Ray's musings and humor

“The hardest thing you can do is smile when you are ill, in pain, or depressed. But this no-cost remedy is a necessary first half-step if you are to start on the road to recovery.”

Allen Klein

 

 

Hi all, I am back, but only for one week. My three day hospital stay last week ended up being five days. They started me on my new drug and then decided to up the dosage and restart the three day observation clock. At least there was no cutting this time, only lot’s of needles during their Dracula imitation period. They were a little sneaky though as my main blood draws and EKG’s took place between 2:30 and 4:30 AM. I think they did it then so they could sneak up on me while I was still groggy from being awaken.

It went well, although I am still adjusting and had to cancel a meeting this afternoon. I have a blood draw on Wednesday and an EKG on Friday just to make sure I am still breathing. This is a little more scientific than in the past my first Doc use to have me breathe on a mirror and if it fogged up he would declare me alive and send me on my way.

This hospital stay was at the St. Vincent Heart Center here in Indianapolis. The staff was the most gracious I have ever experienced. They all went out of their way to make myself and the other patients as comfortable and happy as possible. I have never been where the cleaning people, food delivery staff, the nurses and technicians all went the extra mile like these good people did. I don’t like staying in the hospital but this was about as pleasant experience as one could have.

I thought as I was leaving that the recruiters must set the highest priority on attracting and keeping people who genuinely like people. It again demonstrated to me what I always found in business, friendly, courteous, caring people are the secret to a successful enterprise. And do you know what, in almost every case they are also the most competent people you’ll meet.

Anyway friends I am glad to be back, I missed you all. I am now working on full recovery. I still have a ways to go though, I tried to jump over a building this morning and really hit my head hard, but at least it was at the third floor level so I am on my way back.

~~~

“It is important to remember that we all have magic inside us.”

Joanne Kathleen Rowling

~~~

He said: Yesterday my brother Jim was taking a test required for a management job with a local trucking company.   Part of the test involved a verbal section given by the company employment director (or whatever).

Question: "You are driving a forklift and 2 men get in your way, what do you do?"

My brother’s answer: "Go for the one with the most seniority!"

~~~

What is a friend? A single soul shared by two people. Aristotle

~~~

Found on the retirement village bulletin board

FOXY LADY: Sexy, fashion-conscious blue-haired beauty, 80’s, slim,5’4" used to be 5-6), searching for sharp-looking, sharp-dressing companion. Matching white shoes and belt a plus.

LONG-TERM COMMITMENT: Recent widow who has just buried fourth husband, and  am looking for someone to round out a six-unit plot. Dizziness, fainting, shortness of breath not a problem.

SERENITY NOW: I am into solitude, long walks, sunrises, the ocean, yoga and  meditation. If you are the silent type, let’s get together, take our hearing aids out and enjoy quiet times.

WINNING SMILE: Active grandmother with original teeth seeking a dedicated flosser to share rare steaks, corn on the cob and caramel candy.

BEATLES OR STONES? I still like to rock, still like to cruise in my Camaro on Saturday nights and still like to play the guitar. If you were a groovy chick, or are now a groovy hen, let’s get together and listen to my eight-track tapes.

MEMORIES: I can usually remember Monday through Thursday. If you can remember Friday, Saturday and Sunday, let’s put our two heads together.

MINT CONDITION: Male, 1932, high mileage, good condition, some hair, many new parts including hip, knee, cornea, valves. Isn’t in running condition, but walks well.

~~~

Buddhist approaches a hotdog vendor and says: "Make me one with everything."

He gives the vendor a $20 bill and waits. Finally he says: "Where’s my change?"

Says the vendor: "All change must come from within."

~~~

Lester Moore was a Wells, Fargo Co. station agent for Naco, Arizona in the cowboy days of the 1880s. He’s buried in the Boot Hill Cemetery in Tombstone, Arizona:

Here lies Lester Moore

Four slugs from a .44

No Les No More.

~~~

"Half our live is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed though life trying to save."

Will Rogers

~~~

A hospital posted a notice in the nurses’ mess saying:

"Remember, the first five minutes of a human being’s life are the most dangerous."

Underneath, a nurse had written:

"The last five are pretty risky, too."

~~~

When my son was in third grade, his teacher asked him to spell "straight."  He did so correctly.

"Now," said the teacher, "what does it mean?"

"Without water," he replied.

~~~

It’s easier to get older than it is to get wiser.

~~~

A man goes to the doctor and tells him that he hasn’t been feeling well. The doctor examines him, leaves the room and comes back with three different bottles of pills.

The doctor says, "Take the green pill with a big glass of water when you get up. Take the blue pill with a big glass of water after lunch. Then just before going to bed, take the red pill with another big glass of water."

Startled to be put on so much medicine the man stammers, "Jeez doc, exactly what’s my problem?"

Doctor says, "You’re not drinking enough water."

~~~

We cannot cure the world of sorrows, but we can choose to live in joy.

Joseph Campbell

~~~

Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

 Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana, USA

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies.

The editor is somewhat senile.

This daily is sent only to special people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can join at http://groups.google.com/group/Rays-Daily. Back issues are posted at http://360.yahoo.com/raykiwsp currently there are about 1000 readers from all over the world.
 

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