Ray's musings and humor

“We don’t inherit the earth from our ancestors, we borrow it from our children”

David Brower

 

 

I read an article on the US Federal Budget deficit yesterday written by Patrick Edaburn in which he reported:

“The Bush Administration today announced a projected budget deficit of $ 490 billion for Fiscal Year 2009 (October 1, 2008 to September 30, 2009). Just to put that in proper perspective it is $490,000,000,000 or about $ 1,650 per person for the single budget year alone. This will bring the national debt to nearly $ 10 trillion dollars which pans out to $ 10,000,000,000,000 or in excess of $ 32,000 per person.”

I don’t know about you but my wife and I don’t have an extra $64,000 laying around and I really get concerned about my kids. My son has five in his family so he owes $160,000. As I thought about what I read I came up with the following.

Me: What are we going to do about this huge debt? Mr. Washington: Don’t worry about it we’ll just borrow what we need from Asians and others.

Me: But won’t that mean more interest and more debt? Mr. Washington: Well yes but they are good for it and we can always borrow more.

Me: Hold on that means the dollar gets weaker and things cost more doesn’t it? Mr. Washington: Yes but that’s good because we get to pay our debts with cheaper dollars.

Me: Whoa hold on, I am on a pretty much fixed income and others who are lucky enough to have pensions are totally on fixed incomes so what they have will buy less and maybe not buy enough for them to meet their needs. Mr. Washington: That may be true but it is not the government’s fault that people didn’t save enough years ago they should have known that what we said would happen probably wouldn’t.

Me: Jeez, we can’t pay for a broken Social Security system, a Medicare system that can’t keep up now and soon will be flooded with baby boomers, and we have ever mounting fuel and food costs and everyone continues to borrow. Mr. Government: Yep, that’s the American way. But I don’t understand what bothers you, you don’t have to pay, we’ll borrow enough to cover today’s needs and trust me things are going to be great in a decade or so and your kids can pay the bill.

Me: Ya sure, I have heard that song before. Mr. Government: Well I don’t have time to spend with you, you’re a trouble maker, I’m going to go be with people who appreciate all we are doing for them.

Me: That was awful, sorry kids I tried.

~~~

“Debt is the slavery of the free”

Publilius Syrus

~~~

When Peters learned that he was being fired, he went to see the head of human resources. "Since I’ve been with the firm for so long," he said, "I think I deserve at least a letter of recommendation."

The human resources director agreed and said he’d have the letter the next day.

The following morning, Peters found the letter on his desk. It read, "Jonathan Peters worked for our company for eleven years. When he left us, we were very satisfied."

~~~

Courage does not always roar. Sometimes it is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, "I will try again tomorrow."

~~~

From a passenger ship, one can just barely see a bearded man on a small island in the distance who is shouting and desperately waving his hands.

"Who is that?" a passenger asked a passing steward.

"I have no idea. Every year when we pass by, he goes nuts."

~~~

The statement below is true.

The statement above is false.

~~~

The first graders were attending their first music lesson. The teacher was trying to start at the very beginning. She drew a musical staff on the blackboard and asked a little girl to come up and write a note on it.

The little girl went to the blackboard, looked thoughtful for a minute and wrote, "Dear Aunt Emma. Just a short note to tell you I’m fine."

~~~

To learn from mistakes, you must know you’re making them.

~~~

A guy is driving around Newfoundland and he sees a sign in front of a house: "Talking Dog For Sale." He rings the bell and the owner tells him the dog is in the backyard. The guy goes into the backyard and sees a Labrador retriever sitting there.

You talk?" he asks. "Yes, I do," the Lab replies. "So, what’s your story?"

The Lab looks up and says, "Well, I discovered that I could talk when I was pretty young. I wanted to help the government, so I told CSIS about my gift, and in no time, at all they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders, and because no one figured a dog would be eavesdropping. I was one of their most valuable spies for eight years running." "But the jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn’t getting any younger so I decided to settle down. I signed up for a job at the airport to do some undercover security – wandering near suspicious characters and listening in."

"I uncovered some incredible dealings and was awarded a batch of medals. I got married, had a mess of puppies, and now I’m just retired."

The guy is amazed. He goes back in and asks the owner what he wants for the dog.

Ten dollars," the Newfie says. "Ten dollars? This dog is amazing. Why on earth are you selling him so cheap?" "Because he’s a liar. He never did any of that stuff."

~~~

Humility, like darkness, reveals the heavenly lights.

Henry David Thoreau

~~~

Early one morning, my husband, who works in a funeral home, woke me, complaining about severe abdominal pains. We rushed to the emergency room, where tests were performed to determine the source of the pain.

My husband decided not to have me call in sick for him until we knew what was wrong. When the results came back, the nurse informed us that, true to our suspicions, he was suffering from a kidney stone.

I turned to my husband and asked, "Would you like me to call the funeral home now?"

With a scornful look, the nurse turned to me and snapped, "Honey, he’s not that sick!"

~~~

A diet is when you have to go to some length to change your width.

~~~

The temporary Sunday School teacher was struggling to open a combination lock on the supply cabinet. She had been told the combination, but couldn’t quite remember it. Finally, she went to the pastor’s study and asked for help.

The pastor came into the room and began to turn the dial. After the first two numbers he paused and stared blankly for a moment. Finally, he looked serenely heavenward and his lips moved silently. Then he looked back at the lock, and quickly turned to the final number, and opened the lock.

The teacher was amazed, "I’m in awe of your faith, pastor."

"It’s really nothing," he answered. "The number is written on a piece of tape on the ceiling."

~~~

And now a word from our sponsor… BUY!!!!!

~~~

A man mentioned to his landlord about the tenants in the apartment over his. "Many a night they stamp on the floor and shout till midnight."

When the landlord asked if it bothered him, he replied, "Not really, as I usually stay up and practice my trumpet till about that time most every night anyway."

~~~

“As an individual who undertakes to live by borrowing, soon finds his original means devoured by interest, and next no one left to borrow from – so must it be with a new government”

Abraham Lincoln

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

 Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana, USA

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies.

The editor is somewhat senile.

This daily is sent only to special people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can join at http://groups.google.com/group/Rays-Daily. Back issues are posted at http://360.yahoo.com/raykiwsp currently there are about 1000 readers from all over the world.

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