Ray's musings and humor


History is a cyclic poem written by Time upon the memories of man.

Percy Bysshe Shelley



I just discovered that I miss the action of the past more than I realized. Today it was triggered by an article in Foreign Policy magazine that reported on how spending just a few dollars on micronutrient supplementation could improve the lives of millions of children. Of course I already knew that from the years I spent working with Kiwanis International and UNICEF on global iodine deficiency. Adding iodine, vitamin A, and Iron into the diet of children can make an unbelievable difference in their health and capabilities.


I miss my visits to Washington where we worked with congressional committees and the US Agency for International Development and others, as advocates for children. I miss the many friends at UNICEF from all over the globe who continue to help the children of the world and wish I was again with them. I miss interacting with the scientists and public health experts from the US Center for Disease Control, the World Health Organizations, private industry, and other worthwhile organizations. These friends and colleagues continue to do what needs to be done. They don’t need me anymore, I was never that important anyway. As many of you know I left the effort a number of years ago when I retired for the last time. I now realize how important what I was doing was to me and how rewarding it was to have an opportunity to do something of value. To this day I often think about my friends but seldom hear from them. When I learn what is left yet to do I end up wishing that I could again be a player.


Enough of that! For the past few days I have written about enriching our own lives. Mine is great. I am given many opportunities to help alleviate local problems, I travel, I learn, and I make new friends every day. I guess having a twinge of nostalgia for the past now and then is only because I was so lucky to be able to do as much as I did.


“Remember your humanity and forget the rest”

Albert Einstein


Extra, Extra Read All About It

Headlines from the past

Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says

Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers

Safety Experts Say School Bus Passengers Should Be Belted

Drunk Gets Nine Months in Violin Case

Survivor of Siamese Twins Joins Parents

Farmer Bill Dies in House

Iraqi Head Seeks Arms

Is There a Ring of Debris around Uranus?


Ever notice that the people who are late are often much jollier than the people who have to wait for them.


On his first visit to the zoo, a little boy stared at the caged stork for a long time. He waved, jumped up and down, and stared at the stork a while longer.

Finally, turning to his father, he exclaimed, "Gee, Dad, he doesn’t recognize me."


A truly happy person is one who can enjoy the scenery on a detour.


A woman goes to England to attend a 2-week, company training session. Her husband drives her to the airport and wishes her to have a good trip.

The wife answers: "Thank you honey, what would you like me to bring for you?"

The husband laughs and says: "An English girl !!!" The woman kept quiet and left.

Two weeks later he picks her up in the airport and asks: "So, honey, how was the trip?"

"Very good, thank you." she replies "

And, what happened to my present?" he asks.

"Which present?" she replied, forgetting about what they had said before she left.

"What I asked for: the English girl?!" he reminded her.

"Oh, that!" She said, suddenly remembering what they’d talked about "Well, I did what I could, now we have to wait a few months to see if its a girl !!!"


One who lacks the courage to start has already finished.


Jill wanted a divorce from Todd.  The judge asked, "What fault do you find with your husband?"

"Your Honor, he’s a liar, a brute, a thief and a brainless idiot."

"That’s very serious," exclaimed his Honor, "Can you prove all that?"

"Prove it? Why everybody knows it."

"If you knew all this, then why did you marry him?"

"I didn’t know it before I married him."

Todd shouted out, "She did too!"


Education gets you the only important thing in life. An assigned parking space.


While attending a convention, three psychiatrists take a walk.

"People are always coming to us with their guilt and fears," one says, "but we have no one to go to with our own problems."

"Since we’re all professionals," another suggests, "why don’t we hear each other out right now?"

They agreed this is a good idea. The first psychiatrist confesses, "I’m a compulsive shopper and deeply in debt, so I usually over bill my patients as often as I can."

The second admits, "I have a drug problem that’s out of control, and I frequently pressure my patients into buying illegal drugs for me."

The third psychiatrist says, "I know it’s wrong, but no matter how hard I try, I just can’t keep a secret."


In my day, we didn’t have water. We had to smash together our own hydrogen and oxygen atoms.


An eccentric philosophy professor gave a one question final exam after a semester dealing with a broad array of topics.

The class was already seated and ready to go when the professor picked up his chair, plopped it on his desk and wrote on the board: "Using everything we have learned this semester, prove that this chair does not exist."

Fingers flew, erasers erased, notebooks were filled in furious fashion. Some students wrote over 30 pages in one hour attempting to refute the existence of the chair.  One member of the class however, was up and finished in less than a minute.

Weeks later when the grades were posted, the rest of the group wondered how he could have gotten an A when he had barely written anything at all. His answer consisted of two words: "What chair?"


The restaurant was so bad, the doggie bags had a warning: Not for consumption by real dogs.


There are only two things to worry about.

Either you are well or you are sick.

If you are well, then there is nothing to worry about.

But if you are sick, there are only two things to worry about.

Either you will get well or you will die.

If you get well, there is nothing to worry about.

If you die, there are only two things to worry about.

Either you will go to heaven or hell.

If you go to heaven there is nothing to worry about. But if you go to hell, you’ll be so busy shaking hands with friends you wouldn’t have time to worry!


“Remember, people will judge you by your actions, not your intentions.

You may have a heart of gold — but so does a hard-boiled egg.”



Stay well, do good work, and have fun.

 Ray Mitchell

Indianapolis, Indiana, USA

Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies.

The editor is somewhat senile.

This daily is sent only to special people who want to start their day on an upbeat. If you have system overload because of our daily clutter, let me know and I will send you the information via mental telepathy. If you have not been getting our daily you can join at http://groups.google.com/group/Rays-Daily. Back issues are posted at http://360.yahoo.com/raykiwsp currently there are about 1000 readers from all over the world.

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