Ray's musings and humor

Mirth is like a flash of lightning, that breaks through a gloom of clouds, and glitters for a moment; cheerfulness keeps up a kind of daylight in the mind, and fills it with a steady and perpetual serenity.

Joseph Addison

 

 

 

One of the great things about my week away from negativism and the strident arguments going on these days is that it lets me spend time in the minds of others who offer suggestions on how we might find the path to some level of reasonable serenity. As an example here is an offering by Nancye Simms that I really like.

Don’t undermine your worth by comparing yourself with others. It is because we are different that each of us is special.

Don’t set your goals by what other people deem important. Only you know what is best for you.

Don’t take for granted the things closest to your heart. Cling to them as you would your life, for without them life is meaningless.

Don’t let your life slip through your fingers by living in the past or for the future by living your life one day at a time.

Don’t give up when you still have something to give nothing is really over until the moment you stop trying.

Don’t be afraid to admit that you are less then perfect. It is a fragile thread that binds each of us to each other.

Don’t be afraid to encounter risks. It is by taking chances that we learn how to be brave.

Don’t shut love out of your life by saying it impossible to find. The quickest way to receive love is to give love; the fastest way to lose love is to hold it too tightly; and the best way to keep love is to give it wings.

Don’t dismiss your dreams. To be without dreams is to be without hope; to be without hope is to be without purpose.

Don’t run through life so fast that you forget not only where you have been but also where you are going. Life is not a race, but a journey to be savored each step of the way.

 

I honestly believe that following her advice can make a magical difference in ones life. Each entry should be read, thought about, understood and then implemented. In fact I am not sure that doing one a day and then doing some in depth thinking about how the suggestion applies to me and then building on what I discover would result in actions that would lead to an even greater degree of personal satisfaction. Do me a favor, stop and read what she says again this time slowly, it will be time well spent.

~~~

A great attitude does much more than turn on the lights in our worlds; it seems to magically connect us to all sorts of serendipitous opportunities that were somehow absent before the change.

Earl Nightingale

~~~

Sam Cohen, father of 3 and faithful husband for over 40 years, unexpectedly drops dead one day. His lawyer informs his widow that Stu Schwartz, Sam’s best friend since childhood, is to be executor of the will. The day comes to divide Sam’s earthly possessions, over a million dollars’ worth. In front of Sam’s family, Stu reads the will:

"Stu, if you’re reading this, then I must be dead. You’ve were such a good friend for so long, how can I ignore you in this will? On the other hand, there are my beloved Sophie and my children to be looked after. Stu, I know you can make sure my family is taken care of properly. So Stu, give what you want to her and take the rest for yourself." Stu then looks at the survivors and tells them that, in accordance with Sam’s instructions, Stu will give fifty thousand dollars to Sam’s widow. The rest he is retaining for himself.

The family is beside itself. "This is impossible! Forty years of marriage and then *this*?!  It can’t be!" So the family sues. Their day in court arrives, and after testimony from both sides, the judge gives his verdict: "To Stuart Schwartz, I award fifty thousand dollars of the contested money. The remainder shall go to Sophie Cohen, widow of the deceased."

Needless to say, the family is elated, but Stu is dumbfound. "Your honor, how can you do this? The will made Sam’s wishes quite clear: ‘Give what you want to her and take the rest for yourself!’  I wanted the lion’s share! What gives?"

The judge answered back, "Mr. Schwartz, Sam Cohen knew you his whole life. He wanted to give you something in gratitude. He also wanted to see his family taken care of. So he drew up his will accordingly. But you misread his instructions. You see, Sam knew just what kind of a person you are, so with his family’s interest in mind, he didn’t say, "Give what you want to her and keep the rest for yourself.’  No. What Sam said was, "Give what YOU want to HER; and keep the rest for yourself."

~~~

Q: What do you instantly know when you see a well-dressed husband?

A: His wife is good at choosing his clothes.

~~~

Stan was having problems in English class, so his teacher decided to stop by on her way home to speak with his parents. When she rang the bell, Stan answered.

"I’d like to talk to your mother or father," she said.

"Sorry, but they ain’t here."

"Stan!" she said, "what is it with your grammar?"

"Beats me," he replied, "but dad sure was mad that they had t’go bail her out again!"

~~~

When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one thing : either the car or his wife is new.

~~~

Hi Mom. Can I leave the kids with you tonight?

You’re going out?

Yes.

With whom?

With a friend.

I don’t know why you left your husband. He is such a good man.

I didn’t leave him. He left me!

You let him leave you, and now you go out with anybody and nobody.

I do not go out with anybody. Can I bring over the kids?

I never left you to go out with anybody except your father.

There are lots of things that you did and I don’t.

What are you hinting at?

Nothing. I just want to know if I can bring the kids over tonight.

You’re going to stay the night with him? What will your husband say if he finds out?

My EX husband. I don’t think he would be bothered.  From the day he left me, he probably never slept alone!

So you’re going to sleep over at this loser’s place?

He’s not a loser.

A man who goes out with a divorced woman with children is a loser and a parasite.

I don’t want to argue. Should I bring over the kids or not?

Poor children with such a mother.

Such as what?

With no stability. No wonder your husband left you.

ENOUGH !!

Don’t scream at me. You probably scream at this loser too!

Now you’re worried about the loser?

Ah, so you see he’s a loser. I spotted him immediately.

Goodbye, mother.

Wait! Don’t hang up! When are you bringing them over?

I’m not bringing them over! I’m not going out!

If you never go out, how do you expect to meet anyone?

~~~

For the man sound of body and serene of mind there is no such thing as bad weather;

every day has its beauty, and storms which whip the blood do but make it pulse more vigorously.

George Robert Gissing

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

 

Ray Mitchell

 Indianapolis, Indiana

 Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies.

The editor is somewhat senile.

 

This daily is sent only to special people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can join at http://groups.google.com/group/Rays-Daily. Back issues are posted at http://raykiwsp.multiply.com/journal currently there are about 1500 readers from all over the world.

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