"If you had a friend who talked to you like you sometimes talk to yourself, would you continue to hang around with that person?"
Here is what Vicki Miller a Life Transition Coach wrote when she read the quote:
When I read the above quote by Rob Bremer, my first thought was – how true! If someone talked to us like we often talk to ourselves, we would avoid that person at all costs.
I notice that golfers are especially good at beating themselves up! Here’s a recent example:
Over Memorial Day weekend, my husband and I played golf with another person. It was a beautiful day and the course was wide open – which is unusual for a holiday. Everything was going great until this other golfer missed his first putt. As soon as this happened, he became very angry and started belittling himself with words like "stupid, idiot, and jerk". He was so upset with himself that his negative "chatter" continued to the next tee box. This negativity became his primary focus so when he hit the ball off the next tee it was, of course, another "bad shot" (in his mind). This led to cursing and more self deprecation. As we progressed with the round, his words became a self-fulfilling prophecy.
We all have these internal thoughts going on. The danger comes from repeating the negative messages to the point we create a limiting belief. When we continually say we are incompetent, inferior, unworthy, or incapable, we are creating the very reality that we don’t want!
Breaking this negative chatter habit is one of the greatest gifts you can give yourself. You can stop perpetuating the lies you tell yourself by replacing the "old tapes" with new positive messages. One that I am working on right now is to replace any negative messages about exercise and fitness with this new phrase: "I am healthy, trim and toned!"
Pay attention to the phrases you use about yourself each day. Would you say these same things to a friend? If not, then change your words. Be a better friend to yourself!
This is a great message. I spend a lot of time with people who are down on themselves only because they think they are less then they really are. Sometimes we spend hours building lists of all their attributes and they are surprised at how good they really are. As we have often said, your ultimate judge is yourself, if you keep trying to convince yourself that something is wrong with you, your judgment will be subjective and not objective, you will sell yourself on the idea that you have failed. You are so much better than that! I don’t want to hear what’s wrong; I want to know what’s right.
What lie behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.
Ralph Waldo Emerson
TWENTY NEW MANAGEMENT STYLES
1) MANAGING BY WALKING FASTER THEN THE EMPLOYEES: These kind of managers you will always see in the corridor, ten steps away. "We’ll have to talk" you can hear them say, just as they have disappeared around the corner.
2) MANAGING BY STARING OUT OF THE WINDOW: These managers you usually meet with their backside faced to you with their hands in their pockets. When you talk to them, their thoughts keep staring out of the windows.
3) MANAGING BY POST-IT’S: Some managers forget everything. They want to impress you with their ‘busy’ness by continuously writing on Post-it’s while you are talking.
4) MANAGING BY DELEGATION TO THE SECRETARY: These managers just delegate everything to the secretary. If He is good, He knows what she must do.
5) MANAGING BY KNOWING NOTHING: These managers don’t really know anything at all. They let YOU give answers. Meanwhile they fill the time with nice anecdotes of irrelevant cases.
6) MANAGING BY CONCEPTUAL THINKING: These people try to explain the present from a theoretical view of the far future. The idea that this never will work, completely satisfies them: They will always have something to talk about.
7) MANAGING BY HIDING INFORMATION: Information hiders are aware of the market value of strictly secret kept information. You must be very thankful to get any information at all.
8) MANAGING BY DOING EXACTLY WHAT THE BOSS SAYS: These managers prevent their bosses from creative thinking. Else they got more work to do.
9) MANAGING BY WALKING ONE FOOT BEHIND THE BOSS: In hierarchical organizations you can watch those groups walking in the corridor. The more equal managers are directly followed by the lesser equal managers, and so on.
10) MANAGING BY SMILING AND WEARING NICE SUITS: If you drink beer with them, lunch with them, smile to them and also wear nice suits, nothing can stop your career anymore.
11) MANAGING BY STUDYING: Despite their continual attendances of all kind of studies and congresses, they still belong to category 5. The longer they learn, the further they get from the practice.
12) MANAGING BY CREATING VAGUE OVERHEAD SHEETS: Do you know them? Those sheets with some big arrows, boxes or circles? These sheets provide the ultimate proof of their overall brilliance.
13) MANAGING BY OPEN DOOR AND EMPTY ROOM: This is a major improvement of the older ‘OPEN DOOR’ management style. Now you can really walk in and out anytime you want. Nobody ever knows where these managers are.
14) MANAGING BY SPEAKING WITH OTHER MANAGERS: This kind of managing is very popular. It will give them within a few hours the same information as an employee can tell them in 15 minutes.
15) MANAGING BY HAVING A NON SUPPORTING INFRASTRUCTURE:
In an organization with a hopeless infrastructure, managers are really necessary. These managers will naturally prevent the organization from having a better infrastructure.
16) BUA MANAGEMENT ( BY USING ABBREVIATIONS ): This management style is ATRASACWOC. ( Adopted To Reach A Shorter And Clearer Way Of Communication )
17) MANAGING BY USING BUZZ WORDS: These managers like to bluff your head off with hip, nearly undefined, terms.
18) MANAGING BY REORGANIZATION: If they think there is nothing more to organize, they reorganize.
19) MANAGING BY BELIEVING: These managers must be spiritual educated, because they have no clues at all.
20) MANAGING BY FORGETTING PROMISES: If you remind them to one of their promises, the priority of that promise is to low to remember.
Anyone who asks a question might be a fool for 5 minutes, but a person who doesn’t ask, is a fool forever.
She said: My husband and I had been trying to have a third child for awhile. Unfortunately, the day I was to take a home pregnancy test, he was called out of town on business. I had told our young daughters about the test, and they were excited. We decided if it was positive, we would buy a baby outfit to surprise their father when he got home.
The three of us stood in the bathroom eagerly waiting for the telltale line to appear. When it did not, my thoughtful seven-year-old gave me a hug. "It’s okay, Mom," she said. "The next time Daddy goes out of town, you can try and get pregnant again."
My mind is a garden. My thoughts are the seeds. My harvest will be either flower or weeds.
He said: I moved from Southern California up to a rural area of the Pacific Northwest recently. While the scenery up here is beautiful, the women-folk do leave a little to be desired in the areas of vanity and appeal. I won’t be the one to say they’re NOT attractive, but they held a beauty-pageant here last summer… and nobody won.
The tragedy of life is not that it ends so soon,
But that we wait so long to begin it.
W. M. Lewis
Stay well, do good work, and have fun.
Indianapolis, Indiana, USA
Management is not responsible for duplicates from previous dailies.
The editor is somewhat senile.