really was a wonderful dream! Hereafter, in all your dreams, you should wear it in good health, Esther dear!”

~~~

“Let us be a little humble; let us think that the truth may not perhaps be entirely with us.”

Jawaharlal Nehru

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

 Ray Mitchell

 Indianapolis, Indiana

 

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies. The editor is somewhat senile.

 

This daily is sent only to special people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can request to be added by e-mailing me at raykiwsp@yahoo.com. Back issues are posted at http://raykiwsp.multiply.com/journal and https://raykiwsp.wordpress.com/ currently there are about 2000 readers from around the world.

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