Don’t sacrifice your life to work and ideals.
The most important things in life are human relations. I found that out too late.
Katharinde Susannah Prichard
I have been thinking lately about how we change as life goes on. Some of us seem to get better, both mentally and philosophically, while others seem to deteriorate both mentally and socially. The sad part is that so much depends on the choices we make. I recently read a piece on Sure Ways to Lose Your Common Sense by Susan Dunn.
Dunn says that common sense is roughly equivalent to Emotional Intelligence. Whether or not we’re born with it and then lose it, or aren’t born with it and have to acquire it, it’s not something we can get from book learning. We have to expose ourselves to new ideas, new people and situations, and have the set of competencies which allows us to react effectively with reality. I agree with what she says and believe that if we don’t retain our Emotional Intelligence we will stagnate and deteriorate. Here are some of the ways she offers to those of us who just don’t care and who are willing to slip into the doldrums.
Lose the common touch.
Have more money than common sense (or taste). Use your money to buy your way out of problems and to avoid those nasty mutual obligations and responsibilities that come with real relationships. Quit asking your friends over to help you paint your house – pay a painter. Quit going over there to help them paint theirs – just send a check. You can do that for war relief, poverty, homelessness and anything else that "bothers" you!
In the workplace, maintain a strict line between salaried and non-salaried personnel. Don’t interact with those "above" or "below" you to find out what they know you don’t know.
I really believe that those of us who walk away from others lose much of the joy in life. Sadly some of us get so enamored with our importance that we only hang out with others who are enamored with their importance. Soon everyone looks alike and thinks alike and become unbelievably boring.
Don’t get your hands dirty.
No need to "touch" things you don’t need to. Get in your ivory tower and stay there. Deal with it idealistically and theoretically. Read about it. Assign it to others. Don’t test your thoughts and feelings against new realities.
I have found that it is impossible to hear children laughing from the top of the ivory tower.
Use your power to isolate yourself.
Intimidate others so they no longer speak the truth to you or around you. Consensual validation is part of reality-testing. Lose the "consensus" and you lose reality. If you work it right, you can arrange to hear only what you want to hear and already believe to be true.
Sadly too many validate something to be true only if it agrees with their belief, opinion, or prejudice. It is living in the market place of ideas that growth and understanding is developed. In my experience those who know they are never wrong often are.
Quit thinking for yourself.
Advice is plentiful; just ask someone else what to do. Why struggle? Pay them for their opinion if necessary, but avoid the hard work and introspection of developing your own wisdom. For extra credit, keep "thinking" and "feeling" totally separate. Compartmentalize everything you can. Bonus points: If something goes wrong, you can blame someone else!
Stop thinking, stop feeling, and whither away, no thanks, not for me. I have way to much to learn.
You should always learn, with life comes wisdom and with wisdom comes the courage to live your life selflessly. The more you learn about yourself and the experiences surrounding your life the more opportunities you have to make your life better and more fulfilling.
It was Palm Sunday and, because of a sore throat, five-year-old Johnny stayed home from church with a sitter. When the family returned home, they were carrying several palm branches. The boy asked what they were for. "People held them over Jesus’ head as he walked by," his older brother explained. "Wouldn’t you know it," the boy fumed. "The one Sunday I don’t go, He showed up."
Those who love deeply never grow old; they may die of old age, but they die young.
He said: Our mom needed a new mattress for her antique bed, so my brother, Josh, and I decided to buy her one as a gift. The problem was we weren’t sure what to get, because it was an odd size. Fortunately, my brother happened to be visiting my mother one day when I called home.
"Measure the bed frame before you leave," I told him.
"I don’t have a tape measure."
"You can use a dollar bill," I suggested, "each one is six inches long."
"Can’t," he replied after digging through his wallet, "I only have a ten."
"Hubert Humphrey talks so fast that listening to him is like trying to read a Playboy with your wife turning the pages."
Barry Goldwater, 1964 Republican presidential nominee
The budget-minded women was always clipping coupons in the young, lean years when she was first married, and even kept detailed records of how much money she saved. One of her first jobs way back then was running the cash register at the local drugstore. One day, she had a self-conscious young man approach the counter to buy some condoms. She noticed a dollar-off coupon on the box and asked him if he’d like to use it, adding that she and her husband had saved over $400 redeeming coupons last year.
The stunned young man replied, "On these?!"
"My kids just don’t understand my logic. They fail to see why the have to go to bed when I’m tired."
We finally got a local doctor who set-up his practice right in his home. He was awakened one morning about 4:00 A.M. by a man who said he brought his wife in.
Thinking it to be an emergency, the doctor hurried out to the truck with the man. There sat a healthy looking young woman whom the doctor had just seen the day before.
"Good morning Doctor." she smiled. "You told me to come in for a blood test this morning before breakfast."
Proud father to mother as they watched their small son lying on the floor studying by the light from the TV screen.
"Reminds you of Abe Lincoln, doesn’t it?"
A woman brought an old picture of her dead husband, wearing a hat, to the photographer.
She asked the photographer if he could remove the hat from the picture.
He convinced her he could easily do that, and asked her what side of his head he parted his hair on.
"I forget," she said. "But you can see that for yourself when you take off his hat."
Learn as if you were going to live forever.
Live as if you were going to die tomorrow.
Stay well, do good work, and have fun.
Indianapolis, Indiana, USA
Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies.
The editor is somewhat senile.