Walking isn’t a lost art: one must, by some means, get to the garage.
First I want to thank those of you who sent me your best wishes for me to have successful heart surgery. It worked! The doctors are optimistic that they were able to eliminate the sources of my extraneous heartbeats and that I now have a good chance of staying Atrial Fibrillation free. It was a long procedure and I was in operating rooms from about 8 AM until around 4 PM fortunately I was sedated for a major part of the time. I was not a trouble free patient so they had to really knock me out.
I was out of the hospital and home to bed the second day and am yet to drive but will do so in a day or two. Other than some discomfort from the actual incisions and a sore throat from the Trans Esophageal Echo (TEE) test they had to do before doing the heart ablation I am doing pretty well. The TEE is where they stick this length of sewer pipe down your throat to make sure there are no problems that would complicate the surgery; it is kind of like a reverse Colonoscopy except that this leaves its presence known in your throat for days after.
I had to go in for a blood draw this morning but unfortunately my blood has not thinned down enough so I have to continue giving myself shots for a couple more days, and that’s no fun. They’ll check me again Wednesday morning and hopefully I will be able to stop the shots.
I will increase my activity each day and plan on attending our City’s annual International Festival next Sunday afternoon. After that watch out, I hope to become as active as I use to be.
Today I started my weight loss program and plan on being back on the treadmill in a week or two. I have a lot of weight to loose and a lot of stamina to regain.
Again thanks for being my friend and for your prayers and good thoughts.
It’s a small world, but I wouldn’t want to have to paint it.
He said: Both sides of our family turned out for my wife’s college graduation. After the dean finished awarding all the diplomas, he requested, "Will all the cum laudes please stand up"?
My mother-in-law leaned over and whispered, "Wow! The Cum Laude family sure has a lot of kids!"
"Your manuscript is both good and original, but the part that is good is not original and the part that is original is not good."
As a language teacher, I usually award certificates of merit to deserving students. One year, I decided to change the format of the certificates and use a seal stamped with my initials.
I called a number of places to buy sealing wax, but they all had identical reactions: a long silence followed by an apology for not having any in stock.
On my last call, there was the silence, but then the salesman asked, "Why ceiling as opposed to floor?"
“Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.”
Consider the case of Frederick II, an 18th-century king of Prussia. Frederick fancied himself an enlightened monarch, and in some respects he was. On one occasion, he is supposed to have interested himself in the conditions of a Berlin prison. He was escorted through it so that he might speak to the prisoners.
One after the other, the prisoners fell to their knees before him, bewailing their lot and, predictably, protesting their utter innocence of all charges that had been brought against them.
Only one prisoner remained silent, and finally Frederick’s curiosity was aroused.
"You," he called. "You, there!"
The prisoner looked up. "Yes, your majesty?"
"Why are you here?"
"Armed robbery, your majesty."
"And are you guilty?"
"Entirely guilty, your majesty. I richly deserve my punishment."
At this Frederick rapped his cane sharply on the ground and said, "Warden, release this guilty wretch at once. I will not have him here in jail where by example he will corrupt all the splendid innocent people who occupy it."
A true friend never gets in your way unless you happen to be going down.
Bubba Dean goes to the tent revival and listens to the preacher. After awhile, the preacher asks anyone with needs to come forward and be prayed over. Bubba Dean slowly rises from his chair and gets in line.
When it’s his turn the preacher says, "Bubba Dean, what ya want me to pray about?"
Bubba Dean says, "Preacher, I need ya to pray for my hearin’."
So the preacher puts his right finger in Bubba Dean’s right ear and his left hand on top of his head and prays a while. Then the preacher puts his left finger in Bubba Dean’s left ear and his right hand on top of his head and prays some more. After a few minutes, the preacher removes his hands and says, "Bubba Dean, how’s your hearin’ now?"
Bubba Dean says, "I don’t know Preacher, it ain’t ’til 10:00 next Wednesday mornin’."
It’s time to start living the life you’ve imagined.
A couple whose marriage was going on the rocks sought the advice of a marriage counselor. The counselor pleaded with them to patch up their quarrel, but they were adamant. "So," said the counselor, "you know the consequences and you want to part. Remember this. You must divide your property equally."
The wife flared up. "You mean the $4,000 I have saved up? I must give him half? My money?"
"Yes," said the counselor. "He gets $2,000. You get $2,000."
"What about my furniture? I paid for that."
"Same thing," answered the counselor. "Your husband gets the bedroom and the living room; you get the dining room and the kitchen."
There was a challenging gleam in the wife’s eye. "What about our three children?" That stumped him. Shrewdly he assayed the situation, then he came up with a Solomonic answer. "Go back and live together until your fourth child is born. Then you take two children and your husband takes two."
The wife shook her head. "No, I’m sure that wouldn’t work out. If I depended on him, I wouldn’t have the three I got."
Right now I’m having amnesia and déjà vu at the same time. I think I’ve forgotten this before.
Two mothers are having a conversation about their children.
"How do you get your Pauly up so early on school mornings?" asks one of them.
"Oh, that’s easy," replies the other. "I just throw the cat on his bed."
"Why does that wake him up?"
"He sleeps with the dog."
Life is short, break the rules.
Forgive quickly, kiss slowly, love truly, laugh uncontrollably and never regret anything that made you smile.
Stay well, do good work, and have fun.
Indianapolis, Indiana, USA
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The editor is somewhat senile.