Ray's musings and humor

“Loneliness is never more cruel than when it is felt in close proximity with someone who has ceased to communicate”

Germaine Greer




There are so many people missing these days that I am starting to worry and feel a little isolated. Jen has totally disappeared and has not been seen at any of the old haunts. Dr A  has apparently started a new life leaving no forwarding address, Tyler obviously has gone into hiding as has S. Toledo. If that was not enough my Oasis friends operations center has moved to a secret location. Missing persons reports don’t generate any answers.

My concern is that I am missing something. Are there aliens from another planet snatching my friends away? Has anyone seen unmarked black helicopters abducting citizens off the street? Are there press gangs roaming the area capturing citizens to go on secret missions? Those I can still find don’t think it is any conspiracy or sinister plot and that it must be something I did.

Now I worry if it is me and I am being shunned for a reason, so I am taking action. Today I changed deodorants and have started to double check my attire before I go out to make sure everything is zipped, buttoned and arraigned properly. I also am concentrating more so I don’t call John, Shirley or Barbara, Tom for I have found some folks are not thrilled when I introduce them as an old and dear friend and then use someone else’s name.

I also have been taking some psychological action, as an example I sat with strangers the other day and had a passerby take my picture so I can show people that I still have a few friends, even if they are surrogates.

Possibly all of this is the reason I am being sent on secret assignment Thursday. Maybe the plan is to arrange for the return of my old friends at a welcome back surprise party. More likely it is to action me to go out and find others that I have yet to alienate. So if I should happen to show up at your door please at least pretend you are glad to see me.

Meanwhile I am off to meet some folks this morning that I think are still here. If they do show up I hope I can contain my excitement at being able to talk to real people instead of just the mental images of old friends.

Of course there is one real benefit, now I have more time to strengthen the bond between us. So old friend how’s it going today?


“The person who tries to live alone will not succeed as a human being. His heart withers if it does not answer another heart. His mind shrinks away if he hears only the echoes of his own thoughts and finds no other inspiration.”

Pearl S. Buck



During our routine sweep of the Internet we, the Internet Police, have discovered that you have been on your chair in front of the computer TOO LONG!

You are HEREBY ORDERED to clean up that pile of cups, cans, wrappers and papers on your desk (yes, we can see you — sit up straight!) and after you have logged into the real world for a minimum of ten minutes you may log back on to the Internet.

Failure to comply may result in loss of reality, carpal tunnel syndrome, and the requirement of a larger chair. The timer starts NOW!

Get off your butt — you’ll thank us for it later.


Upon her engagement the exuberant young woman went to her mother and said, "I’ve found a man just like father!"

Her mother replied, "So what do you want from me, sympathy?"


A congregant asked his Rabbi, "Rabbi, you’re a man of God. So why is it that you are always talking business when I, a businessman, am always talking about spiritual matters when I’m not at work?"

"You have discovered one of the principles of human nature," the Rabbi replied.

"And what principle is that, Rabbi?"

"People like to discuss things they know nothing about."


"Don’t worry… be happy."

Bobby McFerrin


Ah, life’s mysteries.

A man is a person who, if a woman says, "Never mind, I’ll do it myself; lets her.

A woman is a person who, if she says to a man, "Never mind, I’ll do it myself," and he lets her; gets mad.

A man is a person who, if a woman says to him, "Never mind, I’ll do it myself," and he lets her and she get mad; says, "Now what are you mad about?"

A woman is a person who, if she says to a man, "Never mind, I’ll do it myself," and he lets her and she get mad, and he says, "Now what are mad about?" says, "If you don’t know I’m not going to tell you."


"The young do not know enough to be prudent, and therefore they attempt the impossible, and achieve it, generation after generation."

Pearl S. Buck


The Reverend Billy Graham tells of a time early in his career when he arrived in a small town to preach a sermon. Wanting to mail a letter, he asked a young boy directions to the post office.

 After being told the way by the lad, the Reverend Graham thanked him, adding: "If you’ll come to the Baptist church this evening, you can hear me telling everyone how to get to Heaven.

 "I don’t think I’ll be there," the boy said.  "You don’t even know your way to the post office."    


"If you never did, you should.

These things are fun, and fun is good."

Dr. Seuss


Two rural church deacons who were having a sociable beer in the local tavern when they saw their minister drive by and take a good long look at their pickup trucks parked outside.

One deacon ducked down and said, "I hope the reverend didn’t see us or recognize my pickup."

The other replied indifferently, "What difference does it make.  God knows we’re in here…  and he’s the only one who counts."

The first deacon countered, "But God won’t tell my wife."


If you want to know what God thinks of money, just look at the people he gave it to.

Dorothy Parker


"You look sad, Fred, what’s the trouble," asked Bill.

"Domestic trouble."

"But you’re always bragging that your wife is a pearl," says Bill.

"She really is," replies Fred.  It’s the mother-of-pearl that’s giving me trouble!" 


Remember that there is no happiness in having or in getting, but only in giving. Reach out. Share. Smile. Hug. Happiness is a perfume you cannot pour on others without getting a few drops on yourself.

Og Mandino


Stay well, do good work, and have fun.


Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies.

The editor is somewhat senile.


This daily is sent only to special people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can join at http://groups.google.com/group/Rays-Daily. Back issues are posted at http://raykiwsp.multiply.com/journal currently there are about 2000 readers from around the world.

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